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Very frustrated guy needs you Ladies to advise me on what I am doing wrong please.

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

Ladies, what am i doing or saying wrong. I am a genuine gentleman who is polite and honest but finding it difficult to get responses.

example of my initial message.

Hello XXXX hope you are well today, I am Dave a nurse who has recently moved to Camberley, I am a genuine guy who knows how to treat a lady with a cheeky side that loves to please, I'd love to chat see how we get on and take things from there, I am looking for like minded ladies for mutual safe fun.

is being to nice wrong as i cant be that treat them mean keep them keen guy.

i dont send cock pics I normally send 3, one in a suit, one topless showing that i have a tattoo or 3 and a normal pic.

advice would be gratefully received. Many thanks True gent

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham

Your message, although ok, is obviously a copy & paste message and gives no hint at all that you've read the person't profile.

And I've never met a genuine person who had to tell me they were

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

From a guys point of view.

Best is to read the profile, if you have something with common interest bring that up, easy to read message with a hint of charm.

Remember they'll be receiving plenty of messages from others

If you are what they are looking for they'll message you back and you can chat more.

Avoid copy and pasting messages and you'll soon find women with common interests

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

although I agree that it does read like it is copied and pasted it is not, that is an example, when i read someones profile I will take things from it and apply it to my message showing that I have read it, but if i am honest it is what I would generally write, I do not know what else to put. I am not going to send a message like "fancy a meet tonight" or "Hello beautiful wanna fuck" as I think that would be just rude, i am seriously asking what catches a ladies eye.

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By *r H and Good PetCouple  over a year ago

Nottingham

Unfortunately, "being nice" isn't the sole requirement to get a response on here.

People like knowing that whoever is messaging them wants to meet *them*, and hasn't just sent out 100 of the same messages to get a response.

I love how so many guys' thought processes seem to be: "OK, I'm being nice on here, and it's not working" and then instead of "Well, maybe try something different", it's "Maybe I need to be *less* nice!"

Lol.

Since when is being less nice ever a good move? Lol

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By *r H and Good PetCouple  over a year ago

Nottingham


"I am not going to send a message like "fancy a meet tonight" or "Hello beautiful wanna fuck" as I think that would be just rude, i am seriously asking what catches a ladies eye.

"

Yeah, no one is telling you to write that either, so I don't even know why you're mentioning it. Lol.

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By *inglehotchickWoman  over a year ago

blackpool

Have to agree with the other posters I hate copy and paste messages

When someone makes a point of something I've put on my profile I respond. Also compliments work for me xx

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

BBCBull as i have just mentioned to the lady before, I dont copy and paste and if there is something in their profile I will bring some commonality in too my message but getting frustrated with no response. I know I must sound like a sad git

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Try maybe having some public pics when i get a message before i even open it i go straight to the profile and have a nosey

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

apologies some of my friends mention they get that alot, dont get me wrong i am here for serious advice I'm sory if it seems like I am making assumptions.

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By *hetalkingstoveMan  over a year ago

London

I'd edit down that profile text. You mention wining and dining twice and it's all a bit repetitive.

And saying you're genuine is pointless. That's something you have to demonstrate, not just claim.

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"BBCBull as i have just mentioned to the lady before, I dont copy and paste and if there is something in their profile I will bring some commonality in too my message but getting frustrated with no response. I know I must sound like a sad git "

Ok then, even as an example your messages are all about you, not about the person you are messaging.

Though do not put in false compliments.

I agree with some pics in your profile and, for me, your text is too long.

Everyone on here thinks they are a genuine true gent. If you are you don't need to mention it, it will be apparent

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By *r H and Good PetCouple  over a year ago

Nottingham


"Try maybe having some public pics when i get a message before i even open it i go straight to the profile and have a nosey"

This^ No photos to look at would also put me off.

