FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Advice for getting meets?
Advice for getting meets?
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks |
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
Clubs and socials, lower your expectations so not to disappointed with no meets and I guess compare your profile to the successful ones on here.
Patience and putting the best version of you on your profile forward for the ladies to be able to decide if they want to know more
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Hi OP.
I suspect that your lack of sexual experience makes this a particularly difficult place for you. It's not easy at the best of times.
As you're a student, I reccomend that you get out and meet fellow students, join clubs or group, have fun and explore life a bit.
Nita |
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By *an1978Woman 51 weeks ago
GONE/TIMEOUT (No DMs please) |
Ah bless you it is hard to get started, great that you're looking to attend a social.
Your profile is clear and honest, and your photos better than most profiles.
So once you break your duck and get a few in person veris you'll do fine xx |
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It takes time but your profile is far better than many we have seen. Good on you for looking at a social, great place to meet people and get to know others in the scene.
If you’re feeling really brave then attend a club, even if just to get a sense of what goes on. V&K x |
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By *oxy jWoman 51 weeks ago
somerset |
put in a blunt way but very honest way if nobody is interested then theres nothing you can really do except waits and see if anyone becomes interested..
the truth is its a very very hard scene for most men you out number women and couples 100 to one often more depending on where you live so this alone is why so many will never get a meet.. in numbers or percentages very few men make it on this scene...
add in that you state your a virgin is going to make it very very slim indeed most swingers are looking for great sex and kinks .... sorry to be so blunt but more guys need to know the harsh reality of this scene as a whole ...
clubs and social get together are your best bet to get your feet on the ladder but even then it will be very very hard .... just because your a man ...
good luck  |
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By *samCouple 51 weeks ago
Cambridge |
OP I thought your profile read well. Honest and genuine.
Sex can be funny awkward and amazing but a good connection with your partner will see you well through all that and help you find your way. Don’t be afraid to ask what partners enjoy and want before sex too.
Best of luck and happy fabbing! Xx |
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If you were local, the Mrs would almost certainly meet you. There's nothing negative or bad about your profile. Although I suspect a lot of women would hesitate due to your experience, some women definitely find that a positive  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks
Clubs and socials, lower your expectations so not to disappointed with no meets and I guess compare your profile to the successful ones on here.
Patience and putting the best version of you on your profile forward for the ladies to be able to decide if they want to know more
"
I’ll keep that in mind when I go so if I do meet someone I’ll be pleasantly surprised. Thank you
That’s what I’ve been trying to do
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Hi OP.
I suspect that your lack of sexual experience makes this a particularly difficult place for you. It's not easy at the best of times.
As you're a student, I reccomend that you get out and meet fellow students, join clubs or group, have fun and explore life a bit.
Nita "
I understand that but that’s why I’m honest about it because I don’t went to lie
I’ve been trying to join socials and events but a lot seem to have died off tbh  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Ah bless you it is hard to get started, great that you're looking to attend a social.
Your profile is clear and honest, and your photos better than most profiles.
So once you break your duck and get a few in person veris you'll do fine xx"
It’s not easy
Thank you. That means a lot. I’m glad my profile isn’t the problem
Yeah I’d like some more person meets. Seems to be a struggle getting them |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"put in a blunt way but very honest way if nobody is interested then theres nothing you can really do except waits and see if anyone becomes interested..
the truth is its a very very hard scene for most men you out number women and couples 100 to one often more depending on where you live so this alone is why so many will never get a meet.. in numbers or percentages very few men make it on this scene...
add in that you state your a virgin is going to make it very very slim indeed most swingers are looking for great sex and kinks .... sorry to be so blunt but more guys need to know the harsh reality of this scene as a whole ...
clubs and social get together are your best bet to get your feet on the ladder but even then it will be very very hard .... just because your a man ...
good luck "
Well, hasn’t gone well so far tbh
Yeah it’s not as populated as London but I expected someone.
There’s kinks I’d like to try and like to get good at sex. Just getting there. I appreciate your honestly
Well, I’ll try and do a social and put the best version of me forward
Thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"OP I thought your profile read well. Honest and genuine.
Sex can be funny awkward and amazing but a good connection with your partner will see you well through all that and help you find your way. Don’t be afraid to ask what partners enjoy and want before sex too.
Best of luck and happy fabbing! Xx"
Thank you. That means a lot. I tried to show
I’d like that 
Will do because I want my partner to enjoy it just as much as I would and doing what makes them feel good.
Thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"If you were local, the Mrs would almost certainly meet you. There's nothing negative or bad about your profile. Although I suspect a lot of women would hesitate due to your experience, some women definitely find that a positive "
Id like that. I’m glad it's not my profile. Yeah, you’re right. I’d love to meet one who does  |
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
When you ask for advice, you have to be careful the advice you get is the type you want.
We are a couple that would happily meet a man of your age, but for a few things. Please be aware that this is a personal opinion, not a personal attack; you asked, so we'll tell you....
From our perspective, there are three things that stand out.
