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Polyamory After Swinging?
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So I know the main difference between swinging and polyamory is fucking vs love. I'm a married chick and I've fallen in love with a married chick I met on this site. Our hubbies are in the know. I'm not trying to invite criticism. All of us here are going against the grain anyway. But I am curious if anyone else here has had this experience, and how it's going or how it went. I'm madly in love with her and my hubby. We're over a hundred miles apart, but talk and text everyday and have had awesome sex alone and with our husbands involved with full swaps. Fucking awesome, by the way. I'm soliciting responses that are insightful and respectful. Thanks. -C |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We all have the capacity to love more than one person at any one time. Having many children proves that to us. Likewise we love differently.
We cannot necessarily control our emotions because they are the response to the chemical reactions in our brains (hormones secreted). What does matter occurs on a societal level (people will judge) and a personal level between you, the girl and your husbands: where are you planning to take this love? |
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By *dwalu2Couple
over a year ago
Bristol |
Are you able to download BBC podcasts in the US? If so, Radio 4 Documentary of the Week had a recent feature on Monogamy, and there was an interview with a poly amorous mfmf family who lived together, might be interesting for you. |
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Would say communication as with many aspects of this part of our lives is paramount..
probably guessing you have discussed this thoroughly with each others partners, pitfalls and bad times as well as the good..
and if that works for you all then respect, good luck and enjoy..
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I was seeing a guy and his quest for dating turned into a quest for polyamorous relationships. IE he wanted to fall in love with more than one person AND wanted to act on that. As much as he ticked many boxes I saw it as a personal recipe for disaster. IMO he would need someone of the same mindset.
If insecurity/jealousy doesn't raise its head within the four, then enjoy the ride  . |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I know the main difference between swinging and polyamory is fucking vs love. I'm a married chick and I've fallen in love with a married chick I met on this site. Our hubbies are in the know. I'm not trying to invite criticism. All of us here are going against the grain anyway. But I am curious if anyone else here has had this experience, and how it's going or how it went. I'm madly in love with her and my hubby. We're over a hundred miles apart, but talk and text everyday and have had awesome sex alone and with our husbands involved with full swaps. Fucking awesome, by the way. I'm soliciting responses that are insightful and respectful. Thanks. -C"
I'm not a expert but there was a programme on tv not long ago about polyamory sorry I can't remember the day or the channel but you may be able to find it on I player |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I know the main difference between swinging and polyamory is fucking vs love. I'm a married chick and I've fallen in love with a married chick I met on this site. Our hubbies are in the know. I'm not trying to invite criticism. All of us here are going against the grain anyway. But I am curious if anyone else here has had this experience, and how it's going or how it went. I'm madly in love with her and my hubby. We're over a hundred miles apart, but talk and text everyday and have had awesome sex alone and with our husbands involved with full swaps. Fucking awesome, by the way. I'm soliciting responses that are insighuhtful and respectful. Thanks. -CI'm not a expert but there was a programme on tv not long ago about polyamory sorry I can't remember the day or the channel but you may be able to find it on I player"
It's cbeebies on during the day. Archies great. |
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An interesting article here
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-23726120
and a quick google of polyamory and UK produced a hit to polyamory UK website so I assume an american equivelant would be as easy to find |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"So I know the main difference between swinging and polyamory is fucking vs love. I'm a married chick and I've fallen in love with a married chick I met on this site. Our hubbies are in the know. I'm not trying to invite criticism. All of us here are going against the grain anyway. But I am curious if anyone else here has had this experience, and how it's going or how it went. I'm madly in love with her and my hubby. We're over a hundred miles apart, but talk and text everyday and have had awesome sex alone and with our husbands involved with full swaps. Fucking awesome, by the way. I'm soliciting responses that are insighuhtful and respectful. Thanks. -CI'm not a expert but there was a programme on tv not long ago about polyamory sorry I can't remember the day or the channel but you may be able to find it on I player
It's cbeebies on during the day. Archies great."
this was on in the late evening! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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mrs has fallen in love with her best friend, who is exactly the same as her, both in looks and outlook on life, however, the fact its her best friend is stopping her taking it further.
not any help but thought i would add to the conversation lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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My husband and I once fell in love with a very good female friend of mine and it went great for a while, everyone was happy, family, kids and friends accepted the fact we were all quite different, but it didn't last, eventually things started to get complicated and we had to end it, even though it caused a great deal of hurt for all involved....fond memories though x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've never believed that you're only meant to love one person in a lifetime.... Most people will have broken that idea by the time they reach 30 anyway.
The interesting thing is that if jealousy doesn't rear it's ugly head, then why not enjoy it for what it is? I mean, you're not keeping it secret as both hubby's know...
The only problem is societal criticism.. Polyamory is still very different, but if that doesn't bother you, or you plan to keep it very quiet then why the hell not? |
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I would say that there are no right or wrongs here as everyone and every dynamic is different. For us, we want a woman who is more than just a swinger. We want exclusive and a trusting relationship, but not to the extent of living together. That might suit a particular woman, but not all.
