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Couple seeking advice
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up!  |
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By *GHertsCouple
over a year ago
North Herts |
Visiting a club is probably your best bet, most clubs have social areas where you can meet and get to know people, without any pressure or obligation to play, before moving through to the play areas if you all want to.
That's how we've met people we've played with so far and it's worked just fine.
See you're in Bucks so there are a few choices not too far away, I'd personally recommend The Vanilla Alternative which is the club we go to most, and is classy and has a great social area, but have heard good things about AbFabs (near Heathrow) too.
Mr G |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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when we first started playing with others about 4 years ago now - we started out as soft play only - talk to couples about what you really want - i had already played with women so our situation a little different - you could try a club and chat to couples there - never any pressure to play - |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're similar to you having had only mmf meets so far but would like to try a mmff meet but with an understanding couple with no pressure and some patience. "
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Almost the same thing here we recently added couples to our wish list  but unfortunately don't seem to get much interest when we mention how slow we would like to take our first experience, we love the social side of things and have had a couple of meets with guys but still nothing with a couple. A club might be the best idea but but again would probably find it a little uncomfortable in new surroundings with complete strangers that's why we would alway like to just have a social drink on the first meet. As its been said there is probably someone for everyone just waiting for the right couple but can't help but think who's going to want to have a very soft night play with a couple of newbees after reading some of your fab story's |
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Try going to a local social? You're much more likely to meet genuine people and no pressure to play there and then. You can talk and explain your situation/preferences and everyone will know where they stand before things progress any further. Xx |
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It's great to see that we're not alone in the go slow!
We've been playing at clubs for over a year but have yet to 'progress' beyond the watch / be watched stage. To be honest, that's enough of a kick for us if that's as far as it goes.
The best nights we've had have been where we haven't arranged to meet up with anyone at a club for a social and have just gone to play in the open rooms by our selves. We usually have a few couples come join us in the big bed to play with their partners and to watch us. We've made a few good friends that way |
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There are couples who soft swing. Even experienced couples.
It can be trickier with couples thought as it's 4 people who have to like each other and that can be harder.
Try a club plenty of couples go and play on their own just enjoying the atmosphere and the exhibitionism. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up! "
Don't give up no no no! We had same start as you....now we have several good friends for regular couple meets and have had lots of fun at clubs too. This is what we did......1) exchange face pics and initial info about likes, dislikes, pace and boundaries
2) chat on phone fem to fem
3) chat on phone all 4
4) social meet near by to club so we can go play if all happy
5) kiss, stroke, fondle, watch with own partner.....take it further gradually.
Hope you have fun soon. M x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up! "
I am sorry I am a little confused.
You say you want to meet a couple and have not been with a woman before. But you want to be watched/or watch. As a bi woman in a couple I would not want to watch or be watched by amother couple. Maybe you should look for a soft swap couple. The fems can play with no male involvement at all. Maybe oral between both couples but no full swap. It will allow you to experience the girl on girl your looking for x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up!
I am sorry I am a little confused.
You say you want to meet a couple and have not been with a woman before. But you want to be watched/or watch. As a bi woman in a couple I would not want to watch or be watched by amother couple. Maybe you should look for a soft swap couple. The fems can play with no male involvement at all. Maybe oral between both couples but no full swap. It will allow you to experience the girl on girl your looking for x"
Yes, echo that.....we started with soft swing meets and even now after many meets we chose to play soft swing quite often......very erotic. Must say though....as a bi lady I am totally happy ending watched as a first meet.....but of course I am a total exhibitionist!
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up!
I am sorry I am a little confused.
You say you want to meet a couple and have not been with a woman before. But you want to be watched/or watch. As a bi woman in a couple I would not want to watch or be watched by amother couple. Maybe you should look for a soft swap couple. The fems can play with no male involvement at all. Maybe oral between both couples but no full swap. It will allow you to experience the girl on girl your looking for x"
Hi thank you for replying. Sorry I wasn't clear. I'm straight. I haven't see hubby play with another woman so don't want to rush to that stage. Hence the own partner watching / being watched stage. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up!
I am sorry I am a little confused.
You say you want to meet a couple and have not been with a woman before. But you want to be watched/or watch. As a bi woman in a couple I would not want to watch or be watched by amother couple. Maybe you should look for a soft swap couple. The fems can play with no male involvement at all. Maybe oral between both couples but no full swap. It will allow you to experience the girl on girl your looking for x
Hi thank you for replying. Sorry I wasn't clear. I'm straight. I haven't see hubby play with another woman so don't want to rush to that stage. Hence the own partner watching / being watched stage. "
I would definitely try soft swap then. If tour partner is unable to see you with a woman in this situation she would not be able to mentally cope seeing you in a full swap situation. We have done full swaps with couples, had females join us. But never just a male because Andy doesn't know how he would feel. So I have never pushed it x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up!
I am sorry I am a little confused.
You say you want to meet a couple and have not been with a woman before. But you want to be watched/or watch. As a bi woman in a couple I would not want to watch or be watched by amother couple. Maybe you should look for a soft swap couple. The fems can play with no male involvement at all. Maybe oral between both couples but no full swap. It will allow you to experience the girl on girl your looking for x
Hi thank you for replying. Sorry I wasn't clear. I'm straight. I haven't see hubby play with another woman so don't want to rush to that stage. Hence the own partner watching / being watched stage.
I would definitely try soft swap then. If tour partner is unable to see you with a woman in this situation she would not be able to mentally cope seeing you in a full swap situation. We have done full swaps with couples, had females join us. But never just a male because Andy doesn't know how he would feel. So I have never pushed it x"
The only way to know how one feels us to try it.
