FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Hi Guys, Just wondering how everyones luck is going on here
Hi Guys, Just wondering how everyones luck is going on here
Jump to: Newest in thread
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
I’ve really enjoyed my years of meeting likeminded people through Fab, and would happily recommend this site to other guys. It’s rarely an ‘instant win’ for a single guy in here, so you do need patience, but I wouldn’t ever point a mate in the direction of the clubs scene. At least in Fab, you are treated as an equal….. 
Keep the faith fella, because it will happen  | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hello again Dave! Sorry to hear you’re still not having any luck in here
I’ve really enjoyed my years of meeting likeminded people through Fab, and would happily recommend this site to other guys. It’s rarely an ‘instant win’ for a single guy in here, so you do need patience, but I wouldn’t ever point a mate in the direction of the clubs scene. At least in Fab, you are treated as an equal…..
Keep the faith fella, because it will happen "Interesting to hear your perception/take on this. My experience has been precisely the opposite. I've found Fab to be largely unfriendly, cold at times, but a club environment (depending on which club) to be far more welcoming. Funny how things pan out. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hello again Dave! Sorry to hear you’re still not having any luck in here
I’ve really enjoyed my years of meeting likeminded people through Fab, and would happily recommend this site to other guys. It’s rarely an ‘instant win’ for a single guy in here, so you do need patience, but I wouldn’t ever point a mate in the direction of the clubs scene. At least in Fab, you are treated as an equal…..
Keep the faith fella, because it will happen
Interesting to hear your perception/take on this. My experience has been precisely the opposite. I've found Fab to be largely unfriendly, cold at times, but a club environment (depending on which club) to be far more welcoming. Funny how things pan out."I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility…..  Clubs are for couples, leave them to it | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility….. Clubs are for couples, leave them to it "One thing id say about club nights is they aren't all created equally, id say some are better for single men than others. GreedyGirl or hotwife nights would be a good bet. Single guys we’ve seen have success talk to people, arent creepy, don't follow couples around staring etc.. ask qualifying questions, what are you looking for? etc | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hello again Dave! Sorry to hear you’re still not having any luck in here
I’ve really enjoyed my years of meeting likeminded people through Fab, and would happily recommend this site to other guys. It’s rarely an ‘instant win’ for a single guy in here, so you do need patience, but I wouldn’t ever point a mate in the direction of the clubs scene. At least in Fab, you are treated as an equal…..
Keep the faith fella, because it will happen
Interesting to hear your perception/take on this. My experience has been precisely the opposite. I've found Fab to be largely unfriendly, cold at times, but a club environment (depending on which club) to be far more welcoming. Funny how things pan out.
I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility….. Clubs are for couples, leave them to it "Mr did very well as a single guy at clubs before we met, probably better than we do as a couple... so clubs are definitely not just for couples. I've recommended clubs to many single guy friends and majority of them have had great times. As long as a guy can socialise and follow social cues, there is no reason they can't be a success at a club | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility….. Clubs are for couples, leave them to it
One thing id say about club nights is they aren't all created equally, id say some are better for single men than others. GreedyGirl or hotwife nights would be a good bet. Single guys we’ve seen have success talk to people, arent creepy, don't follow couples around staring etc.. ask qualifying questions, what are you looking for? etc"Agreed! I've found 'Dangerous Curves' at Libs to be one of the best, along with 'Curvaceous Creatures' at Purple Mamba IF a single guy is capable of making genuine, friendly conversation as in any other social situation. Letting people make their minds up about us as a human being first goes a long way, along with avoiding any sexual conversation, other than smiling, eye contact and light flirting IF things are already going well. Be an attractive proposition as a person first and foremost (which has very little to do with looks!) and allow people to get to know you organically. Being creepy, wandering constantly and not engaging socially is likely to get you a stiff ignoring to - and comes across as creepy. If you can't make a woman feel safe and comfortable in your company you need to go away and have a look at yourself in the mirror. All of the above has been very successful for me - naturally and without 'effort'. Just being your authentic self as you would be in any social setting. Also remember women aren't pieces of meat just because it's a club setting. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility….. Clubs are for couples, leave them to it
One thing id say about club nights is they aren't all created equally, id say some are better for single men than others. GreedyGirl or hotwife nights would be a good bet. Single guys we’ve seen have success talk to people, arent creepy, don't follow couples around staring etc.. ask qualifying questions, what are you looking for? etc"Clubs and club nights aren't all created equally, I agree with you there... While a 'Greedy Girl' style event could be interesting from a purely voyeuristic point, I have no personal desire to be 'No.43' on someone's clicker count to a new pb. Also; I'm not aware of any 'Hotwife' style events in the NW or NE (I'm in Cumbria btw), but to be fair, clubs aren't overflowing with single ladies, no matter how cheap they make the entry fees, so all the fun I've had in clubs has only been with couples anyway  I do appreciate the thought though | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hello again Dave! Sorry to hear you’re still not having any luck in here
I’ve really enjoyed my years of meeting likeminded people through Fab, and would happily recommend this site to other guys. It’s rarely an ‘instant win’ for a single guy in here, so you do need patience, but I wouldn’t ever point a mate in the direction of the clubs scene. At least in Fab, you are treated as an equal…..
Keep the faith fella, because it will happen
Interesting to hear your perception/take on this. My experience has been precisely the opposite. I've found Fab to be largely unfriendly, cold at times, but a club environment (depending on which club) to be far more welcoming. Funny how things pan out.
I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility….. Clubs are for couples, leave them to it
Mr did very well as a single guy at clubs before we met, probably better than we do as a couple... so clubs are definitely not just for couples.
