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Confused.com
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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So, I chatted to a guy on here and got on really well. We got on equally as well in person and the sex was fantastic.
He messaged regularly, the last messages being last weekend, commenting on how much I turned him on, how he really enjoyed playing with me, how he was looking forward to exploring with me etc.
We organised to spend Wednesday afternoon in bed together but then, on Monday he cancelled saying he was manic in work. He stops messaging and generally goes AWOL.
On the Friday after we were supposed to have met he gets his first verification.
I messaged Friday night to see if he was still interested in playing to avoid making a fool of myself and he responds on Saturday apologising for not being in touch but he's been ill and confined to his sofa for 2 whole days. However, he manages to tell me he is no longer interested in playing with me.
If it is the case that he was ill, this means he gained his verification from a meet on the Wednesday afternoon, when I was supposed to be meeting him but which he cancelled. The verification referred to afternoon drinks.
I know that he is free to see who he chooses and that things crop up and meets have to be cancelled sometimes but I don't understand the complete sea change from being all gushing about how good we were to deciding that he'd rather not play any more.
The term 'mixed signals' is so appropriate here. Am I missing something? |
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I personally think he is turning you when he can't get another meet. Maybe you have made yourself too available, or maybe he is threatened by feeling too close. When I met guys one to one as a single fem I closed down when I felt they were getting too close, and then they were history, no matter how much I liked them because I needed to keel it nsa. I think you should move on before he gets in your head too much ... just my personal opinion. I wouldn't necessarily think he is playing games deliberately |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Guessing you were his first meet ?
That being the case , he was bound to be very keen to begin with .
He's met someone else who is now his latest thing and he doesn't want to see you anymore . It's the nature of the game . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So, I chatted to a guy on here and got on really well. We got on equally as well in person and the sex was fantastic.
He messaged regularly, the last messages being last weekend, commenting on how much I turned him on, how he really enjoyed playing with me, how he was looking forward to exploring with me etc.
We organised to spend Wednesday afternoon in bed together but then, on Monday he cancelled saying he was manic in work. He stops messaging and generally goes AWOL.
On the Friday after we were supposed to have met he gets his first verification.
I messaged Friday night to see if he was still interested in playing to avoid making a fool of myself and he responds on Saturday apologising for not being in touch but he's been ill and confined to his sofa for 2 whole days. However, he manages to tell me he is no longer interested in playing with me.
If it is the case that he was ill, this means he gained his verification from a meet on the Wednesday afternoon, when I was supposed to be meeting him but which he cancelled. The verification referred to afternoon drinks.
I know that he is free to see who he chooses and that things crop up and meets have to be cancelled sometimes but I don't understand the complete sea change from being all gushing about how good we were to deciding that he'd rather not play any more.
The term 'mixed signals' is so appropriate here. Am I missing something?"
hey beautiful this is a common thing on here people move on ,no loyalty ,no feeling ,no manners some can handle it some can't ,I personally hate it ,NSA is what it says on the can Not Sexy At-all      |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I personally think he is turning you when he can't get another meet. Maybe you have made yourself too available, or maybe he is threatened by feeling too close. When I met guys one to one as a single fem I closed down when I felt they were getting too close, and then they were history, no matter how much I liked them because I needed to keel it nsa. I think you should move on before he gets in your head too much ... just my personal opinion. I wouldn't necessarily think he is playing games deliberately "
Yes, this makes sense. I'm happy to move on, we'd only met twice so we'd not developed any sort of friendship. I think I'm just baffled at going from one extreme to the other. I'm a respectful person and suppose I just expect others to be equally as respectful in return.
Oh well, onwards and upwards  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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in your mind think 'fuck off loser',then dust yourself down and find yourself another gorgeous bloke asap!  .PS:in the 'notes' box next to his profile,just put 'wanker'. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"in your mind think 'fuck off loser',then dust yourself down and find yourself another gorgeous bloke asap! .PS:in the 'notes' box next to his profile,just put 'wanker'. "
Haha I like how you think...a lot. Consider it done |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"From my experience of men their replies to a yes/no question are:
Yes = Yes
Anything else = No but I haven't got the balls to tell you."
Yes, it does appear to be the case. It's a pity isn't it? I'm much better with honesty.
Oh well, onwards and upwards  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"...I know that he is free to see who he chooses...
This is all you need to know...
Yes. Curious that you didn't verify him though "
I tend not to verify people unless they ask. He never asked or suggested he'd like one. Nothing more sinister than that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I verify. I don't make them ask. They can always hide it if they want "
I respect your choice to do that. We're all different, that's what makes fab so fun and interesting |
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"I verify. I don't make them ask. They can always hide it if they want
I respect your choice to do that. We're all different, that's what makes fab so fun and interesting "
Yes. It's just great to hear someone (male) is making the site work for them and meeting without veris. He's met at least 2 women without a veri.
Next time a bloke posts about can't get verified I can change my advice slightly
I always thought the first veri was the most important. Guess not so much |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The term 'mixed signals' is so appropriate here. Am I missing something? hey beautiful this is a common thing on here people move on ,no loyalty ,no feeling ,no manners some can handle it some can't ,I personally hate it ,NSA is what it says on the can Not Sexy At-all
Oh I can handle it, just wish he'd said rather than making all sorts of excuses. I'm big enough and ugly enough to handle the truth...when it's offered. I suspect he just didn't want to seem like the bad guy but honesty is always the best policy.
It sooo isn't. Maybe it is for a sane person like you but there are some people you should change phone number, address, name (via deed poll) and profile before rejecting
Oh crikey, sounds like you may have had a rough time in the past "
I think most men have a horror story about a woman, who in her opinion, has been scorned |
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Wait until you get screwed over fella dn then you will understand some bitterness as some folks purely enjoy being nasty to others. We get it in our line of work when they make room bookings and don't turn up and of course the card is a fake so we lose out twice.
Oh yes there are some pure charmers on the web.
L2 |
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