FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Getting worried and depressed
Getting worried and depressed
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By *ojo1964 OP Man
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Many ladies I know block when they are not interested, it doesn't mean they think you are a stalker or a weirdo. Just stops you coming up on each others searches again and saves time and effort on both sides. While the block button probably was invented as a way to stop stalkers and weirdos, please don't forget people use it in different ways x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
"
Dont let it get you down mate. I regularly block people im not interested in so they dont come up in my searches.
I will agree your profiles quite funny try putting some more pics up. Although being absent minded you may have to return to this post to remind yourself what you were doing while absentlt staring at your camera  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Happens all the time , leave it few weeks go down pub forget about it try agin later half meets are just being in right place at right time
Try wider search locals tend to ignore you after a while |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
"
Please don't take fab personally, it's not real life and definitely not worth getting depressed over. Take it with a pinch of salt. People block people so they don't message again. Try plenty of fish or another site, this site is male top heavy too. Please don't take it too seriously xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
Please don't take fab personally, it's not real life and definitely not worth getting depressed over. Take it with a pinch of salt. People block people so they don't message again. Try plenty of fish or another site, this site is male top heavy too. Please don't take it too seriously xxx"
Funny thing is, l have more women blocked. Haha. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't take fab too serious. Try the real world, you have a better chance to meet someone who will understand you in the real world than here. I guess some of the people blocking you are people you wouldn't even look at or want to know in the real world.
Before you get too depressed look at the man to women ratio on fab |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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prejudice against disabled people? no, i doubt that at all, never heard anyone say disabled people shouldn't be on here.
this place isn't somewhere that you can gain self esteem, for females or males (especially not males probably).
it's a place where people wanna have the least problems possible, the easiest good sex they can get. it's where people come to escape.
if that means blocking people they have no interest in then they will do that.
never presume you've done anything wrong because this place is a place where people are self centred and make the site work for themselves, they aren't here to pity others or please them, they're here for their own selfish reasons and everyone interacting with them (or trying to) need to realise this. |
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welcome to life after 50
if you can call it life
for some reason 50 is seen as the age where men die or become useless at best
think of uncle pete he had his seventyth birthday at chams Some of us still have it and still have along way to go but its not easy |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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People might be afraid and ignorant about what cerebral palsy is and what it's effects on you are......go to a swingers gets club ...socialuse and let people see you have got a personality .....m x |
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Don't try and rationalise others people's thoughts and actions. Only rationalise your own. Trying to rationalise the thoughts and actions of others suggests an inability to cope with life.
Rejection is a part of being on here (especially for single men). If you can't handle rejection swinging is probably not for you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If someone who I have no interest in writes to me...I too often block. It saves us both time and avoids other wasted messages in future.
It's nothing personal. It's just tidy! I've even had a few folks do this to me. Don't worry or over analyse it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
"
In our _iew we are on here for fun with people we are attracted to and would presume that to be true for most, dont want to hear about peoples life story not via a message anyway, maybe if we become friends then you become interested in them, but to but all that in a message before a meet would be a delete from us.
If we are not interested in playing with someone we also then block just to avoid seeing same profiles nothing more  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
"
We remember you from when we were last here may be time for a makeover new pics etc good luck op |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I block. If I get mail from folk I'm not interested in, I block. Not because I think they're stalkers or weirdos, but because it saves getting another message in a week/fortnight, off the same guy again. It''s not personal it''s just using the site tools. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I block when people message me everytime I change my avatar, not noticing that I'm the same person they messaged before and got a no from. It saves them the time and me the aggro.
It's got nothing to do with whether I think they are weird or a stalker.....now the weird stalkers I just shoot
Mrs x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Also having negative status is a massive nope....just saying x"
I block local folk with whiny or annoying status' so they don't appear in my updates page |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There's been lots in the press recently about how social media affects self esteem. We get into a cycle of judging ourselves against others outwardly shiny lives. Add to that the blunting affect that porn can have and it's easy to see how blokes on here get disillusioned with things.
It's a tough environment for blokes, but if you can accept that then carry on. Lots of guys bail out and moan about it. Everyone gets different things out of Fab. If it's not giving you what you want then it's not worth it.
Woah, I almost got deep there!!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why do guys/gals think it's nice to publish they've "been around the block a few times"?"
Surely they can say what they want about themselves? Some might find it crass, others wouldn't care. |
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It's fab, it's not exactly primal instinct, but it is the rejection factory.
For single guys I guess this is far more exaggerated.
If it's making you worry I'd think about having a time out and so you not putting yourself through the mill. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm blind and I get the same sometimes even been accused of making it up to get blokes to feel sorry for me I don't want sympathy just want to be treated normal fed up of being told I'm disabled and shouldn't be on here
Tbh I have more on my block list than my friends it's that bad
Why should I put up with the abuse after all its only my eyes that don't work and it's took me this long to adapt so stop the abuse if you don't like me dont message me simples |
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
"
1) 9 and 10 are comedy gold!
2) I would probably delete "Looks and size are unimportant at all." It may be true for you but I wouldn't say it!
