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single males & condoms

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By *SweetVioletx OP   Woman  over a year ago

Liverpool

Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Not just single men male from a couple tried it once.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X "

With any further meets I would give the guys a warning. Tell them if they try and fuck you minus a condom the meet stops straight away.

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By *o new WinksMan  over a year ago

BSE

As long as you are firm with the rule then it shouldn't be a problem.

I personally hate the things and getting 'em on is a faff. Have you thought about putting one on them at the end of your bj. That is always far far more fun.

No risk of them trying to sneak an unfettered one in the back door when you arent looking either

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think you have been unlucky. Just make it very clear you always play safely and they should surely get the message ?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I trust no-one, I always look or feel and check they have one on. I'm not surprised some men try. If they did try, the meet would be over. I'd just leave.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've had that happen before. I've had guys try to talk me out of it, and I've had guys break them putting them on.... seemingly in hopes that i'd not have more and just go bare. i always carry loads, though lol. there are others though who stop and ask if I'm ready and where I've put the condoms, and a few who even brought their own! just tell them straight that if they pull that, the meet ends there.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

It's something I've noticed a number if times too so it's not that unusual.

Also the number of guys that turn up without condoms to a meet and use the "oh, well shall we just carry on without" the look of disappointment when I pull out my wide collection is a sight to behold and the "oh you have some"

You also rarely see guys carrying them in a club.

I think every one would admit sex is better without them but in the lifestyle we lead they are a necessary evil.

I had one guy tell me it was a week to his payday and he couldn't afford them....I suggested popping into the GUM and pick some up for free and I never heard from him again.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"

I personally hate the things and getting 'em on is a faff. Have you thought about putting one on them at the end of your bj. That is always far far more fun.

"

What if you don't give a BJ before having the penetration....I don't always give one up front, I work on a you do it 1st and I'll return the favour later rule.

Also I have long fingernails so won't put them on for someone in case I tear it or scratch his cock.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just don't let them get near you without a condom on. Granted it feels lovely without, but not worth the risk!

P

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

if they try that on the meet ends

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Shocking behaviour....

Actually it's a big turn-on when you hear the question "Have you got a condom?".

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By *dventuroususCouple  over a year ago

sunderland

There are many men on here that preach safe sex only but in reality its different, this I have witnessed, the worst are the ones that do use them that think they are bullet proof and dont need regular testing.

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"As long as you are firm with the rule then it shouldn't be a problem.

I personally hate the things and getting 'em on is a faff. Have you thought about putting one on them at the end of your bj. That is always far far more fun.

No risk of them trying to sneak an unfettered one in the back door when you arent looking either "

They taste foul usually, even the flavoured ones. I don't like putting them on that way and I don't see why I should just to make it better for him.

Frankly, if he wants to get his end away, he gloves up. It's that simple. It's a nuisance and it feels better without but it's the sensible, responsible thing to do and the sooner these men accept that, the better.

As for there being no risk if the woman puts it on herself, by bj or otherwise, it's not unknown for men to remove them, or try to get away with removing them part way through.

I've even heard of guys whipping them off just as they're about to cum to give the woman no time to realise or prevent them cumming inside her. It's not even as if by that stage it's going to affect how it feels much.

I'm always nervous of doggy simply because it's easier for the man to "lose" the condom without me noticing.

If I make it clear in advance that I want condoms used, and they agree to the meet knowing that, there should be no "forgetting" to bring any, ridiculous excuses or argument. It's disrespectful of the set limits and to me.

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"if they try that on the meet ends "

Agreed. Respect my limits of fuck the hell off.

Who's to say they won't ignore other limits, or the word "no" or "stop"?

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By *rsIdiotWoman  over a year ago

Bedworth

Had one guy try this in a club. He tried to whip it off 3 times and attempt penetration without. Numpty thought I wouldn't check.

He was asked to leave by the management after they heard me getting a little angry with him but it put me off that particular club and I've not yet been back.

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By *o new WinksMan  over a year ago

BSE

I did say at the ENDof the bj...not during or as part of.

