FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Loose skin - a question
Loose skin - a question
Jump to: Newest in thread
We've a question that you might be able to help with. Mrs has done an AMAZING job of losing weight and getting fit. So much that's he's gone from a size 22/24 to a size 6/8 and now does 5/6 hour long spinning classes a week.
I'm really proud of her, however with that weight loss has come the dreaded loose skin. Now the exercise has got rid of a lot of it but a lot does still remain on her tummy, legs and arms and she's very paranoid about it, so much so that she feels no one could find her attractive once her clothes are off as it were.
So, I'd like your honest feedback on what you guys think about loose skin.? Does it bother you? have a look at our pics, they are well taken but do you think you'd like to meet us, hypothetically? I'm trying to convince her that she is attractive and that she can have confidence in how she looks.
Any other advice would be welcome even if it means telling me off for me writing this. K does know I'm asking this question.
N xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
 |
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Brilliant achievement. Can see what you mean in some of the pics...while it would not bother me - the problem is it bothers her!
I have seen cases (on TV) where you can get skin like this removed on the NHS....Might be worth enquiring? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We've tried the NHS, they'd pay £20k for a stomach band but not £10k for someone who lost it themselves with no cost to them. 
We do want the surgery but the costs are just too much for us at the moment to bear. Xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We'll done that's fantastic.
Does she do any weight training? Like body pump for example?
I go to the gym a lot and most of the classes that I went to mainly consisted of cardio, ( body Combat, metafit and hiit class) although I lost some weigh I did hit a wall and wouldn't lose any weight.
I strongly suggest using weights for toning, it works wonder's xxx  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Thanks, the key thing she found was to stop dieting, it's crazy but once she stopped obsessing about food and just eating anything she wanted but in moderation and started exercising the weight just flew off xxx
You can do it, just let go of the diet and eat whatever you want, just not lots of it and stop worrying!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Any woman who loses that amount of weight will have some saggy skin , as will childbirth .
The pics are cleverly done to not show any , and on a meet similar clothing would do it .
What worries us is her perception of herself on a meet . She should be happy with who and what she is , and we guess she isn't as you have yet to meet ?
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have the same problem i have lost 7 and a half stone and still have another two to go, the skin on my belly is loose and my boobs are a bit saggy, i do loads of exercise but the skin just wont tighten, i have stated this on my profile so men know what to expect if we meet as id hate them to be disappointed, so its now upto them if they contact me or not, there isn't much else you can do
well done on the weight loss x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We've had a couple of meets off of fab and it has been an issue, but it's getting worse.
She's really interested in meeting people but this is affecting her badly. I'm going to try the docs again but she's the sexiest woman I know of, not just in her body but especially her mind xxx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
She's does mainly spinning and we've taken as a couple to doing stomach exercises everyday, under the lose skin she has a very muscled and athletic body as you can probably see from the pics.
The problem is once the skin has loosened it only goes back so far xx but we are trying everyday and she's working with a trainer to target exercises to help more xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I was stuck at 10 st 7 for ages untill I switched up my work out routine from cardio to weight training x
I've gone from a size 14 to 8/10.
An now weigh 9st 7
An I lift proper weight not girlie ones he he xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
just goes to show we are never happy with what we got - some people will find us attractive while others wont - she looks great and says so much about her as a person xxxxxxxxxxx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Well done on the weight loss. How about getting some good uplifting body shape underwear that makes her feel sexy and flattering.
From my experience with my body men really Arnt that bothered
"
I know I'm trying to convince Mrs that no one else is and if they are we don't want to meet them xx
We've got lots of underwear, we can't stop buying it! Xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
That's an amazing achievement! As for loose skin, I think her pics look amazing and there are an awful lot of people on here who want a meeting of minds not just body's.
We all too often assume we're not going to be someone's 'cup of tea' when in actual fact we could be exactly what turns them on most |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I'm only speaking for me personally, but I find blemishes on a body sort of attractive. In the sense that it's someone with a real body, I'd find admiration in someone working that hard and losing that much.
Things like stretch marks, or a bit of a stomach or boobs are slightly saggy, or some loose skin or anything like that, I find it's a bodies way of saying they've been through something, the body has had experiences. It's natural, it's real, it's endearing and if they have the confidence in themselves about it, in my opinion it's sexy. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
We all too often assume we're not going to be someone's 'cup of tea' when in actual fact we could be exactly what turns them on most "
That's exactly what I'm saying! To be honest only a very people have perfect bodies but all of us want really what's in each other's mind, that sense of fun and playfulness that turns us on so much xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
" It's natural, it's real, it's endearing and if they have the confidence in themselves about it, in my opinion it's sexy."