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"apologies some of my friends mention they get that alot, dont get me wrong i am here for serious advice I'm sory if it seems like I am making assumptions. "

I don't think you were

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"I'd edit down that profile text. You mention wining and dining twice and it's all a bit repetitive.

And saying you're genuine is pointless. That's something you have to demonstrate, not just claim."

Snap sort of

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Many people will read profile before opening a message... Maybe look at that...

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

Thank you for the advice, I will re-look at my profile, you make some very good points and i appreciate them. It is great to hear a blokes perspective.

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

thank you also for your input, i am really pleased i have asked you all have been really helpful.

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

Ladies and Gents, 5 minutes on here and i have received some honest and great advice, I am going to give my profile a revamp and try again, Happy swinging x

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham

Oh and would you meet a 99 year old?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Don't really need to mention what you do and by normal picture do you mean face picture? As without that, I would delete your message without even reading it

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

that is a very good point lol as someone who has done elderly care I dont think so lol

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover

yes all my pictures are face pictures. Again thank you for your advice also it really is helping me look into how I message ladies

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Try maybe having some public pics when i get a message before i even open it i go straight to the profile and have a nosey"

Agree with this x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Patience is the key

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham

And hit +quote before replying so we know who you're responding to

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By *rue gent78 OP   Man  over a year ago

Andover


"And hit +quote before replying so we know who you're responding to "

Thank you, I am certainly learning this evening, xx

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"And hit +quote before replying so we know who you're responding to

Thank you, I am certainly learning this evening, xx"

Which is good I'm sure no one on here minds helping someone who genuinely wants to improve their chances by doing things 'right'

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By *iceshortsMan  over a year ago

South East


"Unfortunately, "being nice" isn't the sole requirement to get a response on here.

People like knowing that whoever is messaging them wants to meet *them*, and hasn't just sent out 100 of the same messages to get a response.

I love how so many guys' thought processes seem to be: "OK, I'm being nice on here, and it's not working" and then instead of "Well, maybe try something different", it's "Maybe I need to be *less* nice!"

Lol.

Since when is being less nice ever a good move? Lol"

Been trying to tell you what I would like to do if we met for a few days but I just age out on your profile. Can you email me so I can tell you x

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By *r H and Good PetCouple  over a year ago

Nottingham


"Been trying to tell you what I would like to do if we met for a few days but I just age out on your profile. Can you email me so I can tell you x "

WTF?! Those age filters are up for a reason.

I'm not interested in "what you would like to do to me if we met for a few days".

And contacting me like this is creepy as fuck.

Don't do this, OP. This is a good example of what not to do.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Ladies, what am i doing or saying wrong. I am a genuine gentleman who is polite and honest but finding it difficult to get responses.

example of my initial message.

Hello XXXX hope you are well today, I am Dave a nurse who has recently moved to Camberley, I am a genuine guy who knows how to treat a lady with a cheeky side that loves to please, I'd love to chat see how we get on and take things from there, I am looking for like minded ladies for mutual safe fun.

is being to nice wrong as i cant be that treat them mean keep them keen guy.

i dont send cock pics I normally send 3, one in a suit, one topless showing that i have a tattoo or 3 and a normal pic.

advice would be gratefully received. Many thanks True gent

"

Try keeping it short n sweet with a wee bit of cheeky banter.....maybe something bout one of their pics x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Only message people if you fit their profile and remember many women don't want to be wined and dined. They don't want a potential stalker they want to be taken and used and never speak again. This isn't a dating site. Find out what they want, read their profiles,act out their fantasies and move on. If they want a regular fb or relationship they will say but most of all be nice and respectful. Even when you are fucking them in the arse and sending them home to hubby. Good luck.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Your profile reads like a looking for love and, and also, now brace yourself for this, maybe they just aren't attracted to you?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Most women will look at a profile without even opening a message. Couple of public profile pictures would help, profile text is way too long and has a few grammatical errors in it.

This would be a message that I would delete without opening it. Nothing on the profile piques my interest.