I wouldn't ask a lady to do that. A slow unrolling over a wettened cock......with a twinkle in the eye....is a whole different ball game.

As for the tossers who try to remove them.....they should be outed on here. Named and shamed is the only way to stop that cuntish behaviour !!

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk


"I did say at the ENDof the bj...not during or as part of.

I wouldn't ask a lady to do that. A slow unrolling over a wettened cock......with a twinkle in the eye....is a whole different ball game.

As for the tossers who try to remove them.....they should be outed on here. Named and shamed is the only way to stop that cuntish behaviour !!"

Ah I see. I apologise for misunderstanding.

I have, in the past rolled them on with my mouth but I don't much like it and no longer do it.

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By *jandjbCouple  over a year ago

Nr Manchester

My OH and I have only been swinging for 7 weeks. We asked a friend about the "bracelet" he was wearing. We now have one each, different colours, each holding a few condoms and packets of lube. They are sold on Amazon as walker's bracelets. They have a zip up pocket.

However was a bit surprised in a club recently when a man we didn't know who had joined us playing in the couples room in a club and was about to enter my OH (spit roast style) asked the room generally for a condom. I think he was a bit surprised when both my OH and I started to unzip our bracelets! I was a bit concerned but actually the play was so good that he came even though he admitted afterwards that he hadn't intended to, and like a decent chap he removed himself carefully holding the condom in place.

I agree with everything said in this thread. If my OH was playing alone (we only do same room full swap) I would recommend she takes extra care after reading this - especially if in the doggy position.

DJ

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By *SweetVioletx OP   Woman  over a year ago

Liverpool

Thank you everyone for your thoughts and advice. At times I have felt like I was holding a sex ed class and not what was supposed to be a night of filth.

I agree with everything said and I am so very careful but will now end up having to read the t's & c;s of a meet before any clothes are removed.

Just a shame that single males are making it even harder for themselves xxx

Take care and be safe xxx

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By *ee VianteWoman  over a year ago

Somewhere in North Norfolk

Take a pair of braces with you to meets and attach them to the condom to ensure it stays where it should be

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

sadly this is more common than it should be

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By *oodmessMan  over a year ago

yumsville

I hear it a lot... but then again, the amount of women and couples who have tried to fuck me bare (knowing I have condoms) is quite astounding too.

You do see a bit of a shocked face when I pull the condoms out - have to say.

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By *illyCouple  over a year ago

Coventry

Just read this. And we're actually surprised this happens. Something to think about in the future.

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By *oodmessMan  over a year ago

yumsville


"Just read this. And we're actually surprised this happens. Something to think about in the future.

"

all you have to do is have a stash of condoms and job's done. Or, if you dont like their attitude towards unprotected sex - tell them to bugger off. It does happen quite a bit so I hear

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By *hole Lotta RosieWoman  over a year ago

Deviant City

Sadly it has happened on many occasions and mostly with couples. The male half will immediately try and enter bare. Even when I offer my condoms they have put them on and the sneakily removed them.

It also amazes me that when chatting to others, they think that if they use a condom, they never need to go to a GUM clinic. Also, the amount of people that have never heard of a GUM clinic. Baffles me and makes me so wary now.

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By *SweetVioletx OP   Woman  over a year ago

Liverpool

Sad to hear it is a common issue.

I always have a good supply so when the excuse comes of "oh I don't have any" I tend to say well I do but you don't have a chance now. At the least they should have the decency to ask on the off chance they met someone who is willing to take the risk.

Yes no matter how safe you are regular checks are a must x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

bareback with a stranger sounds horny as hell, BUT STUPID ALWAYS WEAR PROTECTION!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X "

That is not on at all .. Sleeve up at all times I believe ..

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

We invited a guy to our hotel for some fun a while ago, was a meet a short notice admittedly but had arranged few hours earlier plenty of time for him to get condoms.