Thank you it's important to understand that all of us are unique and not some image sold by the media. It's a damaging one and breaking that down can be tough x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I was stuck at 10 st 7 for ages untill I switched up my work out routine from cardio to weight training x
I've gone from a size 14 to 8/10.
An now weigh 9st 7
An I lift proper weight not girlie ones he he xx "
Well done! That's fantastic, K is going to her trainer soon for a program designed to tighten the skin further xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Congratulations!
I lost also weight from 26 to 18/20, so I know how hard it is.
And I am in half a way.
About skin problem - well I do have lots of parts of my body I don't like.
I am trying to mask it and I see your wife is also good about it, on her pics she looks hot, but I know her tricks
As for me I am seriously thinking when I achieve the final goal to get plastic surgery.
I heard many forefingers do it in Poland, and that's true we have very good surgeons, just you have to pick the right clinic. And way too cheaper then in UK. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Congratulations!
I lost also weight from 26 to 18/20, so I know how hard it is.
And I am in half a way.
About skin problem - well I do have lots of parts of my body I don't like.
I am trying to mask it and I see your wife is also good about it, on her pics she looks hot, but I know her tricks
As for me I am seriously thinking when I achieve the final goal to get plastic surgery.
I heard many forefingers do it in Poland, and that's true we have very good surgeons, just you have to pick the right clinic. And way too cheaper then in UK."
Yeah K has a real sense of shame over it and eventually surgery is a goal but it'll be a long time before we have the spare funds to do it.
The hiding tactics are there but I'm trying to get her to understand she looks beautiful however she appears xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *adybee77Woman
over a year ago
MAMOBA, miles and miles of bugger all (Aberdeenshire) |
She looks great, and I totally understand where she is coming from.
I've gone from a 24/26 and a 48GG down to a 10/12 and a 32DD (17 stone loss - although gaining now due to difference in my gym training) I've been lucky only to get loose skin on my tummy - and only a wee bit. I was advised to body brush every shower time after exercise to encourage blood flow, and to use lashings of moisturiser (I use nivea - cheap enough to ladle on and doesn't smell) and have been very fortunate with genetics too.
The GP may well do something if she can justify it on mental health grounds (which by the sound of it she could have a good case for - but each PCT is different) but she looks great!
Well done! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
its like stretch marks i see them as a natural result of my babies not as a blemish - the looseness is anatural result of your achievement - dont think ive worded that very well |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Of course she is.
Now I feel sexier then ever in my life, even sexier then in times when I was much slimmer.
And my skin was better.
It is all in the head.
But removing skin is quite a important thing for a woman, as it makes her much comfortable.
Really recommend you to check prices in Poland. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I would just like to say your wife looks amazing. Very hot! She should be proud of her body.
I would also like to say she is very lucky to have you. You sound very much in love and so proud of her. It's been lovely to read your posts x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
The GP may well do something if she can justify it on mental health grounds (which by the sound of it she could have a good case for - but each PCT is different) but she looks great!
Well done!"
Thank you!, we might try that route possibly as it seems the only one that might work and it IS affecting us xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Go to a club like The Vanilla Alternatives with no intention to play just stay in the bar, chat and be nosey. Look around, notice all the different shapes and sizes.... No one cares, everyone we have met just cares about having a good time...
Your wife really has achieved something great she has a right to feel proud. It's sad that she still feels a need to hide herself.
Xxx
P.s we would too   |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
An amazing job, well done her for sticking through it and you for supporting her. You should both be proud of your bodies, as you are both in a fit state and I'm sure people would be stupid to miss a night in with what comes across as a lovely couple |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
In THOSE latex outfits, with THAT figure?
I'd be on my knees in an instant!
Thing is, no matter how many complements we hand out (and we mean it, K looks fantastic) self image comes from inside. I wish you both all the very best in finding your way to being settled & confident, i know personally how damaging a sense of self doubt can be.
Mr is obviously very supportive of K and that really does help. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Awesome accomplishment, wishing her the best! I suggest meeting others in clubs where you dont have to play at all - then notice the response you get from people there. I imagine that people will be interested in you both and this may boost her confidence to the point she would feel right about meeting privately. You could also meet others socially and get immediate feedback that way too - in some ways its better than via the forums. Choose people wisely, and even discuss why youre meeting, to help gain confidence. Good luck! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Totally inspirational!
She looks amazing and I would be in awe of her determination.
I'm a weight trainer too and have lost a few stone, but still have a way to go and fairly anxious about my body.
That said, I'm very highly sexed, so that makes up for it
If you were closer, we would  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I just wanted to add....
There are lots of us who would prefer to meet with people that aren't totally perfect in the body department.
