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By *reyja OP Woman
over a year ago
no idea!! bloody satnav!! |
Has anyone ever been in a situation when after meeting a person they become or appear to become clingy or possessive? Questioning who you are talking too/ if you intend to meet?
How do you deal with it without causing offence? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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mabe gently remind them your single n free to chat n meet who you like hun after all this is a swingers site not a dating site and unless you have agreed to be fb's or a cpl it really is non of their bees wax who or what you do xx |
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By *usterMan
over a year ago
worthing |
Don't worry about causing offence.If they are becoming over-clingy they need telling that it's not OK. They may not be aware that they are, or just don't give a damn. In either case you are the one who needs to feel comfortable. |
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By *oletiCouple
over a year ago
Doncaster |
One of our meets with a couple the woman started messaging my hubby after saying she missed him and couldnt stop thinking about him. We just firmly said that it wasnt ok to say these things. She got abussive and blocked us haha. You just need to tell them its not ok and not what you are here for. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I met someone in the hot tub of a club, both of us naked and others in the tub at the same time. I watched her massage and wank another guy, we played together later and swapped numbers so that we could meet again. We did meet just the two of us and saw each other at the club and with other people.
Then she started calling me her boyfriend and calling /texting all the time, I counted 14 texts one morning. She wouldn't stop and it got difficult to go to the club.
Nasty and unpleasant. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I usually point out the very nature of the site. The fact it is a swinging website. Even if it was a more conventional dating website , clingy-ness after one meet is still not okay.
Be open, honest, and upfront about it. There are a lot of emotions that naturally surround sex, people who aren't mature enough to handle them, shouldn't be having sex.
I've become increasingly more careful in the information I wish to divulge to any meets I have.
Unless you made a specific agreement to be exclusive- you do not owe them anything. Especially not your body. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone ever been in a situation when after meeting a person they become or appear to become clingy or possessive? Questioning who you are talking too/ if you intend to meet?
How do you deal with it without causing offence? "
Divorced her problem solved , I hate insecure clingy people just drives me mad |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Redkixx - couldn't have put it better.
I'm very conscious of not becoming clingy but keeping up communications with an exceptional partner is important to me as I prefer repeat meets.
Hence I may appear 'clingy' to some but as soon as I notice I'm the one initiating contact all the time, that's it, I lose interest and move on. |
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By *reyja OP Woman
over a year ago
no idea!! bloody satnav!! |
Thanks for all the input and advice xx
Been on and off the site for a few years and it's the first time I've encountered this sort of behaviour... I did think that maybe I was misinterpreting the questions to begin with, and put it down to general chitchat.
But Now it's increased to being asked on a daily basis it's become obvious that it's a bit more than that |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find this happens more with younger single women....perhaps treating this as the would a dating site. One particular 23 yr old from Hereford (no longer on site) became a right bunny boiler! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Before our first mmf we socially met a few guys and chose one to be the first. One of the others got the right hump first by seeing our social veris and completely flipped when he saw the actual mmf veri. Needless to say we didn't go any further with him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hubby and me met a couple twice and hubby got 214 messages from the fem over 2 days and I only got 2 from her fella (something not right there lol). They only stopped when I told her hubby what she was doing. At first my hubby was flattered but he soon realised that she was trouble.
.xX Jo Xx. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
Forum Mod |
I don't tell any of my friends if I'm meeting anyone else,I don't talk about meets,I don't show verifications
If I get questioned I turn deaf,I don't have any interest in what the people I know are doing or who they're fucking so don't expect them to be nosey about what I'm doing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I used to get it sometimes on my single profile (fem) so stopped showing any veris or the summary. Hated being contacted as soon as I came online or being asked who I was chatting with so not replying to their messages. Thank goodness for the block button but it did make me cautious with personal information.
His story is in a different league should he wish to share it sometime. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Unfortunately I get it quite often!
You think you're meeting someone for great sex - and hopefully friendship - but before you know it you're getting umpteen messages a day and they want you to be exclusive!
At the other end of the scale though are those who claim to be looking for a regular friend so you'll meet them - the meet is brilliant - and yet the second the meet's over they're messaging their next potential meet and you're history!
One thing I've learned on fab is that as far as most guys are concerned - the next meet is always the best meet!!
I still love the site though! Xx |
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Had it often when I was meeting men as a single fem. One I told I only meet repeat meet after two weeks, called me on the dot and said, here I am ... another started to think we had a regular thing and yet another started getting mad when I had things to do in the real world, work, kids etc. Drama, baggage and unfinished business with previous relationships that they are trying to foist upon you ... I just block and move on. Always stayed clear of any connection until Mr came along, now we are inseparable, now where is he!? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've had clingy & bordering on stalker behaviour before which has put me right off single men meets & completely put me off meets at my home as I was in fear he would turn up at any point.
Clingy means different things to different people tho & whilst he insisted he wanted NSA & just friendship, the level of contact was far too much for me & he really couldn't see what he was doing wrong. Similar to how other people have mentioned with getting a message the second I had gone online, numerous lengthy messages received all day etc.
Took a good 2 months after my first message to ask to leave me alone before the final message I received & fluctuated between being nice to me to just been down right abusive if he couldn't get my attention |
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By *reyja OP Woman
over a year ago
no idea!! bloody satnav!! |
That's how it's been for me... The second I come online I'm messaged, if I don't read and reply I get another 3 within seconds of each other! And it's been daily
I tried being diplomatic,I tried being blunt... Nothing worked so I've had no choice but to block!! I don't need the drama lol
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've done the same, blocked them, sometimes you just have to.
Happened to me with someone, who seemed nice but he wanted a relationship, and he found one eventually - i never heard nothing from him while he was with her - as soon as they split up he's back to pestering, so blocked him. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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A clingy couple, constant messages - Will being a gent and replying - when we talked and he understood how irritated I was, he stopped replying. The problem was we really liked the couple, but it just got too much!
We only give out Wills mobile on the day of the meet for last minute directions etc but I make it very clear that all messages are kept on here. We don't live in each other's pockets, and it can cause problems but we don't let it x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I had a great meet with a young 24 year old female. It wasn't stalking or clingy but I guess this is how young people communicate now , but she would text me all day long. I had to tell her please don't text me until after 5pm. She got mad and called me arrogant |
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We used to have fun with a young lad and he got very Clingy. It was on our door step started in a pub he would never leave us alone when we were out it was his first time he had been with a couple and he thought that every one we spoke too we were fucking |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I must be rubbish no one's ever got clingy with me lol "
I have had it . Won't leave you alone keep ringing asking what your doing . Who are you texting
Questioning who you are talking to who your friends are . Telling people to back off you are taken
It absolutely makes your life hell its like a mental torture
Even worse when they accuse you of lying about what your doing because their view does not fit in with their story
And even worse than that when you have to lye to keep the peace over something stupid like someone kept you chatting at work etc Etc |
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"Has anyone ever been in a situation when after meeting a person they become or appear to become clingy or possessive? Questioning who you are talking too/ if you intend to meet?
How do you deal with it without causing offence? "
Could care less if "what part of nsa are you struggling with?" causes offense Why on earth would I justify my actions to anyone let alone someone I met on here! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Used to chat to a guy that became a pest. He was on my Kik to make it easier to chat. The minute I came online here, when he was, I'd get a message on Kik from him. I'd not always respond straight away as I was here, id them get messages on here asking why I wasn't chatting. He was quickly removed from any forms of communication channels. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ive had it in the past even had a regular thing going with a guy which i thought was going swimmingly. Then bam he says the L word and i had to kindly put some distance between us and remind him im not here for that. Safe to say we dont see each other any more.
x |
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