Always let the other know who they're chatting to if there's a chance of a meet..
Don't hide anything or meet someone if they don't want you to.
Don't allow others to try and cause drama, i'll happily confirm Jack meets alone, but then that's me out of it. I had a woman who kept messaging me trying to involve me, I blocked her and in the end so did my partner.
Play safe.
Keep communicating, that's about it. We can both meet seperately & my other half has had a few solo meets with my blessing. |
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We never set each other rules, however we had a couple of rules that we agreed together:
Don't do things without the others awareness and blessing
Don't do things that makes the other uncomfortable
Always consider the feelings of the other
Always respect the boundaries of the other |
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"Surely the point of sexual freedom within a marriage/relationship is that there are no rules, or at least none set by the other. K."
That might be the point for you, but how can you state that must be the point for everyone?
For us, the freedom to have sex with other women is a 'gift' I give him. Therefore I get to set parameters and he willingly abides by them. If he did anything that made me unhappy it would make him unhappy too and ruin the whole experience. If I ever have sex with anyone else on my own he absolutely has rules for me, but that's partly about our D/s dynamic. |
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"What rules do you set each other when playing separately? And is it different for each of you.
"
I'm on here with my wife. Yes we have rules and yes, they are different....but that's our dynamic and its been that way for 27 years now.
If we play as a couple then we have playing as a couple rules.
But outside.of thay we errr more towards a cuckqean / hot husband dynamic and my wife really only wants to play with other women anyway.
So she's free to meet and play with other women which usually is at our club anyway.
I'm basically free to do whatever I want, when I want. Can talk, flirt or get into bed with any lady I like.
Due to my own ethics, I always tell her before I meet anyone and she could, if she so wished, veto it (and I wouldn't argue with it) but she never has in 27 years. She actively gets a big kick out it. She'd love me to go out one night, without her knowledge, pull someone, have my wicked way with them and then come home and tell her about it.
Never actually done that though. She always knows when im going to our local swingers club or on a meet (because she gets invited to join more often than not) and because I don't feel like fishing in pubs or bars or leading someone on.
Maybe one day I'll.meet a random fellow swinger randomly.in the supermarket and ill have a sexy surprise for her but to date, she's always known when I'm out playing away before hand. |
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I am in an open relationship, and we only see each other at the weekends, we are as good as single during the week. When we're together, the preference is to play together, with one of us at least watching if they can't or don't want to get fully involved. Example here- I like bi men but my partner is fully straight. He would still be in the room, either just watching, making sure I am safe and comfortable (though I am confident enough to stop play if needed) or he teases me with our gloves, pinwheel or flogger. Or, better still, gets involved with a lady if it's a couple with a bi male  . We do have an agreement that, if at any point either of us would like to go have some solo play with someone who took our fancy, we can as long as the other one knows and is happy about that.
During the week, we both have freedom to meet as singles. He is friends with both my regulars, and knows when I go to a club with my FWB. He knows I am not the sort of person who would tell him all the details afterwards, but he knows I'm safe with my FWB. He is struggling to find someone regular to meet during the week ("curse" of single guy on Fab), but the rules are the same for both of us whether we're meeting together or as single: stay safe and communicate. |
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By *oxy jWoman 13 weeks ago
somerset |
theres a line in the sand for a reason..
30++ years on this scene and our rules still apply ... its what we both want at all time we are more important than anybody even as a cuckold couple where i rule his sexual desires as my cuck if hes not happy then im not happy the good thing is we are both very open minded and totally on the same page ... you both need to be on that same page if not then cracks will appear ... swingers are strong relationship wise if your not then this scene will break you ..
our rule apply across the board so online / clubs / private party / dogging always same rules both if one wants and the other dont then its off the table end of |
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"You may have trust.. but you won't ever know for sure."
trust needs to be 100% in this....
To be fair we have decided that we won't be playing separately. Mr would be fine with me doing so... but I don't like it at all...
The rules we did have were different for playing separately... |
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