Firstly, your pics are good. There's humour for a start, showing you have a fun side. There's a range of pictures, both clothed and unclothed. You're showing a little bit about you and what you want, but your not showing fifteen cock pics. Believe us when we say that there are a lot of men that could do with looking at your self-effacing photo's and try to match them.
Two. You have been verified by a man, a woman, a cpl and a TV/TS. yet your profile say you are looking to meet F or MF only. Our (I would underline that word if I could) problem is not that you have been verified by a man or TV/TS, but that you choose to hide the verification. If you haven't heard of the term Fab straight, maybe now is the time to learn of it, because your verifications would cause us to think you might not be what you say. Put simply - If your verifications are genuine let us all see them so we can see if you are the person you purport to be.
Three. Your profile says you are a virgin. No problem, we all were once; no judgment here. But your profile name and the fact you are looking for a regular also allude to you looking for a long term relationship. Whilst the world is full of anomolies, I think it hard to calculate the chances of a virgin finding a long term relationship on a swingers website.
Please don't read this and hide the person you are, it is merely our opinion.
Good luck
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By (user no longer on site) 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
Hide your verification summary.
 |
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
Try a guy! |
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Being totally honest OP, a virgin who’s ‘addicted to love’ is unlikely to be what most people here are looking for.
Your first sexual experience can come with all kinds emotions, and there’s a strong chance it could be a one off if you find it through Fab. That’s not an ideal scenario.
I’d suggest, like the person above, you get out amongst the students and see what naturally occurs there. Fab is a tricky place even for the most experienced of us. |
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As a fab veteran(been here 7 years) I’ve had 3 meets through fab and they were spread out over years. Most of my meets/verifications came from clubs and socials. It’s a process and you have to try to keep positive and respectful. Socials are definitely the way forward. |
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By (user no longer on site) 51 weeks ago
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Your profile header says you're looking for your first meet, but you have verifications so make sure that your header is still accurate.
Either hide your verification summary or show all of your verifications, because right now the people who have verified you are at odds with what your profile says you are looking for, and this will be a red flag to some people, who may think you are concealing some aspects of your life to appear more appealing.
Apart from that, just be patient, do as others have suggested and try some clubs or events if you can, just be courteous and respectful and you'll be fine! Your profile is better than a lot on here, it says what you want and isn't a sea of dick pics so you're already off to a good start, it just needs some minor adjustments. |
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"Your profile header says you're looking for your first meet, but you have verifications so make sure that your header is still accurate.
Either hide your verification summary or show all of your verifications, because right now the people who have verified you are at odds with what your profile says you are looking for, and this will be a red flag to some people, who may think you are concealing some aspects of your life to appear more appealing.
Apart from that, just be patient, do as others have suggested and try some clubs or events if you can, just be courteous and respectful and you'll be fine! Your profile is better than a lot on here, it says what you want and isn't a sea of dick pics so you're already off to a good start, it just needs some minor adjustments."
Summary clearly shows they are all webcam? |
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By (user no longer on site) 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
Tbh if you're living in university halls then that is by far a better option than fab.I appreciate you might be masters students which is different to first years haha
Still the options at university are far more plentiful at uni. Have you refrained from doing anything at uni out of embarrassment of saying you're a virgin? |
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If you’re a male then you’re really up against it. Took me over a year to get my first female meet but definitely worth it. Most women , from what I’ve gleaned, are totally inundated with messages. This no doubt accounts for ignored or deleted messages and the aloof attitude of some women. They’re in the driving seat and you have to somehow try and stand out. Not easy |
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Best advice I can give is to just be you be honest open and willing your profile is decent certainly better then most just keep on trying really dude it's just trial and error I'm not the most attractive guy and my profile isn't the greatest but hard work and time has paid off on occasion good luck buddy |
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
Go to socials, but when there don’t stand in the corner with your drink.
You need to engage with people. Talk to them, and I don’t mean about sex.
People will see you for who you are and not as a desperate sex fiend.
It takes time to build yourself into a network of people.
The majority of my veris are from socials, and I am now reaping the benefit of this, but it has taken a while.
Be patient. I am now in a lucky enough position that I get referrals, so am not so reliant on fab to get meets.
This is what ultimately you want to be striving for.
I personally would stick to clothed photos only on your profile, but keep the rest as friends only.
You profile is better than most, but you are relatively young, and there are women and couple on here that probably have children the same age as you or older..
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By (user no longer on site) 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
I'd agree you want a Premises or 2 that does so you can..
But bluntly couples dont/won't meet that freely at-all, inc singles. A lot of them want paying in some term, secret mate deal, wagers, hind-the-back, chatter about days or bonkers folly
Genuinely a dire website with no actual value.
(I've never dated off here)
Dating off a handset ??!?! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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" When you ask for advice, you have to be careful the advice you get is the type you want.
We are a couple that would happily meet a man of your age, but for a few things. Please be aware that this is a personal opinion, not a personal attack; you asked, so we'll tell you....
From our perspective, there are three things that stand out.
Firstly, your pics are good. There's humour for a start, showing you have a fun side. There's a range of pictures, both clothed and unclothed. You're showing a little bit about you and what you want, but your not showing fifteen cock pics. Believe us when we say that there are a lot of men that could do with looking at your self-effacing photo's and try to match them.
