FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > I can't seem to meet any one
I can't seem to meet any one
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hey fab is a frustrating place you're going to have to go through much worse before it gets better one tip though don't always lead with sex ,sex site or not a lot of women not all find it a turn off ( am sure I will be corrected on that one )  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey fab is a frustrating place you're going to have to go through much worse before it gets better one tip though don't always lead with sex ,sex site or not a lot of women not all find it a turn off ( am sure I will be corrected on that one ) "
Hate it when people just go on about sex, makes them look desperate and i either stop talking to them or block them depends what they said. |
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Wide slaves and 3 sons?
Have a proof read of your profile, and try and get a little more of what you are looking for, likes, dislikes etc. you cannot accom so what kind of meets are you after, hotel? Club? Their place? Etc |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"[Removed by poster at 29/08/15 16:39:30]don't ask how they are. That never seems to get a reply "
Usually because all you can answer that with is fine thanks, you? To which you normally get a similar reply like I'm good too and that's the end of the conversation!! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Thank you I have just changed it thanks for advice "
if thats what you have changed it to.... its all "I" "I" "I"
beside from having expectations that are far from reality let me ask you a question...
if i was a couple or a single lady how would I know that I was for you.....
the answer is you wouldn't (you don't mention them at all) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thank you I have just changed it thanks for advice "
Not much you haven't. Try a spell check and say something about yourself. I will retire from this thread and wish you the best of luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey fab is a frustrating place you're going to have to go through much worse before it gets better one tip though don't always lead with sex ,sex site or not a lot of women not all find it a turn off ( am sure I will be corrected on that one )
Hate it when people just go on about sex, makes them look desperate and i either stop talking to them or block them depends what they said."
I am a gent never talk about sex until the lady brings the subject up but fab is a fickle world so easy to say the wrong this or have ambiguous text messages read in the wrong way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey fab is a frustrating place you're going to have to go through much worse before it gets better one tip though don't always lead with sex ,sex site or not a lot of women not all find it a turn off ( am sure I will be corrected on that one )
Hate it when people just go on about sex, makes them look desperate and i either stop talking to them or block them depends what they said.
I am a gent never talk about sex until the lady brings the subject up but fab is a fickle world so easy to say the wrong this or have ambiguous text messages read in the wrong way "
True. It's really hard to flirt on here sometimes in case what you said becomes an open invitation to dirty chat or something else as well. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well being a women and choosing the right profile is important. If you have a profile that doesn't say anything about you and what you want it will be skipped by! Dirty talk isn't for fab. It isn't about sex its so much more and it isn't about the size of your cock or how fit you are. Perhaps it would be good to start reading other men's profiles to get more on yours. If you are just wanting a fuck then ur in the wrong place.
Wish you luck A xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"[Removed by poster at 29/08/15 16:39:30]don't ask how they are. That never seems to get a reply
Usually because all you can answer that with is fine thanks, you? To which you normally get a similar reply like I'm good too and that's the end of the conversation!!"
It shouldn't be the end of the conversation.
We all manage to develop conversations from these traditional openers in real life. Why do people see it as a problem here?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"[Removed by poster at 29/08/15 16:39:30]don't ask how they are. That never seems to get a reply
Usually because all you can answer that with is fine thanks, you? To which you normally get a similar reply like I'm good too and that's the end of the conversation!!
It shouldn't be the end of the conversation.
We all manage to develop conversations from these traditional openers in real life. Why do people see it as a problem here?
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Doing other things whilst logged on, chatting to other people on the site at the same time. In real life the person is there in front of you with facial expressions, tone of voice and gestures, on here its just typed words on a screen that you can come back to and have to be interesting to keep people chatting. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Doing other things whilst logged on, chatting to other people on the site at the same time. In real life the person is there in front of you with facial expressions, tone of voice and gestures, on here its just typed words on a screen that you can come back to and have to be interesting to keep people chatting."
