FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Do looks count?
Do looks count?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Personally i think i look a bit naff so not confident in clubs... Not sure if it"s all about looks? Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personality can sometimes win over looks. If you get chatting, and build up a rapport with some people, they may invite you to play. I'm not sure I would appreciate someone touching my thigh without being invited to... But that may just me my personal preference.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Personality can sometimes win over looks. If you get chatting, and build up a rapport with some people, they may invite you to play. I'm not sure I would appreciate someone touching my thigh without being invited to... But that may just me my personal preference. "
Well.. Yea, thought it was a bit weird.. Lol, was aguy in the club |
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By *ugby 123Couple
over a year ago
Forum Mod O o O oo |
"Personally i think i look a bit naff so not confident in clubs... Not sure if it"s all about looks? Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
I wouldn't take the advice of touching as good advice, you might get a slap.
Yes looks are important, I am guessing you wouldn't have sex with someone you didn't fancy, but, everyone has different taste, there will be someone who will like the look of you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"... Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
In the States it may get you thrown out, in addition to the slap. VERY bad taste.
You need to talk to the ladies. Build a rapport. You need to engage their mind before they'll consider engaging their body. If you're nice, but they're not interested, they may introduce you to someone who is. --but it may not be that night.
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By *otgirl32Woman
over a year ago
Ashton Under Lyne |
"... Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts?
In the States it may get you thrown out, in addition to the slap. VERY bad taste.
You need to talk to the ladies. Build a rapport. You need to engage their mind before they'll consider engaging their body. If you're nice, but they're not interested, they may introduce you to someone who is. --but it may not be that night.
"
Best advice. I've slept with guys who were average to look at but amazing to talk to (and fuck!)
xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Going from the single public pic you have up you're not a monster so show a few more 
Go to clubs, best place to make first contact is the bar area and maybe approach a couple and ask them straight if they would be interested in having you to join them sometime later.
Like it's been said, don't just touch without asking.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Looks seem to mean everything on this site. Doesnt matter if you have a great personality and banter. If the photo doesnt appeal, then you dont get past first base. My looks seem to count against me. Im not ugly, but yesterday a couple was put off because apparently I look like Harry Hill? Bald with specs seems not to do me any favours it seems.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Looks seem to mean everything on this site. Doesnt matter if you have a great personality and banter. If the photo doesnt appeal, then you dont get past first base. My looks seem to count against me. Im not ugly, but yesterday a couple was put off because apparently I look like Harry Hill? Bald with specs seems not to do me any favours it seems. "
I know what you mean about getting past first base. Sounds familiar lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally i think i look a bit naff so not confident in clubs... Not sure if it"s all about looks? Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
First off as previous advice, don't touch with an invite or asking first.
As far as looks go it's all subjective on who people find attractive. I would say most of us guys don't have the looks to turn heads. So make sure you make an effort, good clothes, aftershave, well presented and polite. Chat to anyone you can and get a rep for being a gent, not a creepy perv  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Looks seem to mean everything on this site. Doesnt matter if you have a great personality and banter. If the photo doesnt appeal, then you dont get past first base. My looks seem to count against me. Im not ugly, but yesterday a couple was put off because apparently I look like Harry Hill? Bald with specs seems not to do me any favours it seems.
I know what you mean about getting past first base. Sounds familiar lol"
Yeh.. its the fact that fems and couples on here can afford to be that picky and choosy. The site is inundated by males. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Going from the single public pic you have up you're not a monster so show a few more
Go to clubs, best place to make first contact is the bar area and maybe approach a couple and ask them straight if they would be interested in having you to join them sometime later.
Like it's been said, don't just touch without asking. "
Haha.. admit it.. you had a look to see if I really do look like Harry Hill? Well.. no I dont. But I have been compared to Ade Edmondson..or any other bald man with specs on the planet. Lmao. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
Whoever told you this is an idiot. As said before get talking to a lady/ couple first otherwise a decent club would have you thrown out. |
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"... Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts?
