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disturbed......
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Am staying at a friend's tonight and ended up in bed with her pal.....nice you'd think right?
Errrr.....no.
Just had to come down to the living room because she literally wouldn't take no for an answer.
It didn't feel right and I told her this, she knows my safe word and it got entirely ignored, we had no protection and she was quite happy to carry on.
Fuck that.
It was literally my strength that got me out of the situation and nothing else....
To be honest, I feel a bit abused and if the shoe was on the other foot i'd be branded a rapist.
Any other guys been through this? because quite frankly I feel like muck right now. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You did the right thing No means No weather you are male or female she was in the wrong x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's not good
No does mean no
Male or female
Well done for getting out of the situation
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You did the right thing No means No weather you are male or female she was in the wrong x"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You did the right thing No means No weather you are male or female she was in the wrong x"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well done you it's good to know that you got out of the situation.
When the situation has calmed down a little you need to let her know that what she tried to get you to do was wrong and let her know how it's made you feel.
There is no excuse for that no matter what gender you are xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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What were you doing in bed with her in the first place?
Two sides to all stories..
How does she know your safe word? Have you had sex with her before? X |
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"What were you doing in bed with her in the first place?
Two sides to all stories..
How does she know your safe word? Have you had sex with her before? X "
There are two sides to every story however having previous knowledge of a person, being in bed with them, knowing their safe word .....none of these gives anyone permission to force them to have sex. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What were you doing in bed with her in the first place?
Two sides to all stories..
How does she know your safe word? Have you had sex with her before? X "
We were in bed because it was the only spare bed and we shared....in my nievety I always thought two people can do that without having sex....
And she knows my safe word because the friends who we were with also swing and she was interested in the subject so a lot of stuff came up in conversation and that was one of things that was discussed. The fact I said no should have sufficed to be fair.
Yes we ended up kissing etc but when someone says no, stop, enough it means no, stop, enough.
Does to me anyhow.
My underwear is ripped, I'm wearing torn underwear at work right now  ........if I tore a woman's nickers trying to remove them after she said no.........id be on a register.
If someone kisses me it does not give me carte Blanche to do as I want. Ever.
She has since apologised in tears so she knows she's wrong.
I dunno how to feel right now I really don't
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Reply privately (thread closed by moderator) | |
"What were you doing in bed with her in the first place?
Two sides to all stories..
How does she know your safe word? Have you had sex with her before? X
We were in bed because it was the only spare bed and we shared....in my nievety I always thought two people can do that without having sex....
And she knows my safe word because the friends who we were with also swing and she was interested in the subject so a lot of stuff came up in conversation and that was one of things that was discussed. The fact I said no should have sufficed to be fair.
Yes we ended up kissing etc but when someone says no, stop, enough it means no, stop, enough.
Does to me anyhow.
My underwear is ripped, I'm wearing torn underwear at work right now ........if I tore a woman's nickers trying to remove them after she said no.........id be on a register.
If someone kisses me it does not give me carte Blanche to do as I want. Ever.
She has since apologised in tears so she knows she's wrong.
I dunno how to feel right now I really don't
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Good on you for posting - we forget that violation is violation in all sorts of ways, any attempt to manipulate or deceive or coerce can leave a person feeling 'slimed' like that. It sounds like you sailed a bit too close to the wind this time!! |
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By *idsAndyMan
over a year ago
Worcestershire |
I agree... No means NO and good on you! |
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Everyone on here will say you did the right thing, some Will question the circumstances, but the bare facts are you definitely acted in a proper manner. I can only offer a long distance man hug for how you have been left feeling, I can only imagine. Give it time & you'll feel proud of yourself. Definitely speak to her when both have calmed down, speak openly but kindly which, I don't doubt you would. All the best mate. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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This definitely happened |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"This definitely happened"
Thanks for firming that up in my mind.....I wasn't too sure.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thats awful! You might consider telling her that what she did constitutes sexual assault and that you have every right to go to the police.
I have been in a similar position where I was in bed with a man and we were kissing but I just didnt want it to go further. In fairness, we had gone to bed with the intention of having sex but thoughts of my very recent relationship break up, suddenly flooded my mind and I couldn't go through with it. So I apologised and explained that I wanted to stop. He stopped immediately and was a gentleman. Now.. I did feel guilty actually because I realised I shouldn't have put myself in that situation when I was not ready and it wasnt very nice for the guy to be rejected like that. BUT the point is . .I said NO and that irrespective of the circumstances. ..he respected that. Because to do otherwise is sexual assault or worse case...rape! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Everyone on here will say you did the right thing, some Will question the circumstances, but the bare facts are you definitely acted in a proper manner. I can only offer a long distance man hug for how you have been left feeling, I can only imagine. Give it time & you'll feel proud of yourself. Definitely speak to her when both have calmed down, speak openly but kindly which, I don't doubt you would. All the best mate."
Dude, man hug received ........ Thankyou x |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
I think if I woman was posting this we'd probably be describing it as a sexual assault and advising her to go to the Police. I dont see any difference between that and this situation - its sexual assault.
OP, I hope youre ok and I also hope you follow it up through the proper channels. For that reason Im closing the thread now sorry. |
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