FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > My Manager
My Manager
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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My manager at work has found out from my browsing history I have been visiting Fabs site regularly. Ever since she has become a little curious and often asks me about the site. Now she is asking me to set up a profile for her so that she could experience it herself. I did tell her she could signup herself but why me.
Now she tells me I should share all my activities on Fabs with her else I will be in trouble. This is purely bizzare and unusual but I am having to deal with it. Any suggestions as to how to deal with this saga please? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I think the moral here is why on earth browse this site at work? 
It sounds like blackmail to me, problem is that by reporting it you are setting yourself up to be disciplined, and potentially viewing this site is gross misconduct.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot 
Typical  "
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak "
You just want a meet don't you  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you "
On a Sunday is that not a sin? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Send her email wording carefully you do not feel comfortable with it. Ensure it requires a read receipt so you have proof its been read. And or record next conversation on your phone then turn tables on him or her.
Must say bloody stupid of you to browse at work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you
On a Sunday is that not a sin? "
Noooooo |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you
On a Sunday is that not a sin?
Noooooo "
Oh really? what do you suggest I do then? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you
On a Sunday is that not a sin?
Noooooo
Oh really? what do you suggest I do then? "
What would you like to do |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I bet it is all under you're account as well so you are going to be the one who gets it in the neck if an admin starts looking into web activities.
I would get her into it a much as possible and get all the info you can to protect yourself if and when the time comes.
she is using you as a shield to do what she does not have the guts to do herself.
Bloody stupid to browse any adult site at work though as the system records everything
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Why oh why were you browsing FAB at work?
She is blackmailing you, but you've kinda set yourself up by being stupid & accessing this site at work.
The way I see it you've got 3 options.
1. Find another job and leave.
2. Set up her profile and basically become her FAB bitch.
3. Report get for inappropriate behaviour, however you will also be outing yourself for accessing the this,
You've got yourself in a right pickle and if it was me, I'd be on monster looking for a new job! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I think the moral here is why on earth browse this site at work?
It sounds like blackmail to me, problem is that by reporting it you are setting yourself up to be disciplined, and potentially viewing this site is gross misconduct.
"
You fool, fancy browsing at work well you have well and truly set yourself up here mate
The moral to this story don't browse at work your there to work |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you
On a Sunday is that not a sin?
Noooooo
Oh really? what do you suggest I do then?
What would you like to do "
Something sweet and innocent |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Send her email wording carefully you do not feel comfortable with it. Ensure it requires a read receipt so you have proof its been read. And or record next conversation on your phone then turn tables on him or her.
Must say bloody stupid of you to browse at work."
I am with you on this one.
Also delete your profile, and stop using company software to browse. Use your phone!!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you
On a Sunday is that not a sin?
Noooooo
Oh really? what do you suggest I do then?
What would you like to do
Something sweet and innocent"
Counts me out on both of them |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Send her email wording carefully you do not feel comfortable with it. Ensure it requires a read receipt so you have proof its been read. And or record next conversation on your phone then turn tables on him or her.
Must say bloody stupid of you to browse at work.
I am with you on this one.
Also delete your profile, and stop using company software to browse. Use your phone!! "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Sounds like blackmail to me too.
If I were in this situation, I would write a grovelling letter to apologise, promising never to use company property and work time inappropriately, and copy in Human Resources on it.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you
On a Sunday is that not a sin?
Noooooo
Oh really? what do you suggest I do then?
What would you like to do
Something sweet and innocent
Counts me out on both of them "
How about fabolously filthy, hard and very messy? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My manager at work has found out from my browsing history I have been visiting Fabs site regularly. Ever since she has become a little curious and often asks me about the site. Now she is asking me to set up a profile for her so that she could experience it herself. I did tell her she could signup herself but why me.
wake up and stop dreamimg
Now she tells me I should share all my activities on Fabs with her else I will be in trouble. This is purely bizzare and unusual but I am having to deal with it. Any suggestions as to how to deal with this saga please?"
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It is shallow that im wondering if she is hot
Typical
Well surely the only way out of teh situation is to get her in a compromising position so to speak
You just want a meet don't you
On a Sunday is that not a sin?
Noooooo
Oh really? what do you suggest I do then?
What would you like to do
Something sweet and innocent
Counts me out on both of them
How about fabolously filthy, hard and very messy?"
