FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Profile Detectives
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"The problem with your post, and EVERY other similar post that asks for profile advice is this: "You can please some of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time." I often think that there are some very basic rules to a profile that may help sweeten the pot, but nothing will work as an exact science because its all subjective to a demographic that is massively diverse. Effort in a profile is the biggest thing in my opinion. Effort to sell yourself, effort to show your good points, effort to show what you are looking for, effort to get some insight into your personality. But the most important thing is being happy with your own profile, happy that it is yours, not designed by the wishes of others. When a profile tries to hard, I think it comes across as desperate or false, which isn't (in my opinion) an attractive or endearing quality. And often when a profile tries to be something it isn't, sooner or later you'll get called on it and found out, because your not being true to yourself, and people will certainly pick up on that. Eventually, it all boils down to a numbers game, and being lucky that a person/persons, that is attracted to your profile (whatever that may be) is most definitely out there and stumbles across your profile." Spot on,i totally agree. Whilst informative profiles work fr one, they dont for another - absolutely...thanks guys | |||
"Your post and profile are polar opposites. The post is unreadable because of no spacing and most will give up before halfway through. The profile is way too short. Find a balance that reflects who you are." | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"Clearly many people have issues with preparing their profiles. I for one have found it quite hard work and extremely frustrating when putting out a profile that 'works'. I found it suprisingly simple to offer my advice in earlier posts on saying and displaying the right things in order not to be cringed at or shunned at the first hurdle, yet I'll be the first to admit i've probably contradicted myself numerous times in reflection to my own profile. However, I am comfortable with what i have written and the images i've selected to display and to be honest as long as I'm tactful with my approach when sending a message I do get some responses, but nowhere near what I'd like. On the flip side its very rare I logon to my account and however many unread mails I have waiting for me, they've actually been sent from a female! If I was gay, well I could probably find a meet 6 times a day, but that's not my flavour! I understand the graft thats involved and the effort that needs to be made if you have any real chance of grabbing the attention of whoever it is your admiring at the time, and of course what one person might like, probably another ten won't, which is why its important to have a sensible profile. My current profile is the product of some quite intense scrutiny and seems to be my most succesful so far. I have tried without any x-rated photo's and all x-rated photo's both of which did'nt really work. I've published quite detailed profiles giving more of an insight into me as a person, what I enjoy, and all the usual stuff, which didn't do too badly, but it seemed to attract the women that are on here to 'make friends' rather than endulge in sexual activity if you get my drift So, there's a mixture up now along with a brief but to the point profile that I feel is adequate enough, and i know that patience is avirtue an'all that, drawing some appreciation but overall still a pretty poor success rate and just wondered what your comments are if you would be kind enough to have a little butchers and offer me your most appreciated advice, negative or positive Hopefully this will help me fine tune my existing profile and attract a bit more attention. So come on, give it to me....do i just come across as a muppet or have I managed to inspire you at all (even if its just a tiny little bit) "Brace Yourself...." Thanks peeps X" . All this just for a shag. If I was you just have a wank | |||
"Clearly many people have issues with preparing their profiles. I for one have found it quite hard work and extremely frustrating when putting out a profile that 'works'. I found it suprisingly simple to offer my advice in earlier posts on saying and displaying the right things in order not to be cringed at or shunned at the first hurdle, yet I'll be the first to admit i've probably contradicted myself numerous times in reflection to my own profile. However, I am comfortable with what i have written and the images i've selected to display and to be honest as long as I'm tactful with my approach when sending a message I do get some responses, but nowhere near what I'd like. On the flip side its very rare I logon to my account and however many unread mails I have waiting for me, they've actually been sent from a female! If I was gay, well I could probably find a meet 6 times a day, but that's not my flavour! I understand the graft thats involved and the effort that needs to be made if you have any real chance of grabbing the attention of whoever it is your admiring at the time, and of course what one person might like, probably another ten won't, which is why its important to have a sensible profile. My