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By *urvymamaWoman  over a year ago

Doncaster


"Been trying to tell you what I would like to do if we met for a few days but I just age out on your profile. Can you email me so I can tell you x

WTF?! Those age filters are up for a reason.

I'm not interested in "what you would like to do to me if we met for a few days".

And contacting me like this is creepy as fuck.

Don't do this, OP. This is a good example of what not to do. "

It's also against forum rules to try to get around blocks and filters by contacting them on the forum

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By *r H and Good PetCouple  over a year ago

Nottingham


"Been trying to tell you what I would like to do if we met for a few days but I just age out on your profile. Can you email me so I can tell you x

WTF?! Those age filters are up for a reason.

I'm not interested in "what you would like to do to me if we met for a few days".

And contacting me like this is creepy as fuck.

Don't do this, OP. This is a good example of what not to do.

It's also against forum rules to try to get around blocks and filters by contacting them on the forum "

Oh yeah. ^This.

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By *urvymamaWoman  over a year ago

Doncaster


"Been trying to tell you what I would like to do if we met for a few days but I just age out on your profile. Can you email me so I can tell you x

WTF?! Those age filters are up for a reason.

I'm not interested in "what you would like to do to me if we met for a few days".

And contacting me like this is creepy as fuck.

Don't do this, OP. This is a good example of what not to do.

It's also against forum rules to try to get around blocks and filters by contacting them on the forum

Oh yeah. ^This. "

And yet he chose to approach that way yet according to his pof olé he's a "nice guy" , which kinda plays into the posts from kinky minx

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By *ordonBennettMan  over a year ago

dover

Delete all the nonsense in your profile about your tongue...lots of guys spout on about how marvellous their oral skills are and believe they have a gift not shared by others....they just sound desperate....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"although I agree that it does read like it is copied and pasted it is not, that is an example, when i read someones profile I will take things from it and apply it to my message showing that I have read it, but if i am honest it is what I would generally write, I do not know what else to put. I am not going to send a message like "fancy a meet tonight" or "Hello beautiful wanna fuck" as I think that would be just rude, i am seriously asking what catches a ladies eye.

"

you have to just keep plodding away its very frustrating for guys on here ,6 locations seem a little ambitious though are you after a woman in every port ?

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By *ordonBennettMan  over a year ago

dover


"

And saying you're genuine is pointless. That's something you have to demonstrate, not just claim."

I quite agree with this.

Saying you're honest, or nice, or genuine is utterly pointless and as often as not its mention is regarded as suspicious at best....all three adjectives need to be demonstrated by deeds not words

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By *eavenscentitCouple  over a year ago

barnstaple


"Only message people if you fit their profile and remember many women don't want to be wined and dined. They don't want a potential stalker they want to be taken and used and never speak again. This isn't a dating site. Find out what they want, read their profiles,act out their fantasies and move on. If they want a regular fb or relationship they will say but most of all be nice and respectful. Even when you are fucking them in the arse and sending them home to hubby. Good luck. "

This made me laugh and some of it is actually correct.

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By *eavenscentitCouple  over a year ago

barnstaple


"

And saying you're genuine is pointless. That's something you have to demonstrate, not just claim.

I quite agree with this.

Saying you're honest, or nice, or genuine is utterly pointless and as often as not its mention is regarded as suspicious at best....all three adjectives need to be demonstrated by deeds not words"

I dont want nice, I want a hot dirty fuck

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By *at69driveMan  over a year ago

Hertford


"Ladies, what am i doing or saying wrong. I am a genuine gentleman who is polite and honest but finding it difficult to get responses.

example of my initial message.

Hello XXXX hope you are well today, I am Dave a nurse who has recently moved to Camberley, I am a genuine guy who knows how to treat a lady with a cheeky side that loves to please, I'd love to chat see how we get on and take things from there, I am looking for like minded ladies for mutual safe fun.

is being to nice wrong as i cant be that treat them mean keep them keen guy.

i dont send cock pics I normally send 3, one in a suit, one topless showing that i have a tattoo or 3 and a normal pic.

advice would be gratefully received. Many thanks True gent

"

You have a lengthy profile , but it does not really tell us anything about you . What are you key marketing points that will make you stand out . Without pictures on a profile , most members would be non starters.

