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By (user no longer on site) OP 10 weeks ago
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Hi all… so seems I need advice.
I’ve been on fab a while. However struggling to actually meet anyone. My husband has low libido so sex is a struggle. My consciousness about meeting is struggling with the what if I get hurt by the male.
The flip side is I need to feel wanted. So social meets would be good. Live is Suffolk. |
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If I can be really blunt, yes it’s lovely to feel wanted and a lot of men would love to meet you. But you have a partner for emotional support and commitment. The men on here are for pleasure, just enjoy it for what it is. Get to a social and take the pressure off, just chat to people in person. There are some really great people on here. Men and women 😁 best of luck xx |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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I think there's 2 things here.
People say socials, so that could help with confidence, talking and with different people and you can leave when you want to leave.
Then there's the profile, and that's what probably 1/3 of the forums threads are about...asking advice on profile
So take a look at them, the advice is going to be similar for men and women and that's to have a interesting profile and pics |
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"Physically hurt x"
If you meet in public first and sound them out. I’m not sure if anyone has experienced physical abuse on here. I’ve never felt threatened from meeting anyone. I’ve been on for 6 yrs now met loads of people and never been physically hurt. I don’t know if that helps but you might be over thinking everything far too much. Sending big hugs I feel your struggle x |
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You can always consider meeting couples where the risks arguably lower but honestly you should always remain in control of who you meet and how far you go. For the many disrespectful people out there, there are plenty of wonderful ones. We have had nothing but good experience but it’s also because we never rush into a meet xxx |
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I think you're very brave reaching out on your own, so I can appreciate the trepidation aspect. I can't advise you what to do as a man, but I can recommend making friends on here, as in girls and couples with no expectation, go for a social coffee and build your environment up a little. It may help with those fears.
I've been to a lot of socials over many years and there is very, very, rarely any troubles with well organised and established events with good organisers. And if ever there was an idiot breaking the rules, everyone knew and it was dealt with accordingly.
Always go with your gut feelings on this, think about what you want and how you want it.
Best of luck   |
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Always have a public social with anyone first op.Don't go straight to someone's home without one.
Make sure your partner knows who you're meeting and where you'll be, they could even collect you if they're happy to.
Chat for as long as it takes to feel comfortable with anyone, then meet only when you're ready.
Go at your pace and make sure you establish your own boundaries and ensure any potential meets know about these.
It can be scary meeting as a single, but most people here are decent, obviously you do get the odd wrong un.
Would your partner help you vet meets or go to a social with you, that may help you relax a bit. |
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Meet in a public place for a social, chat a lot ahead of time. Make sure someone knows where you're going. It's no different to standard online dating in many respects.
Clubs have cctv and staff to get rid of any unwanted attentions. |
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By *elkieWoman 10 weeks ago
Durham |
You need to build your trust in yourself, that you are able to speak up and ask for what you need, whether that’s to stop and slow down or more, or different. This confidence comes with time, IME.
I also find clubs easier emotionally: and I know couples who both go to swingers clubs but only one of them plays. |
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By (user no longer on site) 10 weeks ago
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Some advice would be great..
I've been on here a while and not had much luck meeting people.
I'm a single guy and I'm most definitely not just looking a random hook up.
I just don't want a relationship ATM but I want something regular and with someone like minded..
But my issue is, how can I get that message across as a load of guys just talk shit and lie, and ruin it for the decent ones.
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In a similar position, please do DM me as I may have a few insights.
So did meet someone on Tinder last year and had an amazing time with her till she wanted a boyfriend which was not for me.
My wife's drive is lower than mine, and we've found a natural compromise, and I'm very happy. |
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"Some advice would be great..
I've been on here a while and not had much luck meeting people.
I'm a single guy and I'm most definitely not just looking a random hook up.
I just don't want a relationship ATM but I want something regular and with someone like minded..
But my issue is, how can I get that message across as a load of guys just talk shit and lie, and ruin it for the decent ones.
"
You have 2 verifications from TV/TS? Neither displayed? Yet you’re straight (according to your profile) Probably best to not talk about others taking shit and lying 🤷🏻♂️ |
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