Now you're talking |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't access Fab at work anymore. That way, if it does come out in the future you can say that you weren't aware it wasn't allowed but as soon as your manager made you aware of it you stopped. Don't play along with her and don't give her any details. Tell her she is making you feel uncomfortable and you want her to stop making comments. You could use the word harassment to frighten her off. Good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thank you all - some of your feedbacks are very encouraging and I will certainly keep all in mind. Yes it was rather unfortunate on my part to have accessed the site whilst at work. What I have gathered recently that she has been divorced about a month ago. I feel sorry for her but beginning to wonder if that has got to do anything with the present saga. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sounds like blackmail to me too.
If I were in this situation, I would write a grovelling letter to apologise, promising never to use company property and work time inappropriately, and copy in Human Resources on it.
"
.
I forgot to add, after writing to the manager and copying HR, I would delete my profile, start a new one, and only browse/post via my phone during work hours.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You need to come clean about your unusual fetishes. Think
Of something that you know she won't go along with...
Or tell her you only play like this as a Dom so if she wants to play too she has to be sub. Then you can redress the balance and also be in total charge |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Sounds like blackmail to me too.
If I were in this situation, I would write a grovelling letter to apologise, promising never to use company property and work time inappropriately, and copy in Human Resources on it.
.
I forgot to add, after writing to the manager and copying HR, I would delete my profile, start a new one, and only browse/post via my phone during work hours. "
Tactfully put. I'd have started with... Dear Schmuck, YOU'RE SO FIRED!
Close your account unless she looks like Jennifer Aniston in the movie "Bad Bosses". |
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By *risbsMan
over a year ago
Cardiff |
"Don't access Fab at work anymore. That way, if it does come out in the future you can say that you weren't aware it wasn't allowed but as soon as your manager made you aware of it you stopped. Don't play along with her and don't give her any details. Tell her she is making you feel uncomfortable and you want her to stop making comments. You could use the word harassment to frighten her off. Good luck."
IMO, probably the best advice on this. Depending on the size of your company they may have an IT usage policy and if they do then browsing FAB would be more than likely be gross misconduct, and instant dismissal.
However, it seems like your boss wants to call the shots in a different way. Any mention of harrassment will send a manager into a mass panic. (I'm a manager and having to deal with a sexual harassment problem amongst two of my staff at the moment). Not fun, I can assure you.
That might neutralise it but as has been said, don't get involved with her, get another profile asap and never, ever log on to FAB using your work PC again. Not even during breaks. On most medium/large business IT systems sites like this are blocked, so I'm guessing you probably work for a smaller outfit. If that's the case, a letter to HR might not be appropriate, and FFS do not try to record a conversation without her consent (which she would be incredibly unlikely to give). It's illegal and would only make matters worse.
Good luck though, and if it starts going Pete Tong, which I hope it does not, consider contacting ACAS who will have some good advice and will have seen it all before!
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Thanks. There's no such thing as instant dismissal and if it was a first offence with only Fab being accessed then it's unlikely to result in dismissal. More likely to be a written warning of some level. Covert recordings can be admissible as evidence based on recent case law. Hopefully a warning shot across her bows should do the trick. Good luck with the sexual harassment case! |
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"Thanks. There's no such thing as instant dismissal and if it was a first offence with only Fab being accessed then it's unlikely to result in dismissal. More likely to be a written warning of some level. Covert recordings can be admissible as evidence based on recent case law. Hopefully a warning shot across her bows should do the trick. Good luck with the sexual harassment case!"
using work computers for non business related reasons can result in dismissal for gross misconduct in many companies. Especially as Fab is classed as an adult site.
Personally i cant believe anyone would be so stupid as to access fab on work computers..completely idiotic and a case of someones little head ruling all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Solution don't use the works Internet to browse fab. Use your phone. As for the boss set up a profile for them then he/she won't have that power over you of using your lifestyle as a threat. If you know what's mean? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Back when I was a wee'un working in a call centre, there was a lovely ex-army guy who was quite into body art (or tattoos to you and me) he got canned for looking at a website that speciaised in, shall we say, female body art. |
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"The OP hasn't been suspended so dismissal for gross misconduct is highly unlikely and open to legal challenge."
only because his 'boss' apparently wants in on this highly secretive, couldnt find it on google, invite only, secret society website |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Id just wldnt say anything about it and if she mentons this place again just say u hv closed yr account now and dont cum on here.
