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advice please
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By *livia_KWoman
over a year ago
South London |
Erm, don't you think you should have had this conversation with her BEFORE you joined here and met people? I think the question you should be asking yourself is how you are going to explain that to her. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im hoping to get my wife interested in swinging as i would like her to join me on here. What is the best way to bring the subject up.
Thanks"
Going back to the OP and without judging your situation, before we even got into swinging, we often used to discuss it as part of our fantasies during sex and the fascination just grew from there. However, I was appalled at the thought of joining a site like this, but was convinced by my husband to just have a look at the profile he had created for us....now I've kind of taken it ownership of it! If your relationship is strong enough, you should be able to at least talk about the idea without any pressure to actually do anything. Good luck
S x |
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To be honest, if you are struggling to talk about it. You are going to struggle even more to actually do it!
Open and honest communication is the only way. If either of you can't do that then forget it, it'll be a disaster. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your situation of whether your wife knows your here or not is irrelevant. What is relevant is your question of how to bring up the subject.
Firstly are you going to tell her that your here or not.
If yes we recommend a flak jacket and a helmet, prepare for fireworks.
If you don't tell her. Slowly introduce the idea, mention it during sex and see how she reacts. If she likes the idea, game on the seed is planted. You Will just have to take it from there.
Just don't storm in with it. It can be a very touchy subject. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Difficult to give an answer as we do not know you or your wife and the type of people you are and relationship you have. so I'll do what politicians do and answer a question with a question.
Does she know about your bisexuality.
If yes and accepts it then a joint move into swinging might not be a difficult sell.
If no then you have a situation. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im hoping to get my wife interested in swinging as i would like her to join me on here. What is the best way to bring the subject up.
Thanks"
I would suggest you talk to her (during foreplay, maybe) about HER fantasies, and hope that her fantasies include something that swinging can help her with (e.g. girl/girl fun, being watched, MMF, etc). Then drop the subject for a couple of weeks. If she doesn't mention it, bring it up again in a couple of weeks e.g. by saying 'I was really turned on by what you said about ...' Her reaction should let you know whether you're pushing on an open door, or whether it's something that she'll never do.
Either way, once you've had the first discussion, you need to delete your profile, or at least amend it to be so anonymous that she couldn't recognise you from it (take down picture, change location your nearest big town).
Once you've planted the thought in her head, she might decide to research it herself. If she finds you have already had meets on here will be a crippling blow to your marriage.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To build on what others have said...Patience is key on your part. If you haven't even opened the conversation yet you are far away from actually doing anything as a couple. JC and i talked about it for a couple of years before our first experience and there was a time that neither one of us would ever dream that we would allow the other to have sex with another person. But the talking started out small and then we would talk out scenarios during sex which surprisingly started to turn us on. After all that talk it actually turned into a big fantasy of mine to watch JC please another woman and i was on the quest to make it a reality. by the time it happened it wasnt too weird at all since we had already played it out in our heads what our boudaries would be. Now thats not to say that once we got in, it was smooth sailing. We have learned alot about ourselves and what we like and dont like. I do believe we actually communicate better with every aspect of our relationship now than we did before.
Also if she does develope an interest in swinging you need to be prepared for what she may want to experience. We have seen and heard stories of men who thought thats what they wanted but once they started swinging did not like that the wife was actually enjoying herself. You have to be very secure with yourself and your relationship. I hope this helps. |
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I recently suggested to my wife that maybe we could visit a swing club together, just to have a look?
She said absolutely not, then went to bed and cried herself to sleep.
She didn't speak to me at all the next day until the kids had gone to bed, at which point she told me she had no interest in watching other people have sex, or have others watch us, or play with other people. I will just have to try harder with her, and she will have to try harder with me she said.
I came to this site like many other men I guess, because of a lack of sex at home? Well, our sexlife hasn't improved, but at least I broached the subject, and we are at least, still together lol! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Erm, don't you think you should have had this conversation with her BEFORE you joined here and met people? I think the question you should be asking yourself is how you are going to explain that to her."
class lol x  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im hoping to get my wife interested in swinging as i would like her to join me on here. What is the best way to bring the subject up.
Thanks"
try showing her your profile and see what she says  |
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By *ohjaneCouple
over a year ago
south staffs |
"I recently suggested to my wife that maybe we could visit a swing club together, just to have a look?
