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i need help and fast
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i have been messaging couples and ladies since i came on this website with dignity and respect, i know people have preferences and i respect that, but i put a lot of time and effort into my messages after reading their profile and i get an instant deletion or no reply at all. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG? i just dont know what my flaw is, its like everyone has already met me or do i have a black mark or something on my profile that i cant see. i am no timewaster and i do turn up to meets if i can, if i cant i message before time. i would like some friendship and fun, but i cant seem to get anywhere with people. PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i have been messaging couples and ladies since i came on this website with dignity and respect, i know people have preferences and i respect that, but i put a lot of time and effort into my messages after reading their profile and i get an instant deletion or no reply at all. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG? i just dont know what my flaw is, its like everyone has already met me or do i have a black mark or something on my profile that i cant see. i am no timewaster and i do turn up to meets if i can, if i cant i message before time. i would like some friendship and fun, but i cant seem to get anywhere with people. PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!"
Maybe you aren't what person looking for, try socials and clubs to meet people |
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"Tooooo many single guys..people can afford to be choosy"
it feels like im being dropped for bad qualities that i dont even know about. i cant get verified and i cant get any meets, i have no way to get to any socials either |
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"agreed there, puts us good guys in a bad light"
No, no, no it doesn't. If I receive a nice message, one that has taken the time to read my profile, send a message that shows he has, has a good selection of pics, I don't think 'fuck it, he's the same as all the others'.
It's very easy to blame your lack of success on others. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tooooo many single guys..people can afford to be choosy
it feels like im being dropped for bad qualities that i dont even know about. i cant get verified and i cant get any meets, i have no way to get to any socials either"
You only get back out of it what you put in. Go to socials and clubs and meet people face to face.
IMO when I see these types of posts from single guys having a moan, they make me cringe. Your baking yourself look desperate buddy. Just go with the flow and take it as it comes.  |
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Your profile is negative and too passive. Your pants photos don't add anything. You might benefit from rewriting and losing the negative woe is me, ESP the bit about being out of a relationship and being rusty. Be more positive and get verified by cam. You could go to a club or social if you made the effort. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP - if someone isn't attracted to you - all the great messages in the world and an amazing profile won't make the slightest difference!!!
You can't know why others aren't replying - just that they're not. Deal with it and move on rather than stress about it and constantly try and analyse the 'whys'. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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There are lots of single guys on this site so competion is high, so to speak...
Another thing is..... You get out of this site what you put in. If your not prepared to help yourself then don't expect others to help you.
You say you can't get to socials! Why can't you?
We held a social earlier this year and had a member come all the way from Scotland!!! On public transport  so it can be done |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There are lots of single guys on this site so competion is high, so to speak...
Another thing is..... You get out of this site what you put in. If your not prepared to help yourself then don't expect others to help you.
You say you can't get to socials! Why can't you?
We held a social earlier this year and had a member come all the way from Scotland!!! On public transport so it can be done "
Or take a few months off and reappraise yourself - then come back in a clearer and more realistic frame if mind |
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By *odareyouMan
over a year ago
not far from iceland,,,,,, tescos is nearer though :-) (near leeds) |
I don t want to throw cold water on you mister, however I do think that those people that can t construct a profile without asking for help are on a loser to start with,  No one can provide you with a magic pill, the generic advice you ll be given bepositive, tell them what you can offer etc you ll still need to construct it yourself,, I d Hope people can do an engaging profile without someone holding their hand,
if you re basing your whole fun on what the site can offer you I think you may be disappointed as are many guys on here just because of sheer numbers,,  ,
This enhances my social life, its not the be all andend all, 
Have fun fella, its why we re all here,,
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I'm thinking it's your bobbly boxers!!!
Op ask yourself what makes you stand out from the other guys on here who thrive?
The getting verified quandary is a Catch 22 situation I must agree. Keep and eye out for a local social and try your best to get to it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You've posted numerous times in the past asking for advice. Why not take that advice on board? It's easy to blame other men for making it tough for you, but the reality is that you have to make your own luck on here.