In the States it may get you thrown out, in addition to the slap. VERY bad taste.
You need to talk to the ladies. Build a rapport. You need to engage their mind before they'll consider engaging their body. If you're nice, but they're not interested, they may introduce you to someone who is. --but it may not be that night.
Best advice. I've slept with guys who were average to look at but amazing to talk to (and fuck!)
xx"
I'm looking to be that guy!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There two categories of guy I sleep with (and have mind-blowing sex with both) - The first is the eye candy - gorgeous with a very hot body - no further explanation needed!
The second is a less attractive guy who clearly takes care of his diet/exercise but is no Adonis- but has 'something about them' (nice eyes and smile for instance) and a great personality!
If you can't be in category A (I'm bloody not!) - then make sure you're in category B op!
And forget the touching advice - the guy who advised you was an idiot!! It's assault on a train carriage - and assault in a club! Xx |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts?
Whoever told you this is an idiot. As said before get talking to a lady/ couple first otherwise a decent club would have you thrown out. "
yea i thought it was dodgy advice.. Was just checking it over with you people  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think all clubs are the same whereby going straight in to cop a feel is not the done thing. As for do looks count there has to be some physical attraction but also personality goes a long way. We have been lucky in that guys have been respectful and understood when we explained we are only looking for ladies. Only once did someone push it in the jacuzzi and then proceeded to follow us outside and sat wanking. We just ignored him and left him sat there like Billy no mates  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Personally i think i look a bit naff so not confident in clubs... Not sure if it"s all about looks? Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
Looks are nothing more than an initial attention grabber. The guys who get invited to join us are the ones who come over to chat to get to know us in the bar not the ones who try to attract our attention while we are playing. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes looks matter. They're not the be all and end all, and you can compensate with other characteristics. "
Very true.
For example in a club if there was a gorgeous couple who we really fancied who were being loud, obnoxious etc. This would totally put us off playing with them.
Had it plenty of times where someone who didn't immediately blow me away thinking, wow she is absolutely stunning!
After spending time with them really started to turn me on and see them in a different light. |
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"Yes looks matter. They're not the be all and end all, and you can compensate with other characteristics.
Very true.
For example in a club if there was a gorgeous couple who we really fancied who were being loud, obnoxious etc. This would totally put us off playing with them.
Had it plenty of times where someone who didn't immediately blow me away thinking, wow she is absolutely stunning!
After spending time with them really started to turn me on and see them in a different light. "
Second that big time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Looks certainly help with the initial attraction but if when they open their mouth they turn out to be a complete twat they could look like George clooney but I still wouldn't want to "
I'm with you on that one!! X
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In club situation I would not be happy with someone just touching me without being invited to do so and physical attraction is important for us. However everyone's idea of attraction is different. Hope you enjoy your future club visit's. Xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes looks matter. They're not the be all and end all, and you can compensate with other characteristics.
Very true.
For example in a club if there was a gorgeous couple who we really fancied who were being loud, obnoxious etc. This would totally put us off playing with them.
Had it plenty of times where someone who didn't immediately blow me away thinking, wow she is absolutely stunning!
After spending time with them really started to turn me on and see them in a different light. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Looks are all that matters, the amount of knock backs I get is unbelievable really.
It doesn't matter how funny, charming or engaging you are.
The thing is, those knocking me back aint no picture either. ..lols
So, what do you do? Keep trying! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Yeh.. its the fact that fems and couples on here can afford to be that picky and choosy. The site is inundated by males.
Or the fact they don't fancy you."