She said absolutely not, then went to bed and cried herself to sleep.
She didn't speak to me at all the next day until the kids had gone to bed, at which point she told me she had no interest in watching other people have sex, or have others watch us, or play with other people. I will just have to try harder with her, and she will have to try harder with me she said.
I came to this site like many other men I guess, because of a lack of sex at home? Well, our sexlife hasn't improved, but at least I broached the subject, and we are at least, still together lol!"
Hmm, there is always at least two reasons why the sex in a marriage is not good, not satisfying, not exciting, not there. Those two reasons are you and your wife !!
Talk. explain. Teach, if necessary, but work on it. Don't just run off to the other play ground after a token attempt at improving the situation ( or none at all).
Just my two pennies worth.
Jane x
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im hoping to get my wife interested in swinging as i would like her to join me on here. What is the best way to bring the subject up.
Thanks
Going back to the OP and without judging your situation, before we even got into swinging, we often used to discuss it as part of our fantasies during sex and the fascination just grew from there. However, I was appalled at the thought of joining a site like this, but was convinced by my husband to just have a look at the profile he had created for us....now I've kind of taken it ownership of it! If your relationship is strong enough, you should be able to at least talk about the idea without any pressure to actually do anything. Good luck
S x"
That pretty much sums our experience up. I am sure it first got suggested when we were watching 'Screw My Wife Please' porn lol |
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"I recently suggested to my wife that maybe we could visit a swing club together, just to have a look?
She said absolutely not, then went to bed and cried herself to sleep.
She didn't speak to me at all the next day until the kids had gone to bed, at which point she told me she had no interest in watching other people have sex, or have others watch us, or play with other people. I will just have to try harder with her, and she will have to try harder with me she said.
I came to this site like many other men I guess, because of a lack of sex at home? Well, our sexlife hasn't improved, but at least I broached the subject, and we are at least, still together lol!
Hmm, there is always at least two reasons why the sex in a marriage is not good, not satisfying, not exciting, not there. Those two reasons are you and your wife !!
Talk. explain. Teach, if necessary, but work on it. Don't just run off to the other play ground after a token attempt at improving the situation ( or none at all).
Just my two pennies worth.
Jane x
"
well I would reply privately, but I'm outside your preferred age range! |
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"Im hoping to get my wife interested in swinging as i would like her to join me on here. What is the best way to bring the subject up.
Thanks
Going back to the OP and without judging your situation, before we even got into swinging, we often used to discuss it as part of our fantasies during sex and the fascination just grew from there. However, I was appalled at the thought of joining a site like this, but was convinced by my husband to just have a look at the profile he had created for us....now I've kind of taken it ownership of it! If your relationship is strong enough, you should be able to at least talk about the idea without any pressure to actually do anything. Good luck
S x
That pretty much sums our experience up. I am sure it first got suggested when we were watching 'Screw My Wife Please' porn lol"
lol and ours... Recurring theme  However it took months of seed planting and suggestion before the subject was broached. We had our first MfM threesome Saturday gone and now we're hooked. Maybe you should come clean as honesty and trust are paramount in this game! Ps have a stab vest on when you do!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Im hoping to get my wife interested in swinging as i would like her to join me on here. What is the best way to bring the subject up.
Thanks
Going back to the OP and without judging your situation, before we even got into swinging, we often used to discuss it as part of our fantasies during sex and the fascination just grew from there. However, I was appalled at the thought of joining a site like this, but was convinced by my husband to just have a look at the profile he had created for us....now I've kind of taken it ownership of it! If your relationship is strong enough, you should be able to at least talk about the idea without any pressure to actually do anything. Good luck
S x
That pretty much sums our experience up. I am sure it first got suggested when we were watching 'Screw My Wife Please' porn lol lol and ours... Recurring theme However it took months of seed planting and suggestion before the subject was broached. We had our first MfM threesome Saturday gone and now we're hooked. Maybe you should come clean as honesty and trust are paramount in this game! Ps have a stab vest on when you do! "
For those that don't know 'Screw My Wife' has couples going along to have the wife fucked by soome young stud porn star in front of the husband. It can be very erotic! |
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how would you suggest i could her interested in swinging or cuckolding