He turned up began playing with Bev looked surprised when I asked if hed brought condoms to which he replied no, soI gave him a couple of ours, he obviously didnt want to use as when he finished oral he tried to slip inside Bev, I stopped him and said put condom on, he put it on but only over his Bellend, I said thats no good right on, he pulled a little further and attempted again, this time a bit miffed I said pull it right on or its game over, he couldnt get hard on then so left in a huff, I think bareback was his thing but no respect at all for what we wanted, people like this make me mad.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

In the interest of equality when I was playing as a single a large amount of females would offer the opportunity of playing bareback.

Sexual health is one of those topics where many people say what they know others qant to hear.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"if they try that on the meet ends

Agreed. Respect my limits of fuck the hell off.

Who's to say they won't ignore other limits, or the word "no" or "stop"?"

im the same with my profile too.

if they cant understand my profile and respect it, how would they be ona meet

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/06/14 13:18:36]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X "

agree with one of the previous when the lady asks if you have a condom.. Big turn on

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

[Removed by poster at 06/06/14 13:39:37]

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Such a shame so many single guys are giving us all a bad reputation, by being so stupid.

I always put my own health and any sexual partners health above everything. In fact have I met couples on more than one occasion that asked me if I mind NOT using one!

I made my excuses and left and I'd like to think plenty of other guys would do the same! so we are not all tarnished with the same brush

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I don't have this problem as im quite happy to be fucked bareback just as happy as I am to be fucked safely.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Well if they can not respect your preferences then the do not deserve the your time of day in my opinion. They are playing with your health as well as there own and its plain bang out of order.

If they try like others have said meet ends get them to sling their hook and find someone willing to play by your rules.

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By *erkshireMan123Man  over a year ago

Devizes


"Such a shame so many single guys are giving us all a bad reputation, by being so stupid.

I always put my own health and any sexual partners health above everything. In fact have I met couples on more than one occasion that asked me if I mind NOT using one!

I made my excuses and left and I'd like to think plenty of other guys would do the same! so we are not all tarnished with the same brush"

I'm with you on this. I have had women asked me not to use one. That's when the alarm bells start ringing for me and insist on using one. Can't be too safe in my eyes.

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By *lan43sumMan  over a year ago

Leicester

Safety first and guys should respect 100% a lady's wish.

Is it true ladies that you can tell the difference between a gloved cock and a bare one when its thrusting in you? (leaving aside the aftermeth/creampie)?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Safety first and guys should respect 100% a lady's wish.

Is it true ladies that you can tell the difference between a gloved cock and a bare one when its thrusting in you? (leaving aside the aftermeth/creampie)?"

Bev is not here to reply, but she does tell me that ordinery condomsso dry her pussy for some reason, guys who use non latex condoms feel much better but she says she can feel the difference, obviously bareback is better but safe sex is better for health so she never allows anyone in bareback other than me, and I'dnever contemplate saex with a stranger without wearing a Condom.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Safety first and guys should respect 100% a lady's wish.

Is it true ladies that you can tell the difference between a gloved cock and a bare one when its thrusting in you? (leaving aside the aftermeth/creampie)?"

Well I can...I also find it annoying that men often don't bring their own and there is an expectation that I will have some. All types don't fit all guys equally well and I am not about to have a range in stock just in case.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"sadly this is more common than it should be "

had a guy do it to me....

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By *aveandkate35Couple  over a year ago

telford

It happens a lot, but that's the end if play I'm our book.

If a guy is prepared to risk it, how many times has he got lucky? Ergo, a guy who is trying it with us, in our eyes, is a higher risk and therefore a none starter.

Yes I know blah blah you can never be 100% but it's wise to try and stack the odds in your favour.

D

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I will only play with a condom on but have played with women who want it off (even though their profile says safe sex only).

I refused and carried on covered. I've even had a women in a couple ask for bareback and her husband was fine w her asking!!

