FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > bullying

bullying

By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

The purpose of this site i enjoyment.

Yet it i abused by some to send abusive messages, leave snide forum comments and ruin what this site i all about.

The site does not interact with the complaitant once the victim has messaged them to inform them of the ongoings and feedback is not available for whatever action the site does or does not take.

So reassurance is non existant

Should the site do more to help? What could be done?

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By *oe_Steve_NWestCouple over a year ago

Bolton

Report abusive messages - there's no need for them - ignore snide remarks on forums - they aren't gonna kill you! Feedback from admin? they're probably quite busy! I haven't seen 'bullying' as such - of the few people who use the forums the tiny snide minority can't possibly spoil the enjoyment of the site as a whole - it's an aside really so if you're unhappy withe them don't post in them and just enjoy the site!

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

Here is the answer to your question that Admin answered on another thread.

"""Just a quick note. If people report others and we can verify that they have broken site rules, we always take action (either a first and final warning, partially suspended account, fully suspended, mixture of the above).

Every single report sent via the REPORT link is reviewed. Clearly it's not in our interests to have people on here who are bad for the site. Equally we need to verify what has been reported and be fair to those who have been reported.

Admin

PS. we never provide feedback on what has happened. It's just not practical given that we get 100s of reports a day.

Here is what the page says after a report has been submitted:

Your feedback has been saved.

A website admin will shortly review your feedback and take the necessary action. After reviewing the evidence available to us, we may disable an account, remove a user, disable certain aspects of that user's account or issue a warning.

By leaving feedback you help improve the site for everyone who uses it. Thank you.""""

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Victim is a bit of a harsh word to choose just because people dont always agree with what you post

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By *b430Man over a year ago

Tayside

"The purpose of this site i enjoyment.

Yet it i abused by some to send abusive messages, leave snide forum comments and ruin what this site i all about.

The site does not interact with the complaitant once the victim has messaged them to inform them of the ongoings and feedback is not available for whatever action the site does or does not take.

So reassurance is non existant

Should the site do more to help? What could be done?

The site might be able to help find some of those missing S's

Sorry just a wee joke!

As far as bullying goes, do you class that as people putting a different point of view to your own in the threads you start?

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

There is a bit of bullying or undermining or intimidation going on in the forums but it's easy to ignore.

There are new people joining the forums and site everyday consequently some subjects get repeated all the time.

For some of the longer term members who use the forums daily this can be a bit tedious and I sympathise with them.

But I think it is good that these subjects are aired regularly, sometimes peoples views change, sometimes new information is available, sometimes a new approach to a subject is brought into the equation.

There is a facility in the forums to SEARCH for topics that have already been discussed but that doesn't mean that people can't start a new debate on the topic.

I for one have strong views on some subjects and in the past have been known not to "count to ten" when I see a post that infuriates me, later when I have calmed down my response might be less harsh, so I am trying to count to 10 before replying to any threads.

Whilst I do have strong views I never expect everyone to agree with them and love to debate many subjects.

In the past I have had my views changed by the forums and sometimes had my views reaffirmed.

We should all just try and remember that having different opinions is not a bad thing, discussing them openly is good, some things which are obvious to some are not obvious to all and sometimes we forget that we all had questions when we first joined the scene.

If your not interested in a topic, pass on by to one you like, if someone says something you dont agree with or understand post your own personal opinion without being abusive or ask for clarification of a statement.

Read your own advice (ooops sorry that one was for me)

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

A forum is a place for each person to air their opinions. We all have our different ways of expressing ourselves. I love a debate. It keeps the mind healthy!

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By (user no longer on site) OP over a year ago

Id like to thankyou for a genuine an thoughtful awnser that really helped.

And thankyou for not being childish and thinking im moaning because people have different opinion to mine in the forums. I enjoy the forums, hence why i contribute so often.

If certain people had bothered to read my forum properly theyd see i refered to nasty an intimidating messages being sent to me. Thats why i asked for advice and not insensitive pointless opiniated statements based on nothing but opinion.

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

"Id like to thankyou for a genuine an thoughtful awnser that really helped.

And thankyou for not being childish and thinking im moaning because people have different opinion to mine in the forums. I enjoy the forums, hence why i contribute so often.

Dont let anyone intimidate you, report, block and move on, plenty of nice people on here and they far outweigh the wankers

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By (user no longer on site) over a year ago

Bullying ?

Victim ?

Ruin ?

For heavens sake it's a forum on a website if you get an abusive message, report it and if you don't like a comment on a forum, ignore it and if it breaks the rules report it but certainly don't lose any sleep over it

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By *b430Man over a year ago

Tayside

"Id like to thankyou for a genuine an thoughtful awnser that really helped.

And thankyou for not being childish and thinking im moaning because people have different opinion to mine in the forums. I enjoy the forums, hence why i contribute so often.

I read it, or I wouldn't have bothered to reply to it, just because I didn't agree with all of it then it doesn't mean my reply was just an "insensitive pointless opiniated statements based on nothing but opinion"

I may have taken offence to your own "opinionated statement" on my reply in here and felt it might have needed reported too but seeing as this is an open forum and you asked for other people's opinion then don't be surprised that others may not agree with you!

Every answer you or others get in the forums will always be based on the "opinion" of the person posting the reply, what else could it be?

As always, the above is just my opinion!

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By *ugby 123Couple over a year ago
Forum Mod

O o O oo

"Id like to thankyou for a genuine an thoughtful awnser that really helped.

And thankyou for not being childish and thinking im moaning because people have different opinion to mine in the forums. I enjoy the forums, hence why i contribute so often.

To be fair, you did mention someone making snide remarks on the forums.....and you are now doing the exact thing yourself on the post I have quoted.

Maybe everyone are as bad as each other, but all think they are victims....funnily enough, we see a lot of that on the forums too.

I have pasted what Admin say they do with reports so I am guessing that was all the information you needed. So I am closing this now.

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