I wldnt cum on here during work anyway. A i havent got the time and B i wldnt use my works computer. Id use my fone |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The OP hasn't been suspended so dismissal for gross misconduct is highly unlikely and open to legal challenge."
As above, he would have had to have been suspended immediately pending an investigation, this hasn't happened so its either a wind up or his boss is leaving the company wide open for technical legalities if they do sack him. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Thanks guys for all your suggestions. Will it be sensible to change my profile user name and contents as opposed to closing down for a new one. Reason being, over the years I have met and have a long list of friends coupled with a few verifications which I may be losing out should I close. Any thoughts please? |
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My instinct is that asking you to set up an account for her could be a trap (ie she could deny that she asked you to do it). Changing your profile name sounds like a good idea and you may want to consider hiding your profile until it blows over too. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My manager at work has found out from my browsing history I have been visiting Fabs site regularly. Ever since she has become a little curious and often asks me about the site. Now she is asking me to set up a profile for her so that she could experience it herself. I did tell her she could signup herself but why me.
Now she tells me I should share all my activities on Fabs with her else I will be in trouble. This is purely bizzare and unusual but I am having to deal with it. Any suggestions as to how to deal with this saga please?"
she has you by the balls
sounds like she wants you to be her bitch in time
so let her use you or do a runner
just delete your browsing history
then set it to delete your browsing history every time |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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few things... if she has u on her hotlist then even a name change wont affect anything - chances are she already has a profile on here now.
Also if u have violated the company IT policy you can be dismissed instantly, and im guessing she clever enough to have not put anything in writing so if you do mention it to HR your on a hiding to nothing.
You sure she just doesnt want to have a shag - seriously??? She might be using fab as a way to mention it to you that she fancies you? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"My manager at work has found out from my browsing history I have been visiting Fabs site regularly. Ever since she has become a little curious and often asks me about the site. Now she is asking me to set up a profile for her so that she could experience it herself. I did tell her she could signup herself but why me.
Now she tells me I should share all my activities on Fabs with her else I will be in trouble. This is purely bizzare and unusual but I am having to deal with it. Any suggestions as to how to deal with this saga please?"
What's her profile name? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks guys for all your suggestions. Will it be sensible to change my profile user name and contents as opposed to closing down for a new one. Reason being, over the years I have met and have a long list of friends coupled with a few verifications which I may be losing out should I close. Any thoughts please?"
Is it fab you work for lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You should have been working! Serves you right! :P
It's a bluff. You'll both be outed and in trouble as she should have taken disciplinary action against you when she found out. By asking for more info and a profile herself means if it gets out, you both might lose your jobs! Set up the profile and you both have to keep your mouth shut.
And use your phone to browse fabs, you nutter!  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Thanks guys for all your suggestions. Will it be sensible to change my profile user name and contents as opposed to closing down for a new one. Reason being, over the years I have met and have a long list of friends coupled with a few verifications which I may be losing out should I close. Any thoughts please?"
My thoughts...
Stop being so precious about a profile. Those verifications can be repeated. The 'friends' you have made will not back you up if this goes public. Your friends will also not support you financially should you lose your job.
Delete delete delete.
Another thought....
If you set up a profile for her, do it on her software using pics she has mailed from her email ( personal) account to the site.
Last thought.... Tell her you have left the site. |
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"The OP hasn't been suspended so dismissal for gross misconduct is highly unlikely and open to legal challenge."
not if the company has an internet policy which most companies do..
firstly there would be a conversation followed by suspension followed by a investigation where all his internet traffic would be investigated, then all evidence would be presented at a disciplinary hearing where all the facts will be discussed and any mitigating circumstances considered before being dismissed..conduct relating to anything of a sexual nature very rarely have a happy ending in the work place.
because this is an adult sex site he wouldn't have a leg to stand on and pleading ignorance of any internet policy would not stand up.
using your own phone to access whilst on company property and during company time could also land him in hot water.
use of mobiles during company time is frowned up on by many companies..
it only takes one person to see over your shoulder etc to take offense to again find yourself in trouble..
if you must access during your shift make sure you're away from others and preferably off site.
if you're an employer where staff have access to the internet and you don't have a policy, get one!
it protects you, your company and the staff.
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