FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Disheartened
Disheartened
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I am getting fed up of the time wasters and let downs had too many recently. Looking for a regular playmate nothing too serious with no strings do they really exist and where are they. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We always said that we didnt want to be the type of swingers that made friends and just swung within that foursome, or go on holiday with people for swinging etc. We always wanted variety and didnt really want to keep playing with the same people.
But there does seem to be an influx of guys and couples that Im not sure are completely genuine. I think the idea appeals but the reality of being with a couple is very daunting. Guys seem to approach us then after a few messages start ignoring Chris and just asking for me and asking if Ill meet alone etc. Why message a couple if you dont want the two of them involved. Anyway we have made friends with an absolutely wonderful couple and through them another couple, and we have a few favourite single guys and because we know we wont get messed around with these people, we have recently just remained with a select few  |
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By *eaboMan
over a year ago
marden |
i find it easier to play with a few 'regulars' than trying to constantly find new people. I know i won't get messed around and If they do cancel i know its genuine. I have introduced some of them to here and the stories they tell me are truly comical. I also don't get too upset if someone from here does turn out to be a waste of time because i am not totaly reliant on the site for fun. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I am a single girl and would love to hook up with a guy for more than one night not asking to get married or anything but would be nice to go to parties more and would love to explore the social side of swinging more. |
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There are still plenty of great people on here!
It's a about networking and go out of your way to meet new people at clubs/ parties and socials. Don't just hang out with your regular friends. I go to events and am always surprised at the new people I meet and where it leads and to whom.
Sometimes are great and some aren't but you always need to believe that there is something great around the corner! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am getting fed up of the time wasters and let downs had too many recently. Looking for a regular playmate nothing too serious with no strings do they really exist and where are they."
Think its hard to find someone who ticks all the boxes isnt it but there are some great guys on here who would love a swing partner |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am getting fed up of the time wasters and let downs had too many recently. Looking for a regular playmate nothing too serious with no strings do they really exist and where are they."
Think its hard to find someone who ticks all the boxes isnt it but there are some great guys on here who would love a swing partner |
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"We always wanted variety and didnt really want to keep playing with the same people"
We held the same view, however, it would be nice to have “regular” peeps to play with, plus, why is it sex is always better 2nd time round  |
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"I am a single girl and would love to hook up with a guy for more than one night not asking to get married or anything but would be nice to go to parties more and would love to explore the social side of swinging more."
You don't need a bloke to be social,and if you go out and meet ppl the fuckbuddy you seek might be there,
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I do get to socials ps we having one 9th April but would be nice not to go as a single now and again theres nothing lonlier than being in a room full of loved up couples. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We know exactly where you are coming from, we have come across so many people, and I include couples in this, who promise the earth and turn out to be a complete timewasters, rude or a let down. We too would like to have just a few people we can rely on and do repeat meets with, people like that are like gold dust but there are one or two! |
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"There are still plenty of great people on here!
It's a about networking and go out of your way to meet new people at clubs/ parties and socials. Don't just hang out with your regular friends. I go to events and am always surprised at the new people I meet and where it leads and to whom.
Sometimes are great and some aren't but you always need to believe that there is something great around the corner!"
this is so true what you have said, We have started going to clubs, and Munches, and getting to know so many people, and it is great fun, Dont give up looking, there are some real genuine guys on here, I know I found one. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Have faith it takes time to meet someone who will fill that space and you will meet some arseholes on your search but there is some genuine people on here so don't give up just yet!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I shy away from any gent's profile that says "looking for a regular playmate", as it comes across as needy to me.
Don't know why, however, it gives me the impression that the person is seeking a playmate to play exclusively with him. Hence the neediness.
Can't deal with needy people!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We always wanted variety and didnt really want to keep playing with the same people
We held the same view, however, it would be nice to have “regular” peeps to play with, plus, why is it sex is always better 2nd time round "
I must admit it is nice to have a few "closer" playmates. We didnt set out to ever make friends as we wanted a different adventure every time and meet lots of new people. But we happened to meet a great couple and it suits us as we see each other probably once every 3 months so its not too samey |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like the sound of having a girls group, a gang of girls hitting the clubs, looking out for each other, able to sit together and have a laugh and a drink, but also be able to go and play when they want |
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we had alot of timewater on here but how can you spot them out for the real people who want to meet up we was going leave the site cause of the timewaster but thou why should all these timewaster stop us been on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"we had alot of timewater on here but how can you spot them out for the real people who want to meet up we was going leave the site cause of the timewaster but thou why should all these timewaster stop us been on here "
verifications..like the site makes it easy to stop you being drawn in by idiots!!
anyone new like a newbie as some like to call them ,we just ask for a number to call them on and they miraculously dissapear....simples!! |
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"I like the sound of having a girls group, a gang of girls hitting the clubs, looking out for each other, able to sit together and have a laugh and a drink, but also be able to go and play when they want "
yeah!!! i think thats a great idea!!! i often get really shy if i go to clubs on my own so going with a group of girl friends would be great for me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like the sound of having a girls group, a gang of girls hitting the clubs, looking out for each other, able to sit together and have a laugh and a drink, but also be able to go and play when they want
yeah!!! i think thats a great idea!!! i often get really shy if i go to clubs on my own so going with a group of girl friends would be great for me "
.