I've recommended clubs to many single guy friends and majority of them have had great times. As long as a guy can socialise and follow social cues, there is no reason they can't be a success at a club "Exactly my thoughts. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Get your best undies on, splash of nice aftershave, and head for a club. While there, sit back, relax, smile and let the couples get fed up of the permawanking pests. As a couple we have been sat next to another couple for ages, and all it would have taken is simply saying hello and introducing yourself. End of the day, some people are really confident, some are really shy, and all it takes is a smile (dont forget your best undies and nice aftershave) "Agree with this to some extent, as I've had a great deal of success in the good clubs. Does depend on where though. The ones I've mentioned previously have been excellent, whereas places such as Chams (Darlaston) have been somewhere between unsociable and downright hostile.....despite me being as you describe, with couples being the most 'negative' overall. Sometimes even smiling in someone's direction can elicit an extremely uncalled for response. All that being said I've met some incredible people over time though - men, women and couples - who are very much (and very real) friends who I'd go a long way out of my way for. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Although I'm on here every day, I've not posted on the forums for a while. I've been concentrating on profiles and messaging people. I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. They say patience is a vertue, so I'm happy to keep trying to make a connection on here. Anyhow, I hope you are all having better luck than me on here. Best wishes. " I bang as often as a gate with a broken latch during a hurricane. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"More chance of a papal visit than getting a reply to a message. Just one of the reasons FAB has such a poor reputation as a swingers site. " For single men. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"More chance of a papal visit than getting a reply to a message. Just one of the reasons FAB has such a poor reputation as a swingers site. For single men. " Yep, absolutely, for most it seems. I keep telling guys not to bother as it's just a part of their day where they could be doing something positive instead. A few guys say (true or not) that they get messages regularly. If so good for them, but having been on Fab for quite a few years it's clear how it is for the majority. I don't for the life of me understand why anyone would keep doing that to themselves. Having stopped messaging two years ago I'm SO much happier for it and have no negative feelings about myself, or anyone. Lots of us bang on and on about better, more rewarding ways to go about things. Personally I'd be spending my time on here looking for the best socials and club events where it's not a completely wasted effort, rather than typing about how difficult it is.....also largely wasted effort. I mean no offence but why would anyone keep jumping through other people's hoops over time, only for the same kind of people to carry on ignoring them? 'Do what you've always done - get what you've always got' ring a bell? In essence don't waste your time on people who aren't worth that effort - it'll only make you feel more shit as time goes on - and no one is going to care one bit - especially not the people you want to reach out to. Be positive, be proactive. Be authentically you and let people see it in person. It absolutely works, as opposed to trying to get a potentially really great persona across in writing. Very difficult to do when there are hundreds doing the same. Don't follow the crowd, but be brave and get out there in person. BTW- if anyone's even remotely close to Gloucester, go to their social - I used to and it well and truly set me up on my way as a single fella. Pity I'm not closer, or I'd still be going. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Sadly, Fab is full of time wasters unfortunately. Of our 50 verifications, 2 have come from Fab meets. We have up trying to meet people from here a long time ago. Socials and clubs are the way forward for us these days and it works well. If we arrange to meet someone from Fab at a club and they don’t show up, we still have the club and potentially lots of other people. V&K xx" We are trying to get to clubs unfortunately the wife works night shift work including at least one night a weekend. So far the schedules haven't lined up. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Get your best undies on, splash of nice aftershave, and head for a club. While there, sit back, relax, smile and let the couples get fed up of the permawanking pests. As a couple we have been sat next to another couple for ages, and all it would have taken is simply saying hello and introducing yourself. End of the day, some people are really confident, some are really shy, and all it takes is a smile (dont forget your best undies and nice aftershave)
Agree with this to some extent, as I've had a great deal of success in the good clubs. Does depend on where though. The ones I've mentioned previously have been excellent, whereas places such as Chams (Darlaston) have been somewhere between unsociable and downright hostile.....despite me being as you describe, with couples being the most 'negative' overall. Sometimes even smiling in someone's direction can elicit an extremely uncalled for response.
All that being said I've met some incredible people over time though - men, women and couples - who are very much (and very real) friends who I'd go a long way out of my way for. "I would agree with your point about the "good clubs", although ultimately, a 'good club experience' is down to who you meet while you're there. I will sympathize with you about your comment about some clubs being unsociable and hostile towards single guys, I've been snapped at (We're not interested in single guys!), and seen the ubiquitous eye rolling as I've approached people, and been completely blanked while stood at a club bar! I've often wondered where all these ("everyone's always friendly in clubs") people are, before hitting my boredom threshold, and simply leaving. I haven't been to Libs or Purple Mamba though, the two clubs the bulk of your verifications appear to be from? They are two clubs which consistently receive positive reviews from single guys, and two clubs I would genuinely like to visit. It speaks volumes that you have other clubs on your doorstep, yet choose to travel away to visit these two | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Get your best undies on, splash of nice aftershave, and head for a club. While there, sit back, relax, smile and let the couples get fed up of the permawanking pests. As a couple we have been sat next to another couple for ages, and all it would have taken is simply saying hello and introducing yourself. End of the day, some people are really confident, some are really shy, and all it takes is a smile (dont forget your best undies and nice aftershave)
Agree with this to some extent, as I've had a great deal of success in the good clubs. Does depend on where though. The ones I've mentioned previously have been excellent, whereas places such as Chams (Darlaston) have been somewhere between unsociable and downright hostile.....despite me being as you describe, with couples being the most 'negative' overall. Sometimes even smiling in someone's direction can elicit an extremely uncalled for response.
All that being said I've met some incredible people over time though - men, women and couples - who are very much (and very real) friends who I'd go a long way out of my way for.
I would agree with your point about the "good clubs", although ultimately, a 'good club experience' is down to who you meet while you're there. I will sympathize with you about your comment about some clubs being unsociable and hostile towards single guys, I've been snapped at (We're not interested in single guys!), and seen the ubiquitous eye rolling as I've approached people, and been completely blanked while stood at a club bar! I've often wondered where all these ("everyone's always friendly in clubs") people are, before hitting my boredom threshold, and simply leaving.
