FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Should we or shouldn't we?
Should we or shouldn't we?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By *hilnNey OP Couple
over a year ago
middlesbrough |
Hey peeps,
We met a couple (not swingers - as far as we know) about a year ago and since then we've become really good friends. We see them 3-4 times a week and have them round for dinner, movie nights and go out clubbing together etc.
Me and hubby both feel there's a sexual chemistry between us all and they're both absolutely gorgeous! Should we try and spice up our friendship or just keep it as a fantasy?
We know there's a risk of losing them as friends but then again they might be up for it and it could be one of the sexiest nights of our lives?
Has anyone had this type of experience in the past? And is there any way to kind of test the water without losing them as friends? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Maybe next time over dinner broach the subject of wife swapping not necessarily swinging, 3 sums etc and see what their answers are but just be careful if you don't want to lose their friendship, they may like you too but have drawn a line between the two of you and value friendship above sex |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hilnNey OP Couple
over a year ago
middlesbrough |
But how do we bring it up without sounding too obvious?
And we were thinking the same thing about them drawing the line to preserve our friendship. But it's also a niggling worry that they're discussing the same thing but don't know how to approach it either lol!
Is it possible to stay this close as well as having a sexual relationship or is it a recipe for disaster?  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
what you need to dois peruse the TV listings for a program about wife swapping/swinging an just happen to make sure they are
a) Invited over the same night
b) Just happen to have that particular channel on
Provides a natural talking point |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Tricky situation, I'd be worried about losing a good friendship but if you're all adults and can add fun in to the mix then go for it.
Hard subject to bring up, but there are ways, mention a TV show/ reading an article. Good old fashioned truth or dare...
Whatever happens, hope it works out well for you
Ruby x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Sounds like time for a drinking game.
When all pleasantly tipsy. Suggest the I've never game.
One person says I've never been on an 18 to 30s holiday. Everyone who has takes a drink.
See where they want to steer it. I've never sunbathed nude etc.
I've never flashed my tits. Could lead to asking for a replay. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hilnNey OP Couple
over a year ago
middlesbrough |
Thanks for all the helpful suggestions guys. I'll have to start browsing the TV mags and see if there are any shows coming on 
I like the idea of the drinking game. Me and hubby discussed something similar but didn't know if they'd wake up the next morning and regret it. Figured sober might be the best option, but that might be harder to get them in the sack *-
We'll aim for slightly tipsy and hope it works out |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *igeiaWoman
over a year ago
Bristol |
Mention someone at work who you've heard is into swinging but 'doesn't seem the type' without saying what you personally think of it - then see where their reaction/the conversation leads... |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Mention someone at work who you've heard is into swinging but 'doesn't seem the type' without saying what you personally think of it - then see where their reaction/the conversation leads..."
This or a conversation about things that have been on the telly, like 'my granny the escort' - say my goodness the things people that get up to, you wouldn't expect that from certain people. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Mention someone at work who you've heard is into swinging but 'doesn't seem the type' without saying what you personally think of it - then see where their reaction/the conversation leads..."
Personally I think this suggestion the best  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
It sounds like you've got a good friendship...why not go straight in through the front door and just say you're thinking about going to a swinging club or something like that. It needn't involve them, it could just be theory...and to see what they feel about swinging...but obviously the fact that you're confessing this to them could either be because you're good friends or because you fancy them. You really don't need to clarify this...just let it sit with them a while. If they react badly to the idea of swinging you can always back pedal and say you've thought about it and decided not to...just to save the friendship lol. Probably bad advice but that's probably what we'd do with really close friends who we're like minded i.e. a bit hippy and open minded like us.
