FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > convincing wife to swing?
convincing wife to swing?
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"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there.    "
I wouldn't slate you, its why I asked if she was interested at all. |
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if she is 50/50 then you need to talk to her a lot, answer all the questions she has and don't push her. If ultimately her answer is no, accept it gracefully and find other ways to fulfill your fantasies. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how to convince the mrs to swing?  "
erm you have a couples profile but you want to know how to convince wife to swing. dont you think the profile is a little presumptuous if she doesn't swing |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there.
I wouldn't slate you, its why I asked if she was interested at all."
oh and they have been verified as a couple but she needs convincing to swing
ok how's that work???????????
fake verification ? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how to convince the mrs to swing? "
I don't think you can convince her, but let her look at profiles, forums etc, a lot of people think of the swinging couple on the program Benidorm lol, as did I, i thought it was all couples, didnt realise it was lots of different combinations, if she takes a look she may change her own mind.
Best of luck, and don't listen to the negative feedback in the forum, some just like to sit on moral pedestals, without offering anything constructive to the mix.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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could be a cam verifaction..as its hidden and tick same as meeting!
this is why i would love to see 2 different colour ticks on here, so if veris are hidden...least can tell from colour of tick if person met or cam verified  |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
I have a feeling the "verified couple profile" is the male half having a couple profile with a female fuck buddy (ie, not the wife) but now wants to swing with the legitimate wife?
If this is the case, only problem is does he (male half) setup a new profile to get new verifications that are valid for them both, or assume the existing verifications can apply to him and the new female half (ie the wife)?
Reason I ask, if he retains the original verifications, and (for some reason) the wife starts swinging, then he leaves the scene and she stays, and she gets a new fella (but prior to that they had not met anyone, socially or sexually) then you have this new fella, and the actual wife of the original guy inheriting verifications that neither of them were party to,.. yet all giving glowing references about how great a couple they were.
That would be weird.. and untrue |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"could be a cam verifaction..as its hidden and tick same as meeting!
this is why i would love to see 2 different colour ticks on here, so if veris are hidden...least can tell from colour of tick if person met or cam verified "
I suggested this idea probably 2 years ago.. sadly admin did not comment nor take it up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"could be a cam verifaction..as its hidden and tick same as meeting!
this is why i would love to see 2 different colour ticks on here, so if veris are hidden...least can tell from colour of tick if person met or cam verified
I suggested this idea probably 2 years ago.. sadly admin did not comment nor take it up."
i suggested it also but nothing! |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"could be a cam verifaction..as its hidden and tick same as meeting!
this is why i would love to see 2 different colour ticks on here, so if veris are hidden...least can tell from colour of tick if person met or cam verified
I suggested this idea probably 2 years ago.. sadly admin did not comment nor take it up.
i suggested it also but nothing! "
Maybe it needs more suggesting:
Come on Admin, if you can colour code the email messages in people's inboxes then surely colour coding the 3 verification types should be a breeze, and is the next logical step forward - you know it makes sense
the way I see it, its up to each person if they want to hide their (meet) verifications.. but I would also appreciate those that, while hiding their verifications, leaves me the option of knowing if they are webcam only, phone only or meet verifications. |
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"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there.
I wouldn't slate you, its why I asked if she was interested at all.
oh and they have been verified as a couple but she needs convincing to swing
ok how's that work???????????
fake verification ?"
Something isn't adding up. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Best of luck, and don't listen to the negative feedback in the forum, some just like to sit on moral pedestals, without offering anything constructive to the mix.
"
The guy is asking how to get his wife to swing, he's posting from a couples account which is verified - I think people querying that is constructive don't you. We all want the site to run smoothly with genuine people and not fake profiles.
Maybe all is ok, it is a couple swinging but I think the above questions should be clarified.
And about convincing anyone to swing - no. You do not own someone elses body, if they want to partake of this hobby then it has to be a personal decision and not because some guy thinks he'll get more opportunity of sex with others if he's in a partnership |
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"
Best of luck, and don't listen to the negative feedback in the forum, some just like to sit on moral pedestals, without offering anything constructive to the mix.
The guy is asking how to get his wife to swing, he's posting from a couples account which is verified - I think people querying that is constructive don't you. We all want the site to run smoothly with genuine people and not fake profiles.
Maybe all is ok, it is a couple swinging but I think the above questions should be clarified.