I haven't been to Libs or Purple Mamba though, the two clubs the bulk of your verifications appear to be from? They are two clubs which consistently receive positive reviews from single guys, and two clubs I would genuinely like to visit. It speaks volumes that you have other clubs on your doorstep, yet choose to travel away to visit these two "I'd absolutely recommend certain events at both clubs, although I couldn't tell you what other nights are like to be honest. I've never had such positive experiences anywhere else if I'm honest - and it's been consistent. One thing I would say is that I live in two locations and one of them is very close to Libs, although Purple Mamba is well over an hours drive. Both absolutely worth a try. I know the organisers of both too and they're the kind of people who want everyone attending to have a great time, not just the few 'chosen ones'. As I've said on many occasions over time, I'm a very ordinary, average kinda guy. I've taken the time and trouble to get to know people and it's absolutely paid off. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hi OP, really sorry to hear about your experiences on here, and I'm really hoping things take a turn for the better for you. There doesn't seem to be a perfect panacea for men on here — what works for one person may not work for another and so forth; it's a mixed bag of p+sitive and negative outcomes. Take on board all the good advice given to you above and persevere. I don't do clubs (they simply don't interest me) and therefore cannot give you any advice on that. For me it's been a rewarding experience from two angles: receiving messages from women on here which lead to dates, trysts and dalliances, to attending fab socials for the libations and forging friendships. Bestowing all the luck for you, OP. 🌿🌿" Have to say I love the way you write Buddy. A lot of guys could discover a lot from your approach I suspect. Respect. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hi OP, really sorry to hear about your experiences on here, and I'm really hoping things take a turn for the better for you. There doesn't seem to be a perfect panacea for men on here — what works for one person may not work for another and so forth; it's a mixed bag of p+sitive and negative outcomes. Take on board all the good advice given to you above and persevere. I don't do clubs (they simply don't interest me) and therefore cannot give you any advice on that. For me it's been a rewarding experience from two angles: receiving messages from women on here which lead to dates, trysts and dalliances, to attending fab socials for the libations and forging friendships. Bestowing all the luck for you, OP. 🌿🌿 · Have to say I love the way you write Buddy. A lot of guys could discover a lot from your approach I suspect. Respect." • You're far too kind. 🦋🦋 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hi OP, really sorry to hear about your experiences on here, and I'm really hoping things take a turn for the better for you. There doesn't seem to be a perfect panacea for men on here — what works for one person may not work for another and so forth; it's a mixed bag of p+sitive and negative outcomes. Take on board all the good advice given to you above and persevere. I don't do clubs (they simply don't interest me) and therefore cannot give you any advice on that. For me it's been a rewarding experience from two angles: receiving messages from women on here which lead to dates, trysts and dalliances, to attending fab socials for the libations and forging friendships. Bestowing all the luck for you, OP. 🌿🌿" Thanks mate. I will persevere searching on here and messaging. It's heartening to read posts from the few single blokes who have had meets from FAB without going to clubs or organised group socials. I'm like you, I have no I terest in going to a club or organised group social. I glad you have had success on here mate. I know blokes who gave been to a club, and they all said the same, that they were totally ignored and felt humiliated by the experience. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have followed Dave’s trials and tribulations on the Fab forums for a long time now. I’d hazard a guess that he’s had more help and advice than any one else on here. But here we are back to square one and he’s no further forward. Unless you actually decide to follow up some of the advice given Dave and push yourself out of your comfort zone it’s not going to happen. There’s got to be compromise somewhere. The site works but you’ve got to be prepared to change the things that simply haven’t been working for you so far. There’s a lot of people who would love to see you succeed and meet someone. I wonder just how much you want it for yourself." Thanks for your lovely reply. I totally take on board your advice, but everyone is different, and not everyone is wanting to go to clubs or large organised socials. Everyone has their own views on how they wish to try and meet people. The fact I have been on here daily for almost three years, I would say that shows how much I want to meet people. I really appreciate your feedback. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"No lucks at all..my self esteem going downhill quite fast now. "Give it chance, you’ve only been here 6 weeks. It’s swinging, not insta shag x | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"From a personal perspective as a single fella turning up alone at a club can be intimidating especially if you have confidence/social anxiety issues. It's also (I've found) quite difficult to get in when many clubs and socials limit the number of single fellas (I understand and appreciate why but it doesn't alleviate the issue of getting an in person verification). Factor in time constraints due to other demands (work/family/volunteering) and it becomes an almost insurmountable problem. For me small intimate dinner/social gatherings work best but without building the contacts they won't happen, it's a bit chicken and egg really. I don't have a solution it's just an observation, some folks a naturally gregarious in parties others not - that's life. "Swinging is hobby. If you were allergic to bee stings would you take up beekeeping? Can't swim/take up waterskiing? And like any hobby if you want to partake you make the time. It's horses for courses. Swinging isn't for everybody and if you haven't the confidence or the social skills then maybe you need a different hobby. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I feel sorry for men on here. Woman definitely have the pick. I think there is 1 man to every woman on here. I'm not sure if clubs are the answer as you maybe stick out like a sore thumb if you were on your own. Just keep the faith and I hope things improve for you in the very near future . Take care x" xxx | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I feel sorry for men on here. Woman definitely have the pick. I think there is 1 man to every woman on here. I'm not sure if clubs are the answer as you maybe stick out like a sore thumb if you were on your own. Just keep the faith and I hope things improve for you in the very near future . Take care x" And as a woman who has only been here 6 weeks, you’ve already had two meets, which proves not only how much easier it is for single ladies in here, but also that other single men are getting meets….
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Have you tried going to clubs? They are a great place to mix and socialise" Expensive for single guys and aren't we just ads likely to be outnumbered or outclassed. Also I don't like performing to a crowd | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Have you tried going to clubs? They are a great place to mix and socialise Expensive for single guys and aren't we just ads likely to be outnumbered or outclassed. Also I don't like performing to a crowd" Some clubs have private playrooms, some don't, your choice. You will never be outnumbered the way you are on here. Outclassed? Just by turning up you put yourself in the top class. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I feel sorry for men on here. Woman definitely have the pick. I think there is 1 man to every woman on here. I'm not sure if clubs are the answer as you maybe stick out like a sore thumb if you were on your own. Just keep the faith and I hope things improve for you in the very near future . Take care x" Think women and couple get bombarded by messages from single guys - so they can pick and choose. Depends what you are looking for too. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"From a personal perspective as a single fella turning up alone at a club can be intimidating especially if you have confidence/social anxiety issues. It's also (I've found) quite difficult to get in when many clubs and socials limit the number of single fellas (I understand and appreciate why but it doesn't alleviate the issue of getting an in person verification). Factor in time constraints due to other demands (work/family/volunteering) and it becomes an almost insurmountable problem. For me small intimate dinner/social gatherings work best but without building the contacts they won't happen, it's a bit chicken and egg really. I don't have a solution it's just an observation, some folks a naturally gregarious in parties others not - that's life.