I mean, we totally appreciate a beautiful body, but, I think both hubby and I might feel a little intimidated!  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I have to say k looks amazing. She should be very proud of herself. We our own worst critics and I don't think, however much praise k receives, it will change her opinion, unfortunately. As a previous poster has said she looks very sexy in the latex and I'm sure she would out of it too! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
first may i say a very well done on losing all that weight,
however have you considered that she may have gone a bit far,
down all the way to a size 6, looking at your photos she would be better as a size 12, she would still look healthy and very fit but it would take up a lot of the lose skin which will make her feel better in her self.
sorry if this goes against the run of this thread,
you are being so very supportive in her weight lose, but has it become an obsession now, putting a few lbs back on would help with the excess skin issue |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"... the key thing she found was to stop dieting, it's crazy but once she stopped obsessing about food and just eating anything she wanted but in moderation and started exercising the weight just flew off ..."
You are not alone in coming to that conclusion... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Well done to you on your weight loss its hard work i have gone from size 34 down to 22 but have the excess skin and batwing arms to live with surgery is the only option but it is frightfully expensive i wish you all the best with whatever you decide to do and congrats to you again thats a fantastic achievement |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Go to a club like The Vanilla Alternatives with no intention to play just stay in the bar, chat and be nosey. Look around, notice all the different shapes and sizes.... No one cares, everyone we have met just cares about having a good time...
Your wife really has achieved something great she has a right to feel proud. It's sad that she still feels a need to hide herself.
Xxx
P.s we would too "
Thank you . we were possibly thinking of a party or club where the voyeur is just as welcome as the participant xx
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"An amazing job, well done her for sticking through it and you for supporting her. You should both be proud of your bodies, as you are both in a fit state and I'm sure people would be stupid to miss a night in with what comes across as a lovely couple "
Thank you I'm (mr) working hard to get fitter as well 2 stone down and gone from feeling like dying after 10 sit-ups to being able to do 100 without an issues. It certainly does wonders I must admit |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"In THOSE latex outfits, with THAT figure?
I'd be on my knees in an instant!
Thing is, no matter how many complements we hand out (and we mean it, K looks fantastic) self image comes from inside. I wish you both all the very best in finding your way to being settled & confident, i know personally how damaging a sense of self doubt can be.
Mr is obviously very supportive of K and that really does help."
Thank you and yes we love the latex it does amazing things to loose skin and have just ordered a catsuit and leggings from libidex today and we can't wait for them to arrive! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Totally inspirational!
She looks amazing and I would be in awe of her determination.
I'm a weight trainer too and have lost a few stone, but still have a way to go and fairly anxious about my body.
That said, I'm very highly sexed, so that makes up for it
If you were closer, we would "
Hehe distance is a bit of a pain . K is loving the support and messages we are getting at first she was highly dubious but now I think she's starting to realise we are all different and all of us have good bits and bad bits |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"first may i say a very well done on losing all that weight,
however have you considered that she may have gone a bit far,
down all the way to a size 6, looking at your photos she would be better as a size 12, she would still look healthy and very fit but it would take up a lot of the lose skin which will make her feel better in her self.
sorry if this goes against the run of this thread,
you are being so very supportive in her weight lose, but has it become an obsession now, putting a few lbs back on would help with the excess skin issue "
That's something we've discussed and have spoken to the doctor about but K does eat very well around 3k calories a day but her size is mainly due to her exercising rather than diet xx
Unfortunately weight can be a slippery slope so we are not sure we want to play with something that is working so far.
And don't worry about coming across as negative we'd love all feedback as long as it is constructive |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"
You are not alone in coming to that conclusion..."
People think we are crazy saying that but since we stopped dieting and worrying about food we became south healthier.
Clubs like WW want you to worry about food, they want you feeling guilty for having a treat (no matter what they say). It's part of their business model as I see it to ensue you put the weight back on.
That is not knocking anyone who has lost weight on those diets as K did but it also never helped her lose the obsession with food. As one doctor told us: thin people never worry about what they eat, larger people do. And for us at least it really clicked home and we've never looked back! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Well done to you on your weight loss its hard work i have gone from size 34 down to 22 but have the excess skin and batwing arms to live with surgery is the only option but it is frightfully expensive i wish you all the best with whatever you decide to do and congrats to you again thats a fantastic achievement "
Well done to you too! That's a fantastic achievement and as I say to K the loose skin is there because of what you were don't let it rule what you are now xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We've tried the NHS, they'd pay £20k for a stomach band but not £10k for someone who lost it themselves with no cost to them.
We do want the surgery but the costs are just too much for us at the moment to bear. Xx"
if she says it is causing major distress they do it they do at the hospital i work at xxxxx
and congratulations on a amazing weight loss xxxx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I have noticed that most replies admire the weight loss but few have answered the all important question the OP asked so again obsession with weight is ever present. Sad really but all too real.