Before trying anything though you must have a secure relationship.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Time , effort , communication , social meet first , pre - filth cooling off period "
Thank you - good advice. It's what we have done prior to mmf meets usually |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Time , effort , communication , social meet first , pre - filth cooling off period
Thank you - good advice. It's what we have done prior to mmf meets usually "
Doesn't sound like you are doing much wrong X |
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That's how we started now we play mmf or couple play . But we now find it easier to meet couples at party's and clubs , two clubs quite close to Bedford we use Jaydees , but also VA very close but have not tried there yet |
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There are plenty of couples who are happy with soft swapping, you should search for these on here, who have been well verified, and who look like they match you.
Arrange to meet these people in an environment that you feel comfortable with.
You can also chat and meet couples in a club environment. Just chat in the bar and explain what you are looking for.
In a club you can easily play at the level you are happy with. If eventually you both want to go a little further and have discussed it with each other beforehand , you can do a little more.
For example, we recently met a new couple by chance in the pool at a club and did exactly this. We just played side by side and the girls played gently while the male halves stayed with our own partners. In that environment you can go a little further if and when it suits you.
Lots of couples in clubs will do this happily and without pressure with you. It is still a great sexy experience for everyone.
Have fun and progress at your speed xx |
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By *ewbies7Couple
over a year ago
north west |
Hi
We very new but find going to clubs is by far the best way. There are lots of couples there willing to talk and pass on tips,we have made some good friends already in the short time we have been doing it. |
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By *GHertsCouple
over a year ago
North Herts |
"Thank you all for your advice- very helpful and encouraging! Perhaps we should give VA a visit!  "
As I said earlier would definitely recommend VA, one thing I forgot to mention, which is a bonus is the play areas are all open, so watching/being watched is easily done without fear of being encroached on. Would suggest a Saturday though as that is couples only and you won't have the possibility of being pestered by single guys (who are only allowed Friday nights) on your first visit....unless of course that's what you want!!
Oh and the first Friday of the month is Bi Night so best avoided unless it's your thing.
Mr G |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up! "
Don't give up! Not sure why you seem to be too worried after all you've played with single guys, not having played with a lady before, obviously your guy won't have any issue there and what you do with a lady is always open to discussion There are plenty of couples out there, don't think that it would be best to pick a new couple we'd say the exact opposite. X
Now clubs could be the way forward and in our opinion Liberty Elite would be your best bet, it has lots of open play areas, hot tub etc but had the added benefit of closed rooms too xx always worth a PM if you want to chat xx |
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By *izzy.Woman
over a year ago
Stoke area |
Interesting how everyone seems to assume you are bi. The idea of going to a club is ideal. You can chat to people and there is no pressure to play. You can play with your own partner alongside another couple, or soft play. If you swap details with people you meet, you can then spend more time away from the club chatting and arrange to meet privately or another time at the club.
Trying g to find another local couple that both M and F of both couples are happy to meet via fab is tricky. At a club you can say yes or no to your partner with a look.
No pressure. Just go and meet people and see how it goes. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Interesting how everyone seems to assume you are bi. The idea of going to a club is ideal. You can chat to people and there is no pressure to play. You can play with your own partner alongside another couple, or soft play. If you swap details with people you meet, you can then spend more time away from the club chatting and arrange to meet privately or another time at the club.
Trying g to find another local couple that both M and F of both couples are happy to meet via fab is tricky. At a club you can say yes or no to your partner with a look.
No pressure. Just go and meet people and see how it goes. "
Thank you Lizzy. Thank you for taking the time to reply |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up! "
Simply suggest a social..that's what we do,and if all are that attracted and horny then play the same day..if not have a drink and laugh and set something up for a latter date |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Was thinking perhaps you should try to get to know more experienced couples, especially if you are having trouble with fakes. When we started playing with couples at parties a year and a half ago it was the experienced ones who helped us enormously, especially with me and my first few girl on girl experience. I think it would all have been very awkward if everybody had been new. |
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"Hi thank you for replying. Sorry I wasn't clear. I'm straight. I haven't see hubby play with another woman so don't want to rush to that stage. Hence the own partner watching / being watched stage. "
I would suggest a club for doing this for the first time. There is no pressure and if you start to feel even the slightest bit uncomfortable with watching your hubby play with another woman, it's easy to stop and walk away - no embarrassing conversation needs to be had. Go slow and take it one step at a time. I felt "odd" watching Paul kiss and play with another woman to start with....the last time we went he was having his cock sucked by another woman & I was totally okay with it...I just wanted to join in with her   |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"We were wondering if we could have some advice from the more experienced of you out there? We are still pretty new to the scene, couple of MMF meets which were great. However, we would now like to meet with a couple. We have not played with a lady before and would therefore like to take it slowly initially...watching / being watched and progressing from there. The social side is fun for us too. We are afraid that more experienced couples will be put off by us, so have been chatting to new couples (and hence unverified). The problem we have found is that most disappear overnight, tend to be fake profiles or time wasters. We haven't been to a club but starting to wonder if that might be a solution, but we tend to like to get to know people first before we play.
Any advice would be gratefully received! Perhaps we should give up!
Simply suggest a social..that's what we do,and if all are that attracted and horny then play the same day..if not have a drink and laugh and set something up for a latter date "
.
Thank you. Yes that is our plan. The struggle we are having is that we are looking for new couples like us who are often unverified and they disappear off the site / fake profiles etc.... So my question was more about finding a couple into soft swing who aren't fakes or time wasters. But agree a social first, once found someone you like, is a good plan!! |
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