FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > i really wanna go to a swingers club but !!
i really wanna go to a swingers club but !!
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too  ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ? "
Yes the hosts showed me round then left me to it. Go on, be brave big boy you can do it! |
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ?
Yes the hosts showed me round then left me to it. Go on, be brave big boy you can do it! "
you know think I'm gonna go for it uno ! Just wanted to know what to expect when I walk in if that makes sense |
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Never been to one but know a lot of people who have.
main piece of advice id offer you is not to 'be a pest'- don't follow people round, just say hello, chat normally, see if they're interested if you like them- if they aren't just move on. the main complaint is always annoying, pushy blokes who expect a shag for their entrance fee |
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"Never been to one but know a lot of people who have.
main piece of advice id offer you is not to 'be a pest'- don't follow people round, just say hello, chat normally, see if they're interested if you like them- if they aren't just move on. the main complaint is always annoying, pushy blokes who expect a shag for their entrance fee"
thank you very much for this advice really appreciated it !! Was u alone the first time u went |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ? "
I did too! Had no idea what to expect but had a great night. You'll be fine! |
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ?
I did too! Had no idea what to expect but had a great night. You'll be fine! "
thanks penny rose for your imput it really does help !! Xx |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ? "
yep i did..curiosity will get the better of you and you will do it ..cos you can...  |
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ? "
Yep me too . Just do it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !!  never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho "
. One way of getting into a club without paying single guy entry ,,,,,,,!!!!!!!!? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !! never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho . One way of getting into a club without paying single guy entry ,,,,,,,!!!!!!!!?"
but the flaw in the plan is no one will fall for it.
OP do your research on the type of club you would like to attend. Deep breath, man up and walk thro the door. That's the hard part. |
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ?
Yep me too . Just do it"
And me.
OP you're in an area with plenty of club choice. Pick one that's single guy friendly and go with a friendly attitude remembering that just being there is no guarantee of play. |
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By *not69Man
over a year ago
Lancashire |
Go with a view to making new friends and that play is s bonus. Don't sit at the far side of the club on your own, stay by the bar and get to know people. Don't follow people around. Treat it like your first night in a new local pub, go there with the some intention of making friends. Become a regular and people will get to know your face and when they see your a decent sociable guy who don't lurk in corridors following people around they will be more likely to talk to you. I've made lots of really good friends at cupids, some I play with and some I don't. When you get there tell the staff it's your first time and they will show you round and tell you the rules. Have fun |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Club managers and hosts will 'walk you through' ok thank you mean a lot as I really do wanna see what it's all a bout "
Any club worth their salt will give new visitors a tour of the facilities. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I went on my own as well. Was a bit worried coz most of the guys who go to clubs i'd turned them down so was hoping not to bump into any of them.
It was good. I wasn't made to feel uncomfortable at all, despite being really nervous. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !! never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho "
Ok do you go in a pub on your own ( i bet you do)
nothing different x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Club managers and hosts will 'walk you through' ok thank you mean a lot as I really do wanna see what it's all a bout
Any club worth their salt will give new visitors a tour of the facilities. "
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Club managers and hosts will 'walk you through' ok thank you mean a lot as I really do wanna see what it's all a bout
Any club worth their salt will give new visitors a tour of the facilities.
"
But they won't fluff you once your in..... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The problem is plucking up the courage to go into a club for the first time - once you are in you will wonder why you were nervous in the first place. "
I'm hoping to go to a club for the first time - on a bi night in the next week or two and I'm sure you're right. |
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By *ilacWoman
over a year ago
Cheshire |
"Never been to one but know a lot of people who have.
main piece of advice id offer you is not to 'be a pest'- don't follow people round, just say hello, chat normally, see if they're interested if you like them- if they aren't just move on. the main complaint is always annoying, pushy blokes who expect a shag for their entrance fee thank you very much for this advice really appreciated it !! Was u alone the first time u went "
I was alone the first time I went. I often go alone. |
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"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !! never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho . One way of getting into a club without paying single guy entry ,,,,,,,!!!!!!!!?"