And about convincing anyone to swing - no. You do not own someone elses body, if they want to partake of this hobby then it has to be a personal decision and not because some guy thinks he'll get more opportunity of sex with others if he's in a partnership "
Indeed!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Putting aside the couples profile for a sec. Try introducing the idea of swapping as a fantasy into foreplay and during sex. Whisper ideas into her ear when shes really turned on and see if it provokes a positive or negative response. She may not be into it at all, in which case drop it, or she may just lack confidence, in which case work on it. Think baby steps. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's a difficult one... With my ex we used to fantasise about trips to the supermarket in sexy revealing clothes she owned and teasing the male employees... And her taking one if them into a store room as I paid for the shopping... But in the cold light of day she would never ever entertain the idea of 'sharing' with anyone else... It just remained a fantasy that made for great sex between us |
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The couples profile veri might have been for a social meet. I can't see any social meet not having something like 'how are you finding site works for you?' sort of question popping up though, so if the lady on the profile is the OPs wife, does she know? And all that stuff above about if one person leaves the newcomer 'inherits' the veri. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Ok sorry to be critical but ....
A. Veri is not shown
B. Been on here 11 months and only just posting that your trying to convince your wife to swing ?
C. Not responding to any of the posts ??
Suspicion levels are very high but us Brits are a cynical lot anyway lol  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm seeing a single male profile so maybe admin changed it."
didn't think admin could change it.
oh and how the fook did it get verified by meet so fast, as a couples profile it was verified surely this doesn't carry over? |
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i dont think you can convince anyone to swing.... either they will or they wont .... broach the subject carefully and at your peril.. .you could talk about threesomes in fantasy and judge the reaction... take it from there |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Yes admin can change profiles. I've reported quite a few profiles and admin have changed a single to a couple and couple to single. Choosing wrong gender is an option when you click on the report button on profiles. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes admin can change profiles. I've reported quite a few profiles and admin have changed a single to a couple and couple to single. Choosing wrong gender is an option when you click on the report button on profiles."
Oh can they...... didn't think that was possible as often see it in forums were people ask to change there accounts and believe they are always told no.
live and learn |
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By *habsMan
over a year ago
Fortress of Solitude, Middlesex |
"Yes admin can change profiles. I've reported quite a few profiles and admin have changed a single to a couple and couple to single. Choosing wrong gender is an option when you click on the report button on profiles.
Oh can they...... didn't think that was possible as often see it in forums were people ask to change there accounts and believe they are always told no.
live and learn"
Yup - the profile has been changed between last night and today from couple to single. Here's the only thing, do the verifications (hidden or otherwise) while the profile was "couple" still count try as (loose paraphrasing) "these two make a lovely and genuine couple - do not pass them by"? (again, loose paraphrasing). |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes admin can change profiles. I've reported quite a few profiles and admin have changed a single to a couple and couple to single. Choosing wrong gender is an option when you click on the report button on profiles.
Oh can they...... didn't think that was possible as often see it in forums were people ask to change there accounts and believe they are always told no.
live and learn"
I think where people want to change from say a single profile to a couples one because they've teamed up with somebody then they're advised to make a new profile because the veris only relate to one half. Where someone has set up a misleading profile eg single lady who never meets without her boyfriend present then admin will change that to a couples profile. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes admin can change profiles. I've reported quite a few profiles and admin have changed a single to a couple and couple to single. Choosing wrong gender is an option when you click on the report button on profiles."
Same here. One thing that really gets me annoyed is when single people - and both male and female do it - keep a couples profile going after they've split or the other half no longer wants to swing.
And we all know why it's done - to get around message filters.
So any I come across get reported - and specially those who use it to message us.
A 'dander-up' ted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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The thing is, should this guys wife say "oh yes hun let's give it a try" what the heck is she gonna say when she sees his profile!!!
11 months on here and a verification with another woman posing as her. 
Hmmm personally I (Mrs) would not be impressed. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how to convince the mrs to swing? "
You can't, nor should you try!
It's something that Must be a mutal agreement .. Recipe for tears and disaster if her heart isn't in it |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how to convince the mrs to swing?
You can't, nor should you try!
It's something that Must be a mutal agreement .. Recipe for tears and disaster if her heart isn't in it "
I agree with this. You shouldnt think of it as convincing her. Think of it as exploring with her. Go with her at her pace. If she has expressed even the slightest interest then be patient and let her lead the way. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"could be a cam verifaction..as its hidden and tick same as meeting!
this is why i would love to see 2 different colour ticks on here, so if veris are hidden...least can tell from colour of tick if person met or cam verified
I suggested this idea probably 2 years ago.. sadly admin did not comment nor take it up."
We have a different profile (very naughty one) and verified in person/cam/ etc there... but even with all the ticks in the boxes sometimes doesn't help either.
But as you said verification can be with fb or "?" but the problem remains.. you can "force" anyone to swing. It's a desire if it isn't there then forget it... no asking, begging, wishing or even forceful pushing will help... If there is no interest..fingers off better  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"how to convince the mrs to swing? "
Only way is to talk to her find out if she wants to, hell she may already be doing it and asking how to get you involved... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just to play devils advocate for a sec. I have known a couple where the wife was very reluctant to swing, and when coerced a little by the hubby discovered that she loved it (not us BTW). Probably the exception rather than the rule, but it happens. I would imagine more often this would result in a negative result for the partnership than a positive one so not a risk worth taking. Relationships should be the priority not the swinging. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes admin can change profiles. I've reported quite a few profiles and admin have changed a single to a couple and couple to single. Choosing wrong gender is an option when you click on the report button on profiles.
