FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Single ladies and married men
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I'm about to embark on this scenario, despite my better judgment. I'm interested to know what experiences other single gals have had with married men. Did it get messy, nasty, purely NSA, a full blown affair or did he even leave his wife for you? I have no preconceptions about what will happen, but I'm interested to hear other ladies experiences. Please don't judge " Often they are politer, better manned and generally nicer however they will let you down more, delete profiles at a whim and can't stop the night. Eyes open though so many who are very convincingly single are not they are just good at keeping their private life to themselves. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"3 % of affairs develop into proper relationships. Not good odds really. " Unless you don't want a relationship, in which case they're good odds! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I'm about to embark on this scenario, despite my better judgment. I'm interested to know what experiences other single gals have had with married men. Did it get messy, nasty, purely NSA, a full blown affair or did he even leave his wife for you? I have no preconceptions about what will happen, but I'm interested to hear other ladies experiences. Please don't judge Often they are politer, better manned and generally nicer however they will let you down more, delete profiles at a whim and can't stop the night. Eyes open though so many who are very convincingly single are not they are just good at keeping their private life to themselves. " How on earth are they nicer? They are lying and deceiving the one person they claim to love more than anyone else. That's not how I define nice. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Big no for me too. Married guys always put their families first (quite rightly) so they're often unreliable. I always think karma is a bitch too and I wouldn't like it done to me so I won't so it to another woman." Hmm, that's exactly what I'm thinking. But the pull of the 'affair' is so great; so ridiculously exciting. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"A big no no for me! I met someone, a few years ago who convinced me it was a marriage in name only! Yeah right, what a crock of shit! Trust me! Needless to say he was sent packing lol " Same scenario my friend had,total bullshit, even when found out he denied it. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though..." The thought it is much nicer than the reality. You have to think 'what am I getting out of this, compared to what he is getting out of it?' Always being the other woman, yet you'll find often that they expect you to be completely faithful to them. I prefer to stick to having sex with men who (say they) are single. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Hmm. There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories. Looks like there hasn't been any, so I may save myself a whole heap of pain and knock this one on the head. The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though..." It depends on what you're hoping to achieve by embarking on this journey ~ if you're looking for no commitment & meeting up ad hoc generally on his terms then so be it. if you are after a relationship then it probably ain't gonna happen. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Hmm. There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories. Looks like there hasn't been any, so I may save myself a whole heap of pain and knock this one on the head. The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though... It depends on what you're hoping to achieve by embarking on this journey ~ if you're looking for no commitment & meeting up ad hoc generally on his terms then so be it. if you are after a relationship then it probably ain't gonna happen." I'm not sure. Honestly the primal being has just kicked in I just want to drag him back to my cave and leave it at that. But I know it's not that simple... | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though... The thought it is much nicer than the reality. You have to think 'what am I getting out of this, compared to what he is getting out of it?' Always being the other woman, yet you'll find often that they expect you to be completely faithful to them. I prefer to stick to having sex with men who (say they) are single. " Interesting - Yes. What are guys thoughts on you setting other men? ?? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Hmm. There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories. Looks like there hasn't been any, so I may save myself a whole heap of pain and knock this one on the head. The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though... It depends on what you're hoping to achieve by embarking on this journey ~ if you're looking for no commitment & meeting up ad hoc generally on his terms then so be it. if you are after a relationship then it probably ain't gonna happen. I'm not sure. Honestly the primal being has just kicked in I just want to drag him back to my cave and leave it at that. But I know it's not that simple..." Its actually quite simple. Are you really asking if its worth fucking up some poor womans life just so you can get your jollies? Are you really asking if you should trust a guy who will lie to someone he once claimed to love, and who will drop you like a hot shit and totally deny your existence when things go sideways? "There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories"... You already know the answer, yet you still want someone to remove your guilt by telling you "Go for it, it'll be ok". It won't be ok, at best, he's cheating on his wife, and you have some fun... at worst, it will trash his relationship, and she's going to get hurt.... I just hope there's no kids! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Hmm. There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories. Looks like there hasn't been any, so I may save myself a whole heap of pain and knock this one on the head. The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though... It depends on what you're hoping to achieve by embarking on this journey ~ if you're looking for no commitment & meeting up ad hoc generally on his terms then so be it. if you are after a relationship then it probably ain't gonna happen. I'm not sure. Honestly the primal being has just kicked in I just want to drag him back to my cave and leave it at that. But I know it's not that simple... Its actually quite simple. Are you really asking if its worth fucking up some poor womans life just so you can get your jollies? Are you really asking if you should trust a guy who will lie to someone he once claimed to love, and who will drop you like a hot shit and totally deny your existence when things go sideways? "There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories"... You already know the answer, yet you still want someone to remove your guilt by telling you "Go for it, it'll be ok". It won't be ok, at best, he's cheating on his wife, and you have some fun... at worst, it will trash his relationship, and she's going to get hurt.... I just hope there's no kids! " And yet you freely swap partners; tell me, what is the difference? I don't see how you can be so judgmental when you're swapping partners and condoning threesomes; it's no different! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"If its nsa fun you are after, go for it. If its a relationship, maybe try a different site? As there is another thread going about a married fem having fun, its interesting to see all the negative comments on this one!" NSA all the way. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Well if you want a relationship you're going to be disappointed. If you're truly after nsa I've met some great guys who I see regularly. It is sometimes tricky to arrange though. And as to moral issue, no one's forcing them, so it's their CHOICE not my fault. " Unfortunately that's not always the case. I came across a guy who was supposedly single but was surprisingly clingy for someone who wanted NSA fun. Eventually felt like a therapist and now that marriage is over | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Hmm. There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories. Looks like there hasn't been any, so I may save myself a whole heap of pain and knock this one on the head. The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though... It depends on what you're hoping to achieve by embarking on this journey ~ if you're looking for no commitment & meeting up ad hoc generally on his terms then so be it. if you are after a relationship then it probably ain't gonna happen. I'm not sure. Honestly the primal being has just kicked in I just want to drag him back to my cave and leave it at that. But I know it's not that simple... Its actually quite simple. Are you really asking if its worth fucking up some poor womans life just so you can get your jollies? Are you really asking if you should trust a guy who will lie to someone he once claimed to love, and who will drop you like a hot shit and totally deny your existence when things go sideways? "There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories"... You already know the answer, yet you still want someone to remove your guilt by telling you "Go for it, it'll be ok". It won't be ok, at best, he's cheating on his wife, and you have some fun... at worst, it will trash his relationship, and she's going to get hurt.... I just hope there's no kids! And yet you freely swap partners; tell me, what is the difference? I don't see how you can be so judgmental when you're swapping partners and condoning threesomes; it's no different! " Really? Everything I do, I do with the full knowledge and consent of Jayne, and vice-versa, no secrets, no lies, nothing hidden, no-one gets hurt, it's sexy, horny, fun, no-one is looking over their shoulder, worrying about getting caught out. I'm sure you can see the difference, you just don't want to admit you are wrong. Take responsibility for your own decisions and actions, and any possible ramifications, and stop looking for justification, the bottom line here is that it's morally wrong to actively engage in this sort of relationship, be it transient or something more full-on. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"There are literally 1000's playing away from home on here, so I don't understand the harsh judgmental comments. FFS you play with with other people's spouses every weekend at clubs specifically geared up for swapping, so I think it's a bit harsh to judge me on an affair that hasn't even taken place yet! " | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I'm about to embark on this scenario, despite my better judgment. I'm interested to know what experiences other single gals have had with married men. Did it get messy, nasty, purely NSA, a full blown affair or did he even leave his wife for you? I have no preconceptions about what will happen, but I'm interested to hear other ladies experiences. Please don't judge " What are you wanting? NSA it a relationship. If it's the first, then that's up to you, if you can live with it, go for it. If it's the later and you think there could actually be romance, then forget it. He's not going to leave a wife and kids for someone of a site. Is he really?! All the best, whichever you choose. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I'm about to embark on this scenario, despite my better judgment. I'm interested to know what experiences other single gals have had with married men. Did it get messy, nasty, purely NSA, a full blown affair or did he even leave his wife for you? I have no preconceptions about what will happen, but I'm interested to hear other ladies experiences. Please don't judge " I've met one for sex. sales rep. Knew i wouldn't meet him again. I don't want to meet married men. Awaiting backlash | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" I also wonder about the constant reference to married men. Many men live with partners and can technically describe themselves as single." Single means no relationship type attachments in my book, ie no wife/partner/girl-friend and opp gender equivalents. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. " Very true. It's the man that is choosing to cheat, not me. Why shouldn't I get what I want? And why shouldn't they. There are so many stale relationships out there, why not have some fun and some relief? I'm not responsible for their marriage / shit relationship / actions / vows. If I can keep it NSA, then I see no harm to be honest. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. " Wow just looked at your pics dan babe lucky married guys that's all I can say | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. Very true. It's the man that is choosing to cheat, not me. Why shouldn't I get what I want? And why shouldn't they. There are so many stale relationships out there, why not have some fun and some relief? I'm not responsible for their marriage / shit relationship / actions / vows. If I can keep it NSA, then I see no harm to be honest. " Then go through with it with a clear conscience and a light heart if you can honestly see no harm but I don't think you would have started this thread is you really believed that. I truly don't care what you do but as with the married men who ask similar questions it's the justification and assumptions made that grow wearisome. Just do it! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"As a single man I think it's wrong I have been in relationships and always been fiercely loyal. If a married guy feels the need to cheat then there is something wrong and I would stay away from this scenario " As a married lady I would have to say that I think you're wrong. My hubby has had 2 affairs that I know of and several one night stands. I am well educated and not abused but while I don't like what he's done I know that he loves me. He will never leave me simply because I tick all of his boxes. Some men are able to make a separation between naughty sex and real love. I do feel for the ladies that thought he was going to choose them over me but I also think they went into it with their eyes open. And really before I get ripped to bits for this sometimes the thrill of the chase takes over everything else. ..have fun and try to neither hurt or be hurt | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. " That's what it comes down to. If you can simplify it down; you want sex and he's the cheating toerag! He's the one who should be guilty. If you can separate the act from his situation then fine. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" And yet you freely swap partners; tell me, what is the difference? I don't see how you can be so judgmental when you're swapping partners and condoning threesomes; it's no different! " ooooooh..... me me me.... I know the answer to this one.... its called "consent"....... the fact that the other person isn't lying and is involved..... okay... one for the OP... lets play devils advocate.... put yourself in the role of the "other woman"..... how would you feel if you had what you are considering doing done to you and you had no idea it was going on so that they had blantanly lied? genuinely interested........ | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. " so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"There are literally 1000's playing away from home on here, so I don't understand the harsh judgmental comments. FFS you play with with other people's spouses every weekend at clubs specifically geared up for swapping, so I think it's a bit harsh to judge me on an affair that hasn't even taken place yet!" Yes, difference being... the spouses are there and joining in. A couple entering into something TOGETHER is a completely different scenario to one doing behind the others back. Having had it done to me in the past I am judging both of you. There are plenty of men on this site who are not married. Like someone else said, if you knowingly enter into something with a married man, it makes you just as bad as him. Would you do it with a friends husband? Or is it only okay to potentially devastate someone you don't know? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. " Wow | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though... The thought it is much nicer than the reality. You have to think 'what am I getting out of this, compared to what he is getting out of it?' Always being the other woman, yet you'll find often that they expect you to be completely faithful to them. I prefer to stick to having sex with men who (say they) are single. " | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"There are literally 1000's playing away from home on here, so I don't understand the harsh judgmental comments. FFS you play with with other people's spouses every weekend at clubs specifically geared up for swapping, so I think it's a bit harsh to judge me on an affair that hasn't even taken place yet! Yes, difference being... the spouses are there and joining in. A couple entering into something TOGETHER is a completely different scenario to one doing behind the others back. Having had it done to me in the past I am judging both of you. There are plenty of men on this site who are not married. Like someone else said, if you knowingly enter into something with a married man, it makes you just as bad as him. Would you do it with a friends husband? Or is it only okay to potentially devastate someone you don't know? " Absolutely harsh as!!!! Men and women are on here all doing it just the ones that are truthful with it are worth it, half the partners know it's happening too!!!! It's the ones that lie about it they are the wrongens!!!!! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" half the partners know it's happening too!!!! It's the ones that lie about it they are the wrongens!!!!!" cool, that's okay then.... fill your boots everyone | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me" I somehow doubt they would want your sympathy | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I do wish the marrieds and playing away, and the people who will play with them would just get on with it.... the justifications, the bleatings how unfair it is, stop being judgemental, and the grandstanding of their affairs is sickening at times. just shag him or her and blank the pain of the innocent out of your mind. " Thats assuming there is an innocent as many are also doing the same themselves. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I do wish the marrieds and playing away, and the people who will play with them would just get on with it.... the justifications, the bleatings how unfair it is, stop being judgemental, and the grandstanding of their affairs is sickening at times. just shag him or her and blank the pain of the innocent out of your mind. Thats assuming there is an innocent as many are also doing the same themselves." then my words don't apply. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I do wish the marrieds and playing away, and the people who will play with them would just get on with it.... the justifications, the bleatings how unfair it is, stop being judgemental, and the grandstanding of their affairs is sickening at times. just shag him or her and blank the pain of the innocent out of your mind. Thats assuming there is an innocent as many are also doing the same themselves. then my words don't apply." Its just that there are lots on here playing away not realising their partners are doing the same too. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I do wish the marrieds and playing away, and the people who will play with them would just get on with it.... the justifications, the bleatings how unfair it is, stop being judgemental, and the grandstanding of their affairs is sickening at times. just shag him or her and blank the pain of the innocent out of your mind. Thats assuming there is an innocent as many are also doing the same themselves. then my words don't apply. Its just that there are lots on here playing away not realising their partners are doing the same too." There are people on here doing all sorts of things and none of us can possibly know if everyone we meet is being honest but I for one am tired of the justification the asking not to be judged while making huge judgements and the general "I'm alright Jack, pull the ladder up mentality". Do what the bloomin' heck you want to do, you will anyway just don't keep bloody on about it and ask for other people to back up your decision. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"This topic of conversation, and peoples thoughts on this intrigues me!! I am married, I make no effort to hide the fact. My wife is aware, and does allow me to seek pleasure away from our home, but this is only due to health issues, and also the fact that we did swing as a couple, which helps me, as she is aware of the lifestyle. What is important to us, is honesty, and if all parties are aware, then for us that is fine. Playing behind your partners back is a little different, and maybe they need to be honest with themselves, but why should we judge? We are here for fun and friends, both in the bedroom, and out, but in my opinion, it is all about being honest from the start, I think then people can make their own judgement, without feeling awkward." genuine question, why do you say "why should we judge?" then say "people can make their own judgement" is judgement only allowable under certain circumstances, i.e. when the person being judged perceives it to be ok? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me" Another way you could look at it is that I was discreet about what he does and where he finds his fun right up until the end. I'm not in it to deal with angry wives. If it happens. I'll deny. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me Another way you could look at it is that I was discreet about what he does and where he finds his fun right up until the end. I'm not in ,it to deal with angry wives. If it happens. I'll rdeny. " "Denial, the last refuge of the scoundrel." Not sure who said it, but I think its apt. If you are adult enough to play with someone else's partner just for shits and giggles, at least have the decency to face the consequences if it all goes tits up, nothing worse than someone who tries to wriggle out of it by heaping lies on lies. Mind you, I suppose I'm asking too much by asking for decency in these cases! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Very interesting to see the difference of reaction on this thread compared to one a couple of days ago by a bloke wanting to gauge whether he should have a fling with a friend's wife. On here a lot of people seem to be saying go for it...have your fun while you can On there it was very much don't do it...be a good guy...you'll feel better about yourself for having done the right thing. Is it the friend thing that makes the difference? Or is it the gender? The bloke did say the friend was not really a very good friend...so I can only suspect it must be a gender thing...is his sexism? " I didn't see that thread but my replies on this issue are consistent and are about the relationship and not the gender. In the case of a friend though... I would call into question the definition of friend. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me Another way you could look at it is that I was discreet about what he does and where he finds his fun right up until the end. I'm not in ,it to deal with angry wives. If it happens. I'll rdeny. "Denial, the last refuge of the scoundrel." Not sure who said it, but I think its apt. If you are adult enough to play with someone else's partner just for shits and giggles, at least have the decency to face the consequences if it all goes tits up, nothing worse than someone who tries to wriggle out of it by heaping lies on lies. Mind you, I suppose I'm asking too much by asking for decency in these cases! " Cheating is cheating. The way I see it, Women that have Sex with a man they know is married are less clever than a Prostitute. She gets paid by married men for a Fuck. Will you? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"All I can say is "words fail me"! No wonder so many marriages end in divorce when nobody these days seem to understand the sanctity of their vows...just shocking! " What an odd thing to say! The sanctity of their vows would INCLUDE swinging then? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"All I can say is "words fail me"! No wonder so many marriages end in divorce when nobody these days seem to understand the sanctity of their vows...just shocking! What an odd thing to say! The sanctity of their vows would INCLUDE swinging then? " I think that's covered in the "for better or for worse" bit....swinging being the "better" | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"All I can say is "words fail me"! No wonder so many marriages end in divorce when nobody these days seem to understand the sanctity of their vows...just shocking! What an odd thing to say! The sanctity of their vows would INCLUDE swinging then? " A swinging couple decide as a unit that this is something they wish to embark on within their marriage and they both feel comfortable about doing it. What we are talking about here is a man having an affair with potentially several women without his wife knowing, therefore breaking the vows he made....the two things are completely different | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" And yet you freely swap partners; tell me, what is the difference? I don't see how you can be so judgmental when you're swapping partners and condoning threesomes; it's no different! ooooooh..... me me me.... I know the answer to this one.... its called "consent"....... the fact that the other person isn't lying and is involved..... okay... one for the OP... lets play devils advocate.... put yourself in the role of the "other woman"..... how would you feel if you had what you are considering doing done to you and you had no idea it was going on so that they had blantanly lied? genuinely interested........" Words of wisdom | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"When I see post like this it realy gets my goat! Cheating is cheating in any place if you choose to play with that person then feel free for whatever reason. However the genuine married swinger gets pulled into the argument and is judged. I hope that the people who have read this post understand the difference between married and cheating and married and swinging. " Yes, but if they admitted to grasping the (not so difficult) concept that cheating and swinging are completely different things, they couldn't use it as an excuse all the time. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. " This makes me really sad, is your confidence that low that you get kicks from the 'oooooo he likes me more than the woman he pledged is fidelity too'?? Come on girl!! Dont you think your better than that?? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. Very true. It's the man that is choosing to cheat, not me. Why shouldn't I get what I want? And why shouldn't they. There are so many stale relationships out there, why not have some fun and some relief? I'm not responsible for their marriage / shit relationship / actions / vows. If I can keep it NSA, then I see no harm to be honest. " You only know what he's told you... that might not be the truth. She may well be sitting at home trusting her husband completely and under the illusion that she's in a loving committed relationship. You are not responsible for his actions or what goes on in his marriage, but you ARE responsible for your own actions. You know he is married and you know there is always the chance she will find out and be devastated. I would not want to play a part in doing that to another person, and if you do, maybe you need to look at the type of person you are. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Pros and cons really. If you don't want a relationship they are great because they can't pester you, but if you do they are not so great because they can't meet regularly. Be prepared to stop wearing perfume, lipstick, and anything else that might transfer. No scratching, biting, or other marks. Usually daytime meets that are quite short. But if that suits you, go for it." Why it's a big no no from me. One man wanted me to shower in the gel his wife used and her perfume. He arrived with them and was sent packing with them too! If you're relying on a married man to fulfill any emotional need: more fool you. He's already shown himself to be a liar and a cheat. If that's all you think you're worth/deserve...knock yourself out! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"When I see post like this it realy gets my goat! Cheating is cheating in any place if you choose to play with that person then feel free for whatever reason. However the genuine married swinger gets pulled into the argument and is judged. I hope that the people who have read this post understand the difference between married and cheating and married and swinging. Yes, but if they admitted to grasping the (not so difficult) concept that cheating and swinging are completely different things, they couldn't use it as an excuse all the time." | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Hmm. There's no positive outcome here is there? Which I knew already, I just wanted to see if there had been any 'success' stories. Looks like there hasn't been any, so I may save myself a whole heap of pain and knock this one on the head. The elicit thought of it all is all so exciting though..." It's very exciting scenario...and if you click can go from Fuck Buddies to Friends With Benefits.... been there done it got the t shirt with a married lady.... just was sad when she & hubby moved away with his work... and he still doesn't know...(we email from time to time)... | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... " was the point of this thread to get people to give you the green light, only agree with your intent and pat you on the back why ask ? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me Another way you could look at it is that I was discreet about what he does and where he finds his fun right up until the end. I'm not in ,it to deal with angry wives. If it happens. I'll rdeny. "Denial, the last refuge of the scoundrel." Not sure who said it, but I think its apt. If you are adult enough to play with someone else's partner just for shits and giggles, at least have the decency to face the consequences if it all goes tits up, nothing worse than someone who tries to wriggle out of it by heaping lies on lies. Mind you, I suppose I'm asking too much by asking for decency in these cases! Cheating is cheating. The way I see it, Women that have Sex with a man they know is married are less clever than a Prostitute. She gets paid by married men for a Fuck. Will you? " You disgust me with your thinking. It happens all the time so grow up. And as for labelling me as lower than a prostitute, I haven't actually done anything, so where the hell do you get off? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... " Ok, so if he likes you so much, tell him to leave his wife and then you two can be together properly. As for the cheating/ consensual swinging question. If you can't see how playing WITH your partner there, with both members happy and participating is different to one person being lied to and cheated on, is different, then there is no point even continuing the discussion. As I said, its not a hard concept to grasp, I think you're just using it to try and justify something that I would hope you know is wrong. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"All I can say is "words fail me"! No wonder so many marriages end in divorce when nobody these days seem to understand the sanctity of their vows...just shocking! " Although there's a higher rate of divorce now than what it used to be it's not all due to cheating. It's more acceptable now for people to get a divorce if things aren't working out. Sticking it for the sake of the kids isn't always the best idea depending on their age cause an unhappy home isn't as good an idea as having divorced parents who're both happy. It's everyone's choice to decide on how to resolve the issues but you can't use that sanctity of their vows stuff | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... was the point of this thread to get people to give you the green light, only agree with your intent and pat you on the back why ask ?" Nope. If you can read properly, you'll see that I wanted to hear other people's experiences, not hear 'go for it'. There are 1000's of people on here playing away from home and I wanted to know their opinion, which doesn't include you by the way. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"which doesn't include you by the way." | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" Cheating is cheating. The way I see it, Women that have Sex with a man they know is married are less clever than a Prostitute. She gets paid by married men for a Fuck. Will you? You disgust me with your thinking. It happens all the time so grow up. And as for labelling me as lower than a prostitute, I haven't actually done anything, so where the hell do you get off?" Try not to get defensive darling, if you get found out you'll have this all the time, that's the reality people WILL judge you whatever the reasons and stories behind the situation, and without wanting to sound cruel he will probably (apologies for the assumption but it usually happens) run back to his wife with a slap on the wrist and you'll be tarred as a homewreaker by everyone that knows about it | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"if you put something in an open forum people will contribute. Their contributions might not be what you want to hear, they might not coincide with your _iews but one thing's for certain you can't stop them. You have been around the fora for a while you MUST have had an idea that this thread would go this way." And again what they said | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"if you put something in an open forum people will contribute. Their contributions might not be what you want to hear, they might not coincide with your _iews but one thing's for certain you can't stop them. You have been around the fora for a while you MUST have had an idea that this thread would go this way. And again what they said " Hello | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"if you put something in an open forum people will contribute. Their contributions might not be what you want to hear, they might not coincide with your _iews but one thing's for certain you can't stop them. You have been around the fora for a while you MUST have had an idea that this thread would go this way. And again what they said Hello " If I say hello back, does that constitute "hijacking a thread"? Xx | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"if you put something in an open forum people will contribute. Their contributions might not be what you want to hear, they might not coincide with your _iews but one thing's for certain you can't stop them. You have been around the fora for a while you MUST have had an idea that this thread would go this way. And again what they said Hello If I say hello back, does that constitute "hijacking a thread"? Xx" Yes xx so you had better not | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"if you put something in an open forum people will contribute. Their contributions might not be what you want to hear, they might not coincide with your _iews but one thing's for certain you can't stop them. You have been around the fora for a while you MUST have had an idea that this thread would go this way. And again what they said Hello If I say hello back, does that constitute "hijacking a thread"? Xx Yes xx so you had better not " Ok I won't then | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Fuck it, I'll just let you all continue fighting amongst yourselves." Several people have given you their experiences. Other people have given you their experiences of being on the other end of the situation. Maybe there aren't that many single girls who can share with you as there aren't that many who would get involved in that situation. I'm not sure what else you are looking for here? Its am emotive subject and people will have strong opinions on it... therefore causing debate and arguments. As someone else said (before he was told his opinion wasn't welcome) it comes across that you were looking for a bunch of people to come and tell you that their affair turned into an epic love story and they are still together now. If that's what you want from this guy, ask him to leave his wife first. If he wont, then find someone else. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I do wish the marrieds and playing away, and the people who will play with them would just get on with it.... the justifications, the bleatings how unfair it is, stop being judgemental, and the grandstanding of their affairs is sickening at times. just shag him or her and blank the pain of the innocent out of your mind. " I love you: this!!! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Fuck it, I'll just let you all continue fighting amongst yourselves." that's translation for "I didn't get the answers I was wanting/expecting.... so I have decided to stick my fingers in my ears and scream la la la till the noise stops" I tried asking you a genuine question... which was "how would you feel if you were the other woman on the end of what you are proposing?" if they are prepare to lie to the person they profess to love move than any other, then you should be no more nieve than to think they would do the same to you.... if you are prepared to knowingly be part of that lie.... then any consequence of that is on your head and your conscience but heck... just sex... right???? someone else touched on something else earlier... I would hope that you would have enough self respect, self esteem and dignity for yourself and say "I am worth much more than that" | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"... Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... " Are you for real??! You think there's no difference between cheating and swinging?! That is the dumbest thing I've ever read on here. And that's saying something! You asked for people's opinions, they gave them. Sounds like you just want to hear that all affairs end with the husband and mistress riding off into the sunset on a cloud of glitter. Good luck with that. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I do wish the marrieds and playing away, and the people who will play with them would just get on with it.... the justifications, the bleatings how unfair it is, stop being judgemental, and the grandstanding of their affairs is sickening at times. just shag him or her and blank the pain of the innocent out of your mind. I love you: this!!! " | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Fuck it, I'll just let you all continue fighting amongst yourselves. that's translation for "I didn't get the answers I was wanting/expecting.... so I have decided to stick my fingers in my ears and scream la la la till the noise stops" I tried asking you a genuine question... which was "how would you feel if you were the other woman on the end of what you are proposing?" if they are prepare to lie to the person they profess to love move than any other, then you should be no more nieve than to think they would do the same to you.... if you are prepared to knowingly be part of that lie.... then any consequence of that is on your head and your conscience but heck... just sex... right???? someone else touched on something else earlier... I would hope that you would have enough self respect, self esteem and dignity for yourself and say "I am worth much more than that"" I will answer your question seeing as you're so eager for a response. Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them. I won't treat this relationship any differently to any other; it's NSA and that's what we're all on here for after all. Of course I've been cheated on before, most people have; and whilst I didn't enjoy being in that position, my hate was geared towards my partner, not the 'other woman'. On another note, I hardly think a swingers site is the place to preach about the sanctity of marriage. If everyone stuck to the vows they made, this site wouldn't exist. Lastly, thanks for the dozen or so pm's I've received empathising with my predicament. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"... Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Are you for real??! You think there's no difference between cheating and swinging?! That is the dumbest thing I've ever read on here. And that's saying something! You asked for people's opinions, they gave them. Sounds like you just want to hear that all affairs end with the husband and mistress riding off into the sunset on a cloud of glitter. Good luck with that. " Such a naive perspective, and you obviously haven't read my original post. I haven't even slept with this man, let alone had any grandiose and pathetic ideas of coupledome - that's all your presumption / mind, not mine. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"... Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Are you for real??! You think there's no difference between cheating and swinging?! That is the dumbest thing I've ever read on here. And that's saying something! You asked for people's opinions, they gave them. Sounds like you just want to hear that all affairs end with the husband and mistress riding off into the sunset on a cloud of glitter. Good luck with that. Such a naive perspective, and you obviously haven't read my original post. I haven't even slept with this man, let alone had any grandiose and pathetic ideas of coupledome - that's all your presumption / mind, not mine." Actually one of the first things you wrote was to ask if anyone had a married guys leave their wives for them. You later went on to say you like him. A lot. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... " Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"You will always get posters telling you you shouldn't be doing it when the "married " subject is involved....but it matters not to anyone but you and the person you meet, it is yours and the married persons choice and it sounds like you have made it. On another note...on This morning tommorow there is a spot on about a website for " affairs" it could be interesting " there are a couple of reasons why most people in that situation wont head for those sites..... 1) too "close" to home... they don't want it too be staring them in the face and the consquences that come along with that 2) those site tend to charge money.... a lot of money... and since the likes of fab is free, heck why pay!!! and those swingers will have lower standards and shag anything...... i am being facitious in the last sentence | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"You will always get posters telling you you shouldn't be doing it when the "married " subject is involved....but it matters not to anyone but you and the person you meet, it is yours and the married persons choice and it sounds like you have made it. On another note...on This morning tommorow there is a spot on about a website for " affairs" it could be interesting there are a couple of reasons why most people in that situation wont head for those sites..... 1) too "close" to home... they don't want it too be staring them in the face and the consquences that come along with that 2) those site tend to charge money.... a lot of money... and since the likes of fab is free, heck why pay!!! and those swingers will have lower standards and shag anything...... i am being facitious in the last sentence" also I woud hazard a guess that the first place a suspicious partner would look would be a site specialising in affairs if the net appeared to be connected to their activities and a swingers site a bit lower down the list. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them. I won't treat this relationship any differently to any other; it's NSA and that's what we're all on here for after all. Of course I've been cheated on before, most people have; and whilst I didn't enjoy being in that position, my hate was geared towards my partner, not the 'other woman'. " that is about as cold a start to a reply as i can remember here for a while... I think the biggest difference between you and most is that most will remember the times they have been cheated on, and the subsecquent pain and say "i wouldn't want to inflict that potentially on anyone else!" but apparently...... not you! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? " Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it? | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them. I won't treat this relationship any differently to any other; it's NSA and that's what we're all on here for after all. Of course I've been cheated on before, most people have; and whilst I didn't enjoy being in that position, my hate was geared towards my partner, not the 'other woman'. that is about as cold a start to a reply as i can remember here for a while... I think the biggest difference between you and most is that most will remember the times they have been cheated on, and the subsecquent pain and say "i wouldn't want to inflict that potentially on anyone else!" but apparently...... not you! " It happens! Get over it... | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them. I won't treat this relationship any differently to any other; it's NSA and that's what we're all on here for after all. Of course I've been cheated on before, most people have; and whilst I didn't enjoy being in that position, my hate was geared towards my partner, not the 'other woman'. that is about as cold a start to a reply as i can remember here for a while... I think the biggest difference between you and most is that most will remember the times they have been cheated on, and the subsecquent pain and say "i wouldn't want to inflict that potentially on anyone else!" but apparently...... not you! " I know, I didn't even have a response to that and I'm not usually lost for words. I spend my years teaching kids to respect others and treat them the way you would want to be treated. Shame grown adults can't do it. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"It might be a swingers site but I'm sure a lot of us have morals and are not out to hurt anyone " I am but in a good way...a very good way | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"It might be a swingers site but I'm sure a lot of us have morals and are not out to hurt anyone I am but in a good way...a very good way " Oh I like being hurt "in a good way" | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them." That comment kind of says it all to me, but I had a feeling you felt that way before which is why I didn't comment. I don't expect to be able to change how you feel so all I will say is good luck to you. x | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"It might be a swingers site but I'm sure a lot of us have morals and are not out to hurt anyone I am but in a good way...a very good way Oh I like being hurt "in a good way" " | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it?" 'the pull of the 'affair' is so great; so ridiculously exciting' your words Why can't you have morals on a swingers site? I'm not hurting, lying to or deceiving anybody. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Fuck it, I'll just let you all continue fighting amongst yourselves. that's translation for "I didn't get the answers I was wanting/expecting.... so I have decided to stick my fingers in my ears and scream la la la till the noise stops" I tried asking you a genuine question... which was "how would you feel if you were the other woman on the end of what you are proposing?" if they are prepare to lie to the person they profess to love move than any other, then you should be no more nieve than to think they would do the same to you.... if you are prepared to knowingly be part of that lie.... then any consequence of that is on your head and your conscience but heck... just sex... right???? someone else touched on something else earlier... I would hope that you would have enough self respect, self esteem and dignity for yourself and say "I am worth much more than that" I will answer your question seeing as you're so eager for a response. Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them. I won't treat this relationship any differently to any other; it's NSA and that's what we're all on here for after all. Of course I've been cheated on before, most people have; and whilst I didn't enjoy being in that position, my hate was geared towards my partner, not the 'other woman'. On another note, I hardly think a swingers site is the place to preach about the sanctity of marriage. If everyone stuck to the vows they made, this site wouldn't exist. Lastly, thanks for the dozen or so pm's I've received empathising with my predicament. " If he has kids and you know that I personally think you shouldn't go for it. Every child will react differently if things were to backfire. I'm not saying it's guaranteed that the kids will embark on crime sprees but they could easily be like the teen who raped and killed his teacher some time last yr cause "his parents were getting a divorce." I'm not saying that the affair you're planning to have will be discovered or that it won't, the kids shouldn't have to suffer if it does backfire | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it? 'the pull of the 'affair' is so great; so ridiculously exciting' your words Why can't you have morals on a swingers site? I'm not hurting, lying to or deceiving anybody." The word affair was in inverted commas; understand? Morality means the standards of behaviour between right and wrong, and are withheld on this site. I could give numerous examples but I'm sure you understand what I mean. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me Another way you could look at it is that I was discreet about what he does and where he finds his fun right up until the end. I'm not in ,it to deal with angry wives. If it happens. I'll rdeny. "Denial, the last refuge of the scoundrel." Not sure who said it, but I think its apt. If you are adult enough to play with someone else's partner just for shits and giggles, at least have the decency to face the consequences if it all goes tits up, nothing worse than someone who tries to wriggle out of it by heaping lies on lies. Mind you, I suppose I'm asking too much by asking for decency in these cases! Cheating is cheating. The way I see it, Women that have Sex with a man they know is married are less clever than a Prostitute. She gets paid by married men for a Fuck. Will you? You disgust me with your thinking. It happens all the time so grow up. And as for labelling me as lower than a prostitute, I haven't actually done anything, so where the hell do you get off?" Nordic read again. Where does it mention you in my remark? It's the truth that a Married Man that wants a Fuck has 3 options. Be faithful, pay for a prostitute or find some slut that will open her legs for free and ignore the fact that she was probably at a friend's house the week before consolling a friend that got cheated on. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Okay, now your quoting what morality means. You answered your own question" I've stated what it means, not what I feel. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I do wish the marrieds and playing away, and the people who will play with them would just get on with it.... the justifications, the bleatings how unfair it is, stop being judgemental, and the grandstanding of their affairs is sickening at times. just shag him or her and blank the pain of the innocent out of your mind. " | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Okay, now your quoting what morality means. You answered your own question I've stated what it means, not what I feel." Don't assume that the majority of people on here don't have morals. What most of us do is out in the open and not wrong | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"There are literally 1000's playing away from home on here, so I don't understand the harsh judgmental comments. FFS you play with with other people's spouses every weekend at clubs specifically geared up for swapping, so I think it's a bit harsh to judge me on an affair that hasn't even taken place yet!" Yes but couples at clubs tend to be people in relationships already who both enjoy that whole senario, or its fuck buddies. Seeing a MARRIED man behind his WIFES back is completly different to a swingers club!! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
" Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them. I won't treat this relationship any differently to any other; it's NSA and that's what we're all on here for after all. Of course I've been cheated on before, most people have; and whilst I didn't enjoy being in that position, my hate was geared towards my partner, not the 'other woman'. that is about as cold a start to a reply as i can remember here for a while... I think the biggest difference between you and most is that most will remember the times they have been cheated on, and the subsecquent pain and say "i wouldn't want to inflict that potentially on anyone else!" but apparently...... not you! It happens! Get over it..." Oh dear, I was feeling a little bit sorry for the op earlier, how disappointed am I?? I really don't know how you can go around with an attitude like that?? Your actions affect others...... tread lightly through life unless you know you can change something for the better, karma exists.... I hope your never on the receiving end of something like this.... I think maybe look inside yourself and ask if you really need a married man to make you feel worthy, why not wait for someone who won't mind walking down the street with you | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... was the point of this thread to get people to give you the green light, only agree with your intent and pat you on the back why ask ? Nope. If you can read properly, you'll see that I wanted to hear other people's experiences, not hear 'go for it'. There are 1000's of people on here playing away from home and I wanted to know their opinion, which doesn't include you by the way." I am neither judgemental or uneducated but thanks for the direct insults. You asked for anopinion and I gave mine based on my experiences. A Prostitute provides a service for a price the Man pays it. A female that KNOWS a man is Married is acting as his Prostitute but giving her services for free. Who is ccleverer? One will end up richer, the other will end up hurting, feeling disgusted with herself and possibly beaten up. I am generalizing here not aiming at you personally. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"I've had many encounters with married and attached men. I like them better because they don't form an attachment to you and bombard you all the time with messages and are quite happy to leave you alone after. I also feel much naughtier knowing that at that moment they've chosen to see me rather than be with their wife/girlfriend. Only once I have I had a repercussion from it and I just denied all knowledge of the person At the end of the day it's not me that's cheating so why should I feel guilty. so the weasels way out.... when in doubt lie further and deny all knowledge.. compound all the deceit... blame him... all his fault the nasty pasty!!! Oh but i just "happened" to land on his cock.... its was all some frightful error!!! if you go into something knowing they are married and playing away then I believe you are as complicit in what happens next as they person doing it is.... if you are big enough to get involved knowingly, then you should be big enough to deal with the consequences, and big enough to hold up your hands if you get caught.... sympathy for getting caught.... different question... none from me Another way you could look at it is that I was discreet about what he does and where he finds his fun right up until the end. I'm not in ,it to deal with angry wives. If it happens. I'll rdeny. "Denial, the last refuge of the scoundrel." Not sure who said it, but I think its apt. If you are adult enough to play with someone else's partner just for shits and giggles, at least have the decency to face the consequences if it all goes tits up, nothing worse than someone who tries to wriggle out of it by heaping lies on lies. Mind you, I suppose I'm asking too much by asking for decency in these cases! Cheating is cheating. The way I see it, Women that have Sex with a man they know is married are less clever than a Prostitute. She gets paid by married men for a Fuck. Will you? You disgust me with your thinking. It happens all the time so grow up. And as for labelling me as lower than a prostitute, I haven't actually done anything, so where the hell do you get off? Nordic read again. Where does it mention you in my remark? It's the truth that a Married Man that wants a Fuck has 3 options. Be faithful, pay for a prostitute or find some slut that will open her legs for free and ignore the fact that she was probably at a friend's house the week before consolling a friend that got cheated on. " I can then only assume that you're referring to me as the third option? Nicely put, thanks (sic). | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it?" And.... "Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them." Surely the coldest response to any question about being involved in cheating, heartless is probably the best word to describe it. He's married, whether you have sex once, or several times, its still cheating, and, no matter how you paint it, it can't be "NSA", because HE'S MARRIED WITH KIDS!!! "A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it?" So, swingers have no, or low, morals, is that what you are inferring? Really? Next you will be telling us that you ended up with a profile ( a swinging profile!) on here by accident! If you had met him, dated, shagged, fallen in love and THEN found out he was married, I'd have some sympathy... but to go into this with eyes wide open.... AND seemingly hoping for something more (as it states in your OP), well, thats got to be the lowest of the low. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it? 