FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Unverified fem profiles - do you go there?
Unverified fem profiles - do you go there?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Occasionally I get messages from unverified female accounts and I am not sure whether to bother replying. I feel it's too rude to tell them "get verified then I'll talk to you" but I am too distrustful to engage. So I don't, but then I wonder if I am ignoring a woman for no reason - I talk to unverified men and couples so this is not something that bothers me in principle.
Like everyone else, I don't get many women contacting me - which makes me feel like I should be jumping at the oppportunity, but at the same time makes these accounts even more suspicious! What do you do? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I guess everyone deserves a chance to make the good first impression. You can always get an early phone call out of the way to verify that you are indeed dealing with an actual woman. |
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Do they have a PV? Not infallible but better than nothing. Plus as a woman you should know by the tone of the message if you are talking to another woman or not, men rarely get it right when they try faking it 
Or you can ask if they would like you to give them a cam veri if they wanna pop in the chat room for 2 minutes, they don't even have to get naked. Or a phone chat, but I for one never do phone calls or give out my number. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry new to this, are you talking about feedback verification? I haven't met anyone yet but that doesn't mean I'm not serious, just waiting for my interest to be piqued enough to go further!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I met someone who wasn't verified, no profile pics and hardly any profile blurb.
Then met her again, and meeting her next week.
People rely on things too much instead of going with their gut feeling  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is a problem unfortunately - there are a lot of fake "women's" profiles on here and the men behind them can seem convincing at first. There are also genuine women who lie about their interests - actually looking for taboo interest that I find offensive (and are sometimes illegal!)
But just listen to your gut instincts - the genuine ones are worth it, and will just "feel right"...
I also keep a spare cheap pay-as-you-go mobile phone and ask them to call me - that usually shows up who is for real or not!
It's amazing the different excuses that they come up with for why that can't phone right now.... I could write a book...
But give them one chance at least - nearly everyone is worth that... well nearly everyone!
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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have a playphone number , ie a sim card or cheap phone for fab friends.
ask for there number and chat with them ..
when its a bloke cos the fems always out or at work etc etc etc you know its a fake |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Even though I'm straight, I get messages from what are clearly men pretending to be women, you can just tell by the way the profiles and messages are written and what they're asking.
People have to be either photo verified or meeting verified to message me, so I don't trust that a huge amount now. Go with your gut, and don't feel bad about being a bit mistrustful. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Sorry new to this, are you talking about feedback verification? I haven't met anyone yet but that doesn't mean I'm not serious, just waiting for my interest to be piqued enough to go further! "
You're photo verified, and even more importantly you have meaningful text in your profile, and posts on the forums. I am talking about profiles that have neither type of verification and generic material on display.
"I met someone who wasn't verified, no profile pics and hardly any profile blurb.
Then met her again, and meeting her next week.
People rely on things too much instead of going with their gut feeling "
I have met plenty of unverified men and a few couples (other website&previous account). My gut feeling is that these unverified women are suspicious because there is little substance in their profile or messages. But again I have spoken to people who deliberately have extremely little on their profile, yet there's loads to see and enjoy when the curtain opens. I am questioning both my reliance on the verification system and my gut feeling, that's why I ask for advice! Though I think an unverified woman approaching a man is a different dynamic to an unverified woman approaching another woman.
I wouldn't go down the early phonecall route (I don't like calling strangers at the best of times), but offering to cam verify is an interesting idea, thanks! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I met someone who wasn't verified, no profile pics and hardly any profile blurb.
Then met her again, and meeting her next week.
People rely on things too much instead of going with their gut feeling "
you cant beat that gut instinct |
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We kind of judge the profile
Over a few months old with no photo verification we will talk but give nothing away without some for of verification. We have a spare phone we use so our personal numbers are not given out so they can call us and with hold their number....if they won't then cam and if they say they dont have a cam then we assume they are fakes |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
We were contacted by a "nothing" profile last week. Few days of chat on kik, never once asked for rude pics (a good sign) we have spoken more about our wants, her wants, what we all would like to try together/apart, clubs etc.
Face time tonight, social maybe more tomorrow.
Everyone starts somewhere, so I'd just chat, but if they start talking pics/vids or what they want to do to you within half a dozen messages it'll be a guy. Or a very Dom woman maybe
S |
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By *mmmMaybeCouple
over a year ago
West Wales |
Forgot to say in our opinion allow its sometimes the first thing the fakes ask about "Have you got kik"
We do & if your sensible it works just fine thanks & no details are given. If they don't a paygo throwaway sim is perfect. I bought a twin sim smartphone for this very reason, Just lob one sim out stick the next one in..