That's all fine, in real life is quite possible that you'll greet people that are distracted or have to be somewhere else soon.
What I struggle to understand is why some people appear to be offended by the simplest of conversational opening gambits. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Doing other things whilst logged on, chatting to other people on the site at the same time. In real life the person is there in front of you with facial expressions, tone of voice and gestures, on here its just typed words on a screen that you can come back to and have to be interesting to keep people chatting.
That's all fine, in real life is quite possible that you'll greet people that are distracted or have to be somewhere else soon.
What I struggle to understand is why some people appear to be offended by the simplest of conversational opening gambits."
I wouldn't worry about people like that, I wouldn't want to meet someone so seemingly highly strung and easily offended! |
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
"[Removed by poster at 29/08/15 16:39:30]don't ask how they are. That never seems to get a reply
Usually because all you can answer that with is fine thanks, you? To which you normally get a similar reply like I'm good too and that's the end of the conversation!!
It shouldn't be the end of the conversation.
We all manage to develop conversations from these traditional openers in real life. Why do people see it as a problem here?
"
Quick basic example:
Person A: How are you?
Person B: Fine.
Now the question is how is how is person B?
Maybe not the greatest of examples but a couple of points to bear in mind:
1) Non verbal communication accounts for about two thirds of the message we are trying to get across.
2) Women tend to get it more than men, especially when it comes to the "dating game"!
Hope this helps... |
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"
Doing other things whilst logged on, chatting to other people on the site at the same time. In real life the person is there in front of you with facial expressions, tone of voice and gestures, on here its just typed words on a screen that you can come back to and have to be interesting to keep people chatting.
That's all fine, in real life is quite possible that you'll greet people that are distracted or have to be somewhere else soon.
What I struggle to understand is why some people appear to be offended by the simplest of conversational opening gambits."
I don't get offended, but I have a detailed profile, (when visible), no ambiguity as to what I'm looking for and offering.
In my experience the conversation goes like this.
Him: How are you?
Me: Fine thanks.
Him: Free to chat?
Me: Yes.
Him: So what you into?
The end.
Variations, I'll say what I'm into is on my profile. To which it'll be so what you gonna do to me then hun/babe?
The end.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Quick basic example:
Person A: How are you?
Person B: Fine.
Now the question is how is how is person B?
Maybe not the greatest of examples but a couple of points to bear in mind:
1) Non verbal communication accounts for about two thirds of the message we are trying to get across.
2) Women tend to get it more than men, especially when it comes to the "dating game"!
Hope this helps..."
Sounds like person B is a bit conversationally challenged.
How about:
Person A: Hour are you?
Person B: I'm great thanks, the sun is shining, I've got the day off and I'm just about to head out for a few beers at my local 
How about you? |
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By *ee VianteWoman
over a year ago
Somewhere in North Norfolk |
"
Quick basic example:
Person A: How are you?
Person B: Fine.
Now the question is how is how is person B?
Maybe not the greatest of examples but a couple of points to bear in mind:
1) Non verbal communication accounts for about two thirds of the message we are trying to get across.
2) Women tend to get it more than men, especially when it comes to the "dating game"!
Hope this helps...
Sounds like person B is a bit conversationally challenged.
How about:
Person A: Hour are you?
Person B: I'm great thanks, the sun is shining, I've got the day off and I'm just about to head out for a few beers at my local
How about you?"
You may reply that way to a friend but not to a total stranger.
I'm fine, thanks is the stock reply when someone you don't know asks how you are.
In most cases they don't actually care, they're usually doing it to be polite or because they want something. It's the same here. They aren't asking because they care; it's just a mechanism to try to start a conversation. It's a very uninspiring way to try to start an exchange of messages.
