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Seriousness

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

I'm very curious... but have serious questions!

How do you go about safety precautions? How do you guarantee your not meeting a loonatic, how do you guarantee they are "clean". I'm curious but maybe too cautious. Help!!!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Go with your gut instinct

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

The Nutters are crafty, its a lost cause avoiding them

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By *lceeWoman  over a year ago

Leeds

You can't really.

I talk to potential partners a lot first to get a feel for them. I always do social meets first so I can get out if I get a vibe. Use protection.

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By *orkie321bWoman  over a year ago

Nottingham

You can never guarantee someone is "clean". Practising safer sex is the only precaution you can take and have regular tests yourself.

For my own safety i always have a social meet first in a public place like a coffee shop. I do go to clubs and find they are a great place to meet people. A well run club doesn't tolerate the arseholes

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I'm very curious... but have serious questions!

How do you go about safety precautions? How do you guarantee your not meeting a loonatic, how do you guarantee they are "clean". I'm curious but maybe too cautious. Help!!!"

In all seriousness , it's part if the fun not knowing until you meet them

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You can't

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

you can't do any of those things. i've been in a relationship with someone who hid his lunacy really well, lying shit that he was (but good at it).

for safety you could have socials first, it can give you a sense of whether someone would respect you or not.

as for clean, it's up to you to look after your own sexual health in whatever way you deem fit.

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By *MaleMan  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 04/11/16 17:37:35]

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By *MaleMan  over a year ago

Common sense, gut feel, being savvy, suss behavior online.

Sadly even with the latter and more the loons & fruitcakes occasionally get through.

For first, second or more meets (especially one offs) a neutral location etc is wise. Also keeping personal info such as real name, precisely where you live, where you work etc to yourself. With the latter if someone proves to be a fruitcake or nutter they're easier to shake off.

Beyond there it's no different than everyday friendships. Anyone can keep something hidden for a while before they turn and you realise they're a casual weirdo or complete psycho.

In contrast there's plenty of diamond people on the scene.

Enjoy

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By *icecouple561Couple  over a year ago
Forum Mod

East Sussex


"Common sense, gut feel, being savvy, suss behavior online.

Sadly even with the latter and more the loons & fruitcakes occasionally get through.

For first, second or more meets (especially one offs) a neutral location etc is wise. Also keeping personal info such as real name, precisely where you live, where you work etc to yourself. With the latter if someone proves to be a fruitcake or nutter they're easier to shake off.

Beyond there it's no different than everyday friendships. Anyone can keep something hidden for a while before they turn and you realise they're a casual weirdo or complete psycho.

In contrast there's plenty of diamond people on the scene.

Enjoy "

Good advice there.

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By *he Queen of TartsWoman  over a year ago
Forum Mod

My Own Little World

You can't.

Some say they can tell if a person is sane on a social.

I personally choose a club as the safer option, you are surrounded by people if you do chance upon a weirdo.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thank you all for the advise. You guys are always great

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

One bit of advice I would give. Is the second you have the slightest doubt about someone. Don't meet them. Been on and off here and other sites or the last few years. I'm now at that point where the second that little red flag I my mind pops up. I'm not meeting them. Could be something really small. Once the flags up, I'm out!

XX

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By *uckandbunnyCouple  over a year ago

In your bed


"I'm very curious... but have serious questions!

How do you go about safety precautions? How do you guarantee your not meeting a loonatic, how do you guarantee they are "clean". I'm curious but maybe too cautious. Help!!!"

There are no guarantees in life it's all random.

Just manage the chaos as best you can.

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By *reygorCouple  over a year ago

birmingham

if you really want to meet strangers [as most do ]meet at a club .as for std most in the swinging clubs get checked to make it safe as you can .[chams have people come in and you can get checked there ]if the issues that surround this life style are not for you dont play the game.point is we all get in a taxi at 2am thinking we safe but you dont know if the driver has had a drink or drugs but most get you home ok. its life .

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By *achiavellian_adventuresCouple  over a year ago

Basingstoke/Andover

Making it clear up front that you want to verify by phone or by Skype/FaceTime is a great way to pre-filter the weirdos.

When it comes to actually meets we will only meet verified users, in a public place with no promises of anything else unless we completely trust their feedback.

In sum, do your research, trust your instinct and never drop your standards.

Flick xx

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"One bit of advice I would give. Is the second you have the slightest doubt about someone. Don't meet them. Been on and off here and other sites or the last few years. I'm now at that point where the second that little red flag I my mind pops up. I'm not meeting them. Could be something really small. Once the flags up, I'm out!

XX

"

That's a good approach, we are similar.

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By *uckandbunnyCouple  over a year ago

In your bed


"if you really want to meet strangers [as most do ]meet at a club .as for std most in the swinging clubs get checked to make it safe as you can .[chams have people come in and you can get checked there ]if the issues that surround this life style are not for you dont play the game.point is we all get in a taxi at 2am thinking we safe but you dont know if the driver has had a drink or drugs but most get you home ok. its life ."

That's a pretty good idea never thought about that. Std testing at a swingers club.

I know some might find that a mood killer. But we'd probably pop in every now and then.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Usually go for a social meet first before any action.

Ask them questions...test their reactions and set boundaries.

If they don't like you boundaries don't try and meet them half way.

I spoke to a really nice bloke a few months back who seemed really nice. We were on the verge of meeting with my hubby. He asked me about my boundaries and limitations and he wasn't happy and became a nuisance and accused me of being a fake because I wouldn't give him what he wanted.

Always stick to your guns and go with your gut instinct.

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By *ad-GirlWoman  over a year ago

Huddersfield


"I'm very curious... but have serious questions!

How do you go about safety precautions? How do you guarantee your not meeting a loonatic, how do you guarantee they are "clean". I'm curious but maybe too cautious. Help!!!"

Take your time to get to know someone and meet in a public place and always chat on the phone before meeting. (so you have their number) Also if it doesn't feel right end it there politely.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Thanks guys again!! We've really been working on a meet very soon. Being newbies it's exciting yet scary!

We are hoping to find a couple experienced and willing to be patient if needed.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"One bit of advice I would give. Is the second you have the slightest doubt about someone. Don't meet them. Been on and off here and other sites or the last few years. I'm now at that point where the second that little red flag I my mind pops up. I'm not meeting them. Could be something really small. Once the flags up, I'm out!

XX

"

I second this one! Trust your instincts, it's not worth the risk!

Ruby

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By *LUKCouple  over a year ago

Loughborough

On the plus side, mental chicks are dynamite in the sack

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"On the plus side, mental chicks are dynamite in the sack "

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