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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Due to medical conditions I haven't met anyone since December, except socially. I took a big step and met a guy socially and arranged a play meet for last week. Due to illness I had to cancel, he was lovely about it. I now realise I can't do it. I'm self conscious and lack self confidence anyway but not having been with anyone since December, I'm worse. I'm going to have to cancel again as I feel sick and close to tears the closer it gets. He already knows how I feel but says I'll be fine one we get started. Its been good to get this off my chest and I'm expecting good and bad comments..so be it. Thanks for reading x   |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I felt like this when I first started meeting.
You could turn this into going for a brew only? That's what happened with my first meet when I got nervous, he was great about it and our next meet I stayed overnight at his.
There's no stopping me now lol. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Take your time. You need to be physically and mentally ready. There's no rush. Maybe stick to social meets for now until you feel 100%.
But I get nervous and stressed prior to a meet and always spend time getting to know someone before playing.
good luck. X |
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By *ourbonKissMan
over a year ago
a land up north..... of leicester |
Getting back onto the proverbial horse is always a big step to take especially after a long time, maybe instead of having the intention to play on this meet you could make it a private social? Then if the mood takes you then a play can be had |
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There is absolutely nothing wrong with taking your time and being comfortable. Confidence comes with time.
Maybe set up your profile to look at social meets only maybe none play date nights. Find people you enjoy spending time with and the play will come spontaneously when you are ready. |
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By *hortieWoman
over a year ago
Northampton |
"Well I cancelled the meet. Even though the guy knew my situation before our social he has blocked me. His loss "
Awww.. you will get there when you're ready 
I have hidradenitis suppuritiva, and sometimes i cringe at the thought of a guy seeing my bits if i have just recovered from a flare up and i have scars at the top of my thighs, cause some guys might think its crotch rot  so i totally understand where you're coming from.
All in good time my dear.. all in good time 
If you are on FB, are there no groups you can join for your condition? Can be a great help!!
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By *iewMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Angus & Findhorn |
"Well I cancelled the meet. Even though the guy knew my situation before our social he has blocked me. His loss "
to be fair, you have made the right decision for you and he has blocked to probably not bother you again.
hold you head high and respect his choice.
good luck |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I cancelled the meet. Even though the guy knew my situation before our social he has blocked me. His loss "
And it is his loss.
After almost 18 months of not feeling great and an op at the end of last year, it took me a while to join here let alone feel confident enough to meet anyone socially and finally play. All I can say is that there are some very understanding and considerate men (and women) on here. Personally, I don't regret being open about why I was nervous initially. Those who didn't understand weren't going to be right for me. Although I still am conscious of the scar, it's no longer a hinderance.
Take your time and do what's right for you. You're the only one who knows how you feel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I cancelled the meet. Even though the guy knew my situation before our social he has blocked me. His loss
Awww.. you will get there when you're ready
I have hidradenitis suppuritiva, and sometimes i cringe at the thought of a guy seeing my bits if i have just recovered from a flare up and i have scars at the top of my thighs, cause some guys might think its crotch rot so i totally understand where you're coming from.
All in good time my dear.. all in good time
If you are on FB, are there no groups you can join for your condition? Can be a great help!!
"
Sorry to hijack the thread but could u pm me please. I'd like to pick your brain about the HS x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have to be in the mood to play and have socials
if im.not in the mood I.dont
and if I have a meet listing up if nothing tempts me I dont met.
you meet for you. Do it when your ready xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Due to medical conditions I haven't met anyone since December, except socially. I took a big step and met a guy socially and arranged a play meet for last week. Due to illness I had to cancel, he was lovely about it. I now realise I can't do it. I'm self conscious and lack self confidence anyway but not having been with anyone since December, I'm worse. I'm going to have to cancel again as I feel sick and close to tears the closer it gets. He already knows how I feel but says I'll be fine one we get started. Its been good to get this off my chest and I'm expecting good and bad comments..so be it. Thanks for reading x "
No-one I hope could be horrible about this. At the end of the day, you can only do what you feel ready for....why not just go for a social meet only with the lucky fella?
Big hugs to you for being brave enough to post this x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Well I cancelled the meet. Even though the guy knew my situation before our social he has blocked me. His loss "
That wasn't nice of him to go & block u, obv not concerned about ur feelings is hour the dick, hope ur feeling better now hun x |
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I hope op that you feel better soon. Maybe just meet socially for a while and
make that absolutely clear.
I don't think people should be bad mouthing the guy who isn't here to speak for himself though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't bear a grudge, I can understand him being annoyed but I feel much calmer and happier now I've cancelled. Never mind, keep moving forwards x "
Everyone has a crisis of confidence every now and then x ive had my share lol x hope things work out x amd bbw does describe you x beautiful being the most fitting xz |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Due to medical conditions I haven't met anyone since December, except socially. I took a big step and met a guy socially and arranged a play meet for last week. Due to illness I had to cancel, he was lovely about it. I now realise I can't do it. I'm self conscious and lack self confidence anyway but not having been with anyone since December, I'm worse. I'm going to have to cancel again as I feel sick and close to tears the closer it gets. He already knows how I feel but says I'll be fine one we get started. Its been good to get this off my chest and I'm expecting good and bad comments..so be it. Thanks for reading x "
i am confused here you have veri from september this year ??? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't bear a grudge, I can understand him being annoyed but I feel much calmer and happier now I've cancelled. Never mind, keep moving forwards x "
Never regret or feel bad over doing what is best for you. As long as you cancelled and did not simply not show for a meet you have done nothing wrong,
Good luck and do not pressure yourself into a meet |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Due to medical conditions I haven't met anyone since December, except socially. I took a big step and met a guy socially and arranged a play meet for last week. Due to illness I had to cancel, he was lovely about it. I now realise I can't do it. I'm self conscious and lack self confidence anyway but not having been with anyone since December, I'm worse. I'm going to have to cancel again as I feel sick and close to tears the closer it gets. He already knows how I feel but says I'll be fine one we get started. Its been good to get this off my chest and I'm expecting good and bad comments..so be it. Thanks for reading x i am confused here you have veri from september this year ??? "
That makes two of us ... 
And they guy may have blocked you as not to bother you again, maybe respect his decision |
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"Due to medical conditions I haven't met anyone since December, except socially. I took a big step and met a guy socially and arranged a play meet for last week. Due to illness I had to cancel, he was lovely about it. I now realise I can't do it. I'm self conscious and lack self confidence anyway but not having been with anyone since December, I'm worse. I'm going to have to cancel again as I feel sick and close to tears the closer it gets. He already knows how I feel but says I'll be fine one we get started. Its been good to get this off my chest and I'm expecting good and bad comments..so be it. Thanks for reading x i am confused here you have veri from september this year ???
That makes two of us ...
And they guy may have blocked you as not to bother you again, maybe respect his decision "
He has probably just blocked you so he doesn't bother you again and waste each other's time. I do that to other profiles as well when I realise it is not going to go any further.
Don't let it put you off from arrainging further social meets though  |
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