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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Okay I hope this makes sense.
When we met, we were both singles on here...and for sometime we carried on meeting seperately... It worked great.
He would go and do something and I would eagerly await hearing about it and would even get disappointed if it wasnt as good as we had both hoped.. and vice versa.
Anyway, fast forward sometime and for a multitude of reasons... We have had a long time now of really only playing together and I ( Ms) have lost my nerve about it if I am honest. And have got myself quite panicked that it will destroy what we now have.
We have talked about this a lot and I do drive him a little insane with it as he can not work out how I can feel worried now after all we have shared and all we do share etc.
on a good day neither can I... And I do remember the buzz of meeting separate.
So is there any couples, ( real or FB) that have had anything similar.
I have suggested as I am happiest with clubs that we try separate clubs.. but even that I am finding myself having to put in provisos and rules etc..
I love playing together and adore seeing him with others... and I think I am scared of missing something..
So how do couples that play separate make sure that the other half doesnt miss out... or do you treat it as a Partner free night..
Help!!!!
Former confident Slut who is I think having a midlife crisis and getting all sensible..  |
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By *LCCCouple
over a year ago
Cambridge |
From what you have put it sounds like you used to do it, then stopped and are happy swinging together, but its not what is your motivation for wanting to swing separately again is. So the non-judgemental question I would ask is, why do you want to swing seperately?
You mention "real or FB" couples, I think that the 2 probably have a very different dynamic, if you describe what your relationship is, perhaps people in a similar situation to yourself will be most able to help. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I find it more exciting and sexy to play together.. Mr feels we have lost it a bit by only playing together.
We not so long back did a meet that I found amazingly good and he met a lady we both have known for many years at our hotel and I joined them both a few hours later. It was so sexy getting ready wondering and then getting there and mmmmm xx
After we had our time together and really was great x
I just I guess feel we out grew the need for seeprate meets but also don't want to be the one to suck the fun out of it... And as it worked before... Really not sure why it wouldn't again as an occasional thing x
As I said what we did with the lady at the hotel was so sexy and I still enjoy thinking about it now.. But when offeered the same in return I declined x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As relationships grow then the dynamics do tend to change. Why not either swing together or not at all. If it's upsetting you then it can't be healthy for your relationship. You might get back to separate meets later. It's meant to be fun.
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"As relationships grow then the dynamics do tend to change. Why not either swing together or not at all. If it's upsetting you then it can't be healthy for your relationship. You might get back to separate meets later. It's meant to be fun.
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I think it's just a case of I feel we evolved into how we are now. It maybe great fun.. But then its great fun watching him and if we aren't together I can't watch.
When I've met in the past I've always done videos and photos for Mr but most women are less keen for that. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I agree, its meant to be fun. Another option is that he plays separately, but that you don't. "
See that wouldn't work at all. I guess a lot of couples find it works for them to only play as a couple x and we meet other couples and occasional singles most weeks and I adore watching .. even if I'm not playing.
And some peoples private comments... Really... Use the green arrow |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Op hun you have just described me to a tea xx i love him fucking other women but get really nervous at meeting other guys xx "
See I can actually cum when he makes another woman orgasm but he's not met alone in about a year... Apart from the recent hotel meet and while I loved that... I just get really anxious of the unknown I guess...
And yeah... I'm trying to see just how much it excites him and find my feet again but something holds me back.
I feel such pride and sexual gratification when a woman tells me how good she found it xx and thanks me I just watched a lot of the time lol
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If it's causing you upset don't do it. This isn't something you should be doing because you feel it's what your partner wants or you're sucking the joy out of it if you don't.
If swinging or an aspect of it isn't a joyful experience or causes you anxiety and obvious unhappiness why are you doing it? I don't mean that harshly.
Personally if my partner was as hesitantas you are I wouldn't be happy to go ahead either. |
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Relationships change and evolve.
When we set up our couples account about a month after we met it was with the intention of using it to meet and play together. As our relationship grew and evolved neither of us have wanted to play with anyone else. We have talked about it often but we haven't done it.
We go to clubs sometimes and if we play it is with each other. We host the occasional party and attend others. Last summer we went to the swingfest weekend party. I swear we must be the only couple who can go to a weekend party filled with others having sex, do nothing at all there other than socialise and relax in the hot tub, then come home and fuck each other senseless 
I'm sure that our relationship will continue to evolve and there may be a time that we feel we do want to play with other people. We will keep talking and when that time comes we will embrace it and enjoy it. |
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