FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Should there be an instant attraction
Should there be an instant attraction
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Not for everyone I know, but I couldn't do it any other way x | |||
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"For me it don't have to be an attraction as its just sex and prefer quickies "Would a warm blow up doll be enough?  | |||
"For me it don't have to be an attraction as its just sex and prefer quickies
Would a warm blow up doll be enough? "No I meet girls u know, just not thru fab | |||
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"Thanks for the feedback. It has helped me with my decision. I will continue to chat because we get in really well and will meet again socially to pursue x" Hope it works out for you. Tbh, i tend to fall for guys i have an instant attraction to on a meet, get well carried away with myself and start hoping for a life time of sex with them (couple of weeks later i'm over it). | |||
"Don't have to be a instant yes, as soon as I look at them, but if I'm still not convinced after a social its a no, one social is enough for me to know if I like someone or not " this | |||
"Don't have to be a instant yes, as soon as I look at them, but if I'm still not convinced after a social its a no, one social is enough for me to know if I like someone or not this"  | |||
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"Don't have to be a instant yes, as soon as I look at them, but if I'm still not convinced after a social its a no, one social is enough for me to know if I like someone or not " | |||
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"Has to be an instant yes for me. I usually chat for a long time. Always meet for coffee and I know straight away then if chemistry is there or not. Don't see the point in endless social meets on here!!" | |||
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"Has to be an instant yes for me. I usually chat for a long time. Always meet for coffee and I know straight away then if chemistry is there or not. Don't see the point in endless social meets on here!! "
Haven't got to the coffee stage for ages. First couple of mails they show what a total twat they are. | |||
"I'm attracted more to personality than looks and that tends to be quite instant. " agree those who have a good one tend to be deeper and full of surprises | |||
"Definitely need an attraction for anything more than a social, otherwise I'd find myself counting down the seconds until it was over... I'm one for socials first though or at least a no pressure meet which could move on to fun
Not for everyone I know, but I couldn't do it any other way x" | |||
"I have a question to put out there, I have my opinion but met a friend today who made me think! I always meet socially on the first occasion. If it's not an instant yes do you beleive it should be a no and move on to the next person or do you think that you can continue chatting and meet again socially and see?" That sounds like dating and I don't do dating. Instant attraction or it's not worth my time. And I have so little time I can't afford to waste it. | |||
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"Like alot of people have said before me, I feel one social is anough to see if an attraction, if I Didn't feel as though I want to gobble them up then, That's the end.I feel more than one social on own with a guy is more like dating which I'm not looking for" I think this will be the case for us if it's with people to play with; but if it's to meet socially as people we've got chatting to then lack of attraction is not an issue. | |||
"I have a question to put out there, I have my opinion but met a friend today who made me think! I always meet socially on the first occasion. If it's not an instant yes do you beleive it should be a no and move on to the next person or do you think that you can continue chatting and meet again socially and see?" I meet socially first if after exchange of face pics and a few messages there is a attraction. Then if the same attraction is there face to face and both people want to take it further then that's good. If not then move on | |||
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"I've found that different people want different things. As a sexually experienced woman, new to swinging, I thought I'd be fine with almost anonymous shags (as I was happier to have earlier in my life). However I found I've changed and like to socialise first, get to know someone a bit. There are some I wouldn't touch with a barge pole so they are always definite no's. The rest I'll give them a chance and see if there's any attraction sexually. If there is I'll go back for more. If not it was an experience. Que sera. "Same. | |||
"No...but talking turns me on. I love intelligent men. " me too | |||
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"We like to shag first to see if we are compatible, if we are we may meet you socially" | |||
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"For me it don't have to be an attraction as its just sex and prefer quickies
Would a warm blow up doll be enough? No I meet girls u know, just not thru fab "but you ask sooo nicely where do you get em from then? | |||
"Given the nature of the site, and the reason most of us are on here, if there's no instant attraction, be it looks, charisma, personality etc, then I really can't see the point of pursuing it. That applies either way " | |||
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"Definitely need an attraction for anything more than a social, otherwise I'd find myself counting down the seconds until it was over... I'm one for socials first though or at least a no pressure meet which could move on to fun
Not for everyone I know, but I couldn't do it any other way x" | |||
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"I am just wondering a little bit whether I should just message, shag and go. Men dont seem to want anything more, even though they say they do " You are here to get what you want out of it, not just provide some service to guys. Do what is right for you. | |||