On a side note - ladies, a lady above said it feels better for her. Does it really?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've exchanged messages with quite a few on here and been asked what do I think of bareback...my answer has always been the same 'I love it but it's not worth the risk' a lot on here don't seem to recognise the dangers or implications that can come from it or worse....they don't give a damn about their own or anybody else's life. After I have expressed my views they usually just cut any further discussion or contact. Now the interesting thing about this is the fact they all stated 'safe sex only' in their profiles and they all left the safe sex question tll the last minute. As for not bringing their own conforms, I don't have a choice, I have to get mine off the internet because most shop outlets only stock the usual range and they either won't go on without cutting off the circulation or they just split. I'm not a genius so 'no' I don't know what the answer to this aversion to condoms or respecting other swingers terms or conditions is.......I do know it's a little worrying that it's seems so common though. Well.....sorry, that was quite a long one(as the actress said to the bishop.

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By *romiscuousNSACouple  over a year ago

Trafford Area


"Shocking behaviour....

Actually it's a big turn-on when you hear the question "Have you got a condom?"."

I agree. It's the time when your being invited in

When me and my wife used to have meets (off the site) she would usually tell the bloke he wears a condom otherwise he's paying for a child until they reach 16 haha that scares them into willingly wearing one

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I don't have this problem as im quite happy to be fucked bareback just as happy as I am to be fucked safely. "

It's good that you are honest, but don't you worry about the possible consequences?

Also do you get checked after every meet for peace if mind?

Interested to know more about how you monitor your sexual health as an open bare back player.

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By *umpkinMan  over a year ago

near the sounds of the wimborne quarter jack!

Strangley, my former FWB was on the round bed in Chams and I was kepping watch. EVERY guy who she let play with her respected my instructions to use a condom. Perhaps it because I was there?

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By *wned EmCouple  over a year ago

nuneaton

Another thing to watch out for in group play situations is a guy fucking one woman then withdrawing and trying to enter another without changing the condom. Some guys hear the message 'wear a condom' but forget it needs to be fresh one for every partner!

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By *am123Man  over a year ago

essex chelmsford

i dont get it why would you try that.

its for your own safety aswell, i wouldnt put my thingy in anyone without a condom unless it was long term relationship

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Unacceptable behaviour. Full stop.... I hope you have since blocked them and warned any friends!

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By *hetalkingstoveMan  over a year ago

London

Trying to sneak in an un-gloved cock against a woman's wishes is incredibly shitty behaviour. Guys should get banned from clubs for that kind of thing.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If someone tried to penetrate me without a condom he would be asked to leave...there would be no second chance to put one on and carry on, I'd be too mad! I have had a few that didn't seem overly happy about it and one or two that would soon go soft with one on, but they had two options...condom or go home! I always have a few to hand though in different brands and sizes in clear view and point them out before the fun starts so there would be no excuses for me.

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By *olfcartweaselCouple  over a year ago

Melrose

It's rape.

The statutes and case law are quite clear on this point. Conditional consent, infringed, is not consent.

Anyone who tried this with us would be treated as a rapist caught red handed should expect to be treated - poorly

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X "

Women do it as well. I.e ..try and guide it in without protection despite wanting protection etc...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

As an after thought - why anyone would want to fuck anyone off here without one is beyond me...

Unless, of course, you're part of a couple and it's your wife/partner.

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By *entleman_PerveMan  over a year ago

peterborough

Incredible i can't believe some guys

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I think it's very rude to try and do that sort thing!! You should respect a girls wishes. Yes it's feels better without one but why ruin a nice evening by trying to be sneaky!! Good for you by the way for putting your foot down.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I myself use condoms but if the girl wants it bareback yes.. no problem lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

i've had it many times where guys have had profiles going on about safe sex then tried to fuck me bare, infact it happens more often than not

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X "

Its about getting carried away in the moment! Its always good to play safe!!! X

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By *abcouple11Couple  over a year ago

Truro


"Strangley, my former FWB was on the round bed in Chams and I was kepping watch. EVERY guy who she let play with her respected my instructions to use a condom. Perhaps it because I was there?"

Sadly that might be largely true (partly true?)

We've seen places / events where with "no-one watching" everyone was decent and no-one tried to break the understanding that condoms were required. So maybe don't feel too disheartened.