Keep trying, but if it is really getting you down then maybe you should call it quits. You seem to take things very personally. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"i have been messaging couples and ladies since i came on this website with dignity and respect, i know people have preferences and i respect that, but i put a lot of time and effort into my messages after reading their profile and i get an instant deletion or no reply at all. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG? i just dont know what my flaw is, its like everyone has already met me or do i have a black mark or something on my profile that i cant see. i am no timewaster and i do turn up to meets if i can, if i cant i message before time. i would like some friendship and fun, but i cant seem to get anywhere with people. PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!"
If thy delete they could well have looked and not found you attractive move on. Even Brad Pitt would get turned down here more than he got asked around. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry for the bluntness but.....
You look bloody weird in your profile pic, people can dance around the edges but no one should be here for dating, so the old old bad face great personality doesnt apply. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Your username would be enough to put me off
"
Yes, the username puts me off too.
I also don't want to be holding the hand of a man who advertises himself as rusty. It sounds a bit self pitying -- I run from that...and fast!
;) |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"agreed there, puts us good guys in a bad light
No, no, no it doesn't. If I receive a nice message, one that has taken the time to read my profile, send a message that shows he has, has a good selection of pics, I don't think 'fuck it, he's the same as all the others'.
It's very easy to blame your lack of success on others."
Saved my fingers some typing  |
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I just don't know why you're so negative about yourself. Read the thread you put up 7 weeks ago. Who told you that? Why would you think that? Be more positive and I'm starting to think it's pointless you putting up help threads as you're not taking much notice of advice given. The word 'rusty' springs to mind. Not a very sexually attractive word, is it? The words 'keen' and 'enthusiastic' are and could be incorporated into a sentence with a similar meaning but saying it in a good way.
Still, what do I know, eh?  |
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"Your username would be enough to put me off
Yes, the username puts me off too.
I also don't want to be holding the hand of a man who advertises himself as rusty. It sounds a bit self pitying -- I run from that...and fast!
;)"
so how do i change my name then as i havent a bloody clue at all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sorry mate you have posted a few of these threads and it seems youwant things to fall into your lap. If it has not happened by now it's unlikely.
Public transport runs in Lowestoft get to a club or social hopefully the effort will pay off. |
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By *ENDAROOSCouple
over a year ago
South West London / Surrey |
"Your username would be enough to put me off
Yes, the username puts me off too.
I also don't want to be holding the hand of a man who advertises himself as rusty. It sounds a bit self pitying -- I run from that...and fast!
;)
so how do i change my name then as i havent a bloody clue at all"
Menu - left hand side
Near to the bottom - change username
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Public transport runs in Lowestoft get to a club or social hopefully the effort will pay off."
Exactly the X1 goes direct to pboro which is fairly close to a club I think x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"agreed there, puts us good guys in a bad light
No, no, no it doesn't. If I receive a nice message, one that has taken the time to read my profile, send a message that shows he has, has a good selection of pics, I don't think 'fuck it, he's the same as all the others'.
It's very easy to blame your lack of success on others."
|
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"
Public transport runs in Lowestoft get to a club or social hopefully the effort will pay off.
Exactly the X1 goes direct to pboro which is fairly close to a club I think x"
steady on peterboro, i havent got the money to go there as im unemployed which makes it a bit difficult to get around for me and the change username as i have just found out you have to upgrade to change your name and i do wish to stay free on this site |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Tooooo many single guys..people can afford to be choosy
it feels like im being dropped for bad qualities that i dont even know about. i cant get verified and i cant get any meets, i have no way to get to any socials either"
Look at social posts, see if anyone from your area going to car share, go by train, mega bus, there's always way of determined to go |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Public transport runs in Lowestoft get to a club or social hopefully the effort will pay off.
Exactly the X1 goes direct to pboro which is fairly close to a club I think x
steady on peterboro, i havent got the money to go there as im unemployed which makes it a bit difficult to get around for me and the change username as i have just found out you have to upgrade to change your name and i do wish to stay free on this site"
Then sadly I think all the advice in the world is pointless.