3) I had a hot fling with a woman with CP. We're just friends now but I live in hope...  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm blind and I get the same sometimes even been accused of making it up to get blokes to feel sorry for me I don't want sympathy just want to be treated normal fed up of being told I'm disabled and shouldn't be on here
Tbh I have more on my block list than my friends it's that bad
Why should I put up with the abuse after all its only my eyes that don't work and it's took me this long to adapt so stop the abuse if you don't like me dont message me simples "
you are who you are and ied be happy to meet you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If we get a thanks but no thanks from someone we politely say a thank you for replying, happy fabbing and that we're going to block them so we don't approach them again. I have a head like a sieve for forgetting who we've chatted to for a single/two messages back and forth. Just saves us feeling like we're mistakenly badgering people. |
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
1) 9 and 10 are comedy gold!
2) I would probably delete "Looks and size are unimportant at all." It may be true for you but I wouldn't say it!
3) I had a hot fling with a woman with CP. We're just friends now but I live in hope... "
Yeah, I'd agree with (2). It just comes across as though you'll fuck anything. It may put some ladies off. |
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By *ojo1964 OP Man
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
"I'm blind and I get the same sometimes even been accused of making it up to get blokes to feel sorry for me I don't want sympathy just want to be treated normal fed up of being told I'm disabled and shouldn't be on here
Tbh I have more on my block list than my friends it's that bad
Why should I put up with the abuse after all its only my eyes that don't work and it's took me this long to adapt so stop the abuse if you don't like me dont message me simples "
About 12 months we were going to meet, and still would like to, but something happened and we never did meet. |
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By *ojo1964 OP Man
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
I want to thank every one whose has contributed. Some things I agree and others I may not.
I've edited part of my profile as suggested and new profile will be uploaded by Tuesday night, I may even take a month off too.
Thank You |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Fuck sake fella, if you're taking this place that seriously you need to get off it for a while.
Sorry to be blunt but there's a big wide world out there. Enjoy it |
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As everyone else said don't take it seriously.
And as for blocking don't take that personally. I block guys that I say no to as too many of them come back.
It's a habit not a reflection on the men |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's a sex site....it's not real life....if your not getting what you want from it move on or just enjoy the forums x"
It's certainly not a site to take seriously. |
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By *ojo1964 OP Man
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
Not going to "Name and Shame", but got up this morning with a message, "Just give and leave". This is some of the responses I've had. Even though I'm having a bad time, I know what to do next. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Not going to "Name and Shame", but got up this morning with a message, "Just give and leave". This is some of the responses I've had. Even though I'm having a bad time, I know what to do next. "
Do whatever you want to do.. .it's your life....don't take words of a random that means fuck all....your a grown man... make your own decisions and take this site with a pinch of salt x |
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
"I want to thank every one whose has contributed. Some things I agree and others I may not.
I've edited part of my profile as suggested and new profile will be uploaded by Tuesday night, I may even take a month off too.
Thank You "
Oh I can DEFINITELY recommend taking breaks. I've already had a few over my short swinging "career". Recharge, rethink, return. Happy swinging, mate!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Most just block to stop you coming up in searches if they are not interested. Just look at it as it saves you the bother of contacting them again. Don't let a stranger blocking you get you down"
Yes, exactly this. Don't take it personally. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We block if we aren't interested and have had more than one email from one guy. Mrs tends to attempt to reply to all messages but sometimes it's easier just delete and blocking if it's the 2nd, 3rd or 4th time we've heard first messages from men. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Taking a break is very good advice. I've done it twice and my profile is currently hidden.
Another option you could consider.
Saying harsh things isn't going to help at all people. You'd be better off not commenting.
Implying he should grow up isn't helpful to someone who's struggling.
He needs positivity not further criticism.
Try and ignore the unhelpful replies. Take more photos and have a break. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have same disability as you. I have met some great guys and then some that block you at the very mention that I have a disability.
It hard... knock backs to not damage you confidence. You just have to be resilient. There are people here in the same boat
Good luck with FAB |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
"
My advice would be that.
1. There's a lot of people on FAB who won't like you, but some who will.
2. Being persistant and the ability to carry on despite rejection is one of the keys to being sucessful on this site.
3. I would take notice when you're being rejected, what are your intial messages and profile like? Is there anything you could change to become more sucessful?
4. You could leave this site, does being on this site enhance your life, or are you just chasing a dream? Personally I like a busy site, and would like more people to sign up, and stay members - However if this site does not work for them they are better off forgetting it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I've been on FAB over 6 years. I've even got verifications published. I've not meet anyone in the last 2 and a half years.
My profile is witty and funny and when I write to someone I make it light, funny and honest. I tell people that I suffer from Cerebral Palsy, explain that everything works.
I've been round the block a few times and I know how this game works. I also worked in full time employment for 27 years, until recently.
But when I do write I'm finding that I just get deleted, which is fine, I can handle that but what hurts the most I get blocked, I'm not a stalker or a weirdo.
Can I ask are people on here that prejudiced on FAB, or should I take no notice and just carry on? Or should just give up and leave the site? Any advice please. Thank you.
"
If it's upsetting you that much id leave. |
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