Swinging is hobby. If you were allergic to bee stings would you take up beekeeping? Can't swim/take up waterskiing?
And like any hobby if you want to partake you make the time.
It's horses for courses. Swinging isn't for everybody and if you haven't the confidence or the social skills then maybe you need a different hobby."Sorry but that's not a very inclusive comment and tends to promote clique. So you're saying that someone who enjoys this lifestyle but finds large groups difficult shouldn't be involved I find insulting. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Although I'm on here every day, I've not posted on the forums for a while. I've been concentrating on profiles and messaging people. I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. They say patience is a vertue, so I'm happy to keep trying to make a connection on here. Anyhow, I hope you are all having better luck than me on here. Best wishes. " The ratio of wowan to man here is one woman to 500 men. Do the maths its nearly impossible because the power of choice is in the hands of women here than the men who do the chasing😄your only luck is getting yourself to the clubs. Good luck mate | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"From a personal perspective as a single fella turning up alone at a club can be intimidating especially if you have confidence/social anxiety issues. It's also (I've found) quite difficult to get in when many clubs and socials limit the number of single fellas (I understand and appreciate why but it doesn't alleviate the issue of getting an in person verification). Factor in time constraints due to other demands (work/family/volunteering) and it becomes an almost insurmountable problem. For me small intimate dinner/social gatherings work best but without building the contacts they won't happen, it's a bit chicken and egg really. I don't have a solution it's just an observation, some folks a naturally gregarious in parties others not - that's life.
Swinging is hobby. If you were allergic to bee stings would you take up beekeeping? Can't swim/take up waterskiing?
And like any hobby if you want to partake you make the time.
It's horses for courses. Swinging isn't for everybody and if you haven't the confidence or the social skills then maybe you need a different hobby.
Sorry but that's not a very inclusive comment and tends to promote clique. So you're saying that someone who enjoys this lifestyle but finds large groups difficult shouldn't be involved I find insulting.
"What I'm, saying is if you have a hobby that is based on social interaction you need to be sociable. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"From a personal perspective as a single fella turning up alone at a club can be intimidating especially if you have confidence/social anxiety issues. It's also (I've found) quite difficult to get in when many clubs and socials limit the number of single fellas (I understand and appreciate why but it doesn't alleviate the issue of getting an in person verification). Factor in time constraints due to other demands (work/family/volunteering) and it becomes an almost insurmountable problem. For me small intimate dinner/social gatherings work best but without building the contacts they won't happen, it's a bit chicken and egg really. I don't have a solution it's just an observation, some folks a naturally gregarious in parties others not - that's life.
Swinging is hobby. If you were allergic to bee stings would you take up beekeeping? Can't swim/take up waterskiing?
And like any hobby if you want to partake you make the time.
It's horses for courses. Swinging isn't for everybody and if you haven't the confidence or the social skills then maybe you need a different hobby.
Sorry but that's not a very inclusive comment and tends to promote clique. So you're saying that someone who enjoys this lifestyle but finds large groups difficult shouldn't be involved I find insulting.
"Ooopsie! They don’t like the term ‘clique’ mate! Use ‘EGOF’ instead (Established Group Of Friends), much more palatable | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I feel sorry for men on here. Woman definitely have the pick. I think there is 1 man to every woman on here. I'm not sure if clubs are the answer as you maybe stick out like a sore thumb if you were on your own. Just keep the faith and I hope things improve for you in the very near future . Take care x" Thank you xx | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Hey mate. Straight male here. Been back on here for nearly two weeks and had socials and a meet. Another social Saturday and two different meets next week. Make your messages interesting and show your personality. Make a point of reading there profile and don’t cut and paste x" Hi mate, I'm happy you are having success on here. I never copy and paste and always read profiles twice before messaging anyone. Maybe it's my dry old school sense of humour and being a blunt Yorkshireman that's the problem. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"When we first saw one of the OP's posts we couldn't understand why he was struggling. His photos were good, his sense of humour came over in his profile, he was obviously actually single, could accommodate and even has a hot tub ffs. He ticked virtually every box except for location! Then as time went on we realised why, it's his attitude. Dave you need to get over this stubborn refusal to move outside your comfort zone. Clubs and socials may not be for you but unless you try them you will never know. Yes some men post on here that they were ignored, clubs are clicquey etc. but they are in the minority, it's selective reading on your part. " Thanks for your reply, it's really appreciated. I know obviously women and couples have the upper hand on here, and that's only to be expected. And thank you for your positive comments about my profile - it means a lot. Everyone is different, and everyone has their own approach, and some people will prefer clubs and organised socials, and others arnt interested in that approach to meeting people. I'm firmly in the second camp. I'm happy that you think my profile is positive, that means a lot to me, thank you. Hopefully one day my luck will change on here and I will get a positive reply to a message. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Although I'm on here every day, I've not posted on the forums for a while. I've been concentrating on profiles and messaging people. I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. They say patience is a vertue, so I'm happy to keep trying to make a connection on here. Anyhow, I hope you are all having better luck than me on here. Best wishes. " I've had meets, and some great fun. But I've been on (and off lol) Fab for a few years and it ain't what it used to be for sure   | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" Everyone is different, and everyone has their own approach, and some people will prefer clubs and organised socials, and others arnt interested in that approach to meeting people. I'm firmly in the second camp. " Many people on here will only meet in a club due to the large number of no shows. Wouldn't you even go to a club in that situation? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" Everyone is different, and everyone has their own approach, and some people will prefer clubs and organised socials, and others arnt interested in that approach to meeting people. I'm firmly in the second camp. Many people on here will only meet in a club due to the large number of no shows. Wouldn't you even go to a club in that situation?" Thanks for your reply. Clubs arnt for me. A lot of women and couples say single guys must be able to accommodate, which I can, as I am genuinely single, so being a no show dosnt really applie. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"There is a new club in Sheffield called Steel Cliffe which would be convenient for you OP" Thanks for your reply, but I'm not interested in going to a club. I'm hoping to meet someone for a private social for a coffee rather than a group meet. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" A lot of women and couples say single guys must be able to accommodate, which I can, as I am genuinely single, so being a no show dosnt really applie. " Have you considered that a lot of single women don't feel comfortable going to a man's house alone and feel safer meeting in a club. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" Everyone is different, and everyone has their own approach, and some people will prefer clubs and organised socials, and others arnt interested in that approach to meeting people. I'm firmly in the second camp. Many people on here will only meet in a club due to the large number of no shows. Wouldn't you even go to a club in that situation? Thanks for your reply. Clubs arnt for me. A lot of women and couples say single guys must be able to accommodate, which I can, as I am genuinely single, so being a no show dosnt really applie. " It does apply as people say all sorts of things on here but that doesn't mean it's true. Lots of stories of people being sent to the wrong house, for example. It would seem that there's only one way you will meet OP and that's your way. You may be lucky and find that elusive compatible person but you are definitely making it harder for yourself. Good luck. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" ... Ooopsie! They don’t like the term ‘clique’ mate! Use ‘EGOF’ instead (Established Group Of Friends), much more palatable "Sounds more like a UK airfield! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"There is a new club in Sheffield called Steel Cliffe which would be convenient for you OP Thanks for your reply, but I'm not interested in going to a club. I'm hoping to meet someone for a private social for a coffee rather than a group meet. " You could meet someone socially at a bar in a club, then if you like go off to a private room. When I was on as a single woman , I'd have never have met a single guy outside of a club environment | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. " Thought we were having our first meet in a while last night but sadly they were a no-show , most chats lead nowhere (fakes and pic collectors), we're ghosted or they leave site | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. Thought we were having our first meet in a while last night but sadly they were a no-show , most chats lead nowhere (fakes and pic collectors), we're ghosted or they leave site "Ridiculous! I can never understand it for the life of me. People who do that miss out massively! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"It’s hard at the best of times, but OP is also playing the fab game on hard mode too. From my single lady’s perspective, being able to accommodate is useful for further down the line, but there’s no way I’m going to anyone’s house, single male, female or couple, without getting to know them first. I’m still confused as to why OP is so set on using Fab at all - swinging is so much about the social lifestyle, which is not of interest. Surely the dating apps would yield better results. " Agree sadly. Not the most clear path to bemoan what's not working, but insist on continuing in the same vein. 🤷♂️ Having changed tack myself (not messaging any more, nor relying on Fab for anything but information about what's going on) and getting onto social chat groups, then heading to physical socials, then finally clubs absolutely worked for me. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"It’s difficult. We haven’t had a couples play meet in at least two years. We could get guys on Fab but until recently had a regular guy so weren’t looking. Been to a club locally but a lot of people seemed to know each other so found it difficult to get chatting. Went to PDI and Comeback bar but lots of people sitting around with their partners or friends they’d brought. Didn’t seem like the place you could approach people and there weren’t really couples we both fancied. So Fab is extremely tough but we’ve had little success elsewhere. It’s not just you OP." Thank you for your reply, it's appreciated. I knew the day I joined FAB three years ago that I was in the majority and looking for someone in the minority. That's fine and I accepted that. I'm not against meeting for a social meet and a chat to see if there is a connection, but I would rather meet in public for a one on one social for a drink, rather than engage in a game of swinging speed dating at an organised large social. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"It’s hard at the best of times, but OP is also playing the fab game on hard mode too. From my single lady’s perspective, being able to accommodate is useful for further down the line, but there’s no way I’m going to anyone’s house, single male, female or couple, without getting to know them first. I’m still confused as to why OP is so set on using Fab at all - swinging is so much about the social lifestyle, which is not of interest. Surely the dating apps would yield better results. " Thank you for your reply. I would never expect anyone to come to my house for a first meet. I would love to meet for a one on one social in public for a chat to see if there is a connection. Even hapoy to have a few public one on one social meets. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"It’s hard at the best of times, but OP is also playing the fab game on hard mode too. From my single lady’s perspective, being able to accommodate is useful for further down the line, but there’s no way I’m going to anyone’s house, single male, female or couple, without getting to know them first. I’m still confused as to why OP is so set on using Fab at all - swinging is so much about the social lifestyle, which is not of interest. Surely the dating apps would yield better results. Thank you for your reply. I would never expect anyone to come to my house for a first meet. I would love to meet for a one on one social in public for a chat to see if there is a connection. Even hapoy to have a few public one on one social meets. " I get that, you’ve been very clear about that. But don’t forget that a lot of women will prefer that ‘first intimacy’ for want of a better phrase, happens in a club environment. Not necessarily in public, but so that there are people around if things go wrong. I’ve been SA’d at a private meet after meeting the guy socially a couple of times; if that had happened at a club it would have been dealt with a lot better and I might have saved myself a year of therapy. Every guy thinks they’re a good guy, but from the woman’s perspective it’s impossible to tell. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"My luck has been amazing on here, I’ve made lifelong friends,met a fantastic lady who is my soulmate and had experiences I never dreamed I’d have. Long may it continue "Love that! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
if I fell into a barrel of tits I'd climb out sucking my thumb | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"My luck has been amazing on here, I’ve made lifelong friends,met a fantastic lady who is my soulmate and had experiences I never dreamed I’d have. Long may it continue "it was your verifications that made me curious.. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"OP is only saying about one to one meets, despite many threads and many times him saying club's aren't his thing people are still going on about clubs. One to one meets are perfectly acceptable if it comes from a woman's profile...why is the OP any different "I would say it's because he keeps going on and on (and on and on) starting the same thread repeatedly when he has been advised of a way to break the deadlock. He refuses to do what is advised, for whatever reason, and just seems to want a different answer. Tedious? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Tried clubs twice. It was an absolute waste of time and money on both occasions. There's a 70% chance you'll just end up talking to yourself." I wish I'd stopped at two.... | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"OP is only saying about one to one meets, despite many threads and many times him saying club's aren't his thing people are still going on about clubs." That's probably because one doesn't necessarily have to play at a club. The OP could, potentially, widen his network and meet new people for a drink at a club who would/could be amenable to meeting for one-to-one at a later date, in private. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"OP is only saying about one to one meets, despite many threads and many times him saying club's aren't his thing people are still going on about clubs. That's probably because one doesn't necessarily have to play at a club. The OP could, potentially, widen his network and meet new people for a drink at a club who would/could be amenable to meeting for one-to-one at a later date, in private." this is very true.. pretty much anyone I've ever met privately, I've met socially in clubs first | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"OP is only saying about one to one meets, despite many threads and many times him saying club's aren't his thing people are still going on about clubs. That's probably because one doesn't necessarily have to play at a club. The OP could, potentially, widen his network and meet new people for a drink at a club who would/could be amenable to meeting for one-to-one at a later date, in private." Exactly this! Which is the point so many people have tried to emphasise, yet the OP chooses to selectively ignore these and come back to the forum posting the same threads over and over again asking if anyone else is having “luck” and the like… | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility….. Clubs are for couples, leave them to it
One thing id say about club nights is they aren't all created equally, id say some are better for single men than others. GreedyGirl or hotwife nights would be a good bet. Single guys we’ve seen have success talk to people, arent creepy, don't follow couples around staring etc.. ask qualifying questions, what are you looking for? etc
Agreed!