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By *ordonBennettMan  over a year ago

dover


"

And saying you're genuine is pointless. That's something you have to demonstrate, not just claim.

I quite agree with this.

Saying you're honest, or nice, or genuine is utterly pointless and as often as not its mention is regarded as suspicious at best....all three adjectives need to be demonstrated by deeds not words

I dont want nice, I want a hot dirty fuck "

There you go.....an even more compelling reason not to go on about being nice....

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A message that indicates they've read my profile really catches my eye.

A message that indicates they've sent the same thing to every other person in my area doesn't.

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman  over a year ago

Burbage


"Ladies, what am i doing or saying wrong. I am a genuine gentleman who is polite and honest but finding it difficult to get responses.

example of my initial message.

Hello XXXX hope you are well today, I am Dave a nurse who has recently moved to Camberley, I am a genuine guy who knows how to treat a lady with a cheeky side that loves to please, I'd love to chat see how we get on and take things from there, I am looking for like minded ladies for mutual safe fun.

is being to nice wrong as i cant be that treat them mean keep them keen guy.

i dont send cock pics I normally send 3, one in a suit, one topless showing that i have a tattoo or 3 and a normal pic.

advice would be gratefully received. Many thanks True gent

"

Looks like a copy n paste message, messages should be unique and show that you have read her profile, by mentioning what it is on her profile that led you to messaging in the first place.

I get so many guys messaging me saying they read my profile and want to chat, i know instantly all they have done is looked at pics, these men claiming they read the profile usually bald/shaven headed, bearded, miles away and send cock pics but no face pics, and get arsy when its pointed out they should read the profiles they have claimed to read.

Your best to fully read a profile, make sure you tick all the boxes that the profile is asking for, then write a tailored message and send your three pictures.

Also, get to organised socials or clubs, that cuts out all the messaging and its the best way to put yourself across to others in a face to face conversation

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman  over a year ago

Burbage


"BBCBull as i have just mentioned to the lady before, I dont copy and paste and if there is something in their profile I will bring some commonality in too my message but getting frustrated with no response. I know I must sound like a sad git "

You also mentioned that in honesty most of your messages are like your example message which led me to believe from that response you made that the example message is the message you send out, surely if you reference there profiles you would have included in your example message "after reading your profile i felt we were compatible as a match because xyz

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman  over a year ago

Burbage


"Unfortunately, "being nice" isn't the sole requirement to get a response on here.

People like knowing that whoever is messaging them wants to meet *them*, and hasn't just sent out 100 of the same messages to get a response.

I love how so many guys' thought processes seem to be: "OK, I'm being nice on here, and it's not working" and then instead of "Well, maybe try something different", it's "Maybe I need to be *less* nice!"

Lol.

Since when is being less nice ever a good move? Lol

Been trying to tell you what I would like to do if we met for a few days but I just age out on your profile. Can you email me so I can tell you x "

Why would you need to tell someone whose profile you obviously dont match if you cant message because of there filters, thats a little "desperate" in my view

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman  over a year ago

Burbage


"Ladies, what am i doing or saying wrong. I am a genuine gentleman who is polite and honest but finding it difficult to get responses.

example of my initial message.

