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first time at swingers club
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We're new to the scene and never had any meets yet. It has been suggested to us quite a lot to go to swingers clubs and socials other members have arranged outwith the clubs. We're heading down to Blackpool within the next few weeks and thought we would maybe try some things while we're there. Did anyone ever feel nervous or shy about big groups in the beginning as we feel it's maybe a bit too much for us just now and don't know how we would react to it. Looking to hear from club owners or the more experienced swinger. Thanks AP xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We're new to the scene and never had any meets yet. It has been suggested to us quite a lot to go to swingers clubs and socials other members have arranged outwith the clubs. We're heading down to Blackpool within the next few weeks and thought we would maybe try some things while we're there. Did anyone ever feel nervous or shy about big groups in the beginning as we feel it's maybe a bit too much for us just now and don't know how we would react to it. Looking to hear from club owners or the more experienced swinger. Thanks AP xx "
Avoid Blackpool clubs, try No.3 in Chorley which is a half an hour drive from Blackpool, best club for newbies in my opinion |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
i think the key thing to get across is that everyone is nervous at their first club or social...
we were all new once...,
I would give the same advice to everyone, be that couple, single gal or a single guy...
go with an open mind and no expectations... and just talk to people!
sometimes being new you sit in a corner and hide away, but in a sense you create a little bubble around yourself.... and that makes it harder to mingle.. and to be approachable |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Infusion in Blackpool is a great club. Really friendly staff and fabulous facilities. It is a wet club. Couples night is on a saturday. If you tell the staff that you are club newbies they will give you a tour and put you at ease. Nothing ventured, nothing gained!!  |
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By *NaughtyCouple
over a year ago
St Albans |
Stay relaxed - think everybody is likely to be nervous the first time they visit a club it's just because you don't know exactly what to expect. If there's a bar area prob best to be closer to it than further away from it at first as it's the one place you can guarantee most people will spend at least some time at.
Remember most people going there are likely to be open for at least a nice chat so don't be shy - worked for us our first time  |
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We were petrified! We only started swinging last April. We must have spent the first 3 months blending into the furniture in clubs. Lol!
We also felt that everyone was hardened swingers and that we may have been out of our depth. But no...there will be lots of people in the same boat as you or people that appreciate your boundaries etc.
Make a point of saying hello to people. Getting in to conversation made us feel at ease and in time we have now made some fantastic friends which has also been good for outside meets and parties. 
Fem x |
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If you're anything like me you'll be convinced that a swinger club is just one big naked orgy as soon as you walk in. Wasn't like that at all.
You'll be fine and apart from the odd bit of nudity you won't see/get involved in any action unless you want to x |
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Only been to infusions in Blackpool, but a great club. If you explain when you enter that you are newbies, I'm sure they will look after you.
Always remember you are in charge of yourselves. You can play if you wish or just enjoy the atmosphere with each other.
As has been said, we were all newbies once.
Go with no expectations and you won;t be dissapointed, Good Luck
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Forgot infusions was in Blackpool . brilliant club to go to if you fancy a different one to a reg one, massive pool, sauna jacuzzi but it isn't fully licensed but they do sell a non alcoholic beer x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Well we are going to a club for the first time this weekend also we are going with another couple we met for a drink a week ago and all got on well and are all a little nervous but also excited too , watch this space ?? |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"Well we are going to a club for the first time this weekend also we are going with another couple we met for a drink a week ago and all got on well and are all a little nervous but also excited too , watch this space ??"
actually be careful......
in a way going as a couple with a couple is almost the worst way to go to a club as a newbie because you do have this tendacy to create a "bubble" around you both.... its almost the least approachable situation as you block yourselfs off from everyone else..... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks just that we're not get even social meets cause sex is not on the table and wouldn't know how we would be we would probably sit in the corner because we wouldn't know how to approach people and where to start we would probably have a big sign on our head saying that we're new lol  |
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we are relatively new to the scene but really enjoying our new lifestyle
whats more we are making some really good kinky friends who are on our same wavelength
of to Xtasia on sat night so with any luck we will make more new friends
ps , if an ugly git like me can do it then anyone can ,,,, just need a bit of a personality and plenty of charm  |
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"I went to Infusions for my very 1st club visit and was made to feel really relaxed.