I've found 'Dangerous Curves' at Libs to be one of the best, along with 'Curvaceous Creatures' at Purple Mamba IF a single guy is capable of making genuine, friendly conversation as in any other social situation.
Letting people make their minds up about us as a human being first goes a long way, along with avoiding any sexual conversation, other than smiling, eye contact and light flirting IF things are already going well.
Be an attractive proposition as a person first and foremost (which has very little to do with looks!) and allow people to get to know you organically.
Being creepy, wandering constantly and not engaging socially is likely to get you a stiff ignoring to - and comes across as creepy. If you can't make a woman feel safe and comfortable in your company you need to go away and have a look at yourself in the mirror.
All of the above has been very successful for me - naturally and without 'effort'. Just being your authentic self as you would be in any social setting. Also remember women aren't pieces of meat just because it's a club setting.
"Well said | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" I’ve visited 8 clubs, to a total of 19 visits, and can honestly say, that in no other avenue of my life, have I ever felt like Harry Potter wearing his cloak of invisibility….. Clubs are for couples, leave them to it
One thing id say about club nights is they aren't all created equally, id say some are better for single men than others. GreedyGirl or hotwife nights would be a good bet. Single guys we’ve seen have success talk to people, arent creepy, don't follow couples around staring etc.. ask qualifying questions, what are you looking for? etc
Agreed!
I've found 'Dangerous Curves' at Libs to be one of the best, along with 'Curvaceous Creatures' at Purple Mamba IF a single guy is capable of making genuine, friendly conversation as in any other social situation.
Letting people make their minds up about us as a human being first goes a long way, along with avoiding any sexual conversation, other than smiling, eye contact and light flirting IF things are already going well.
Be an attractive proposition as a person first and foremost (which has very little to do with looks!) and allow people to get to know you organically.
Being creepy, wandering constantly and not engaging socially is likely to get you a stiff ignoring to - and comes across as creepy. If you can't make a woman feel safe and comfortable in your company you need to go away and have a look at yourself in the mirror.
All of the above has been very successful for me - naturally and without 'effort'. Just being your authentic self as you would be in any social setting. Also remember women aren't pieces of meat just because it's a club setting.
Well said "The downside is that 'roles' are reversed on here - men ARE looked upon as pieces of meat I suspect. So many in stock, some of which have already gone off and nowhere near the custom waiting. Add to that the fact that every woman can choose fillet steak every day of the week and it stands to reason that most meat is going to rot away while waiting to be bought, irrespective of quality. As for the fillet steak, some of it won't be what it appears to be, or sells itself as. There's also a proportion of it that states itself on the label to be M&S fillet steak, whether it actually is or not. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Lots of folk saying go to clubs ! That's ok if you want in the same room as abusers & wrong yins 😡" are you saying swingers are abusers? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Lots of folk saying go to clubs ! That's ok if you want in the same room as abusers & wrong yins 😡" That’s a very bold statement to make. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Lots of folk saying go to clubs ! That's ok if you want in the same room as abusers & wrong yins 😡" What club are you going to?? Sounds like my kinda place 😁 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
I do think some couples expect you to stop what you are doing and be ready for when they want without any inkling of your real life. Clearly we need to understand the FAB way but do find it a little off putting .We are even wondering if we are not others couples cup of tea for some reason | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"It's in Glasgow, I Don't go "Oh that explains it! 😂😂😂😂 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
Fill your boots | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I think we can relate to the op post here, we have been on the site a year but only actively for the last month or so. We have had one social meet so far but have found messaging really hit or miss, miss mostly. We will receive a message reply with something honest and simple for example "we can't make the 5th but could do the 10th ?" and then radio silence,we have even wondered if our message function wasn't working
I do think some couples expect you to stop what you are doing and be ready for when they want without any inkling of your real life. Clearly we need to understand the FAB way but do find it a little off putting .We are even wondering if we are not others couples cup of tea for some reason "Perhaps some representation of both of you in your photos might help. I know if I get messages from couples and there's only one of them in their photos (and where both want to be involved of course) it's a straight delete. I'm not alone in this. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Lots of folk saying go to clubs ! That's ok if you want in the same room as abusers & wrong yins 😡" You’ll find more wronguns not in clubs as all clubs require passport / driving license ID to join pretty much | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I know for sure 👍 On the other hand women hold all the Aces on here ! You can be chatting away & then Someone else better looking or bigger cock shows interest & your dumped 🤷♂️" That’s just life. Play the game or don’t and find a new interest | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I know for sure 👍 On the other hand women hold all the Aces on here ! You can be chatting away & then Someone else better looking or bigger cock shows interest & your dumped 🤷♂️" Wouldn’t say that’s very true it depends on what the person is like if I was on here purely for cock size I would just go buy a massive plastic one | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Aye ok sir/miss whatever it is "lol