Oh can they...... didn't think that was possible as often see it in forums were people ask to change there accounts and believe they are always told no.
live and learn
I think where people want to change from say a single profile to a couples one because they've teamed up with somebody then they're advised to make a new profile because the veris only relate to one half. Where someone has set up a misleading profile eg single lady who never meets without her boyfriend present then admin will change that to a couples profile."
I've reported single women who only meet with o/h
It depends on how popular they are on the fab list if the mods do anything or not. |
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By *ezebelWoman
over a year ago
North of The Wall - youll need your vest |
"
I've reported single women who only meet with o/h
It depends on how popular they are on the fab list if the mods do anything or not."
It has nothing to do with the mods - Admin are the only people that can make those decisions.
If youve reported it to Admin they will have looked at it and where there is any evidence they will have taken action.
Now I must go and review my 'fab list' |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there. "
you hit the nail on the head....if she needs to be convinced ... its not for her. How would i convince the poster to gat a prince albert piercing .. |
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By *easing_twoCouple
over a year ago
Bristol, Thornbury |
"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there.
you hit the nail on the head....if she needs to be convinced ... its not for her. How would i convince the poster to gat a prince albert piercing .."
J has a PA it feels wonderful for both xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there.
you hit the nail on the head....if she needs to be convinced ... its not for her. How would i convince the poster to gat a prince albert piercing ..
J has a PA it feels wonderful for both xx"
My partner has two piercings too... i was just saying that if you need to be convinced about something then its probably not for you in the first place xxx |
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"
Best of luck, and don't listen to the negative feedback in the forum, some just like to sit on moral pedestals, without offering anything constructive to the mix.
The guy is asking how to get his wife to swing, he's posting from a couples account which is verified - I think people querying that is constructive don't you. We all want the site to run smoothly with genuine people and not fake profiles.
Maybe all is ok, it is a couple swinging but I think the above questions should be clarified.
And about convincing anyone to swing - no. You do not own someone elses body, if they want to partake of this hobby then it has to be a personal decision and not because some guy thinks he'll get more opportunity of sex with others if he's in a partnership "
Totally agree! If you need to "convince" your wife surely that's trying to get her to do something she's not interested in doing, and that's "forcing" her to do something. That's wrong! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have come across a few recently where the male half of an alleged couple asks similar thing. How can they be verified as couple if the mrs is not aware.
Just baffles me. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have come across a few recently where the male half of an alleged couple asks similar thing. How can they be verified as couple if the mrs is not aware.
Just baffles me."
Am I in a parallel universe? OP on this thread is a single guy who mentions his mrs on his profile, but us not on a couples profile. |
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"It's a difficult one... With my ex we used to fantasise about trips to the supermarket in sexy revealing clothes she owned and teasing the male employees... And her taking one if them into a store room as I paid for the shopping... But in the cold light of day she would never ever entertain the idea of 'sharing' with anyone else... It just remained a fantasy that made for great sex between us "
Lol, we have tried this, and a few months ago an employee in Morrisons started winking at Sugar and saying hello, it's not got far as he's only there now and again but it looks like he's keen so may get her to push it a bit and see as he was her favourite guy in there lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there. "
+1 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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If she doesn't know swinging at all. What ash did was talk about it during sex. Making me fantasised about being with other guys. And I loved it! Never look back.
If she isn't keen then id let her make the decision and not push her into anything she isn't comfortable with x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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That's pretty much how we got started with swinging we used to share fantasies with each other in the bedroom and texting during the day until we finally decided to take the plunge ..... You can't persuade someone to do it if they don't want to it will only end in a bad way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Who cares about his profile verification. His question was how to convince his wife to swing!
I tried over several years, once she cammed a couple of times and thought it was OK but when it came to meeting a couple for a drink they thought it was about fucking her straight away. They were time wasters and put her right of the idea altogether, hence me advertising as a male. I have fantasies that are nothing to do with love, I have a wife for that! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Who cares about his profile verification. His question was how to convince his wife to swing!
I tried over several years, once she cammed a couple of times and thought it was OK but when it came to meeting a couple for a drink they thought it was about fucking her straight away. They were time wasters and put her right of the idea altogether, hence me advertising as a male. I have fantasies that are nothing to do with love, I have a wife for that! "
Why were they timewasters? Perhaps they thought the same of you? |
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"I'm sorry and will probably get slated on here for this but if your wife needs to be convinced, swinging is probably not for her as a person or you both as a couple for that matter.
You could always try telling her your swinging solo and judge the response from there. "
Agree if not ready or wishing to indulge then not worth it lol x
Good luck x  |
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