Using something that will engage the other party so they want to answer is far better. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"If they can't manage a coherent sentence in response to a simple question it's likely to be a waste of time writing much more  "
You could argue the same about the person who sent the first how are you message. Sometimes logging on to 20 plus messages I'd say over half are how are you messages. Perfectly acceptable message, perfectly acceptable in the real world face to face but on here, its unlikely to get a response. |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"If they can't manage a coherent sentence in response to a simple question it's likely to be a waste of time writing much more "
If someone can't find something interesting to say to me after 'reading my profile' and all they can come up with is 'Hi how are you'? Then they are seriously lacking in social skills and therefore are not for me.
It really isn't rocket science now is it?  |
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By *ilk_TreMan
over a year ago
Wherever the party is! |
"
Quick basic example:
Person A: How are you?
Person B: Fine.
Now the question is how is how is person B?
Maybe not the greatest of examples but a couple of points to bear in mind:
1) Non verbal communication accounts for about two thirds of the message we are trying to get across.
2) Women tend to get it more than men, especially when it comes to the "dating game"!
Hope this helps...
Sounds like person B is a bit conversationally challenged.
How about:
Person A: Hour are you?
Person B: I'm great thanks, the sun is shining, I've got the day off and I'm just about to head out for a few beers at my local
How about you?"
If someone in r/l replied with the word "fine", that would only be a third of the message. Just by looking at them you would understand a lot more about whether this person is really is "fine" or if they have something else going on in the background.
I doubt if you would assume they were "conversationally challenged" just from the verbal communication alone... |
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"If they can't manage a coherent sentence in response to a simple question it's likely to be a waste of time writing much more
If someone can't find something interesting to say to me after 'reading my profile' and all they can come up with is 'Hi how are you'? Then they are seriously lacking in social skills and therefore are not for me.
It really isn't rocket science now is it? "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So what is a good message to send? I would think it impolite to start talking about a persons profile before atleast starting off with a hello,and how are you? If it's not rocket science, then just give an example. After all communication is created between people, not a code one person has to crack. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It is often recommended in the Forums to act the same as you do in real life when you are interacting with people .e.g at a club to be friendly and polite....Often in real life, it is common to open a conversation with new people with " Hi, how are you"...So what not in here?... |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"So what is a good message to send? I would think it impolite to start talking about a persons profile before atleast starting off with a hello,and how are you? If it's not rocket science, then just give an example. After all communication is created between people, not a code one person has to crack."
How can I give an example? As it is not one size fits all.
My profile is unique to me and no one else, why would it be rude to message me with a reason why they were attracted in the first place?
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"It is often recommended in the Forums to act the same as you do in real life when you are interacting with people .e.g at a club to be friendly and polite....Often in real life, it is common to open a conversation with new people with " Hi, how are you"...So what not in here?..."
For me, on a night out im likely to be having fun and enjoying myself, so a hi how are you, with a smile etc is likely to get a good response.
When I'm at home, fed up and in my pjs on a Saturday night after a shitty week with a grumpy 4 year old, a mother in hospital and chaos at work and someone I don't know asks me how I am they don't wamna here the answer..., so rather than just lie and say 'fine' it's easier to delete it. Lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
How can I give an example? As it is not one size fits all.
My profile is unique to me and no one else, why would it be rude to message me with a reason why they were attracted in the first place?
"
How is being respectful and starting off with a polite "how are you?" showing that a person can't talk about how they are attracted to you? I mean, a person going to a club would be really creeped out by a guy who out of nowhere started going on about the persons body or what they would like to do with it. But that is just my opinion being the woman I am.
And honestly, there are thousands of profiles on this site, and they don't really vary that much in information. There are nice pictures of body parts and there is information about a persons sexual preferences and fantasies. There isn't much to start a personified and inspired message to start with. Like, if this page was a vanilla social network, with persons interests, you could start of talking about your favourite writer the first thing you do, but this is about sex, and being too straight forward about sex in a first message puts most people off. At least if you want to go off the many profiles who state "we aren't only after sex, this is a social thing for us and we want to make friends." Hence, it's easier to start off with being polite, and getting to know how that person talks before going into the nitty gritty. |
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