The club rule

"This venue is entirely safe-sex with-condoms. Anyone wishing to bareback - arrange to meet elsewhere. Anyone trying to have sex bareback will be immediately ejected from the venue and permanently barred"

is exactly about this point???

No "he said she said we said they said". If you play in that venue you can count on the condom staying in place and anyone trying to break the rule is straight out never to get another chance.

We've started looking at venues with this rule because it has exactly this meaning.

Anyone reckon the same?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Strangley, my former FWB was on the round bed in Chams and I was kepping watch. EVERY guy who she let play with her respected my instructions to use a condom. Perhaps it because I was there?

Sadly that might be largely true (partly true?)

We've seen places / events where with "no-one watching" everyone was decent and no-one tried to break the understanding that condoms were required. So maybe don't feel too disheartened.

The club rule

"This venue is entirely safe-sex with-condoms. Anyone wishing to bareback - arrange to meet elsewhere. Anyone trying to have sex bareback will be immediately ejected from the venue and permanently barred"

is exactly about this point???

No "he said she said we said they said". If you play in that venue you can count on the condom staying in place and anyone trying to break the rule is straight out never to get another chance.

We've started looking at venues with this rule because it has exactly this meaning.

Anyone reckon the same?"

Yes I do

At The End Of The Day Its Just Common Sense But Haveing Read This Post Its Quite Worrying To See That There Are So Many That Do Such Crazy Things And Thou

They Know The Risk Is There Are Still Willing To Play Russian Roulette With

Anyone That Will Let Them With All The

Health Warnings And Everything Else, Their To Ignorant/Selfish To Realise That Safety Is More Important Than Sex

Itself...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Always play safe you never know. How it can turn out if the men arnt willing then its a no same with some ladys on here they want bare back if they do then sorry walk in past play safe and you can play for alit longer in life do t be a fool cover your tool

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By *SweetVioletx OP   Woman  over a year ago

Liverpool

Kt's interesting to hear all view points and positions.

I realise that both men and women can be guilty of this but can't get my head around given the nature of the site why anyone would take a risk and in turn place others at risk.

It has sadly made me re-evaluate future meets with single males aside from those I know already and will play safely.

I would love not to require condom use as I much prefer fucking without but not unless I am with a long term committed partner and we have both been fully tested x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Don't be a fool wrap your tool!!

And yes it does feel different with/without a condom. Better to be safe than sorry though!

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By *mmabluTV/TS  over a year ago

upton wirral

I find guys are ignorant about safe sex very wierd

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Would always use a condom, no point in risking your health just cause it might feel better. I actually like using condoms, last a damn sight longer with them than without them, my last meet came 5 times before my once, so she went home with a big grin on her face, happy days

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Why do some people always think carrying condoms is the guys responsibility? If you are going to have sex you should be prepared regardless if your male or female.

I have arranged two meets with couples to be told at the last minute we only play bareback. No mention of it on the profile or discussing the meet.

Some people like it bare and are sneaky about how they go about it.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why do some people always think carrying condoms is the guys responsibility? If you are going to have sex you should be prepared regardless if your male or female.

I have arranged two meets with couples to be told at the last minute we only play bareback. No mention of it on the profile or discussing the meet.

Some people like it bare and are sneaky about how they go about it."

I NEVER leave it to the guy however, he then must suffer my choice of brand, shape etc - so many guys get floppy when you show them a condom I think they must not be used to using them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Would always use a condom, no point in risking your health just cause it might feel better. I actually like using condoms, last a damn sight longer with them than without them, my last meet came 5 times before my once, so she went home with a big grin on her face, happy days "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why do some people always think carrying condoms is the guys responsibility? If you are going to have sex you should be prepared regardless if your male or female."

