FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Profile review please
Profile review please
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Hi
Not having much luck on here at all, and feeling very demotivated. Thought I’d ask if there is anything I could improve on my profile.
Maybe however I’m too old for this and not good looking enough! Any advice on things personally I could change to improve my chances would be appreciated also. Happy to supply face pic if required too. Not on profile as I’m professional and need to be discreet.
thanks in advance! |
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"Hi
Not having much luck on here at all, and feeling very demotivated. Thought I’d ask if there is anything I could improve on my profile.
Maybe however I’m too old for this and not good looking enough! Any advice on things personally I could change to improve my chances would be appreciated also. Happy to supply face pic if required too. Not on profile as I’m professional and need to be discreet.
thanks in advance! "
Oh the other ladies will give you lots of tips but I just want to say that you have to make more effort with your photos. In my mind, they are not the most seductive.
I googled "male boudoir" and oh my days as they say in London...
You are not too old. You need to be more confident because you are going to need that if you have to go to clubs and parties and any group sex scenarios.
P.S. Not everyone is turned on by dic pics in bed. It's actually too vanilla I think.
I went to a hetero-based party and there was a guy in a pink harness outfit with a sign saying "For your use".....Oh my days that was hot. |
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Thanks Melanin, great feedback. Just done a bit of googling around Male Boudoir and I can see the attraction but not sure I have the body/abs for it. Not sure I’ve ever had that sort of body even when younger. Is it the muscles/abs or more the look/style?
Appreciate I could more effort in to the production quality of the photos.
Do worry that maybe I won’t have the confidence either. Im an introvert, but consider that my strength. I’m very good in a more intimate/ personal setting. It’s why I’ve of been to clubs yet, although I did really enjoy a naturist beach which was very liberating |
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Somewhat vague about much, though lots of words saying this. People prefer the reality of now and what you can give them now, if chosen. They are to make choice between you and others and the man who is closest to their tastes will be picked.
Start with realistic expectations and lose getting disheartened - an incredibly tiny amount of people are mutually compatible. It's probably about 1% maybe less. So you won't fit them and/or vice versa. Fit your expectations to that, not what you'd like in the ideal, fantasy world.
Make your profile reveal why they should pick you and it's great.
Discard more than 1 public pie of your cock. Show what someone would need to be able to make a good decision on whether they might want to physically engage with you. Make it such that they'd really know how you look physically. |
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"Thanks Melanin, great feedback. Just done a bit of googling around Male Boudoir and I can see the attraction but not sure I have the body/abs for it. Not sure I’ve ever had that sort of body even when younger. Is it the muscles/abs or more the look/style?
Appreciate I could more effort in to the production quality of the photos.
Do worry that maybe I won’t have the confidence either. Im an introvert, but consider that my strength. I’m very good in a more intimate/ personal setting. It’s why I’ve of been to clubs yet, although I did really enjoy a naturist beach which was very liberating"
The posing, the lighting and the props more than muscles and 6 packs....Since I'm soft and cuddly I like soft and cuddly guys....I think in the gay scene they call them "bears"
A few years back women were calling it dad bods.
I find older men more..sensual, tactile and confident.
Younger men make up for it in stamina and are nice to look at but not cuddly and might break my hip. Lol!
Oh being introverted is hard...My default is to be alone but it does nothing for my mental health or autism management so I have to force myself to go out and socialise.
I have no idea how to get people who are not introverted to engage on a regular basis with introverts.
I often have to leave my introverted friends at home while I go outside for some desperate need of outdoor connection.
Helps that sex is like an autistic special interest for me so I get distracted from my own weirdness watching people do all kinds of sexual and kinky and fetish things.
Naturism also helps with seeing all different body types of all ages...instead of being stuck at home watching specially honed porn bodies which is in no way representative of the average population bodies. A lot of men unfortunately are disappointed when they do not attract women who look like porn actresses.
Going outside keeps my brain firmly grounded in reality. Porn actors and actresses are not walking down my local high street so I shouldn't expect them in my local swinger/kink/fetish/ BDSM scene.
hope you have more insight. If you don't go outside you are going to have to work 1000 times harder to convince a woman/couple to come to your place for sex. That's the sad reality.
I checked a 5-mile radius with another Fab mate, and he had 300 women in a 5-mile radius, and I had over 1000 men. As single people, couples are even more picky and time-constrained. This is London, where there are about 4.5 million men for me to choose from and 0.5 non-binary in a 20 miles radius. |
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"Somewhat vague about much, though lots of words saying this. People prefer the reality of now and what you can give them now, if chosen. They are to make choice between you and others and the man who is closest to their tastes will be picked.
