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Bailing out of socials or dates
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If you don't feel you're matched, how soon do you bail on a social or date and how do you do it?
I bailed on a date tonight after an hour. I kind of knew as soon as we met but we'd agreed to meet for dinner and I was starving    |
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"have dinner go dutch but be honest . just let them know you dont feel any thing sexual .
honesty is always best .
lies hurt a person more x"
Oh I'm not one for lies, life's too short for that shit. I err on brutal honesty at times 
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you don't feel you're matched, how soon do you bail on a social or date and how do you do it?
I bailed on a date tonight after an hour. I kind of knew as soon as we met but we'd agreed to meet for dinner and I was starving "
An hour is a good time. We've met people for dinner but wouldn't again.
We had a meet with a couple once where after what must have been 4 hours of good banter we mentioned taking things further. They said no and later explained by private message they enjoyed spending time with us but the chemistry wasn't there.
Which happens a lot.
Meh, they were newbies, lesson learnt. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you don't feel you're matched, how soon do you bail on a social or date and how do you do it?
I bailed on a date tonight after an hour. I kind of knew as soon as we met but we'd agreed to meet for dinner and I was starving
An hour is a good time. We've met people for dinner but wouldn't again.
We had a meet with a couple once where after what must have been 4 hours of good banter we mentioned taking things further. They said no and later explained by private message they enjoyed spending time with us but the chemistry wasn't there.
Which happens a lot.
Meh, they were newbies, lesson learnt. "
Don't know why.  |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
I've had a few socials over the years where I knew in 3 seconds that it would never go further.
However, I was always happy to spend time chatting to a fellow traveller on the swinging journey. Well worth a meal.
There were a couple of occasions when the lady was less keen than I was, and they stayed too. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
I arranged to meet a guy and knew as soon as he turned up he wasn't for me. But we staying in the pub chatting, and then some live music came on and I had a really good evening. I don't get invited out often enough to bail on a good social. |
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"I've had a few socials over the years where I knew in 3 seconds that it would never go further.
However, I was always happy to spend time chatting to a fellow traveller on the swinging journey. Well worth a meal.
There were a couple of occasions when the lady was less keen than I was, and they stayed too."
That's a lovely perspective x |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"I'd like to think that even if there is no real attraction the chat up to the social means it's worth just having a nice time out with the person 
Unless they are a physco or super dull."
I did once ask a guy to leave because he was creeping me the fuck out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you have arranged a meal then why not have it and put it down to a social?"
If you know more or less straight away
Don't have starters
Just main course
No desert |
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By *ollyGWoman
over a year ago
Southampton |
"If you have arranged a meal then why not have it and put it down to a social?
If you know more or less straight away
Don't have starters
Just main course
No desert "
Just because you don't want to sleep with someone you can still have a good night, surely??? |
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By *ollyGWoman
over a year ago
Southampton |
"Different strokes for different folks. I just think you should be sensitive to the other persons feelings whatever you decide is right for you. "
Exactly! Have a good evening then say goodbye, nobody gets hurt, isn't that what it's all about! |
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I've had socials where I know immediately I don't fancy them , yet I've stayed and had a lovely cuppa tea and even met again for another cuppa another day , just because I don't fancy them doesn't mean I don't enjoy their company .
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had socials where I know immediately I don't fancy them , yet I've stayed and had a lovely cuppa tea and even met again for another cuppa another day , just because I don't fancy them doesn't mean I don't enjoy their company .
"
So Totally true |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Normally meet for a coffee or drink if it's outside a club, you can tell with in 10 minutes if you click. but to be fair 80% bail or do not show up. This is mainly couples and single women, but some do message which is fine as would rather know than sit there on my own. I prefer meeting at clubs as you can still have a good day even if your stitched up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unless they were being weird, creepy or offensive I would see the evening out. I rarely do socials anyway. I think I've had 4 in 4 and a bit years. Two ended in sex. |
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We always start with a social for this very reason. Nice relaxed atmosphere with a few drinks and see how we all get on together, even if there is no intention of meeting again for whatever reason we both try to make the most of it and still enjoy ourselves. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We meet for socials first but keep them brief as you either click or you dont. We have a half hour rule too and then if we don't like someone we make our excuses and leave. I'm very nervous on a meet so socials settle my nerves a bit. One woman we met before we put half hour rule in had us talking for over an hour for her then to say she was too tired and went home. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've had socials where I know immediately I don't fancy them , yet I've stayed and had a lovely cuppa tea and even met again for another cuppa another day , just because I don't fancy them doesn't mean I don't enjoy their company .
"
This  |
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"If you have arranged a meal then why not have it and put it down to a social?
If you know more or less straight away
Don't have starters
Just main course
No desert
No desert are you mad  "
what kind of meal doeant include dessert?? unless its Harvester then i wouldn't bother either.
ps. i wouldn't do a meal date for first meet/social. mostly cos i drop food down myself! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If you have arranged a meal then why not have it and put it down to a social?
If you know more or less straight away
Don't have starters
Just main course
No desert
No desert are you mad
what kind of meal doeant include dessert?? unless its Harvester then i wouldn't bother either.
ps. i wouldn't do a meal date for first meet/social. mostly cos i drop food down myself!"
I can do talking or eating. If I try to do both at the same time, I don't do either very well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I left after 15 minutes once because it was immediately clear I didn't fancy him, didn't really like him and we had nothing to say to each other."
15 minutes was about our record too, but that was with a particularly vile couple. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I left after 15 minutes once because it was immediately clear I didn't fancy him, didn't really like him and we had nothing to say to each other.
15 minutes was about our record too, but that was with a particularly vile couple. "
He wasn't horrible by any stretch of the imagination, I just had no idea what I was going to talk about and wasn't getting much back from him, so I pretended I had to go back to work. |
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