We're each responsible for our own sexual health...I'd never leave it to the guy to supply the condoms, although must admit I am a bit wary of those who turn up without unless they've checked with me beforehand that I have a supply as it can imply that their intentions were to go without.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always turn up with condoms unless its a last minute meet and even then if i cant get any (rarely an excuse since the amount of 24 hr shops is pretty large now days) I check before hand with the lady or couple in question, its silly to take risks but I can imagine it does put a dampener on things, cant see why people do it tbh try silly tricks like that spoils the fun for all

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Why do some people always think carrying condoms is the guys responsibility? If you are going to have sex you should be prepared regardless if your male or female.

We're each responsible for our own sexual health...I'd never leave it to the guy to supply the condoms, although must admit I am a bit wary of those who turn up without unless they've checked with me beforehand that I have a supply as it can imply that their intentions were to go without."

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By *igSuki81Man  over a year ago

Retirement Village

Whats a condom

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

A guy at a club once tried to penetrate me uncovered. Luckily I had someone watching out for me and the guy soon got told to jog on.

I had a couple of potential meets refuse to use condoms. I didn't meet them. Simple as.

If they don't want to be safe, they don't get any from me.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

hi violet, you are within your right to insist on a condom, in this day and age only a fool would have sex with out one, or some one who has no regard, for their health or the health of others," don't jump in muddy water with your wellies on ", lol

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Sadly it seems too common but there do seem to be lots of guys and a growing amount of women that dont seem to care which makes me ask the question is it worth it nowadays I love giving oral but if so many are taking risks I dont think its worth catching something

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By *uke olovingmanMan  over a year ago

Gravesend

COC ... condoms of course .. why take the risk

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By *risky_MareWoman  over a year ago

...Up on the Downs


"Hi x

Anyone else have this experience? X "

Yes, all the time, guys constantly try it on. If I have to insist, it ruins the meet for me, men need to take responsibility themselves. I also wonder how many of those guys get tested!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ya its fairly common thing when dogging also.. Maybe because it's darker than normal guys chance their arms buy always good to be aware

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X "

I don't understand this behaviour. I would never dream of taking a risk on my health like this.

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By *teveanddebsCouple  over a year ago

Norwich

You are letting them get away with it and reinforcing their 'get away with it if I can' attitude.

If people just stopped play and sent them on their way this wouldn't happen so much.

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By *SweetVioletx OP   Woman  over a year ago

Liverpool

I do stop - don't let anyone get away with it x unfortunately no way of flagging this as an issue x

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Sadly it seems too common but there do seem to be lots of guys and a growing amount of women that dont seem to care which makes me ask the question is it worth it nowadays I love giving oral but if so many are taking risks I dont think its worth catching something "

I agree, and it's a bit worrying that some have never visited a G.U.M. centre to have an annual check up (did I read on here that some didn't even know what one was?) Perhaps that's because they can't abstain from sexual contact for the 3 months before they can test for the real 'Biggy' no one wants to think about. That even more of a concern.

But it only my opinion.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X

Women do it as well. I.e ..try and guide it in without protection despite wanting protection etc..."

Agreed re above!! See my comment further up. And sorry but when women do it it's worse because they are all horny and sexy and trying to lull you in unprotected with the moment.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi x I'm not sure if this is a common issue but out of the singles males I have met (not necessarily those who I have verified) more than half have tried to slip their cock in minus protection. I am always clear on my position regarding safe sex. Yet it seems to be an accepted move to try to get away with not wearing a condom whilst my back is quite literally turned. The guys in question always seem astonished that it's a problem for me as I recoil from them from them and ask what the f@#k they think they're doing.

Most genuinely don't think it's a problem. The range of excuses is astounding.

Am I naive in thinking that if condom use is specified that guys will respect this or have I just been unlucky? Fortunately I am quite prepared to challenge them and quickly put a stop to all activities. But it does put a dampner on the meet, makes me feel like I'm constantly telling people off and makes me more cautious of meeting single males.

Anyone else have this experience? X

Women do it as well. I.e ..try and guide it in without protection despite wanting protection etc...