current profile is the product of some quite intense scrutiny and seems to be my most succesful so far. I have tried without any x-rated photo's and all x-rated photo's both of which did'nt really work. I've published quite detailed profiles giving more of an insight into me as a person, what I enjoy, and all the usual stuff, which didn't do too badly, but it seemed to attract the women that are on here to 'make friends' rather than endulge in sexual activity if you get my drift So, there's a mixture up now along with a brief but to the point profile that I feel is adequate enough, and i know that patience is avirtue an'all that, drawing some appreciation but overall still a pretty poor success rate and just wondered what your comments are if you would be kind enough to have a little butchers and offer me your most appreciated advice, negative or positive Hopefully this will help me fine tune my existing profile and attract a bit more attention. So come on, give it to me....do i just come across as a muppet or have I managed to inspire you at all (even if its just a tiny little bit) "Brace Yourself...." Thanks peeps X. All this just for a shag. If I was you just have a wank " Hahahahaha true dat !!! Fuck it off mate !!! It's your first message that's counts !!! If you've got decent real life pics of yourself, then the ladies will decide for themselves. Ladies and couples havent got the time to sieve through hundreds of profiles and read them daily !!!!! All my friends I've met on here don't read them. However verifications are a must in my personal opinion to have displayed. You can tell a lot by the people you have met or they have!!! Also tell everyone if your any good at what you claim or not on my profile, which is daft and silly but true | |||
"Clearly many people have issues with preparing their profiles. I for one have found it quite hard work and extremely frustrating when putting out a profile that 'works'. I found it suprisingly simple to offer my advice in earlier posts on saying and displaying the right things in order not to be cringed at or shunned at the first hurdle, yet I'll be the first to admit i've probably contradicted myself numerous times in reflection to my own profile. However, I am comfortable with what i have written and the images i've selected to display and to be honest as long as I'm tactful with my approach when sending a message I do get some responses, but nowhere near what I'd like. On the flip side its very rare I logon to my account and however many unread mails I have waiting for me, they've actually been sent from a female! If I was gay, well I could probably find a meet 6 times a day, but that's not my flavour! I understand the graft thats involved and the effort that needs to be made if you have any real chance of grabbing the attention of whoever it is your admiring at the time, and of course what one person might like, probably another ten won't, which is why its important to have a sensible profile. My current profile is the product of some quite intense scrutiny and seems to be my most succesful so far. I have tried without any x-rated photo's and all x-rated photo's both of which did'nt really work. I've published quite detailed profiles giving more of an insight into me as a person, what I enjoy, and all the usual stuff, which didn't do too badly, but it seemed to attract the women that are on here to 'make friends' rather than endulge in sexual activity if you get my drift So, there's a mixture up now along with a brief but to the point profile that I feel is adequate enough, and i know that patience is avirtue an'all that, drawing some appreciation but overall still a pretty poor success rate and just wondered what your comments are if you would be kind enough to have a little butchers and offer me your most appreciated advice, negative or positive Hopefully this will help me fine tune my existing profile and attract a bit more attention. So come on, give it to me....do i just come across as a muppet or have I managed to inspire you at all (even if its just a tiny little bit) "Brace Yourself...." Thanks peeps X. All this just for a shag. If I was you just have a wank Hahahahaha true dat !!! Fuck it off mate !!! It's your first message that's counts !!! If you've got decent real life pics of yourself, then the ladies will decide for themselves. Ladies and couples havent got the time to sieve through hundreds of profiles and read them daily !!!!! All my friends I've met on here don't read them. However verifications are a must in my personal opinion to have displayed. You can tell a lot by the people you have met or they have!!! Also tell everyone if your any good at what you claim or not on my profile, which is daft and silly but true " While you do make some good points I disagree that the first message is key. Many women and couples will look at the profile first when they receive a message. If the profile isnt great the message will get binned. Jack | |||