S |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Occasionally I get messages from unverified female accounts and I am not sure whether to bother replying. I feel it's too rude to tell them "get verified then I'll talk to you" but I am too distrustful to engage. So I don't, but then I wonder if I am ignoring a woman for no reason - I talk to unverified men and couples so this is not something that bothers me in principle.
Like everyone else, I don't get many women contacting me - which makes me feel like I should be jumping at the oppportunity, but at the same time makes these accounts even more suspicious! What do you do?"
Maybe it's different for women but I'd guess most men would reply to anyone. Most men get so few messages they'd be grateful of any interest. I don't think I've ever not replied, even when it's someone out of my area or preferences (even guys). Politeness costs nothing. But then I don't get 50 messages a day.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't meet many men, as I don't seek lots of casual. The men I meet are usually monogamous so to speak for a few months. My first couple of men when I joined were unverified, so couldn't verify me. For almost a year I was unverified, but no fake |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We have seen a lot of this, they always raise suspicion.. Gona be lots of dodgy ppl on sites like this and if you doubt they are who they say they are then avoid for sure.. I'd rather be ignorant to a potential genuine person and be sure of our safety |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Even though I'm straight, I get messages from what are clearly men pretending to be women, you can just tell by the way the profiles and messages are written and what they're asking.
People have to be either photo verified or meeting verified to message me, so I don't trust that a huge amount now."
Wow ok. That's what I am talking about! To make a sweeeeping generalisation I don't think women would proactively message people of an incompatible sexual orientation (whether gay men or straight women) the way men so obviously do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't really pay attention to any single women who message us anymore (friends from the forum being the exception). Whether they are verified or not, most in the past have turned out to either not be women or not be interested in actually meeting if they are women. I've become increasingly cynical.
Our successful meets with single women have primary been at clubs and I don't really see that changing much. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Even though I'm straight, I get messages from what are clearly men pretending to be women, you can just tell by the way the profiles and messages are written and what they're asking.
People have to be either photo verified or meeting verified to message me, so I don't trust that a huge amount now.
Wow ok. That's what I am talking about! To make a sweeeeping generalisation I don't think women would proactively message people of an incompatible sexual orientation (whether gay men or straight women) the way men so obviously do."
I think that's a reasonable generalisation, I tend to think it's only men who are daft enough to think they have a chance of success messaging a straight female profile as a female asking me to send photos |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Occasionally I get messages from unverified female accounts and I am not sure whether to bother replying. I feel it's too rude to tell them "get verified then I'll talk to you" but I am too distrustful to engage. So I don't, but then I wonder if I am ignoring a woman for no reason - I talk to unverified men and couples so this is not something that bothers me in principle.
Like everyone else, I don't get many women contacting me - which makes me feel like I should be jumping at the oppportunity, but at the same time makes these accounts even more suspicious! What do you do?"
I also get very few messages from women and most of these are from unverified accounts
Frankly, I doubt that these messages are from women but suspect they are from 'women' 
I just delete and forget about it. I'd rather not waste my time exchanging messages with someone who is a guy wanking ferociously over his *** splattered screen |
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By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
"Occasionally I get messages from unverified female accounts and I am not sure whether to bother replying. I feel it's too rude to tell them "get verified then I'll talk to you" but I am too distrustful to engage. So I don't, but then I wonder if I am ignoring a woman for no reason - I talk to unverified men and couples so this is not something that bothers me in principle.
Like everyone else, I don't get many women contacting me - which makes me feel like I should be jumping at the oppportunity, but at the same time makes these accounts even more suspicious! What do you do?"
It's a tricky one. When I don't have filters active I do get the occasional message from such accounts. I tend to think 'well I was one of them once' and tend to reply but I am wary. Hope for the best but expect the worst (the worst in this case being a man masquerading as a woman, a single woman who is actually in a couple angling for a threesome to fulfill her bloke's fantasy or someone who isn't sure about the whole lark and only wants to chat. I actually don't mind the latter). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Op u need to chat to them see if they are genuine if you can get them to call you or vice versa u can put your mind at rest maybe swap pics and arrange a meet for coffee |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Occasionally I get messages from unverified female accounts and I am not sure whether to bother replying. I feel it's too rude to tell them "get verified then I'll talk to you" but I am too distrustful to engage. So I don't, but then I wonder if I am ignoring a woman for no reason - I talk to unverified men and couples so this is not something that bothers me in principle.
Like everyone else, I don't get many women contacting me - which makes me feel like I should be jumping at the oppportunity, but at the same time makes these accounts even more suspicious! What do you do?"
Fuck 'em |
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But feeling and general thoughts after chatting generally win the day...this goes for couples who 'may just be a man' too...I think we have been okay so far, but do have the occasional doubts...
In the main we have to realise that this is a great site and most people are straight (as in honest!) and decent (er, as in decent!)
Ray |
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