FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Parties...should guest lists be published
Parties...should guest lists be published
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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I am trying to arrange my first proper party.
I have hit a snag / dilemma. ..
Every one is playing the waiting game. ..wanting to know who else is going before committing.
Is that options available in swingers clubs, saunas etc.
Why should I mould my guest list based on my tastes and friends on the whim of others.
is it right to give out other people's private pics ?
What does the audience think....am mega pissed off n now can't be arsed to organise this for the benefit of other swingers... |
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By *litterbabeWoman
over a year ago
hiding from cock pics. |
I really don't understand completely what you mean although there is no way that other people's private pics should ever be given out.
I am helping with a social/play event and the guest list is published... It's up to others if they wait or put their names down.
I don't understand enough about the situation to comment further. |
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personally i dont post the guest lists for the bbw nights at chams because it gets all political with people telling me not to add this person because of something or saying they arent going because so and so is going etc.
the only people i listen to about those who can and cannot come are the club |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Never right to give out pics of others without their express consent beforehand 
Guest lists are good in that, you can have a quick perv and possibly contact some people ahead of time, so you feel more relaxed as you feel you already kind of know some people.
The down side is, guest lists could put off others, if they dont like the look of the other party goers, dont like who's verified them etc and is the perfect stalkers tool.
Good luck to you, I wouldn't personally but go you for taking it on |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
If it was one of the big events/socials then Id quite like to know but it wouldnt be essential because Id be going just to socialise and mingle.
If it was a small house party then Id want to know because its not as easy to avoid people you might not want to see as it is at a big event.
If I found out someone had been sharing my pics without my permission Id chop their balls off. |
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By *anSusieCouple
over a year ago
Midlothian |
We generally like to see who is attending a party. our friends who organise a regular party always put a guest list up. As stated earlier, we can then contact some of the people, we may be of interest to or who interest us. sharing other peoples pics is a big no no though!! (Dan)
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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NEVER EVER GIVE OUT PPLS PRIVATE PICS THAT THEY HAVE SENT TO YOU THAT IS A BIG NO NO THATS WHY THEY ARE PRIVATE NOT PUBLIC PICS. If it is a party in your home, you dont have to publish a list but you should know if some guests have a prob with others etc. etc., just if ppl askwho is going in message tell them and they can make their ownmind up whether they wish to attend HAVE FUN ANYWAY |
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If its your party, your house, its your rules.
Personally, I wouldn't publish the list, if people are going to be awkward about it, just invite more to make up the numbers lol!
Friends who regularly hold parties never post the guest list,and they always invite at least twice the number that they want to turn up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Every one is playing the waiting game. ..wanting to know who else is going before committing.
Short sighted people as there cant be a party if no one will commit  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Every one is playing the waiting game. ..wanting to know who else is going before committing.
Short sighted people as there cant be a party if no one will commit "
But wouldn't you want to know if you were the only couple attending. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I took myself off a party asi cant be bothered with politics. if I saw the guest list I wouldnt have said yes!!
big socials or events publish the names sure but private photos fuck no |
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I e-mailed all the people on my invitations list to see what "public opinion" was. Consensus was against sending pics out, which I agree with.
Mixed opinions about appearing on guest lists though. Some don't mind, but others don't like the idea of third parties knowing what they are doing, where, and with whom. Different people, different thoughts.
The other thing is, how can a guest list ever be complete if you have people coming who are not on this site (they do exist believe it or not! lol) So at best you'd be giving out incomplete information.
Now for the killer...what happens when your guest list gets into the wrong hands? Someone whose toes you have trodden on...someone who you can't or won't invite, or just a plain old mischief maker, who uses your guest list to bad-mouth you to your potential guests??? It's happened to someone I know, and I certainly wouldn't want it happening to me.
You must be very trusting, or very prepared to take the risk if you make your list public (like I've seen on people's profiles)
I'm not saying it will definitely happen to you, but just be aware is my advice!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"never give out private pics, its invasion of privacy
publish the guest list with everyones usernames and leave them to make their minds up"
 with the exception of if people asking for their name not to be on the list then don't put it on. |
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"If it was one of the big events/socials then Id quite like to know but it wouldnt be essential because Id be going just to socialise and mingle.
If it was a small house party then Id want to know because its not as easy to avoid people you might not want to see as it is at a big event.
If I found out someone had been sharing my pics without my permission Id chop their balls off."
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm going to a party on my own in a few weeks, I'm glad the guest list has been published so I can message a few of the single guys beforehand and get a 'feel' for who's going. |
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I think private house parties are different to large socials at clubs etc as there is less places to avoid people you don't like lol
Having said that I.wouldn't host an open party at my house, I'd specifically invite people I wanted to be there.
Still a bit confused by the private pics comment though. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If I were invited to attend a small private party id like to be told beforehand who else was invited..just out of courtesy so that I could see if others on the guest list were people that id want to socialise / play with.
Having said that..id be happy for my username to be put on a 'guest list' to be privately maled to others being invited.
