FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Trouble getting a meet
Trouble getting a meet
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Well I am a shy kind of a guy and am not really good at this stuff and just recently out of a 6 year relationship so out of practise what should I write?? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Oh dear, another newbie who thought he'd be knee deep in pussy within a week of joining.
You've only been here three weeks.
It took me nearly 6 months to get my first meet.
You really need to give it more time, and to be fair, your profile could do with some work.
Nothing wrong with your pictures, but think about your profile text.
Might be worth having a look around at other profiles to give you some pointers.
Think about what your profile says about you. Try to be subjective.
It's very difficult to try to put yourself in the position of the types of people you're trying to attract, but think about what your profile says about you.
Do you think you stand out from all the other single guys on this site.
You need to demonstrate that you're prepared to put in the effort.
Your profile is your advert - so sell yourself!!!
Also consider this. The ratio of men to women on fab is around 100-1. Yes, it really is that high, and cliché though it may sound, they really do want to get an idea of the type of person you are.
Hang in there and stay positive.
I myself try to avoid ever posting a negative status.
Believe me, it can make a difference.
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Your profile should reflect you, what you are looking for, what you can offer etc.
If you think it's ok as it is, then leave it, and adjust your expectation instead.
There are many more males on here than females and couples, it's simply a matter of selling yourself and not giving up just because pussy isn't being thrown at you the minute you walk in. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you for your advice I will rethink my profile and for the record I dint think I would be knee deep in pussy I just thought I would have been talking to a few ladies by now that's all but the way that you expland it all makes sence thank you for your advice . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"...and for the record I dint think I would be knee deep in pussy...."
No, I know, I was exaggerating, lol
We just see a lot of males posting on the forum about not getting meets, or replies etc
Glad to see that you've taken the replies in the manner they were intended and that you're going to take a positive approach to making yourself more appealing.
The usual advice, much as RedAngel said, is change your approach or change your expectations.
Some ignore this advice, but others, like you, take it on board.
Good for you! 
Enjoy your time on fab.
Try the chat rooms too.
You'll discover, as I did, that there's a lot more to swinging than just sex.
You'll make some great friends here too.
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
To reinforce what others have said already, the main issue here is you are a mere beginner!
If you thought this would be an "Instant Fix" site, jog on! It doesn't work that way at all.
Effectively, you must SELL YOURSELF! you have to turn yourself into a person that people will want to meet.
Your Profile is two lines; it says nothing about yourself, what you like, what you seek, etc etc. Yes, mention you are new to the scene (as everyone has to start some time) but don't keep that in for ever.
You state you cannot accommodate; that puts people off as they jump to often incorrect conclusions, so you need to say simply why you can't.
You need to get to clubs or socials in your area. Get onto the Forums and participate there too. It becomes matter of being noticed, of selling yourself. You are up against dozens, if not, hundreds of guys, all seeking the same thing, so you have to stand out
Yes, it can take months to get started; it takes patience, even more patience and perseverance. It does work in time.
Good Luck! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you guys for your advice I will take it on bord and I hope to make a lot of frends that's why I joined the site so that I could make frends more than just have in sex with loads of pepole |
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By *ENGUYMan
over a year ago
Hull |
"Thank you guys for your advice I will take it on bord and I hope to make a lot of frends that's why I joined the site so that I could make frends more than just have in sex with loads of pepole"
Just a small point, but which is important too. that is, ensure your Profile has correctly spelled words etc. Yes, I know that brings out the Spelling/Punctuation Police, but a well constructed Profile with correct spelling etc works wonders too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Poor spelling, and your bored????? What a turn off. Women are not on here to satisfy your boredom. There is nothing in your profile that stands out. You look Miserable in your pics plus your shy and bored? I'm Just being honest and not intending to insult or upset but your profile is simply dull, shows no confidence and miserable pics. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Poor spelling, and your bored????? What a turn off. Women are not on here to satisfy your boredom. There is nothing in your profile that stands out. You look Miserable in your pics plus your shy and bored? I'm Just being honest and not intending to insult or upset but your profile is simply dull, shows no confidence and miserable pics."
Couldn't have put it better myself..
Also it's Friend and Gentle not Frend and Gental.......spelling might seem like a really petty thing, but you'd be amazed how important it is.
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I think its worth remembering that its not that easy for any of us to find a meet. At least not with someone you actually want to meet!
We have been on sites such as this since January and we still haven't found a meet.
Hopefully one day! |
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OP look at the Meet/events section and try to attend a social near you. If you want to make friends that where you should go...and you will get verified. Who knows you might even click with someone.
Good luck. Other forumites have given you good feedback and i hope you won't join the legion of single guys asking for advice and ignoring it. These fabsters have taken precious time out of their busy lives to help you. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Poor spelling, and your bored????? What a turn off. Women are not on here to satisfy your boredom. There is nothing in your profile that stands out. You look Miserable in your pics plus your shy and bored? I'm Just being honest and not intending to insult or upset but your profile is simply dull, shows no confidence and miserable pics."
Agree with this, a smile in a picture makes a lot of difference.
Typing a profile in word and spell checking does not take much, if your on Google chrome, spelling a grammar show up straight away.
Your also at a disadvantage that you cannot accommodate and do not say why.
Maybe a name change would help.
If your heart broken and shy then you need to be confident to get meets.
This may seem negative, but you need a very much positive attitude to succeed on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Agree with this, a smile in a picture makes a lot of difference.
Typing a profile in word and spell checking does not take much, if your on Google chrome, spelling a grammar show up straight away.
Your also at a disadvantage that you cannot accommodate and do not say why.
Maybe a name change would help.
If your heart broken and shy then you need to be confident to get meets.
This may seem negative, but you need a very much positive attitude to succeed on here. "
oops me an my dyslexia should be spelling and grammar, not a. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember you messaging me now I have a bad memory but you stood out to me in a bad way I only looked at your profile name and instantly blocked you I mean come on heartbroken crys out desperate and baggage |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Good to see someone who is responding to advice positively. 
People take notice of how you write too. So make sure your proofread what you write and don't write in 'text speak'. I have dyslexia and it takes ages for me just to write something, as I'm forever proofreading. 
P |
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Spelling - Grammar - Punctuation
A 38 word profile yet you have several spelling mistakes.
And whats in it for the girl, why should she meet you?
Effort in = results out.
Work on your profile till it shines.
If in doubt ask a lady friend to help you with your profile!
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By *efreeMan
over a year ago
North Staffs |
"Poor spelling, and your bored????? What a turn off. Women are not on here to satisfy your boredom. There is nothing in your profile that stands out. You look Miserable in your pics plus your shy and bored? I'm Just being honest and not intending to insult or upset but your profile is simply dull, shows no confidence and miserable pics.
Couldn't have put it better myself..
Also it's Friend and Gentle not Frend and Gental.......spelling might seem like a really petty thing, but you'd be amazed how important it is.
"
If you want to be pedantic then it's you're and not your |
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OP firstly, welcome to Fabswingers the more genuine people who take an interest in their profile the better this site will work for them.. There's nothing wrong with being a newbie either as that is only a label that has a limited shelf life.. After all every person on here was a newbie once ....
Furthermore be confident, even if your not and remember this is NSA.. so dont mention this about past failed relationships as this is viewed unfavorably as sympathy seeking which most swingers a very sensitive to and shows that you are in fact 'strumming strings'..
Get yourself a fresh haircut, put on your glad rags, take some fresh pics and re-write your profile while your sat in all your good clothes.. This practice will help you write a more positive profile, because when you look good, you generally tend to feel good too and this will be reflected in your profile... |
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