'the pull of the 'affair' is so great; so ridiculously exciting' your words Why can't you have morals on a swingers site? I'm not hurting, lying to or deceiving anybody. The word affair was in inverted commas; understand? Morality means the standards of behaviour between right and wrong, and are withheld on this site. I could give numerous examples but I'm sure you understand what I mean." Well done, you can use dictionary.com Like I said, I hurt nobody. Nothing bad happens to another person as a consequence of anything I may do. I know the difference between right and wrong. Knowingly seeking relations with a married person and not giving a flying fcuk who you hurt in the process is wrong. I have never and would never do that. Please do not imply that because I choose to have an account on this site that I am the same as you. Its offensive. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it? And.... "Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them." Surely the coldest response to any question about being involved in cheating, heartless is probably the best word to describe it. He's married, whether you have sex once, or several times, its still cheating, and, no matter how you paint it, it can't be "NSA", because HE'S MARRIED WITH KIDS!!! "A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it?" So, swingers have no, or low, morals, is that what you are inferring? Really? Next you will be telling us that you ended up with a profile ( a swinging profile!) on here by accident! If you had met him, dated, shagged, fallen in love and THEN found out he was married, I'd have some sympathy... but to go into this with eyes wide open.... AND seemingly hoping for something more (as it states in your OP), well, thats got to be the lowest of the low. " Thank you for your unwanted judgmental _iews. I asked for experiences, not opinions. However, you're entitled to them, so I will let it slide. Anyone would think I'm the first woman to have sex with a married man (which I haven't even done)! What a load of old tosh, especially on this site! I really don't care what people think of me and my predicament, but thankfully the people with the real and valid input have pm'd me. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it? And.... "Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them." Surely the coldest response to any question about being involved in cheating, heartless is probably the best word to describe it. He's married, whether you have sex once, or several times, its still cheating, and, no matter how you paint it, it can't be "NSA", because HE'S MARRIED WITH KIDS!!! "A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it?" So, swingers have no, or low, morals, is that what you are inferring? Really? Next you will be telling us that you ended up with a profile ( a swinging profile!) on here by accident! If you had met him, dated, shagged, fallen in love and THEN found out he was married, I'd have some sympathy... but to go into this with eyes wide open.... AND seemingly hoping for something more (as it states in your OP), well, thats got to be the lowest of the low. Thank you for your unwanted judgmental _iews. I asked for experiences, not opinions. However, you're entitled to them, so I will let it slide. Anyone would think I'm the first woman to have sex with a married man (which I haven't even done)! What a load of old tosh, especially on this site! I really don't care what people think of me and my predicament, but thankfully the people with the real and valid input have pm'd me." People with real and valid input? People who told you that you're right and that you should go for it? Stuff the wife and kids! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"You will always get posters telling you you shouldn't be doing it when the "married " subject is involved....but it matters not to anyone but you and the person you meet, it is yours and the married persons choice and it sounds like you have made it. On another note...on This morning tommorow there is a spot on about a website for " affairs" it could be interesting there are a couple of reasons why most people in that situation wont head for those sites..... 1) too "close" to home... they don't want it too be staring them in the face and the consquences that come along with that 2) those site tend to charge money.... a lot of money... and since the likes of fab is free, heck why pay!!! and those swingers will have lower standards and shag anything...... i am being facitious in the last sentence" Hmmmm.....I'm not totally convinced about your reasoning Fabio because the affair type websites are huge business for the Internet dating corporations more so than their mainstream 'single' dating websites ~ so people must be signing up and paying the membership fees. Fabs is used for swinging, hence the title but it's also used for just NSA sex & dating. I think you'll find some people are on both affair sites and here, same as POF & here. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
| |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Just to make some points that some of you are assuming. - I haven't met this person through Fab - I have known him for a number of years (but not his wife) - To all the 'haters' out there, I've just merely asked for an opinion of any experience. - We like each other, a lot - We haven't done anything, albeit, yet... To the person that thinks I'm worse than a prostitute, you're the most judgmental person I've ever heard and you're an uneducated, 'jump the gun' person who's opinion is neither valid or worthy, not to mention very insulting. Oh, and to all the married swingers that say that the difference with an affair and consent are completely different; did you have sharing the wife / husband with other people written into your wedding vows? Thought not.... Nowt to do with wedding vows I'd feel as strongly about this whether it was a marriage, a civil partnership or just your bog standard relationship. You asked for an opinion on an open forum and us haters are giving you our opinion. Well I'm sure his wife likes him too. Why don't you ask her for her opinion on the matter? How would she feel if you fucked her husband? Why should I care? I don't know her, never even met her / know her name. I'm talking about NSA fun, not an affair. A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it? And.... "Why should I care about the wife / kids? I don't know them." Surely the coldest response to any question about being involved in cheating, heartless is probably the best word to describe it. He's married, whether you have sex once, or several times, its still cheating, and, no matter how you paint it, it can't be "NSA", because HE'S MARRIED WITH KIDS!!! "A swingers site is hardly the place to come over all moralistic now is it?" So, swingers have no, or low, morals, is that what you are inferring? Really? Next you will be telling us that you ended up with a profile ( a swinging profile!) on here by accident! If you had met him, dated, shagged, fallen in love and THEN found out he was married, I'd have some sympathy... but to go into this with eyes wide open.... AND seemingly hoping for something more (as it states in your OP), well, thats got to be the lowest of the low. Thank you for your unwanted judgmental _iews. I asked for experiences, not opinions. However, you're entitled to them, so I will let it slide. Anyone would think I'm the first woman to have sex with a married man (which I haven't even done)! What a load of old tosh, especially on this site! I really don't care what people think of me and my predicament, but thankfully the people with the real and valid input have pm'd me." I did try and pm you but I'm out of your age range, my experience isn't quite the same as I didn't know he was married but turns out I wasn't the only one and I was (still am) guilt ridden, confidence shattered and wondering whether I'll ever be able to trust anyone again. While he went back to his wife to play happy families with her placing the blame solely on me. | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Real and valid input. Thanks a bunch. Appreciate that " Don't take it personally! You just didn't say exactly what she wanted to hear! | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Real and valid input. Thanks a bunch. Appreciate that Don't take it personally! You just didn't say exactly what she wanted to hear!" Oh I didn't, I'm obviously a married woman on here with no morals | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |
"Real and valid input. Thanks a bunch. Appreciate that Don't take it personally! You just didn't say exactly what she wanted to hear!" | |||
Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) |