Well thats the point im making. How can you actually tell just by looking at a photo wether you fancy somebody or not. People on here are very quick to judge based on a photo. Attraction comes from looking at a person and interaction with them. A site like this takes all that away. The amount of occasions when ive been told im nothing like my photos..in a positive sense.. I have lost count of. |
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"Personality can sometimes win over looks. If you get chatting, and build up a rapport with some people, they may invite you to play. I'm not sure I would appreciate someone touching my thigh without being invited to... But that may just me my personal preference. "
(thumb |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personality/character/charisma/enigma/energy all of this and yet still people get tied into looks. I've been in the un stimulating company of blindingly beautiful yet equally dim people before and it's a real cold fish man. Fuck ego - spirit wins every time for me x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Yeh.. its the fact that fems and couples on here can afford to be that picky and choosy. The site is inundated by males.
Or the fact they don't fancy you.
Well thats the point im making. How can you actually tell just by looking at a photo wether you fancy somebody or not. People on here are very quick to judge based on a photo. Attraction comes from looking at a person and interaction with them. A site like this takes all that away. The amount of occasions when ive been told im nothing like my photos..in a positive sense.. I have lost count of. "
It's a great starting place though and you get a pretty good idea from a picture if someone is physically attractive to you. I don't have to meet everyone to tell that i don't find the way they look physically attractive enough to want to have sex with them....and there aren't enough hours in the day to meet people on the off chance that they might look better in the flesh. If people consistently say you don't look anything like your photos, might i suggest taking some more where you do? |
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Looks will definitely give one a head start coz that's the 1st thing people see,it's definitely not everything coz tastes differ and iv seen some stunning women with guys who resemble fossils,so they must be doing something that works for them and id never touch up any woman at a club or party without some kind of conversation unless I know her....it's all about respect no matter what x |
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"Personality/character/charisma/enigma/energy all of this and yet still people get tied into looks. I've been in the un stimulating company of blindingly beautiful yet equally dim people before and it's a real cold fish man. Fuck ego - spirit wins every time for me x"
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"Personally i think i look a bit naff so not confident in clubs... Not sure if it"s all about looks? Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
Iam with you there mate iam no brad pitt but every one I have played with I have got on with and had a laugh how it has happend with me is walking about and went in to a room and they was playing looked at me I was in shock my 1st time said sorry was going to walk away and they said it was ok so I stayed and watched then joined but I under stand I find it hard to know to join or not
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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No, looks do not matter one bit.
Personality is everything, social skills are the way.
Personally, when I used to be'normal' if a guy could hold a 2-way conversation that was they direct way to my fun-slide! (Today I just go sit on a cock but that's because I'm grumpy and becasue I can)
As everybody else have said, don't ever, ever just touch her thigh, never touch without asking! Even I wouldn't just sit on a cock without asking its owner first.  |
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By *aeBabeWoman
over a year ago
London |
"There two categories of guy I sleep with (and have mind-blowing sex with both) - The first is the eye candy - gorgeous with a very hot body - no further explanation needed!
The second is a less attractive guy who clearly takes care of his diet/exercise but is no Adonis- but has 'something about them' (nice eyes and smile for instance) and a great personality!
If you can't be in category A (I'm bloody not!) - then make sure you're in category B op!
And forget the touching advice - the guy who advised you was an idiot!! It's assault on a train carriage - and assault in a club! Xx"
This for me too
There are some lovely guys who don't fit into either category and those are just the people I don't fancy, but would be happy to talk to. Friends?
Definitely ask. I have screamed once now at someone who touched my upper inner thigh, cheeky place to start an initial touch. Permission is key to being in the good books of people and clubs. |
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"Personally i think i look a bit naff so not confident in clubs... Not sure if it"s all about looks? Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
As a straight man how would you like a male stranger to come and stroke your thigh uninvited as you are fucking someone else?
Not sure who gave you that advice but they are way off base.
Some people need to watch the cup of tea concent video.
Google it. |
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"Personally i think i look a bit naff so not confident in clubs... Not sure if it"s all about looks? Been told to sit near others playing and touch a womans thigh but seems too strong. I prefer to ask. Any thoughts? "
You should always ask before touching....and for us it's not about looks....it's the glint in the eyes that does it for me |
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