Start with realistic expectations and lose getting disheartened - an incredibly tiny amount of people are mutually compatible. It's probably about 1% maybe less. So you won't fit them and/or vice versa. Fit your expectations to that, not what you'd like in the ideal, fantasy world.
Make your profile reveal why they should pick you and it's great.
Discard more than 1 public pie of your cock. Show what someone would need to be able to make a good decision on whether they might want to physically engage with you. Make it such that they'd really know how you look physically. "
Yup the girlies are coming through...  
Yeah I'm more practical than understanding what people socially are attracted to.
I'm cheating by showing my face though. lol! |
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"Thanks Melanin, great feedback. Just done a bit of googling around Male Boudoir and I can see the attraction but not sure I have the body/abs for it. Not sure I’ve ever had that sort of body even when younger. Is it the muscles/abs or more the look/style?
Appreciate I could more effort in to the production quality of the photos.
Do worry that maybe I won’t have the confidence either. Im an introvert, but consider that my strength. I’m very good in a more intimate/ personal setting. It’s why I’ve of been to clubs yet, although I did really enjoy a naturist beach which was very liberating
The posing, the lighting and the props more than muscles and 6 packs....Since I'm soft and cuddly I like soft and cuddly guys....I think in the gay scene they call them "bears"
A few years back women were calling it dad bods.
I find older men more..sensual, tactile and confident.
Younger men make up for it in stamina and are nice to look at but not cuddly and might break my hip. Lol!
Oh being introverted is hard...My default is to be alone but it does nothing for my mental health or autism management so I have to force myself to go out and socialise.
I have no idea how to get people who are not introverted to engage on a regular basis with introverts.
I often have to leave my introverted friends at home while I go outside for some desperate need of outdoor connection.
Helps that sex is like an autistic special interest for me so I get distracted from my own weirdness watching people do all kinds of sexual and kinky and fetish things.
Naturism also helps with seeing all different body types of all ages...instead of being stuck at home watching specially honed porn bodies which is in no way representative of the average population bodies. A lot of men unfortunately are disappointed when they do not attract women who look like porn actresses.
Going outside keeps my brain firmly grounded in reality. Porn actors and actresses are not walking down my local high street so I shouldn't expect them in my local swinger/kink/fetish/ BDSM scene.
hope you have more insight. If you don't go outside you are going to have to work 1000 times harder to convince a woman/couple to come to your place for sex. That's the sad reality.
I checked a 5-mile radius with another Fab mate, and he had 300 women in a 5-mile radius, and I had over 1000 men. As single people, couples are even more picky and time-constrained. This is London, where there are about 4.5 million men for me to choose from and 0.5 non-binary in a 20 miles radius."
Thanks, amazing advice. Thankyou for taking the time to reply in such detail you are awesome.
I do get out a lot, my introversion isn’t that bad thankfully. It’s just I’m not the life and souls of a party. I’m not great in groups, but I am good and more comfortable 1 to 1 when I’m not trying to impress. Helps if we talk about something I’m passionate about or have an interest in which takes the pressure off. Most people seem to enjoy talking to me on eve I’ve let my guard down. Not sure how this would all pan out in a club hence I was hoping to meet someone or a couple on here. Not had much luck with my wonky picture so far though.
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"Somewhat vague about much, though lots of words saying this. People prefer the reality of now and what you can give them now, if chosen. They are to make choice between you and others and the man who is closest to their tastes will be picked.
Start with realistic expectations and lose getting disheartened - an incredibly tiny amount of people are mutually compatible. It's probably about 1% maybe less. So you won't fit them and/or vice versa. Fit your expectations to that, not what you'd like in the ideal, fantasy world.
Make your profile reveal why they should pick you and it's great.
Discard more than 1 public pie of your cock. Show what someone would need to be able to make a good decision on whether they might want to physically engage with you. Make it such that they'd really know how you look physically. "
Thankyou Sophie, will take it all on onboard. I think I’m disheartened as I have tried to contact so many people and been rejected loads. Does make you feel insecure after a while. |
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Set your camera on a shelf or a chair and put it in selfie mode on a timer.
Pose. It'll feel silly. Delete the photos you don't like.
Edit. Every camera can filter and edit photos easily now so have a poke around in your phone .
You'd be surprised how easy it is to make a lackluster photo look good with a bit of cropping and a filter |
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By *andSxxCouple 4 weeks ago
Birmingham |
1. More varied images. 4 cock pictures do not attract couples and women.
2. You are never old. The number does not reflect your feelings and value.
3. Your profile text is good. It can be appreciated that it is own, unique. It was not selected from others text.
4. Patience. If you are persistent, you will succeed. We have many friend couple here who met at fab. |
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