FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Message "read" not deleted ?
Message "read" not deleted ?
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I reckon if I send 10 private messages I get around 3 responses,2 deleted and 5 as read that remain read and don't get deleted.
You know where you stand via responses/deleted but how about with read?
After a few days is that similar to deleted and they simply haven't bothered to hit delete or are they half interested and considering you for a potential meet? |
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Some people get so many messages they never work their way down to reading yours and will eventually bulk delete unread messages.
Don't think too much about it, just carry on looking through profiles, and send decent messages to the ones who you feel you match. No easy answer to Fab demographics |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Some people get so many messages they never work their way down to reading yours and will eventually bulk delete unread messages.
Don't think too much about it, just carry on looking through profiles, and send decent messages to the ones who you feel you match. No easy answer to Fab demographics"
Agreed!!! |
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By * Jay69Man
over a year ago
Bridgwater - Somerset |
OP's question was 'Read but not deleted'
Don't know the answer to this one. One hopes it means they've decided to keep it for possible future reference, but could be because they've not got round to deletion? |
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"No mate you get me wrong I'm saying that it has been read not that it sits in their inbox as unread."
My apologies for the misread, but I feel what I said still applies in general, don't read anything into any message on here other than one that says : " yes we will meet you at X place at Y hour, see you there " |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I click into messages, read what I can. Delete those who say hi x fancy a fuck and keep going to the end. If I have time I will reply there and then. If not, they stay in my box  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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James if its any help if you are mailing couples many will leave it 'read' so the other partner can read it too before deciding whether they are interested in you. Sometimes they may either forget to delete you - or so many new messages come in they just dont get back to the earlier messages. Don't sweat it - its not something you should take personally - just keep trying xx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Means nothing really, sometimes read things on the phone and don't answer due to hassle with predictive text and clumsy thumbs, Sometimes don't answer due to only one of us having seen the message, Sometimes answer on behalf of the other partner, but usually only social stuff for those we know, think we have a couple of messages that are months old that haven't been deleted yet, whilst others get deleted quickly.
Sometimes we actually answer messages, that is the only one that means anything. IF you get an answer then follow up accordingly, if not forget it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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From some of your previous posts, I'm pretty sure yours would be a well thought out, polite and possibly humorous message.
If I happened to check online and saw a message that someone has put some thought into then I would want to reply with the same level of thought and effort which would probably mean I would reply later on.
Sometimes tho, as others have said, once the message goes out of the line of sight (as I only use my phone to access fab), sometimes messages are
Read and then forgotten |
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By *harpDressed ManMan
over a year ago
Here occasionally, but mostly somewhere else |
Serious suggestion - don't look at your sent messages. No good can come of it.
Just assume everybody deleted them unread, and then when anyone does reply, you'll be in an even more positive frame of mind when you respond to them.
You can't learn anything from your sent messages folder. |
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"I reckon if I send 10 private messages I get around 3 responses,2 deleted and 5 as read that remain read and don't get deleted.
You know where you stand via responses/deleted but how about with read?
After a few days is that similar to deleted and they simply haven't bothered to hit delete or are they half interested and considering you for a potential meet? "
I take read-not deleted- not replied as 'no thanks'.
If I see that they've looked at my profile, I take that as the message provoked some interest but my profile wasn't to their liking. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I always reply, even if it's a thank you but no thank you x think its rude not to.
However, I do get amused sometimes! A guy sent me a message 15 minutes ago - I hadn't got round to replying immediately, 15 mins later I went to do so - only to find myself blocked x
now that's what I call impatient!!! lol  |
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"I reckon if I send 10 private messages I get around 3 responses,2 deleted and 5 as read that remain read and don't get deleted.
You know where you stand via responses/deleted but how about with read?
After a few days is that similar to deleted and they simply haven't bothered to hit delete or are they half interested and considering you for a potential meet? "
we dont delete any at the time they all stay there until we are sure both of us read them. and then we just have a delete session every so often. so our not deleted messages mean that we just havent deleted it yet nothing more than that. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Serious suggestion - don't look at your sent messages. No good can come of it.
Just assume everybody deleted them unread, and then when anyone does reply, you'll be in an even more positive frame of mind when you respond to them.
You can't learn anything from your sent messages folder."
I think being able to see whether someone has read/ not read/ deleted mail is a bit of a mindfuck really. Would be better if it was like normal email where you have no idea. Then you can move on if they don't reply, rather than wondering why they read but didn't delete.
On our couple profile we log on at different times so leave mail for the other person to read. Could be the same for others. |
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"From some of your previous posts, I'm pretty sure yours would be a well thought out, polite and possibly humorous message.
If I happened to check online and saw a message that someone has put some thought into then I would want to reply with the same level of thought and effort which would probably mean I would reply later on.
Sometimes tho, as others have said, once the message goes out of the line of sight (as I only use my phone to access fab), sometimes messages are
Read and then forgotten "
Was liking this until the " possibly " reference  lol |
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By *ohohoWoman
over a year ago
Up North |
"Serious suggestion - don't look at your sent messages. No good can come of it.
Just assume everybody deleted them unread, and then when anyone does reply, you'll be in an even more positive frame of mind when you respond to them.
You can't learn anything from your sent messages folder."
Well said!
I delete my sent messages, if I get a reply great! If not I have no idea what they have done with the message, it's actually a lot less stressful. 
I sometimes leave messages if I intend to reply to them later btw. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"From some of your previous posts, I'm pretty sure yours would be a well thought out, polite and possibly humorous message.
If I happened to check online and saw a message that someone has put some thought into then I would want to reply with the same level of thought and effort which would probably mean I would reply later on.
Sometimes tho, as others have said, once the message goes out of the line of sight (as I only use my phone to access fab), sometimes messages are
Read and then forgotten
Was liking this until the " possibly " reference lol"
The "few" messages I do get, I read them all straightaway and reply accordingly. Delete if they are of the "fancy a fuck" or "hi how are you" variety, means they cant or havent bothered to read my profile, which is a little long but ive seen longer. I only save messages if someone has given me their no or other info, such as a pic and I want to keep it - that is because I think they are worth remembering.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Just means ive not deleted yet. Weve got loads of read but not deleted......perhaps one day ill hit the delete all button.
Rule of thumb for me on here or even when I was dating in the vanilla world..... if someone doesn't reply theyre just not that into you. |
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For me I have sometimes read a message but not answered straight away and before logging on again got a load new ones so that read message got bumped to new page and may not see it again for days,until I work through new messages |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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OP why are concerned about such things. So what if a message has been read and not deleted. Don't let yourself be worried over whether it's a maybe and behind the scenes negotiations are taking place. It's not important is it, it's only sex and swinging.
Only give it thought if a person messages back with a date to meet, anything else isn't worth wasting time over. |
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