You have a reason 'why not' for everything! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Public transport runs in Lowestoft get to a club or social hopefully the effort will pay off.
Exactly the X1 goes direct to pboro which is fairly close to a club I think x
steady on peterboro, i havent got the money to go there as im unemployed which makes it a bit difficult to get around for me and the change username as i have just found out you have to upgrade to change your name and i do wish to stay free on this site
Then sadly I think all the advice in the world is pointless.
You have a reason 'why not' for everything! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Public transport runs in Lowestoft get to a club or social hopefully the effort will pay off.
Exactly the X1 goes direct to pboro which is fairly close to a club I think x
steady on peterboro, i havent got the money to go there as im unemployed which makes it a bit difficult to get around for me and the change username as i have just found out you have to upgrade to change your name and i do wish to stay free on this site"
Save few quid each week then, others manage it! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"agreed there, puts us good guys in a bad light
No, no, no it doesn't. If I receive a nice message, one that has taken the time to read my profile, send a message that shows he has, has a good selection of pics, I don't think 'fuck it, he's the same as all the others'.
It's very easy to blame your lack of success on others."
Well said |
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i understand what your all saying, i have to apologize to you all, your trying to help me and i have bad answers for everything. the past year and a half have been bad for me and have made me very impatient and very self conscious and annoyed with the entire world in general. i feel like i have no purpose and i just dont know what to do anymore. i need to let my hair down and have some fun but im finding that difficult aswell. i just wish someone would let me have some fun thats all |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
Sorry, but sometimes, certain sites are just NOT for some people!
I mean, would I want to meet you? Sorry to be harsh but not a chance in hell!
This site is for fun, not to constantly massage someone's ego...and if you cannot willingly accept peoples advise, then stop asking for it and just knuckle down and plug away without moaning.
If it is still not working for you, as I say in real life, sometimes you just have to 'suck it up!'  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To change your username, free, just delete your account and open a new one,
you have a great body, your torso pic is good, add a cock pic, and hey you would be away.  |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"To change your username, free, just delete your account and open a new one,
you have a great body, your torso pic is good, add a cock pic, and hey you would be away. "
Excellent advice. Start over, with a more positive profile, better pics (your face pic is a bit scary - smile more!), and a better attitude. As someone posted above, how are you expecting to attend meets if you can't afford to travel? Females and couples are extremely unlikely to just come round to your place without a social meet first.
I've had a difficult year so far too, jobwise, personal life wise, and even meet wise. Yet not one of my meets know this, because sexy fun times are supposed to be....FUN! |
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"I've had a difficult year so far too, jobwise, personal life wise, and even meet wise. Yet not one of my meets know this, because sexy fun times are supposed to be....FUN!"
Same as us - we had a terrible year with operations etc.. but you got to be positive and get on with life..
im sorry - but This guy just seems Negative to us..  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Like attracts like, we all have highs and lows,
What you give out you get back.
Some days you wake up, and just know it will be a bad day, stub your toe on the hoover, bills come, money runs out, rejection letter.
By the end of the day, you just know you should have stayed in bed. Not the best day to be thinking about making someone feel special . not the best day to be on a sex site !
Some days you wake up and feel great, everything seems to be going right, even the sun comes out, you whistle or sing to yourself, and things start to go right, a much better day to make an effort and expect good things to happen, and they will.
We all have a mixture of good and bad.
To put the odds in your favour of having more good days than bad days is to visualise sunshine and things that make you happy.( just type visualisation in google, spend some time turning your negative energy ( which you are giving out ) into positive energy. And you will start getting positive responses.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"if i did make a new profile what would you suggest a new nickname would be, it has to involve "maddog" in some form though. i would like people to help me change though"
Try mirror writing. And READ people's advice, for pete sake.