Are we talking about invading another club with our glorious presence?
Which one do you have in mind and when please? |
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"I am getting fed up of the time wasters and let downs had too many recently. Looking for a regular playmate nothing too serious with no strings do they really exist and where are they."
I so wish I lived nearer to you. Are all the men blind in you area? Can they not see how sexy you are? Anybody who messes you about is a fool. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am getting fed up of the time wasters and let downs had too many recently. Looking for a regular playmate nothing too serious with no strings do they really exist and where are they."
yes they do exist.
but i do understand your situation. i do not understand people who promise meets and keep you in reserve and go to meet others.
all you can do in just ignore these type of people and not respond to them.
why give them anymore of your time?
please do not give up. your a fine lady and im sure things will turn around soon.
good luck, take care xx |
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By *evilwolfCouple
over a year ago
Leicestershire |
I think an awful lot are caught up in the expectation, than the eventuality. I am singularly unimpressed with photo collectors who have appeared in numerous guises, and others who give very positive nods, then when it comes to putting the cards on the table, suddenly disappear... just a little disappointing, still we all evolve filters to deal with such situations...
Away from the persistant pests, and 'manipulators' there's probably a wealth of genuine people looking for regular connections (and I don't interpret that as needy as in an earlier message, but instead as reliable), and I know we certainly look forward to meeting those when they decide to call on us
best of luck
A xx |
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By *ruitWoman
over a year ago
near kings lynn |
I seem to go from wanting to have some regular friends to play with but also liking the ability to be my own person and them not then deciding who I will meet.
I have found to be honest that the meets I have had havent worked for me in some ways so wouldnt meet them again. its lovely to be asked if there is a second meet possible but normally its because it hasnt quite worked for me.
Mind you a week to myself next week so now making plans to be naughty |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I seem to go from wanting to have some regular friends to play with but also liking the ability to be my own person and them not then deciding who I will meet.
I have found to be honest that the meets I have had havent worked for me in some ways so wouldnt meet them again. its lovely to be asked if there is a second meet possible but normally its because it hasnt quite worked for me.
Mind you a week to myself next week so now making plans to be naughty"
well youve always been a nice women _ruit. naughty you is much better  |
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By *omis.69Man
over a year ago
Birmingham |
People seem to generalise that it's men that are timewaters! Ok percentage wise you maybe correct but trust me us genuine single guys also have our fair share of timewasters and cancelled meets!
I guess to a certain extent there is no hard and fast answer( no pun intended) but some people do ruin it for the genuine ones out here!!
Rant over lol!!  |
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"I like the sound of having a girls group, a gang of girls hitting the clubs, looking out for each other, able to sit together and have a laugh and a drink, but also be able to go and play when they want
yeah!!! i think thats a great idea!!! i often get really shy if i go to clubs on my own so going with a group of girl friends would be great for me
.
Are we talking about invading another club with our glorious presence?
Which one do you have in mind and when please? "
Any lol quite fancy the lodge in glos mainly cos its close lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" some people do ruin it for the genuine ones out here!!
"
Totally disagree. Then again I don't believe one bad apple spoils the whole barrel either...if you pick it out! I'm able to filter out wheat from the chaff pretty easily - not encoutered a timewaster yet, so it can be done!
When I was meeting I only met single men - and a very lovely bunch they were too! |
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I wish i knew how to prove to the lovely ladies on here im serious. I have 2x the problem meeting because im automatically filtered out of a lot of ladies/couples choices because of the choice ive made to play away. This is understandable but at the same time ive encountered a few time wasters and have yet to arrange a successfull meet.
This is a shame as i know i have a lot to offer a partner/couple (no im not a donkey, i just know how to use what i have) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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i live in the far south west and do meet when i say i will but it is hard for a single male as well , particularly in my age bracket, although i am fit and up for most things. would prefer people to say no rather than have you travel then call it off at the last minute.However there are some great people here and it is worth the hassle when you find them. mmmm The Lodge sounds fun, is it???? |
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I have it on my profile that i prefer regular meets to one of's. Which i do. But you can never know whether a meet is going to be a one off or not.
For me, the reason i prefer regular meets is because you get to know each other sexually and the trust forms.
The club scene isnt for Jay, thats why on here im on as a single woman, go to clubs as a single woman. Ive never wanted to go to a club as part of a "buddy couple" ive done it once with a guy that ive known along while as he had never been to a club and wanted to see what it was like.
I would feel restricted, think that id have to stay with them. I like to go off on my own chat to people, play with people without having to give a second thought to someone else. |
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I have to say I find it highly amusing that a regular has posted about timewasters and not immediately been shouted down.
Most of the posters who have commented in support here, regularly tell anyone else who dare mention the timewasters word how they've never come across one in all their time here. Or how about the old "maybe you should change your selection process" line. Haven't seen that one yet either.
Interesting really.
*Her* |
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