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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hey people, so I've decided to update my profile and would like some constructive feed back thanks.
Hi I'm Iain single guy(well wife doesn't know lol) and I love sex, I'm very experienced and can give you ladies everything you've every dreamed of, I can go all night and I breathe through my ears ha ha ha
I can be your Mr Grey.
I can't accommodate and I don't travel.
Will only meet local people but will message people all over the UK.
If you message me make sure you have pictures and attach a face picture, I don't have any pictures and won't send any.
I'm of athletic build and I'm in fantastic shape because 15 years ago I used to train, I haven't trained since and only eat junk food.
I won't meet single guys as that's just disgusting but happy to meet tv/ts.
If I do add photos I expect them to be fab'd, after all if I'm going to the effort of taking 30 different angles of my cock it's only fair.
I don't have any verifications but I'm really good.
I hate time wasters, the last 3 times I didn't turn up where all genuine, I couldn't be bothered, I was all mouth and the last time I just shit myself.
If I don't start to get meets soon I will leave the site but I will consider staying if you all message to beg me too(I'll post in my status if I consider leaving).
I also have a couples profile you can reach me through, I don't actually have a partner but I will meet on my own.
Ladies it goes without saying if we meet I will destroy you or rip you a new one.
If I message you with a 1 liner and several cock pics and you just delete my message without agreeing to meet me I will send you abusive and derogatory messages.
If I make the effort to look at your pictures but not your profile text I expect you out of good manners to fully read mine and when messaging put in the headline 'king of fab' or I will delete your message instantly.
I'm very open minded and up for ANYTHING !!! As long as it's not kinky, involves any kind of body fluid or touching.
I'm only on fab between 6am and 3am as I have a life, so don't expect an instant reply.
Can't wait for all your messages
So please give me some constructive feedback and any thoughts on making it better
Regards 'king of fab'
 "
Dear Mr king of fab, if only all profiles were as honest as this, lol!! I particularly like the ones where they just leave a message saying " yo, phone me bitch cos ive got a big dick and you need to suck it" how rude they didn't leave a name!!! Lol, WTF!
Response to that is usually, hey Mr anonymous if called a taxi, I'm not wearing any knickers, you can fuck me how ever you like, xIs I'm so desperate for said fuck, you don't even need to tell me your name, whether your a serial killer, whether you'll respect me in the morning or even ask my name. I'm on my way regardless" simply because I'm so worthless and have such low self respect, im just greatful you managed to send the se generic message to me along with the other 450, even if I'm only number 449! No need to rip an extra hole, I'll do it for you as i bend over with gratitude from the validation I'm about to recieve!! Amen xx 
Great post, glad your injecting a sense of humour but also bringing a very real scenario in play, whilst poking it's bum holio in the process! |