"Clearly many people have issues with preparing their profiles. I for one have found it quite hard work and extremely frustrating when putting out a profile that 'works'. I found it suprisingly simple to offer my advice in earlier posts on saying and displaying the right things in order not to be cringed at or shunned at the first hurdle, yet I'll be the first to admit i've probably contradicted myself numerous times in reflection to my own profile. However, I am comfortable with what i have written and the images i've selected to display and to be honest as long as I'm tactful with my approach when sending a message I do get some responses, but nowhere near what I'd like. On the flip side its very rare I logon to my account and however many unread mails I have waiting for me, they've actually been sent from a female! If I was gay, well I could probably find a meet 6 times a day, but that's not my flavour! I understand the graft thats involved and the effort that needs to be made if you have any real chance of grabbing the attention of whoever it is your admiring at the time, and of course what one person might like, probably another ten won't, which is why its important to have a sensible profile. My current profile is the product of some quite intense scrutiny and seems to be my most succesful so far. I have tried without any x-rated photo's and all x-rated photo's both of which did'nt really work. I've published quite detailed profiles giving more of an insight into me as a person, what I enjoy, and all the usual stuff, which didn't do too badly, but it seemed to attract the women that are on here to 'make friends' rather than endulge in sexual activity if you get my drift So, there's a mixture up now along with a brief but to the point profile that I feel is adequate enough, and i know that patience is avirtue an'all that, drawing some appreciation but overall still a pretty poor success rate and just wondered what your comments are if you would be kind enough to have a little butchers and offer me your most appreciated advice, negative or positive Hopefully this will help me fine tune my existing profile and attract a bit more attention. So come on, give it to me....do i just come across as a muppet or have I managed to inspire you at all (even if its just a tiny little bit) "Brace Yourself...." Thanks peeps X. All this just for a shag. If I was you just have a wank Hahahahaha true dat !!! Fuck it off mate !!! It's your first message that's counts !!! If you've got decent real life pics of yourself, then the ladies will decide for themselves. Ladies and couples havent got the time to sieve through hundreds of profiles and read them daily !!!!! All my friends I've met on here don't read them. However verifications are a must in my personal opinion to have displayed. You can tell a lot by the people you have met or they have!!! Also tell everyone if your any good at what you claim or not on my profile, which is daft and silly but true While you do make some good points I disagree that the first message is key. Many women and couples will look at the profile first when they receive a message. If the profile isnt great the message will get binned. Jack " To be honest your probably right! The more serious and diligent FAB folk will do there research. Point taken onboard thank you and yep time a another re-write | |||
"Contrast on the Posting and the OP's Profile is clear. The Posting is one long long long yawn! Has the OP ever heard of paragraphs to break down the text and make it easily readable? His Profile....? Well, I'd a smile when I saw his comment about his current profile being the product of intense scrutiny! Really? It's only 3 lines!!!!! Quite how he can expect to convey who and what type of person he is, what he seeks and what he has to offer, in only 3 lines, boggles the mind! Flights of fantasy I reckon!" For the record, your opinion means absolutely nothing to me, as it's women I am interested in. Out of everyone who has replied you are the only one who attempts to undermine my intelligence which i find quite offensive. I am fully aware of the lack of paragraphs and immediately looked for the edit option (which i couldn't find, lol) as its not how I would usually type. I posted that from my mobile phone which always comes across in a more sms based format as apposed to now where I am on my laptop. You completely misunderstood what I meant in reference to the scrutiny comment. What I meant was the fact that I have tried different approaches in the way i promote myself. I've tried the more long winded approach (as it clearly states in the OP) and this point was infact the basis of my question. Again, I am fully aware that its a very minimalistic approach - hence, I was simply curious to get the opinions of others on what actually works best for people. If you want to act the smart guy by ridiculing someone based on a comment they make, at least have the decency to address the comment in the context it was intended. Furthermore, I looked up your profile which of course I was hardly suprised to find that your preferred approach is the more long winded type, that quite frankly bored me to tears as it reminded me more of a job application with about as much charisma as chair leg. Whilst this might be more like a career to you, i don't have any plans or needs to elaborate anywhere near the level that you have. In regards to the rest of the comments, as I already mentioned, I agree pretty much with every point made, I was not intending to come across like I was losing sleep over it - I was simply curious to know what people thought. As one comment rightly suggested, I agree totally that the initial message / contact made is a significant factor that could override the profile itself, however it appears. Nobody