Agreed re above!! See my comment further up. And sorry but when women do it it's worse because they are all horny and sexy and trying to lull you in unprotected with the moment. "

I'm unsure of your logic there...it's worse when women do it? How is it worse, exactly?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yep been there had that..another good reason we dont meet single guys any more!!!! That should start another single guy rant...lol...xxx

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By *randMrs HitmanCouple  over a year ago

Oldham

We played last weekend two single guys played with us and both put condoms on but the male of a couple we played with tried to slip in without one on three occasions !!

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By *adcowWoman  over a year ago

kirkcaldy


"It's rape.

The statutes and case law are quite clear on this point. Conditional consent, infringed, is not consent.

Anyone who tried this with us would be treated as a rapist caught red handed should expect to be treated - poorly "

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By *heWolfMan  over a year ago

warwickshire


"A guy at a club once tried to penetrate me uncovered. Luckily I had someone watching out for me and the guy soon got told to jog on."

I've caught a certain chap in a club TWICE pulling out whilst taking someone from behind, and fast as lightning, as he put his cock back in, he whipped his condom off and held it in the palm of his hand. (In a way, I'm impressed at his dexterity!)

When he finished, he pulled out, crouched over and making it look like he'd pulled it off as he was withdrawing. I KNOW what I saw, and he does too - the club, however, refused on both occasions to do anything about it, it was my word against his.

He loves nice dark rooms, but I WILL catch him again, and I will probably get barred for what I will do to him, but he's a rapist, pure and simple - if consent for intercourse is conditional on him wearing a condom and he whips it off, the consent is no longer valid.

Of course, that would probably be dependent on the woman stating nice and clearly, so there are no misunderstandings, that a condom is necessary or no sex - so say it, ladies, don't assume all men share the same standards as you. It also gives bystanders, like I was, the green light to step in and say something.

Don't be afraid to kick up a fuss if you catch someone trying it on - until someone gets a proper talking to (or a trip to the cells), idiots will continue to try their luck - and get away with it, apparently.

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By *enny PR9TV/TS  over a year ago

Southport


"It's something I've noticed a number if times too so it's not that unusual.

Also the number of guys that turn up without condoms to a meet and use the "oh, well shall we just carry on without" the look of disappointment when I pull out my wide collection is a sight to behold and the "oh you have some"

You also rarely see guys carrying them in a club.

I think every one would admit sex is better without them but in the lifestyle we lead they are a necessary evil.

I had one guy tell me it was a week to his payday and he couldn't afford them....I suggested popping into the GUM and pick some up for free and I never heard from him again.

"

At Blackpool Connections Condoms and lube are supplied free by the health authority, another swingers club get them free from the same place but they charge £1 each for a condom, not only ripping off swingers but Tax payers as well.

Jenny.

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By *aughtyladyYummymanCouple  over a year ago

In a place not far from Exeter

I have exactly the same experience I would say at least 50% of the single men I have met have tried the same trick!! Funnily enough married men always come well prepared lol.

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By *hropshire irishMan  over a year ago

Shropshire

I wouldn't put it all on the single guys.

I can name at least 5 girls (2 single, 3 part of a couple) who've just tried slipping it in bare and another 5 who tried pressurising me into playing bare

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By *hropshire irishMan  over a year ago

Shropshire

When I went out with my last girlfriend, who I met on here, and was going through who I had met with via swinging it had only been 20-25. 5 out of that number trying to slip it in bare and another 5 trying to persuade me to play bare is quite a high percentage!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Tell them you have an inhospitable vaginal wall and they need to cover up. They will shit themselves and run a mile and you can laugh at them as you made it up. If they are prepared to go bb scare them stupid and you might wake them up to reality.

Or say something like " I wouldn't do that if you want it to still be there in a week"

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Always take my own...problem solved

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Always take my own...problem solved"

As every man should

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"bareback with a stranger sounds horny as hell, BUT STUPID ALWAYS WEAR PROTECTION!"

Stupid always wear protection????

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Tell them you have an inhospitable vaginal wall and they need to cover up. They will shit themselves and run a mile and you can laugh at them as you made it up. If they are prepared to go bb scare them stupid and you might wake them up to reality.