Some great advise already posted, can I just add not to drink too much alcohol.
Have fun and good luck x"
very good advise about alcohol , Mindy needs a glass of wine [large] but a second takes the edge of her sexuality |
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"If you're anything like me you'll be convinced that a swinger club is just one big naked orgy as soon as you walk in. Wasn't like that at all.
You'll be fine and apart from the odd bit of nudity you won't see/get involved in any action unless you want to x"
That's interesting to read. Been thinking about dipping our toes in for ages, but its that image which has been putting me off a little. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We've got our first club visit in 2 weeks to Xtasia, but we are going with a group of experienced club goers. So will be shown the ropes, but still nervous, and excited! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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That's what we we're looking for someone to show us the ropes and take it easy on us it would be a bit easier to go in with a group if it's your 1st time then your not going to feel left out because most people will know everyone if they're a regular |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nerves is completely natural, you are wandering into the unknown. We still get a little tingle of nerves when going to regular haunts, but with added excitement at the possibilies.
Clubs actually have more soft swingers than hard unless its a group that know eachother already, random stuff does happen but dont be surprised if nothing at all happens.
Just get used to the environment, play on your own and get used to having sex around others then take it from there.
Just being in the same space as other like minded folk will do wonders.
We would suggest you try both mixed and couples only nights to figure out what your preference is as the two have a very different vibe.
Remember you are never under any obligations no matter who you go with or who you meet there. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thanks capers seems so right what you say we dont even know what were after really thats being honest were going with a total open mind not soft or hard swing just going to go with how we are feeling on the night it is exciting and gets us interested in senarios of what could happen on the night but were also going on the understanding of what we dont want to happen too hopefully enter the hot tub though and take it from there x
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"Thanks just that we're not get even social meets cause sex is not on the table and wouldn't know how we would be we would probably sit in the corner because we wouldn't know how to approach people and where to start we would probably have a big sign on our head saying that we're new lol "
Keep your eyes peeled on the meet requests and parties forum, the UK forum and the Scotland forum for socials.
Some are a handful of people meeting for a drink, some take over a whole venue, others are at swingers clubs. They're a great way to meet people with no pressure to play. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We are actually going with another couple we have met once last week for a drink so were all nervous and also excited but hope at least to get into the hot tub and maybe few drinks will ease us all in watch this space |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I remember the first time we went to chameleons. We got a room for the night. We didn't come out for two hours because we were so nervous. By the end of the night I was up to all sorts and walking around topless.
X |
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"I remember the first time we went to chameleons. We got a room for the night. We didn't come out for two hours because we were so nervous. By the end of the night I was up to all sorts and walking around topless.
X"
ll, we were like that at the VA, stayed in the room for a while but once we ventured out, was amazing, very nice people and a good laugh.
Did not play on the first night but have done since xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I remember the first time we went to chameleons. We got a room for the night. We didn't come out for two hours because we were so nervous. By the end of the night I was up to all sorts and walking around topless.
X ll, we were like that at the VA, stayed in the room for a while but once we ventured out, was amazing, very nice people and a good laugh.
Did not play on the first night but have done since xx"
We have not played yet due to not having a clue what the I want to play signals are. I am way to nervous to approach anyone and nobody comes up to me. When I go to regular clubs I get chatted up all the time so I don't know what I am doing wrong. I think I am a lost course lol.
X |
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"I remember the first time we went to chameleons. We got a room for the night. We didn't come out for two hours because we were so nervous. By the end of the night I was up to all sorts and walking around topless.
X ll, we were like that at the VA, stayed in the room for a while but once we veintured out, was amazing, very nice people and a good laugh.