is going to feel like they know you just by reading your profile, regardless of how extensive you are with the info you provide. Engaging in conversation will provide a much clearer view of someone's personality. One final comment for the classy bird who pointed out that I'd be better off having a wank - FYI sweetheart I engage in masturbation quite frequently, regardless of my activity on here. I also engage in sexual activity quite frequently, aside from my activity here. If I came across in anyway desperate or gave the impression that I was really threatiing over the profile scenario, I apologise for misleading you The ironic thing is these comments have kind of confirmed my point really, about the importance of however way you choose to promote your personal profile, its bloody difficult to come across the way you really intend to, or in a way that reflects your personality as accurately as possible - the truth is, the audience is so diverse that people's opinions of you will be perceived in different ways. End of. Oh, and I nearly forgot to mention when i logged back in a short while ago I had 2 new messages. They were from 2 individual women both saying that they liked my photos and would definately 'go there' - just a shame one is in Birmingham and one in Bristol No need to change my profile, I now know it really doesn't make a difference - Happy Days **DISCUSSION CLOSED** | |||
| |||
| |||
| |||
"***discussion opened back up*** Seriously why do people think there's a good first message? It's attractiveness. Swear.to.god. Just like if you're out in a bar, it's your face that gets you pulled. I don't understand why there's so much effort on profiles. Mines bollocks. Just get some pretty, well done photos up and you'll get noticed op " In retrospect, you are 100% correct. Thanks for simplifying this whole 'taken way out of context' discussion. It's really all it needs..... | |||
"OP, I am sorry but you have blown it. It is hard to take, but you were the one brave enough to ask for advice. But not brave enough to take criticism. You are likely to be on the naughty step for criticising someone else's profile when not requested to do so." DO ME A FAVOUR!!! Brave has nothing to do with it. I have fully embraced and agreed with in most cases eveyone's comments, aprt from when GENGUY decided to attempt to humiliate me based on a comment that he misinterpreted in the first place. I was simply defending that....jeez, whythe hell would you even bother saying that??? I could not give two shits ifI'm going to be punished for commenting on someone else's profile.....i did so because i felt it was appropriate to and i dont need you or anyone else suggesting otherwise.....for fuck sake its like being in school....lol, so so sad!!! | |||
"OP, I am sorry but you have blown it. It is hard to take, but you were the one brave enough to ask for advice. But not brave enough to take criticism. You are likely to be on the naughty step for criticising someone else's profile when not requested to do so. DO ME A FAVOUR!!! Brave has nothing to do with it. I have fully embraced and agreed with in most cases eveyone's comments, aprt from when GENGUY decided to attempt to humiliate me based on a comment that he misinterpreted in the first place. I was simply defending that....jeez, whythe hell would you even bother saying that??? I could not give two shits ifI'm going to be punished for commenting on someone else's profile.....i did so because i felt it was appropriate to and i dont need you or anyone else suggesting otherwise.....for fuck sake its like being in school....lol, so so sad!!! " No favours, I am afraid. You might not have liked the comments received but that does not enable you to criticise other's profiles. Unfair as it may seem, those are the rules. They are there to prevent unpleasantness. Frustrating but understandable. | |||
"***discussion opened back up*** Seriously why do people think there's a good first message? It's attractiveness. Swear.to.god. Just like if you're out in a bar, it's your face that gets you pulled. I don't understand why there's so much effort on profiles. Mines bollocks. Good point, totally get it, people look at our profile for the pics and if they like them contact us, but our big long profile which took some effort is much less effort than answering the questions we get we just say have a read of our profile and if you think we match let's chat a bit more...... Just get some pretty, well done photos up and you'll get noticed op " | |||
"***discussion opened back up*** Seriously why do people think there's a good first message? It's attractiveness. Swear.to.god. Just like if you're out in a bar, it's your face that gets you pulled. I don't understand why there's so much effort on profiles. Mines bollocks. Good point, totally get it, people look at our profile for the pics and if they like them contact us, but our big long profile which took some effort is much less effort than answering the questions we get we just say have a read of our profile and if you think we match let's chat a bit more...... Just get some pretty, well done photos up and you'll get noticed op " I read couples and women's profiles. So I can see if we match. I'm talking about the guys that message me. I won't go through hundreds of profiles reading the text, then looking at the photos. It's photos first. | |||
| |||
| |||