money isn't a issue when it come to having a good time ! |
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"The problem is plucking up the courage to go into a club for the first time - once you are in you will wonder why you were nervous in the first place. "
thank for this glad you see where I'm comin from
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Thank you all for ur imput just gonna bite the bullet and grow some extra balls as these two wasn't a buff but you have all succeeded in giving me that extra ball lol to go and walk tru a door next step is !! Finding the right place now the private club in Birmingham is close to me but I was told its uses prositutes to please the men and I don't want to go out like that for the first time ! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ? "
I did this...its not that scary! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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if you are going to the club i think u are
speak to them, they will show you the club and take it all in and have a few drinks at the bar
gradually u will meet people and get on with people u may want to play with |
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"Go with a view to making new friends and that play is s bonus. Don't sit at the far side of the club on your own, stay by the bar and get to know people. Don't follow people around. Treat it like your first night in a new local pub, go there with the some intention of making friends. Become a regular and people will get to know your face and when they see your a decent sociable guy who don't lurk in corridors following people around they will be more likely to talk to you. I've made lots of really good friends at cupids, some I play with and some I don't. When you get there tell the staff it's your first time and they will show you round and tell you the rules. Have fun"
thanks for this mate really appreciated ! Where is cupids ?
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm off to Abfabs in London this coming Monday. First time I've been to a club but I just figure you need to man up and leave your inhibitions at the door. Pretty excited to tell you the truth! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm off to Abfabs in London this coming Monday. First time I've been to a club but I just figure you need to man up and leave your inhibitions at the door. Pretty excited to tell you the truth! "
enjiy x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm off to Abfabs in London this coming Monday. First time I've been to a club but I just figure you need to man up and leave your inhibitions at the door. Pretty excited to tell you the truth!
enjiy x"
Got a feeling he will, it's a good night.
Don't forget brush to explore the dungeon and the cinema they are where the more interesting stuff tends to happen |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm off to Abfabs in London this coming Monday. First time I've been to a club but I just figure you need to man up and leave your inhibitions at the door. Pretty excited to tell you the truth!
enjiy x
Got a feeling he will, it's a good night.
Don't forget brush to explore the dungeon and the cinema they are where the more interesting stuff tends to happen"
Thanks guys! I'm keen to check it all out as I don't like to do things by halves
Also shyness has never been a problem for me, so hopefully I get to meet a few fab folk there. And although all the reviews look great I'm going in there with low expectations, in the hope they can only be well and truly exceeded.
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It can be a bit daunting at first, but if its a good club they will show you around.
Be prepared to socialise even with people you don't want to play with they may no someone you do want to play with.
Smile and look approachable.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Pussy!  "
Too true
OP should try going as a tgirl with a holdall but not just clothes but shoes,wig,make up etc...cant say its Mrs's washing or something...now that takes some nerve 1st time  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It can be a bit daunting at first, but if its a good club they will show you around.
Be prepared to socialise even with people you don't want to play with they may no someone you do want to play with.
Smile and look approachable.
"
Great advice miss x |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !! never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho "
Our pace for fun has someone escort nubies round the premises and tell them the club rules.
My advice if you ant fund anyone go by yourself. x  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It can be a bit daunting at first, but if its a good club they will show you around.
Be prepared to socialise even with people you don't want to play with they may no someone you do want to play with.
Smile and look approachable.
"
I'm sure I'll be smiling but that's great advice. Thank you |
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By *oxesMan
over a year ago
Southend, Essex |
"If you want someone "just to walk you through", as you say, then why does it have to be a woman - why not a bloke?"
I think that is man code for. "I want someone to come with me". |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sure if I can go alone my first time as a titchy single girl then I'm sure you can too ok so your telling me you honestly just turned up to one on your own and just walked in ? "
I did |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
I always just say just go with an open mind and no expectations...
If you are socialable and can just have a reasonable conversation with people... You'll be fine
Basically just don't be an arse! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !! never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho "
yeah yeah it's not cos it's more expensive for a single bloke then lol |
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"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !! never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho yeah yeah it's not cos it's more expensive for a single bloke then lol"
as I said before what's money when it comes to having a good time ? Nothing so I'm not on a cheap one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"And uno what as it goes I would go with a man but I'm 100% straight wouldn't want any man getting it twisted if that makes sense "
Many men meet other men to chat just like women do |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Some advise for the OP....