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By *itSamCouple
over a year ago
Birmingham |
"if i did make a new profile what would you suggest a new nickname would be, it has to involve "maddog" in some form though. i would like people to help me change though"
The name put people off so why create a new name with the same idea.
Our name took hours and hours to think up. Our names . . . Mitch and Sammy. M m m m m
Ooh _itsam lol. Didn't we do well.
We send messages and if people reply then great. If people do not that is fine too. Just keep going and be positive. One day you will meet some nice people.
Can not comment on the profile as I have not read it, just going by what is on here. People are on here for a good laugh so if you are woe is me then people are going to run. We are fussy with who we message as we like to message people we have something in common with. We have met some really nice people on here and some we call good friends. As people can see in the forums we are organising a karaoke take over at x tasia. Great way to make some friends. Sing n swing. The dance floor area for a bit of a social and fun and then many places to go off to. Do not be disheartened if you do not get replies. Clear your mind, read your profile if you did not know you, what sort of person do you think you are. Always make sure you are honest tho.
Our profile is getting shorter as each time I read it I think.... Jeez getting bored as it goes on. You can see from this message I can type for Britain.
So for those if you who read our profile and think. This goes on...... Glass half full. It was longer who hoo.
If you ask advice then it is not really "your" profile so you may get bad meets.
Clubs are good, we love them. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You got to stay positive. Negativity will only put people off. You don't need to look like Brad Pitt to get laid. Look at Ron Jeremy!! Just be relaxed and fun and everything else will fall into place. Just keep trying, but don't pester. I block couples who don't reply. Then I get on with my life.
Don't blame people for not being attracted to you. It's up to you to make yourself attractive to them! A bit of gym work and some good pics will help. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"if i did make a new profile what would you suggest a new nickname would be, it has to involve "maddog" in some form though. i would like people to help me change though"
I'd suggest 'veryveryveryhornymaddogwithabone' |
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"You got to stay positive. Negativity will only put people off. You don't need to look like Brad Pitt to get laid. Look at Ron Jeremy!! Just be relaxed and fun and everything else will fall into place. Just keep trying, but don't pester. I block couples who don't reply. Then I get on with my life.
Don't blame people for not being attracted to you. It's up to you to make yourself attractive to them! A bit of gym work and some good pics will help. "
im not blaming others, i dont need gym work as i dont see the point of them when i walk and cycle everywhere. im not great at picture taking, i would like a hand with that, but ill try and get some better ones. i never pester couples. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Hi,
I say this in the kindest possible sense but it will be blunt.
Your statuses make us run a mile! Boring is as boring does, begging is unattractive. Keep your status interesting and positive and we might have decided to have a look at your profile and then possibly jump in the car and meet for coffee. But hon please don't feel like I'm beating you up, with the above advice ie keep it positive and be selective about which pics you use you'll soon start to see some results.
Mrs Pt xx |
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just goes to show i dont actually know what the hell im doing really, as i dint think i was begging in my statuses, it was just the way i was feeling at the time. your not beating me up at all Mrs Pt, i am just a late learner as i have always been |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just try believeing in yourself a little. Look at the statuses of people who seem to get a lot of meets.and try to emulate the vibe in your own status.
There is no problem with being a late learner, just as long as you do learn!
We only get out of this what we put in but sometimes you gotta be prepared to wait a while
Xx |
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By *am123Man
over a year ago
essex chelmsford |
"i have been messaging couples and ladies since i came on this website with dignity and respect, i know people have preferences and i respect that, but i put a lot of time and effort into my messages after reading their profile and i get an instant deletion or no reply at all. WHAT AM I DOING WRONG? i just dont know what my flaw is, its like everyone has already met me or do i have a black mark or something on my profile that i cant see. i am no timewaster and i do turn up to meets if i can, if i cant i message before time. i would like some friendship and fun, but i cant seem to get anywhere with people. PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!"
i would normally advise cutting the messages down to just fancy a fuck which works well but looking at your post and profile you are doing bad enough on your own just keep at it, it cant get any worse luck has gotta change soon |
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