Perhaps this isnt a true Poly relationship, but its more than swinging and it would suit our dynamic |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We were heavy into swinging when one day we had a party and she never left.she and her daughter moved in and we three all were in a loving committed(we still played always together but it was rare) relationship for almost 5 yrs.then she had to move away for work. Unfortunately we couldn't follow because of work house ect..we are still friends and her daughter still stays with us for the summer.it must happen naturally like a relationship,there will be jealousy,but that's part of any relationship dynamic.if you feel that you guys are strong enough in your love and are open and honest.then welcome to the world of poly.swinging is fun, but remember they are two diffrent things  |
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"So I know the main difference between swinging and polyamory is fucking vs love. I'm a married chick and I've fallen in love with a married chick I met on this site. Our hubbies are in the know. I'm not trying to invite criticism. All of us here are going against the grain anyway. But I am curious if anyone else here has had this experience, and how it's going or how it went. I'm madly in love with her and my hubby. We're over a hundred miles apart, but talk and text everyday and have had awesome sex alone and with our husbands involved with full swaps. Fucking awesome, by the way. I'm soliciting responses that are insightful and respectful. Thanks. -C"
We're currently living in a polyamory relationship. It's extremely hard work as the other don't live close by. So all communication is done via text/email/instant messaging. It has it's ups and downs but the highs are worth all the trouble of the lows. We do meet up when we can as a four as well as our other couples and spend seperate weekends together. All we'll say is keep working at it and keep talking to everyone and be 100% honest even at the worst times and it'll keep it going. All the best M&H xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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mail me if you would like a book on the subject of relationship changes and multiple partners. it is not a large book but covers some aspects of your relationship and may be of interest. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plenty online pm me if you want a link
I'm sure people are flocking to message you after your previous comment."
Might help if you did your research, there are plenty of articles that state that if you bothered to look. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plenty online pm me if you want a link
I'm sure people are flocking to message you after your previous comment.
Might help if you did your research, there are plenty of articles that state that if you bothered to look. "
I've no interest in polyamoury, but as I've got nothing against people who find it works for them then I try to have a little more tact than basically saying they are ugly.
Besides, why would I need to go elsewhere to do my research when there are such charming examples of the shallow end of the genepool popping up on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I only found out what polyamory was because I've been watching 'big love' with bill Paxton in it. It's a new series on sky about a guy with 3 wives and the complications/benefits it brings
It's not bad, check it out |
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By *_MariusMan
over a year ago
Currently Faraway |
"So I know the main difference between swinging and polyamory is fucking vs love. I'm a married chick and I've fallen in love with a married chick I met on this site. Our hubbies are in the know. I'm not trying to invite criticism. All of us here are going against the grain anyway. But I am curious if anyone else here has had this experience, and how it's going or how it went. I'm madly in love with her and my hubby. We're over a hundred miles apart, but talk and text everyday and have had awesome sex alone and with our husbands involved with full swaps. Fucking awesome, by the way. I'm soliciting responses that are insightful and respectful. Thanks. -C"
While I am nobody to criticise anybody, I don't think I could ever do that. I once had a regular f*ck buddy and while I had nice fun of the flesh, he soon started developing feelings for me that I could not reciprocate, as I couldn't ever love anyone except my partner, so I had to stop it. He got really hurt and I got hurt as well because I wasn't intending to make him suffer but it happened. All I can say is, whatever makes you happy xx |
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"I only found out what polyamory was because I've been watching 'big love' with bill Paxton in it. It's a new series on sky about a guy with 3 wives and the complications/benefits it brings
It's not bad, check it out "
It's actually an older series as matter of fact they stopped making new episodes. Great show though not exactly what we have going on. |
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There are a lot of poly relationships out there some are very successful. But they do by nature have more complications than monogamous, open or swinging relationships.
There are a couple of sites run by polys for polys and poly curious that deal with the issues and I would advise a google search.
Or you can send me an email addy and Ill send you some links. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plenty online pm me if you want a link
I'm sure people are flocking to message you after your previous comment.
Might help if you did your research, there are plenty of articles that state that if you bothered to look.
I've no interest in polyamoury, but as I've got nothing against people who find it works for them then I try to have a little more tact than basically saying they are ugly.
Besides, why would I need to go elsewhere to do my research when there are such charming examples of the shallow end of the genepool popping up on here."
you appear to be wallowing in the shallow end here, there are many articles on polyamory v swinging out there and they are not difficult to find. There are some aspects of a poly lifestyle which are compatible with swinging and many swingers out there that for all their supposed tolerance of others and their alternative lifestyles. One of these and many articles have been written from both viewpoints (swinging and poly) go under the heading polys are too ugly to swing.
I have read the articles, much as I have read and researched on many subjects ranging from anthropology to xenophobia.
You can stick to your shallow gene pool, your bitter remarks and your closed views on a subject you know nothing and have no interest in |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Plenty online pm me if you want a link
I'm sure people are flocking to message you after your previous comment.
Might help if you did your research, there are plenty of articles that state that if you bothered to look.
I've no interest in polyamoury, but as I've got nothing against people who find it works for them then I try to have a little more tact than basically saying they are ugly.
Besides, why would I need to go elsewhere to do my research when there are such charming examples of the shallow end of the genepool popping up on here.you appear to be wallowing in the shallow end here, there are many articles on polyamory v swinging out there and they are not difficult to find. There are some aspects of a poly lifestyle which are compatible with swinging and many swingers out there that for all their supposed tolerance of others and their alternative lifestyles. One of these and many articles have been written from both viewpoints (swinging and poly) go under the heading polys are too ugly to swing.
I have read the articles, much as I have read and researched on many subjects ranging from anthropology to xenophobia.
You can stick to your shallow gene pool, your bitter remarks and your closed views on a subject you know nothing and have no interest in"
I'm impressed, I really am. You almost sound like you know what you are talking about. It's a pity your proofreading skills failed with whatever you were trying to say with the "one of these and many articles..." Comment that makes no sense whatsoever.
In honour of your butchering of english I did a google search on "polyamoury too ugly to swing" and got precisely zero results on the first 3 pages that tied into your ugly argument.
I'm more than happy to keep my bitter remarks about you. I'll love them and hug them and squeeze them.
I'd love to know what my closed views on polyamoury are? Saying it doesn't interest me but that I don't hold anything against people who are into it sounds a lot less closed than someone saying that polyamourists are ugly. |
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