When o went into a club for my first time I was extremely nervous, I had a guided tour of the venue and then back to the bar.
The main thing you need to do is speak to people! Don't sit by yourself waiting for all the attention cos it wont happen.
Make yourself known to people, be friendly and polite, manners cost nothing.
If you happen to see anyone that takes your eye, approach them and start a conversation!
Treat the place like its a social club, expect nothing, ans if anything does happen then it's a bonus for you.
Good luck, and above all be yourself.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some advise for the OP....
When o went into a club for my first time I was extremely nervous, I had a guided tour of the venue and then back to the bar.
The main thing you need to do is speak to people! Don't sit by yourself waiting for all the attention cos it wont happen.
Make yourself known to people, be friendly and polite, manners cost nothing.
If you happen to see anyone that takes your eye, approach them and start a conversation!
Treat the place like its a social club, expect nothing, ans if anything does happen then it's a bonus for you.
Good luck, and above all be yourself.
"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You must go to a club, even if you are alone. I have just returned from Abfabs at Kestrel and it blew my mind. Well worth the entry fee, so many great people and so much fun!! |
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By *lovisMan
over a year ago
Twickenham |
I'm always puzzled by the fact that some men make such a big deal of going to a club for the first time, yet are totally relaxed with the idea of getting naked and having sex with singles or couples who they've just met. |
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"You must go to a club, even if you are alone. I have just returned from Abfabs at Kestrel and it blew my mind. Well worth the entry fee, so many great people and so much fun!!"
It was a great night tonight but then it usually is |
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By *lovisMan
over a year ago
Twickenham |
"You must go to a club, even if you are alone. I have just returned from Abfabs at Kestrel and it blew my mind. Well worth the entry fee, so many great people and so much fun!!
It was a great night tonight but then it usually is "
And always when you're there!  |
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"You must go to a club, even if you are alone. I have just returned from Abfabs at Kestrel and it blew my mind. Well worth the entry fee, so many great people and so much fun!!
It was a great night tonight but then it usually is
And always when you're there! "
Merely a coincidence my friend |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I would want a female to acompany me just so she can walk me through !! never done nothing like it !! Would love to tho "
I feel the same just some help to break the ice. Shy boy I am hehe  |
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By *rsIdiotWoman
over a year ago
Bedworth |
Guys, I think you'll find that the reply from most women will be grow a pair and just go on your own.
Yes it can be daunting when you've never been before. It's the fear of the unknown that makes it so. But, like others have said, if you can walk in a pub on your own then a swingers club is no different.
If all of us ladies can manage to go solo, and not need someone to hold our hands then so can you |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You must go to a club, even if you are alone. I have just returned from Abfabs at Kestrel and it blew my mind. Well worth the entry fee, so many great people and so much fun!!
It was a great night tonight but then it usually is "
I'll definitely be going back when I'm in London and have time off in the evenings. I've heard Wednesday's are also good which is fitting given I'm usually in London Monday or Wednesday Happy days! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Xtasia are doing a murder mystery party this sat day if you really want to come to a club and meet people. It might be easier to do an activity where everyone is involved as its easier to break the ice. |
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"I'm always puzzled by the fact that some men make such a big deal of going to a club for the first time, yet are totally relaxed with the idea of getting naked and having sex with singles or couples who they've just met. "
simply it's the case of knowing what to expect
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm always puzzled by the fact that some men make such a big deal of going to a club for the first time, yet are totally relaxed with the idea of getting naked and having sex with singles or couples who they've just met. simply it's the case of knowing what to expect "
it's a swingers club, swingers meet there and sometimes have sex!
It's that simple! |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"I'm always puzzled by the fact that some men make such a big deal of going to a club for the first time, yet are totally relaxed with the idea of getting naked and having sex with singles or couples who they've just met.
simply it's the case of knowing what to expect "
... but you will never know unless you go
if everyone tells you that it will be okay, how many people have to tell you that before you believe them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm always puzzled by the fact that some men make such a big deal of going to a club for the first time, yet are totally relaxed with the idea of getting naked and having sex with singles or couples who they've just met. simply it's the case of knowing what to expect "
As a single gent, you should expect at least one shag, and if you don't get one they you should expect a refund from the club.