Or say something like " I wouldn't do that if you want it to still be there in a week" "

I've had them say to me 'but I'm clean' to which I usually ask if they're sure I am? I may have had clean results at the clinic but that's only a snap shot in time, and as careful as I am I could never give anyone a 100% guarantee... Too many assume condoms are safe, they aren't there just safer.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Clean results only count for the time up to the check was done. From my point of vie, I would be asking why your meets don't carry thier own condoms.

I always have my own with me on a meet. Maybe that has something to do with all the AIDs adverts on telly back in the 80's & 90's, it became second nature to have them.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always carry my own and even wear 1 in group play with the wife as its only fair

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always carry a couple in the wallet and always take some to meets, it's not just the woman's health on the line.

always talk before the fun begins and respect each others limits.

If playing with a regular fb you can have different rules, But I'd prefer to be safe.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Not just single men male from a couple tried it once."

This has happened to us too. I always keep my hand on the cock right up to the point of entry and check throughout if doing doggy. C also watches too.

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By *teveanddebsCouple  over a year ago

Norwich


"I do stop - don't let anyone get away with it x unfortunately no way of flagging this as an issue x "

But do you stop play completely or let them carry on after they have bagged up?

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By *itten-xxxWoman  over a year ago

North West

I've noticed this quite a bit lately too. Have people decided that the risk of HIV or STI's are so low these days that it's not worth using protection anymore?

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By *eglieanCouple  over a year ago

Torbay


"Another thing to watch out for in group play situations is a guy fucking one woman then withdrawing and trying to enter another without changing the condom. Some guys hear the message 'wear a condom' but forget it needs to be fresh one for every partner!"

See this a couple of times now,, once the guy in question even said he only had the one. So he comes to a party with only one condom? Told him to shove off,, but turns out hed been bonking at least 2 of the girls... party over..

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By *adyGardenWoman  over a year ago

LONDON (se)

I have never had this issue with a meet but in a club I have and I put my foot down.

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By *eglieanCouple  over a year ago

Torbay

If a fella turns up and it turns out he doesnt have a condom,, because he forgot them, or didnt realise he needed them but would go and get one,, play would halt. He obviously doesnt use them when he can get away with so not the sort of careful fella we would play with. Their face when you say it aint gonna happen....

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By *eakcoupleCouple  over a year ago

peak district

That's why G always stands by when R gets into the swing for a greedy girl session. Surprising the number of men who try it on bareback!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Always have condoms on me even if its just a social you never know what might happen, if I'm off to a club or a party the only problem i have is how many too take nothing worse then running out

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I always bring my own, I'd rather not risk my health for a shag. Plus BB is something I think is well special for people you really like and trust. It's good to keep it that way I think.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Ah don't you hate it you read an Op then their profile and find it quite interesting but only to see your just under their age range :p

Ah well

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By *hatFellaNZMan  over a year ago

London

I play safe when playing with a new partner. I get really turned on by bareback and have done it where Ive known the person and their history but Im reeeaallly turned off by being a dad right now!

Side note, I was at Erotica last year and heard a bunch of guys outside the STD testing station saying shit like "Ive never been tested before". WTF?

I get tested every 3-4 months and take a phone from everyone I get with. Its not hard.

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By *hatFellaNZMan  over a year ago

London

^^ Ah, that would be a phone number, not a phone. I'm not a thief!

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By *SweetVioletx OP   Woman  over a year ago

Liverpool


"Ah don't you hate it you read an Op then their profile and find it quite interesting but only to see your just under their age range :p

Ah well "

Sorry chick

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I've heard this from my mrs quite a few times and it always pisses me right off. I'm very respectful and take my own and I never question using a condom at all. Can't understand why some blokes have to try it on, glove up or no love you prats

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By *unPeteMan  over a year ago

Near Bristol

There are women out there too who try to fuck before the condom is on!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"^^ Ah, that would be a phone number, not a phone. I'm not a thief!"
liar liar, pants on fire

Her

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