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"I am trying to arrange my first proper party.
I have hit a snag / dilemma. ..
Every one is playing the waiting game. ..wanting to know who else is going before committing.
Is that options available in swingers clubs, saunas etc.
Why should I mould my guest list based on my tastes and friends on the whim of others.
is it right to give out other people's private pics ?
What does the audience think....am mega pissed off n now can't be arsed to organise this for the benefit of other swingers..."
Definitely No private pics.
As for guest list, Up to the host. You can always say that some guests don't want their names on a published guest list and if they want to know who else is attending, then they will also have to attend to find out. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Never right to give out pics of others without their express consent beforehand
Guest lists are good in that, you can have a quick perv and possibly contact some people ahead of time, so you feel more relaxed as you feel you already kind of know some people.
The down side is, guest lists could put off others, if they dont like the look of the other party goers, dont like who's verified them etc and is the perfect stalkers tool.
Good luck to you, I wouldn't personally but go you for taking it on "
I have to agree. ...I did experience a few stalker like episodes after a party. Guys I wasnt interested in but who were wanting to play with me. As my name was on the guest list. ..they hounded me on the website for ages. Very annoying. I blocked them but it was still annoying knowing they were able to do that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Personally I'm all for a guest list. I would be more likely to go if I knew who was going (as in profiles) and was able to check them out and suss if there would even be a possibility of getting on with them. Had an invite recently to a party. There was no guest list and I didn't go because it wasn't worth the risk getting there to find 1. I didn't have a basic level of attraction to anybody 2. No one had turned up 3. None of my swinging enemies were there (I exaggerate but don't want to bump into a clinger at a party) risk v reward!
Maybe if you set it up from the start with a rolling guest list that gets updated and sent, you only end up with people who don't mind their names on a guest list + there is no waiting game that you have when a party is already set up then you try introduce a guest list. Probably start a forum thread like some of the bigger parties do eg FFFF social at xtasia...
I know it's more difficult in practice...but all the best  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I reckon it is going to be a play party, not just a social...
I would suggest that you concentrate on your "core" of couples/singles that you can trust and build the guest list from there. Everybody can bring a new friend and voila!
I don't think that announcement in Fab will make many people to make serious commitment.
Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I am trying to arrange my first proper party.
I have hit a snag / dilemma. ..
Every one is playing the waiting game. ..wanting to know who else is going before committing.
Is that options available in swingers clubs, saunas etc.
Why should I mould my guest list based on my tastes and friends on the whim of others.
is it right to give out other people's private pics ?
What does the audience think....am mega pissed off n now can't be arsed to organise this for the benefit of other swingers..."
I always post guest lists so people can message and get to know each before the event if they choose to |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"I am trying to arrange my first proper party.
I have hit a snag / dilemma. ..
Every one is playing the waiting game. ..wanting to know who else is going before committing.
Is that options available in swingers clubs, saunas etc.
Why should I mould my guest list based on my tastes and friends on the whim of others.
is it right to give out other people's private pics ?
What does the audience think....am mega pissed off n now can't be arsed to organise this for the benefit of other swingers..."
I'm confused. Having read your details you state you've held parties before.
If they worked - why change a good formula. You're also very clear on how you plan your parties and communicate to those interested.
So why the need for advice? Has something changed?
And I'm curious to know how you plan to 'guarantee' that those attending are attractive - since attraction is a very personal thing!
A |
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Ask the people who have been before to leave you with verifications. It will give people a flavour of who/what to expect even if you don't have a guest list to give out.
Knowing that a good percentage of people on a guest list won't turn up anyway, a past history of who's been may be more reliable than a guest list that could be as much fact as fiction...and yes I do know of times when names have been added to guest lists of people who had no intention of being there, just to make the prospects look good. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hmmm lots of advice...
i may have not made it clear in my original post...think i missed out a sentence.
i had no intention of giving out private pics or info...much has be sent to me before via whatsapp...so what i was trying to explain is that looking at peoples' profile won't give much away in terms of appearance.
the last group i had came together quite by chance within 24 hours...so i thought more time would yield more guests.
yes maybe have no limits on numbers...as people will drop off. So go above what i can comfortably squeeze in with room to play.
i had not factored in a couple of elements...in terms or size of house and space to avoid...
Men are so very different in outlook about intimacy than women...and i think that i need a woman's perspective and touch.
So back to the drawing board or build up my contacts via my own previous meets.
I may throw good social house parties...and have a talent for giving pleasure sexually and being open and relaxed about sex...but it's not just a case of mixing the two
If anyone wants to message me privately on the subject...please do
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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As you rightly put its about building up contacts. We have found word of mouth moves very fast in this world when it comes to parties. When we have wanted to attend parties we put up meet and changed our status and we soon had some kind people offering us some interesting choices.
Most of our Contacts we have got from the club world which I think have us a good grounding. |
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Best just to invite people while your at a club,let them know you will be holding a private party,let them know where and when,by all means put their site names up,but Never,,put their private pictures or send their pictures without permission first |
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