Hello XXXX hope you are well today, I am Dave a nurse who has recently moved to Camberley, I am a genuine guy who knows how to treat a lady with a cheeky side that loves to please, I'd love to chat see how we get on and take things from there, I am looking for like minded ladies for mutual safe fun.

is being to nice wrong as i cant be that treat them mean keep them keen guy.

i dont send cock pics I normally send 3, one in a suit, one topless showing that i have a tattoo or 3 and a normal pic.

advice would be gratefully received. Many thanks True gent

Try keeping it short n sweet with a wee bit of cheeky banter.....maybe something bout one of their pics x"

If someone messaged me focussing the message on my pics, that would say only looked at your pics, couldnt be arsed to read your profile, which would put me off the bloke instantly

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By *ordonBennettMan  over a year ago

dover


"BBCBull as i have just mentioned to the lady before, I dont copy and paste and if there is something in their profile I will bring some commonality in too my message but getting frustrated with no response. I know I must sound like a sad git

You also mentioned that in honesty most of your messages are like your example message which led me to believe from that response you made that the example message is the message you send out, surely if you reference there profiles you would have included in your example message "after reading your profile i felt we were compatible as a match because xyz"

Another good example where self-declaration of being "genuine" is not to be trusted...

the profile is also repetitive and does other guys down ..."not like other guys", etc.,....which is not a good look at all

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman  over a year ago

Burbage


"Only message people if you fit their profile and remember many women don't want to be wined and dined. They don't want a potential stalker they want to be taken and used and never speak again. This isn't a dating site. Find out what they want, read their profiles,act out their fantasies and move on. If they want a regular fb or relationship they will say but most of all be nice and respectful. Even when you are fucking them in the arse and sending them home to hubby. Good luck. "

Can i ask where your stats are from to prove most women on this site want to be taken and used

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Think he meant taken to his place and used as a domestic goddess

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By *irty Girty From No 30Woman  over a year ago

Burbage


"Think he meant taken to his place and used as a domestic goddess "

No he meant we all want to be taken and used, yet funnily enough from profiles on here and females i know from the club scene i have never yet come across a female looking to be solely taken and used

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Good luck OP.

If you take all the advice on this thread you'll be obliged to send a perfctly crafted message mentioning the interests of the recipient in a nice/not so nice manner, whilst being all things to all people in your own profile.

Just be totally honest about who you are and what you are looking for - and still be prepared to be ignored the vast majority of times. Meeting people cold through this site is not easy for most single men, and it can take time and a lot of effort to get started,

Try a social or a club and get your face known in the local community.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Think he meant taken to his place and used as a domestic goddess

No he meant we all want to be taken and used, yet funnily enough from profiles on here and females i know from the club scene i have never yet come across a female looking to be solely taken and used"

I've seen a few women ask for that scenario but no-one should generalise and respect should always be shown

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

You're a single man trying to meet only single women . One of zillions and very vanilla. Many want what they can't get from conventional man / woman scenarios from Fab

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By *rightonsteveMan  over a year ago

Brighton - even Hove!

It's easy. No pics = no contact = no meet.

No matter how well constructed the message, if the profile lacks something, then it's goodbye Vienna.

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By *inky-MinxWoman  over a year ago

Grantham


"And yet he chose to approach that way yet according to his pof olé he's a "nice guy" , which kinda plays into the posts from kinky minx "

You mean that if he was nice he wouldn't have to say?

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By *manda63Woman  over a year ago

Southampton


"Ladies, what am i doing or saying wrong. I am a genuine gentleman who is polite and honest but finding it difficult to get responses.

example of my initial message.

Hello XXXX hope you are well today, I am Dave a nurse who has recently moved to Camberley, I am a genuine guy who knows how to treat a lady with a cheeky side that loves to please, I'd love to chat see how we get on and take things from there, I am looking for like minded ladies for mutual safe fun.

is being to nice wrong as i cant be that treat them mean keep them keen guy.

i dont send cock pics I normally send 3, one in a suit, one topless showing that i have a tattoo or 3 and a normal pic.

advice would be gratefully received. Many thanks True gent

"

Sorry to say but when I saw how long your profile text was I stopped reading before I got halfway. Some public pics would be good too. Good luck Maria

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By *w214Couple  over a year ago

Wirral


"Try maybe having some public pics when i get a message before i even open it i go straight to the profile and have a nosey"

This.

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