"I am just wondering a little bit whether I should just message, shag and go. Men dont seem to want anything more, even though they say they do You are here to get what you want out of it, not just provide some service to guys. Do what is right for you." Well, I tried it my way, the meet them socially first, etc. It seemed to work, connection etc. Then they disappear after getting sex. I got it too, obviously but without disappearing lol. Yes, ill try to thank you | |||
"I am just wondering a little bit whether I should just message, shag and go. Men dont seem to want anything more, even though they say they do You are here to get what you want out of it, not just provide some service to guys. Do what is right for you. Well, I tried it my way, the meet them socially first, etc. It seemed to work, connection etc. Then they disappear after getting sex. I got it too, obviously but without disappearing lol. Yes, ill try to thank you " This is still ultimately a swinging site though. ... | |||
"I am just wondering a little bit whether I should just message, shag and go. Men dont seem to want anything more, even though they say they do You are here to get what you want out of it, not just provide some service to guys. Do what is right for you. Well, I tried it my way, the meet them socially first, etc. It seemed to work, connection etc. Then they disappear after getting sex. I got it too, obviously but without disappearing lol. Yes, ill try to thank you " Most guys will make a connection before they have sex, it's a part of how they get sex in the first place if they feel the woman needs that. Ever heard that joke: "Man and his wife have single beds, the man is feeling horny so whispers to his wife "come over to my bed darling" she does but on her way she trips over the lamp. he asks "you ok my love?" she smiles, says she fine. and gets into his bed. after she gets out to go back to her bed and trips over the lamp again, the guy says "watch what you're doing you stupid bitch"" Ok so guys aren't being abusive afterwards but the point is that some guys (men and women) will act a certain way to get what they want, and once they've got it they may or may not want it again and won't act that way again. Personally i just fuck guys with no intention of seeing them again, if it was good and they want to see me again then great but i don't really expect much from them in the first place apart from being a good fuck and showing me a good time and letting me enjoy their body while they enjoy mine. This suits me just fine but if it won't suit you then don't do it. I do think you have to be a hard hearted bitch to be like me and not take sex seriously or that it means anything more than pleasure for a while between the people doing it. I do enjoy the guys i've made a connection with, fair few guys i neglect and feel bad about it because they're genuinely nice guys and i just haven't made time for them. So there are guys out there who genuinely want that and it's hard to know which are which because some people will make out they want what you want to get what they want, it's manipulation. Some might have just changed their mind too, got a bit scared of committing themselves even a tiny bit, and some will already be attached. I know someone i made a very good connection with, met him a fair amount of times, chatted to him all day every day, from morning until really late at night, he was attached and i feel sad his girlfriend must have been badly neglected coz this guy was spending all his time with me. That's when i realised you can't take anyone on face value on this site, you have to be around them in their real life to know what's going on with people. | |||
"I am just wondering a little bit whether I should just message, shag and go. Men dont seem to want anything more, even though they say they do You are here to get what you want out of it, not just provide some service to guys. Do what is right for you. Well, I tried it my way, the meet them socially first, etc. It seemed to work, connection etc. Then they disappear after getting sex. I got it too, obviously but without disappearing lol. Yes, ill try to thank you This is still ultimately a swinging site though. ..." Yep | |||
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"I am just wondering a little bit whether I should just message, shag and go. Men dont seem to want anything more, even though they say they do You are here to get what you want out of it, not just provide some service to guys. Do what is right for you. Well, I tried it my way, the meet them socially first, etc. It seemed to work, connection etc. Then they disappear after getting sex. I got it too, obviously but without disappearing lol. Yes, ill try to thank you This is still ultimately a swinging site though. ..."
the way I see it, I'd rather be someone who fucks around and never promises anything beyond an occasional meet, if we get on.....I'm not here for mind games pish, and others should not be either.
Good stuff if one finds someone regular, but it rarely happens. | |||
"... This is still ultimately a swinging site though. ..." What do you mean by that? Obviously I know what kind of site it is. Just wondering what your comment means. | |||
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"We like to shag first to see if we are compatible, if we are we may meet you socially"  | |||
"I have a question to put out there, I have my opinion but met a friend today who made me think! I always meet socially on the first occasion. If it's not an instant yes do you beleive it should be a no and move on to the next person or do you think that you can continue chatting and meet again socially and see?" That's dating site strategy to my mind - if someone is a genuine relationship prospect for me and I enjoy their company I am willing to see if an attraction grows. I don't even meet for a coffee on here unless I am pretty sure there is mutual attraction.  | |||
"I have a question to put out there, I have my opinion but met a friend today who made me think! I always meet socially on the first occasion. If it's not an instant yes do you beleive it should be a no and move on to the next person or do you think that you can continue chatting and meet again socially and see? That's dating site strategy to my mind - if someone is a genuine relationship prospect for me and I enjoy their company I am willing to see if an attraction grows. I don't even meet for a coffee on here unless I am pretty sure there is mutual attraction. "usually if I agree to coffee means mutual attraction too | |||
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