Kiss | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Honestly I think I may call it a day soon, just don’t know what else to do " You have been on here 12 weeks It’s not instafuck on sites like this as a single guy . Just look at involving in some social meets and go from that. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have the same success rate as OP, zero. I've been here on and off over the last 3 years. In that time I've emailed one couple without a reply." In three years you've only sent one message? "...and wasn't prepared to blanket email 50 women or couples to increase my chances. I just put some pics up and if someone shows interest great, if not its as I expected." I think perhaps you need to augment your approach: it's not about sending a blanket email to all and sundry, but instead message those that you genuinely find interesting and those with whom you wish to engage. Photographs are there to complement your bio, to add some mystique to your profile and showcase your personality. They don't necessarily serve as an impetus for others to speculatively message you. "The ratio is also way off, for every 100 guys there is probably only 1 women (ratio may be a lot more guys than that). Then you factor in those who won't meet single guys, you have to be 6' tall etc, no beards, you must host etc. Then your chances decrease even further. " This is just pointless diatribe and you're being a defeatist. You need to focus on those who wish to "meet single guys". Height has no bearing. Beards have no relevance. Hosting is an option and not mandatory. Look for opportunities and not excuses. "I do prefer the forums than what the site is actually for." The fora is a wonderful platform to increase your awareness and your 'good citizenship'. "The whole dynamic of Fab is odd, I think it destroys guys confidence and increases womens & couples." Yes, I agree. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Although I'm on here every day, I've not posted on the forums for a while. I've been concentrating on profiles and messaging people. I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. They say patience is a vertue, so I'm happy to keep trying to make a connection on here. Anyhow, I hope you are all having better luck than me on here. Best wishes. " Not bragging or anything but I'm doing pretty well. It was slow at first but after I got verified and uploaded content and interacted with the community (forum) it's been great fun. I have been on here for a while now so i guess that's another reason for my success if you wanna call it that. I also am willing to travel and accommodate. Good luck mate and stay positive | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"BBC Your sorted 😀" I'm not everyone's cuppa tea and I do get the odd no replies but it doesn't stop me from trying. I don't let it get me down nor has it made me lose confidence. I just keep on going. It's a fun ! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have the same success rate as OP, zero. I've been here on and off over the last 3 years. In that time I've emailed one couple without a reply. In three years you've only sent one message? ...and wasn't prepared to blanket email 50 women or couples to increase my chances. I just put some pics up and if someone shows interest great, if not its as I expected. I think perhaps you need to augment your approach: it's not about sending a blanket email to all and sundry, but instead message those that you genuinely find interesting and those with whom you wish to engage. Photographs are there to complement your bio, to add some mystique to your profile and showcase your personality. They don't necessarily serve as an impetus for others to speculatively message you. The ratio is also way off, for every 100 guys there is probably only 1 women (ratio may be a lot more guys than that). Then you factor in those who won't meet single guys, you have to be 6' tall etc, no beards, you must host etc. Then your chances decrease even further. This is just pointless diatribe and you're being a defeatist. You need to focus on those who wish to "meet single guys". Height has no bearing. Beards have no relevance. Hosting is an option and not mandatory. Look for opportunities and not excuses. I do prefer the forums than what the site is actually for. The fora is a wonderful platform to increase your awareness and your 'good citizenship'. The whole dynamic of Fab is odd, I think it destroys guys confidence and increases womens & couples. Yes, I agree." In many cases definitely. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have the same success rate as OP, zero. I've been here on and off over the last 3 years. In that time I've emailed one couple without a reply. I didn't really expect any success to be honest as I don't get any success in the real world either. I'm just average looking and wasn't prepared to blanket email 50 women or couples to increase my chances. I just put some pics up and if someone shows interest great, if not its as I expected. The ratio is also way off, for every 100 guys there is probably only 1 women (ratio may be a lot more guys than that). Then you factor in those who won't meet single guys, you have to be 6' tall etc, no beards, you must host etc. Then your chances decrease even further. I do prefer the forums than what the site is actually for. The whole dynamic of Fab is odd, I think it destroys guys confidence and increases womens & couples. " It is an often repeated trope that Fab increases women’s confidence and gives them a false sense of their attractiveness. It is borderline misogyny as it assumes women are too stupid to be already aware that getting men to have sex with them really isn’t that difficult. Most women have had a lifetime of fighting off unwanted sexual attention from men. As for couples, yes if we were looking for single men we would probably be overwhelmed with offers, but that’s not going to encourage us to audition for the next season of Love Island. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"BBC Your sorted 😀" Not necessarily. Apart from the obvious-it not being for everyone, you still need to be able to be what that particular couple/woman wants as well as being clean, punctual, clear communicator, and so on-just like non “bbc”. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Too many idiotic messages from men. If you don't message them back, they start saying your rude or get abusive. " Accurate | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" The whole dynamic of Fab is odd, I think it destroys guys confidence and increases women's & couples. Yes, I agree. In many cases definitely. " If single guys only use Fab as a way to find sexual partners, most will become disheartened at some point. The ratios are way off, and the few single ladies in here have heard it all before. There's very little trust or respect for single guys out there, and even less face to face in a club situation (in my experience). I think the larger, group socials are the best way for a new, single guy to get himself known in this scene, but they are pretty pointless if you don't have one locally, other than getting your profile in here verified. The reality is; you will find more single ladies out there, in real life, than you will in Fab, and they will have none of the preconceptions or wariness surrounding single guys in here..... | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" The whole dynamic of Fab is odd, I think it destroys guys confidence and increases women's & couples. Yes, I agree. In many cases definitely. If single guys only use Fab as a way to find sexual partners, most will become disheartened at some point. The ratios are way off, and the few single ladies in here have heard it all before. There's very little trust or respect for single guys out there, and even less face to face in a club situation (in my experience). I think the larger, group socials are the best way for a new, single guy to get himself known in this scene, but they are pretty pointless if you don't have one locally, other than getting your profile in here verified. The reality is; you will find more single ladies out there, in real life, than you will in Fab, and they will have none of the preconceptions or wariness surrounding single guys in here..... "👏👏👏👏👏 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have had no luck whatsoever. I have messaged people and couples and been very polite in the messages. Not being a perv or ignorant in them and they ether get deleted or no response. It's very off putting and I find it very clicky. " • I'm sorry to hear this. However, your lack of success is extraneous to any cliques. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have had no luck whatsoever. I have messaged people and couples and been very polite in the messages. Not being a perv or ignorant in them and they ether get deleted or no response. It's very off putting and I find it very clicky. " You’re pretty hot, but I’d not reply on purely your choking picture & your daddy t-shirt, as we wouldn’t be compatible purely on those fleeting insights. If I saw you at a club however, without seeing your profile, I’d approach you | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" If you feel you need to pay to meet people, then I think you are lonely and should just go out and meet people the old fashion way." Do you also think that a date in a restaurant, pub or going bowling is also paying to meet people ? | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have had no luck whatsoever. I have messaged people and couples and been very polite in the messages. Not being a perv or ignorant in them and they ether get deleted or no response. It's very off putting and I find it very clicky. You’re pretty hot, but I’d not reply on purely your choking picture & your daddy t-shirt, as we wouldn’t be compatible purely on those fleeting insights. If I saw you at a club however, without seeing your profile, I’d approach you" A t-shirt and one pic would prevent you from meeting someone you may have a fantastic time with | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" If you feel you need to pay to meet people, then I think you are lonely and should just go out and meet people the old fashion way. Do you also think that a date in a restaurant, pub or going bowling is also paying to meet people ?" FAB is not a dating site | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" FAB is not a dating site " I agree but I think the only way to have a Fab meet without paying anything is in someone's home, dogging or possibly behind the bins at Asda. Even dogging you pay for petrol. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"I have had no luck whatsoever. I have messaged people and couples and been very polite in the messages. Not being a perv or ignorant in them and they ether get deleted or no response. It's very off putting and I find it very clicky. You’re pretty hot, but I’d not reply on purely your choking picture & your daddy t-shirt, as we wouldn’t be compatible purely on those fleeting insights. If I saw you at a club however, without seeing your profile, I’d approach you A t-shirt and one pic would prevent you from meeting someone you may have a fantastic time with "I wouldn’t want somebody to move their goal posts for me, as I’m not particularly looking for 1 offs, I’m seeking a regular | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" If you feel you need to pay to meet people, then I think you are lonely and should just go out and meet people the old fashion way. Do you also think that a date in a restaurant, pub or going bowling is also paying to meet people ? · FAB is not a dating site " • It is for some people. 😇 | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Although I'm on here every day, I've not posted on the forums for a while. I've been concentrating on profiles and messaging people. I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. They say patience is a vertue, so I'm happy to keep trying to make a connection on here. Anyhow, I hope you are all having better luck than me on here. Best wishes. " Rubbish !, so many fakes, fantasists, timewasters and liars on here now (to an extent in clubs too). Had a no show a week ago after getting ready and driving for an hour. Last one we spoke with suddenly left site mid chat. A month ago discovered a 'single girl' using nicked photos. Tiring to say the least ! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
"Although I'm on here every day, I've not posted on the forums for a while. I've been concentrating on profiles and messaging people. I was just wondering if people are having any actual meets from Fabswingers and meeting others, be that jyst for a social coffee or for actual fun. I'm just curious to find if others are having any success on here. I'm approaching Three years on here, and unfortunately havnt even been lucky enough to even have had a social meet for a drink. They say patience is a vertue, so I'm happy to keep trying to make a connection on here. Anyhow, I hope you are all having better luck than me on here. Best wishes. Rubbish !, so many fakes, fantasists, timewasters and liars on here now (to an extent in clubs too). Had a no show a week ago after getting ready and driving for an hour. Last one we spoke with suddenly left site mid chat. A month ago discovered a 'single girl' using nicked photos. Tiring to say the least ! "....and in the process genuine people are routinely overlooked - many bot sticking around and others exploring other avenues. No wonder! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
| |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" If you feel you need to pay to meet people, then I think you are lonely and should just go out and meet people the old fashion way. Do you also think that a date in a restaurant, pub or going bowling is also paying to meet people ? FAB is not a dating site " Course it is. For those who want and those who can I want and I can | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" If you feel you need to pay to meet people, then I think you are lonely and should just go out and meet people the old fashion way. Do you also think that a date in a restaurant, pub or going bowling is also paying to meet people ? FAB is not a dating site Course it is. For those who want and those who can I want and I can "I did but do not anymore, never been to a club never will, from the why can I not meet anyone threads in the past. Single men should not bother as the comments made about single men on FAB put me right off hence hidden profile and just use the forums. But there will always be the type that will just stay and keep trying. If I am looking for action I do not need FAB to find it. | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
Fab, and especially the clubs, has ratios heavily stacked against single guys. I would never recommend the club scene to a mate, as a way of meeting women, but Fab does work for those with patience, and is completely free to use (unlike visiting a club as a single guy )
You can dip in and out of Fab at any time of day or night, as suits your ‘normal’ life. Be selective who you message; only message those profiles you feel a genuine possibility of a match with.
Respect, patience, and the understanding that this place is an extra to life, not the be-all-and-end-all. There really are more ladies out there in the real world, than in Fab! | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
" If you feel you need to pay to meet people, then I think you are lonely and should just go out and meet people the old fashion way. Do you also think that a date in a restaurant, pub or going bowling is also paying to meet people ? FAB is not a dating site Course it is. For those who want and those who can I want and I can
I did but do not anymore, never been to a club never will, from the why can I not meet anyone threads in the past.
Single men should not bother as the comments made about single men on FAB put me right off hence hidden profile and just use the forums.
But there will always be the type that will just stay and keep trying.
If I am looking for action I do not need FAB to find it."Sorry to hear about your negative experience. Mine has been quite different . I hope things improve for you | |||
Reply privately (closed, thread got too big) | |||
