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Friend with benefits wants more - what to do

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

Hi, hope you wise people of the forum can help with my dilema. I have a friend with benefits who is dropping big hints that she wants a relationship. I made it very clear from the start what the situation would be. I enjoy the sex with her, but i am not looking for a relationship and I know it sounds bad, she is not someone i would want a relationship with (not that she is a bad person or anything, but just not for me). I am thinking of ending it before i hurt her feelings. Any advice or anyone gone through something similar, would be greatly received. Many thanks

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Be really honest and stop shagging her lol women are delicate and she will blame herself no doubt

In our experience unless you are both swingers with experience u can't have friends with benefits without someone's feelings getting hurt

Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Be really honest and stop shagging her lol women are delicate and she will blame herself no doubt

In our experience unless you are both swingers with experience u can't have friends with benefits without someone's feelings getting hurt

Good luck "

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By *istress-MazikeenWoman  over a year ago

bolton


"Be really honest and stop shagging her lol women are delicate and she will blame herself no doubt

In our experience unless you are both swingers with experience u can't have friends with benefits without someone's feelings getting hurt

Good luck "

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Be honest and end it, soon.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

you sound like you have already made your mind up

she's not for you and your not after the same as her, the answers a no brainer really

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

If the answer you seek is not here adk the expert aka jeremy kyle

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By *ancs MinxWoman  over a year ago

Burnley

Having been in the same situation, its best you dont see her again, and just be honest and explain why!!

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By *livia_KWoman  over a year ago

South London

I think you have already answered your own question. If you don't want to be with her long term, don't be cruel and waste her time by letting her think you do.

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By *thwalescplCouple  over a year ago

brecon

Run.... and hide your rabbit!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"I think you have already answered your own question. If you don't want to be with her long term, don't be cruel and waste her time by letting her think you do. "

+1

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By *oiluvfunMan  over a year ago

Penrith


"Run.... and hide your rabbit! "

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago

thank you for your wise words, confirmed what i was thinking any way. Now to let her know

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"Be honest and end it, soon."

Disagree: end it now!

Sadly, if she's dropping hints and he continues to fuck her he's sending mixed messages.

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"I think you have already answered your own question. If you don't want to be with her long term, don't be cruel and waste her time by letting her think you do. "

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By *hoe_nixCouple  over a year ago

leeds

tell her the truth and move on

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

I'm quite sad for her really. I appreciate that you don't want to have a relationship at the moment, but how can you have regular sex with someone who would be 'not for you' in terms of a relationship?

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Hi, hope you wise people of the forum can help with my dilema. I have a friend with benefits who is dropping big hints that she wants a relationship. I made it very clear from the start what the situation would be. I enjoy the sex with her, but i am not looking for a relationship and I know it sounds bad, she is not someone i would want a relationship with (not that she is a bad person or anything, but just not for me). I am thinking of ending it before i hurt her feelings. Any advice or anyone gone through something similar, would be greatly received. Many thanks "

As the scope of your situation was agreed mutually as "no strings attached sex", I'd suggest that you tell the lady that, for you, it is still the same. And that you are not interested in anything different. If she does want something different now, then you mutually agree not to meet again. Good luck

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Yes end it now before you get yourself into an even bigger hole

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Yes end it now before you get yourself into an even bigger hole"

Thanks for your posts, i have ended it today.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Yes end it now before you get yourself into an even bigger hole

Thanks for your posts, i have ended it today. "

How did it go?

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By *iss_tressWoman  over a year ago

London


"I'm quite sad for her really. I appreciate that you don't want to have a relationship at the moment, but how can you have regular sex with someone who would be 'not for you' in terms of a relationship?

"

Nature of the beast some women tend to overlook as they too just want a shag.

You only need to read the forums to see what some men think but they still get meets. It took someone telling me he didn't meet people of here in his house for me to change my selection criteria.

If I'm not good enough to be seen going into your house you're not good enough to come into mine!

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"I'm quite sad for her really. I appreciate that you don't want to have a relationship at the moment, but how can you have regular sex with someone who would be 'not for you' in terms of a relationship?

"

It is sad and i dont feel great about it, but i did'nt want to hurt her feelings. But having sex with her and her still having the idea there could be more with me, is'nt right.

In terms of a relationship, there are lots of other things other than sex and attraction such as a persons aims in life, values, interests, personality etc.

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By (user no longer on site) OP     over a year ago


"Yes end it now before you get yourself into an even bigger hole

Thanks for your posts, i have ended it today.

How did it go? "

As well as can be expected. it was'nt a happy situation, but it is right in the long run.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Yes end it now before you get yourself into an even bigger hole

Thanks for your posts, i have ended it today.

How did it go?

As well as can be expected. it was'nt a happy situation, but it is right in the long run. "

Good luck ! All will be well soon

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Just hope she is not a bunny boiler!

Good luck!

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Be honest and end it, soon.

Disagree: end it now!

Sadly, if she's dropping hints and he continues to fuck her he's sending mixed messages. "

Don't try reading between the lines, I wasn't suggesting he carries on as they are for a while.

Suggesting he end it and soon, soon as he can, soon as he has the words.

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By *B9 QueenWoman  over a year ago

Over the rainbow, under the bridge


"Hi, hope you wise people of the forum can help with my dilema. I have a friend with benefits who is dropping big hints that she wants a relationship. I made it very clear from the start what the situation would be. I enjoy the sex with her, but i am not looking for a relationship and I know it sounds bad, she is not someone i would want a relationship with (not that she is a bad person or anything, but just not for me). I am thinking of ending it before i hurt her feelings. Any advice or anyone gone through something similar, would be greatly received. Many thanks "

In the words of the song; "Keep on running"!

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By *lackshadow7Man  over a year ago

Toronto


"I'm quite sad for her really. I appreciate that you don't want to have a relationship at the moment, but how can you have regular sex with someone who would be 'not for you' in terms of a relationship?

"

Quite easy. It is sex without emotional attachment. Physical attraction and emotional attachment aren't the same thing.

We all have the capacity for casual sex. Some are just more in tune with that than others.

The act of pleasurable sex, with a gratifying end does not have to equate to wanting to have a relationship with the person you are sleeping with.

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Having been in this situation some years ago, I can understand the lines for her have been blurred and what started out as just sex means more now. My "friend" was just honest with me...hurt like hell at the time but looking back rather that then spending more time having sex and trying to let me down gently

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Lock your rabbit up...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago


"Yes end it now before you get yourself into an even bigger hole

Thanks for your posts, i have ended it today. "

can I have her profile name , mmm I might get her on the rebound ,

only joking xx

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By *ezebelWoman  over a year ago

North of The Wall - youll need your vest


"Be really honest and stop shagging her lol women are delicate "

Awww Im feeling all girlie now. Ive been called some things in my time - but 'delicate' aint one of them...

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By (user no longer on site)  over a year ago

Think you have to stop as everyone else has said. It happened to me about two years ago, she wanted more than I did and it was very difficult to get her to let it go, caused me some difficulties at the club where we met as well for a while.

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