As for whether having a foursome with your best friends is a good or bad thing...don't look at us...we have absolutely no idea lol But good luck
p.s. you should also ask yourselves how strong your friends marriage is. you wouldn't want to introduce them into swinging and end up being the catalyst for the collapse of their relationship...just a thought |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"
p.s. you should also ask yourselves how strong your friends marriage is. you wouldn't want to introduce them into swinging and end up being the catalyst for the collapse of their relationship...just a thought "
this. I wouldn't want that on my conscience. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hilnNey OP Couple
over a year ago
middlesbrough |
Thanks for all your advice guys it's a great help. We don't want to be the reason their relationship breaks down so I think we're going to play it strategically - dropping the odd hint here and there and see if they take the bait. I think the first thing we'll do is try and get onto the topic of threesomes, bisexuality and experimentation and see how they react to that. If they have a positive attitude towards it we'll start phase two  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *ovigalWoman
over a year ago
Dublin |
"Thanks for all your advice guys it's a great help. We don't want to be the reason their relationship breaks down so I think we're going to play it strategically - dropping the odd hint here and there and see if they take the bait. I think the first thing we'll do is try and get onto the topic of threesomes, bisexuality and experimentation and see how they react to that. If they have a positive attitude towards it we'll start phase two "
Be sure to let us know how it goes....xx
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Hey peeps,
We met a couple (not swingers - as far as we know) about a year ago and since then we've become really good friends. We see them 3-4 times a week and have them round for dinner, movie nights and go out clubbing together etc.
Me and hubby both feel there's a sexual chemistry between us all and they're both absolutely gorgeous! Should we try and spice up our friendship or just keep it as a fantasy?
We know there's a risk of losing them as friends but then again they might be up for it and it could be one of the sexiest nights of our lives?
Has anyone had this type of experience in the past? And is there any way to kind of test the water without losing them as friends?"
NO |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
What about casually asking them if they heard a out clubs in the North East? See what their reaction is. Especially recently when Vivente has been in the news. If they're like you and tentatively has been browsing around about this lifestyle, they would know and will probably have an opinion on it.
Of they say yes, they've heard abt the clubs, then mention both of you are thinking of going on a night to see what the club's are all about, and whether they'd like to join on that night?
Depends on their answers, you certainly can steer the conversation a lot.
Personally I think mentioning abt threesomes would be slightly risky, as they might only want to consider soft swing first etc.
Whatever it is, keep us updated here..
Alex |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I recently found out my good friend and her husband have been swingers longer than we have. It has only made our friendship better since we dont have to hide it and we have had a little fun together as well. Now if we were good friends with a couple who have never done it before I would not want to be their first even if they wanted to because I wouldn't risk the friendship if they found it wasn't for them. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *hilnNey OP Couple
over a year ago
middlesbrough |
We've never done the club scene so we wouldn't actually be fibbing by saying we've never done it before lol.
I like that idea. And I'm in two minds now as to whether to be their first or not. I can see the problem if it turns out they don't like it, but at the same time if they have sex with another couple and decide they don't like it we'll miss out 
Need to talk tactics with the hubby  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
The best would be to visit the club with them in tow. Once there the four of you might fancy a play amongst yourselves, or better still, join in someone else's fun. You might even have afters between the four of you when you get home... That's certainly a win-win situation...
Alex |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
I would go for it you may lose them as friends but not likely I think they would understand and shrug it off,
if you don't you could be missing out on an even greater relationship with naughty benefits ,
love to know if you do go for it |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I would make 100% sure that there is chemistry there. Sometimes inocent flirtation can be just that! Simply just a bit of fun and you should be careful not to misread it.
A few carefully placed questions or conversations should out which way your friends steer sexually but again, just because they are being open doesn't mean they want to jump into bed.
Just because people talk the talk doesn't mean they walk the walk. Good luck though x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *od!Man
over a year ago
Coventry |
"Thanks for all your advice guys it's a great help. We don't want to be the reason their relationship breaks down so I think we're going to play it strategically - dropping the odd hint here and there and see if they take the bait. I think the first thing we'll do is try and get onto the topic of threesomes, bisexuality and experimentation and see how they react to that. If they have a positive attitude towards it we'll start phase two "
Or novel concept as you don't want to be the reason their relationship breaks breaks down you leave things as they are and do nothing ... Good friends are hard to come by so why ruin what you already have??? |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *not69Man
over a year ago
Lancashire |
Next time they pop round for a social, guys watching world cup, ladies in kitchen sorting drinks or food. Conversation goes like this.
Wife: Hubby's wants us to go to a swingers club but I don't know. What would you do if your hubby asked.
Neighbours wife: oh you should go, try club x it's really good, cone with us sometime if you want? But we won't be your first coz we don't want to be responsible.... Etc etc.
Wife: oh your swinger's too!!! Oh believe me you won't be our first.
At that point wife returns to the lounge wearing just her sexy undies and straddles neighbours hubby saying to her hubby "neighbours wife is waiting for you in the kitchen"
Let the fun begin
If only life was so simple |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