Well you did ask didn't you ???
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Put a status up asking if anyone is going on that night and if so to say hi. It can't hurt.
Also if you go on a party night check the clubs/events section to see whos going. You could always send a friendly message to someone on the guestlist and they might say hello when you get in.
Most are friendly to newbies |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I went on fri last wk for my 1st time on me own, knew no-one, not a drop of alcohol as driving. Had a cracking time & everyone made me feel so welcome & ended up going back on the sat too.
Managed to get childcare so going back on sat too |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm always puzzled by the fact that some men make such a big deal of going to a club for the first time, yet are totally relaxed with the idea of getting naked and having sex with singles or couples who they've just met. simply it's the case of knowing what to expect "
- There is likely to be nudity.
- There is likely to be sex, some open, some private.
- There are going to be something you really like, other things that may freak you out.
- No one will force you into anything
- People will only talk to you if you are prepared to talk to them
- If you never pick up the courage to go you'll never know what you're missing out on |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I went on fri last wk for my 1st time on me own, knew no-one, not a drop of alcohol as driving. Had a cracking time & everyone made me feel so welcome & ended up going back on the sat too.
Managed to get childcare so going back on sat too "
It's addictive isn't it.....
I can't wait until my next visit! |
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"Put a status up asking if anyone is going on that night and if so to say hi. It can't hurt.
Also if you go on a party night check the clubs/events section to see whos going. You could always send a friendly message to someone on the guestlist and they might say hello when you get in.
Most are friendly to newbies"
Check the club's website - there will be a link on the club's page on here - all clubs have faq's and etiquette guidance. Some also have a forum where you can chat with other clubgoers and let people know when you're going and that you're new and nervous.
Also tell the staff that you've never been to a club before when you arrive. They will generally give you a tour with lots of helpful info and you may be introduced to others as well. |
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By *uzy444Woman
over a year ago
in the suffolk countryside |
"I went on fri last wk for my 1st time on me own, knew no-one, not a drop of alcohol as driving. Had a cracking time & everyone made me feel so welcome & ended up going back on the sat too.
Managed to get childcare so going back on sat too
It's addictive isn't it.....
I can't wait until my next visit!"
yay!! well done you xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm always puzzled by the fact that some men make such a big deal of going to a club for the first time, yet are totally relaxed with the idea of getting naked and having sex with singles or couples who they've just met. "
Why? They are completely different situations. |
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"Put a status up asking if anyone is going on that night and if so to say hi. It can't hurt.
Also if you go on a party night check the clubs/events section to see whos going. You could always send a friendly message to someone on the guestlist and they might say hello when you get in.
Most are friendly to newbies"
thanks for your advice I this is something I will definitely be taking up xx hope all is well |
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"I went on fri last wk for my 1st time on me own, knew no-one, not a drop of alcohol as driving. Had a cracking time & everyone made me feel so welcome & ended up going back on the sat too.
Managed to get childcare so going back on sat too "
I have a feeling I'll be the same once I got I won't stop |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why don't all these shy, scared men arrange to meet up for a pint before hand and go in together? Obviously they will have to make a promise that they won't turn gay because they walked in together though... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Why don't all these shy, scared men arrange to meet up for a pint before hand and go in together? Obviously they will have to make a promise that they won't turn gay because they walked in together though..."
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By *not69Man
over a year ago
Lancashire |
"wow- I'm impressed- I would love to go to a club also- but, not on my own Ha Ha 
Man up "
I can fully understand a woman not wanting to go on her own, but there really is no reason to be worried. Just be sociable and don't be afraid to say no xx |
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By *osieWoman
over a year ago
Wembley |
"Why don't all these shy, scared men arrange to meet up for a pint before hand and go in together? Obviously they will have to make a promise that they won't turn gay because they walked in together though..."
At the last club I was at, one guy did exactly that but with more than a pint. He had the stupidest grin on his face and he got turned down by every woman there
Unfortuantely, he kept on drinking and was found in stupor at closing time |
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