Whatever you do, let her decide at her own pace. You seem supportive but I can't fail to feel there is something else troubling you. And I mean you the poster of the original message. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We've tried the NHS, they'd pay £20k for a stomach band but not £10k for someone who lost it themselves with no cost to them.
We do want the surgery but the costs are just too much for us at the moment to bear. Xx"
Get her on Embarrassing Illnesses as they seem to get it done free on there |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Firstly, well done you... you look great.
Secondly, for me, beauty is in the mind. If somebody has a good brain, can talk freely, appear confident, then others look straight past anything external.
Doesn't matter if you are skinny, fat, old, young, tall or short. If you are confindent in yourself then you attract people to you.
If you appear shy and nervous, then others then to shy away too.
Mr has spent years convincing Mrs to love herself. Now she accepts who she is, she has all sorts of fun. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
You need to be meeting with people who will encourage her and understand that her "loose bits" are part and parcel of the "story of her life" of who she is and how far she has come. People who will be attracted by her personality and courage and determination. The others are shallow, judgemental fools...would you want to meet them anyway, with or without the "loose bits"? X |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I think she looks great! Totally understand her being self conscious I have had three kids and although I'm curvy size 12 I hate my saggy tummy x
I just wear underwear that hides it and hope for the best x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I totally get her insecurities, I've lost 4 and half stone, my arms and legs are toned my stomach isn't, it used to bother me but now I think sod it I've had 3 kids, I'm proud of loosing all the weight I'm in my 40's so I'm never going to have the body I had before I had kids...
Also, my other half loves me no matter how I look, not once when I was bigger did he say I needed to loose weight I did it for me no one else.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Firstly, well done you... you look great.
Secondly, for me, beauty is in the mind. If somebody has a good brain, can talk freely, appear confident, then others look straight past anything external.
Doesn't matter if you are skinny, fat, old, young, tall or short. If you are confindent in yourself then you attract people to you.
If you appear shy and nervous, then others then to shy away too.
Mr has spent years convincing Mrs to love herself. Now she accepts who she is, she has all sorts of fun."
Totally agree with this. I think we get too hung up on looks and fail to get to know the person. Sometimes you get a very pleasant surprise! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
" she's the sexiest woman I know of, not just in her body but especially her mind xxx"
To be honest this is what she needs to hear this right there..I've lost 4 stone still want another 1.5 off I have mummy tummy and upper leg fat that won't go....but in all honesty as long as my hubby finds me the sexiest woman alive both body and mind I really don't give a dam...
Unfortunately you are going to come across the narcissistic arse holes that frequent fab that cross we all.have to bare...personally I think she looks amazing and it wouldn't be an issue if we met you both xxx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
First thing is well done. Secondly, whether it's because of the clever use of sexy undies etc, I can't see anything in your profile pics. The bad news is, as I understand it, exercise wont shrink the skin. We're just not that elastic, I'm afraid. Putting on muscle - like fat - may make it less obvious. But I'm not sure you want to go down that route.
What I'd say finally, is the sensible conversations you are having about this and the willpower already demonstrated means you have personalities that may more than compensate for a less than venus/adonis like body! |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
That is a huge amount of weight to loose but I think that tiny size 6 isn't going to help those folds of skin I think go up a couple of sizes that will look better and could try more better designed underwear that will not let the bits slip everywhere a tight body stocking??
Keep going back to the doctors no one should have to keep that it's unfair |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Go to the Drs and tell them how it is depressing you and that it is affecting your daily life. The nhs will do it then. I find it vial that they don't help people like you. I have much administration for your will and determination and none for those that have weight loss surgery.
Well done for your achievement yor pictures look great
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"We've tried the NHS, they'd pay £20k for a stomach band but not £10k for someone who lost it themselves with no cost to them.
We do want the surgery but the costs are just too much for us at the moment to bear. Xx"
I feel for her as I did the same avoided the band so don't qualify for surgery to the skin. Although having seen some of the scars people end up with i'm not sure which is better.
Hope it all works out in the end |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Hi guy's. Jools here. Although I'm not overweight, my first baby weighed 9lb 7oz and stretched my stomach as far as it could possibly go. After my second child, it went from bad to worse. If you look at our pic's I'm not full on naked in any of them. The reason being...I have a gross stomach, therefore I don't show it. I have a lot of excess skin and stretch marks which I do not feel should be put on show-my preference. I really worry and get myself so worked up about any meets we have. Mr j is constantly telling me how sexy I am but I I'm very insecure about the whole naked thing. We're currently going to the gym 4-5 times a week and I'm slowly starting to tone up but starting to get a small apron.
Well done K. Your pic's are amazing, you have a gorgeous figure (and amazing outfits)xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