Did not play on the first night but have done since xx
We have not played yet due to not having a clue what the I want to play signals are. I am way to nervous to approach anyone and nobody comes up to me. When I go to regular clubs I get chatted up all the time so I don't know what I am doing wrong. I think I am a lost course lol.
X"
You're definitely not a lost cause... you are attending clubs. That's the first step.
We blended with the furniture for a few months before we started chatting to people as we were too shy.
We just smile at the people we like the look of and when they start smiling back and looking at us then we approach them and say hello. Even if you just have a drink and chat, it can lead to playing..xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Went to my first club last night. It was the fab social at Xstasia. I was really nervous but needn't have been. Great bunch of people. Great club.
I didn't go expecting to play. Just wanted to have a good night out and meet people. In the end I ended up playing several times. But I think if I had gone with the expectation of playing on my first visit, I would have been giving off the wrong vibe.
Now I've popped my club cherry, I will be more relaxed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Will took me to my first club last week, and I loved it. He took me on a tour, and I think he was expecting me to run!
I couldn't wait to play!
I loved that we went on an afternoon, and saw some people I already new, which relaxed me. I went with the attitude that if I played great, if not great - guess what?! lol
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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We will be needing to do that or we would probably just sit there talking to each other that's one of the things we've worried about going and not talking to anyone cause we wouldn't know where to start and shy lol |
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I had my club debut too last night at Partners!
Something that has been on the list for a long time, harder as a single female to find the right person to go with.
The whole evening was fun filled with lots of chatting and laughing with people which made me soon feel very relaxed and at ease.
Knew on my first visit I probably wouldn't play but was open to the possibility I might.
I think as long as your comfortable with who your going with then you'll relax. Try most things twice. Get the shock factor out the way with the first visit then go dip ya toe in again..
Enjoy x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Only been to infusions in Blackpool, but a great club. If you explain when you enter that you are newbies, I'm sure they will look after you.
Always remember you are in charge of yourselves. You can play if you wish or just enjoy the atmosphere with each other.
As has been said, we were all newbies once.
Go with no expectations and you won;t be dissapointed, Good Luck
"
|
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The clubs we've been to are nothing like the huge orgy we imagined as soon as we walked in. In fact it is exactly like a normal bar/club....other than the porn on tv!!
We sat for a while and chatted between ourselves and then a couple of couples came over and chatted. At no point did we feel under pressure....even when a couple asked if we were playing we were able to just say, another time without any issue.
The playrooms tend to be away from the main bar area and again we walked about freely without anybody jumping on us... 
We stuck to ourselves in the playroom the first time and even built up the courage to share a bed and again there was no pressure.
You will have a great time....I would suggest going on a couples night the first time at least.
Go and have a great time...what's the worst that can happen... |
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"The clubs we've been to are nothing like the huge orgy we imagined as soon as we walked in. In fact it is exactly like a normal bar/club....other than the porn on tv!!
We sat for a while and chatted between ourselves and then a couple of couples came over and chatted. At no point did we feel under pressure....even when a couple asked if we were playing we were able to just say, another time without any issue.
The playrooms tend to be away from the main bar area and again we walked about freely without anybody jumping on us...
We stuck to ourselves in the playroom the first time and even built up the courage to share a bed and again there was no pressure.
You will have a great time....I would suggest going on a couples night the first time at least.
Go and have a great time...what's the worst that can happen... "
Summing up courage to go to Chams at some point with my horny partner. Most likely a couples night and hopefully we will break the ice there and have a good time whether playing or not (although hopefully we will).
Bit of advice please. My partner is somewhat body concious. Any tips on what to say so she doesn't end up comparing herself to the other ladies? |
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"Infusion in Blackpool is a great club. Really friendly staff and fabulous facilities. It is a wet club. Couples night is on a saturday. If you tell the staff that you are club newbies they will give you a tour and put you at ease. Nothing ventured, nothing gained!! "
Absolutely - Infusion is 100% recommended... |
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