Two. You have been verified by a man, a woman, a cpl and a TV/TS. yet your profile say you are looking to meet F or MF only. Our (I would underline that word if I could) problem is not that you have been verified by a man or TV/TS, but that you choose to hide the verification. If you haven't heard of the term Fab straight, maybe now is the time to learn of it, because your verifications would cause us to think you might not be what you say. Put simply - If your verifications are genuine let us all see them so we can see if you are the person you purport to be.
Three. Your profile says you are a virgin. No problem, we all were once; no judgment here. But your profile name and the fact you are looking for a regular also allude to you looking for a long term relationship. Whilst the world is full of anomolies, I think it hard to calculate the chances of a virgin finding a long term relationship on a swingers website.
Please don't read this and hide the person you are, it is merely our opinion.
Good luck
"
I realised early on that cock pics aren’t the way to go. I kept the more explicit pics for friends only and if they ask to see. Gotta have some secrets haha
Those are webcam verifications. Idk how to block guys and TV from watching me. I haven’t displayed them for that exact reason that I’m not gay or bi.
Regular as in FWB deal or someone I can meet with more than once. Not just a one night stand
I hope that answers your questions and I will try and change my profile according to your suggestions thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Hi op
Try using more of the site don't just rely on messages as you've got the meet section and chat rooms and the forums get involved "
I do use the chat rooms and I’m trying to be more active in the forums |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Your profile header says you're looking for your first meet, but you have verifications so make sure that your header is still accurate.
Either hide your verification summary or show all of your verifications, because right now the people who have verified you are at odds with what your profile says you are looking for, and this will be a red flag to some people, who may think you are concealing some aspects of your life to appear more appealing.
Apart from that, just be patient, do as others have suggested and try some clubs or events if you can, just be courteous and respectful and you'll be fine! Your profile is better than a lot on here, it says what you want and isn't a sea of dick pics so you're already off to a good start, it just needs some minor adjustments.
Summary clearly shows they are all webcam? "
Exactly. They’re all webcams because I wanted to be verified but wasn’t getting meets. I don’t get to choose who watched me as far as I can feel but I haven’t displayed them for that exact reason I’m not into guys |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Being totally honest OP, a virgin who’s ‘addicted to love’ is unlikely to be what most people here are looking for.
Your first sexual experience can come with all kinds emotions, and there’s a strong chance it could be a one off if you find it through Fab. That’s not an ideal scenario.
I’d suggest, like the person above, you get out amongst the students and see what naturally occurs there. Fab is a tricky place even for the most experienced of us. "
It’s a name of a song by Robert palmer
Hmm you make a good point there. I’m trying to join socials but haven’t had much luck |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks
Go to socials, but when there don’t stand in the corner with your drink.
You need to engage with people. Talk to them, and I don’t mean about sex.
People will see you for who you are and not as a desperate sex fiend.
It takes time to build yourself into a network of people.
The majority of my veris are from socials, and I am now reaping the benefit of this, but it has taken a while.
Be patient. I am now in a lucky enough position that I get referrals, so am not so reliant on fab to get meets.
This is what ultimately you want to be striving for.
I personally would stick to clothed photos only on your profile, but keep the rest as friends only.
You profile is better than most, but you are relatively young, and there are women and couple on here that probably have children the same age as you or older..
"
Thanks for the advice. I’ll take that onboard and talk to people at socials. Thanks I’ll continue to keep the explicit pics for friends only
Yeah I understand that everyone has a preference. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks
Tbh if you're living in university halls then that is by far a better option than fab.I appreciate you might be masters students which is different to first years haha
Still the options at university are far more plentiful at uni. Have you refrained from doing anything at uni out of embarrassment of saying you're a virgin?"
Haha first year
I haven’t meet anyone. I commuted so didn’t attend socials only moved in halls a month ago.
Haven’t gotten to that point. I don’t have anyone to go clubbing with. My course friends aren’t into that
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"Being totally honest OP, a virgin who’s ‘addicted to love’ is unlikely to be what most people here are looking for.
Your first sexual experience can come with all kinds emotions, and there’s a strong chance it could be a one off if you find it through Fab. That’s not an ideal scenario.
I’d suggest, like the person above, you get out amongst the students and see what naturally occurs there. Fab is a tricky place even for the most experienced of us.
It’s a name of a song by Robert palmer
Hmm you make a good point there. I’m trying to join socials but haven’t had much luck "
Oh I know it’s a song lyric, but that along with you being a virgin wanting a regular partner isn’t painting a very ‘casual sex’ kind of vibe |
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Most people are not mutually compatible with most other people. Keep this in mind when you get rejected.
Perhaps look for non-members days at clubs, as this could be a way to get to know others, in addition to your social plans.
Also, would defining the areas that you'd travel to help? |
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In all honesty, get off FAB.
Go to student haunts and socialise within them.
Meet people around your own age, with similar interests and aspirations, most of you are away from home and tend to congregate and let rip.
Swinging is a hard game to crack for couples too and some of the people you meet, not all, but quite a few are sexually experienced and looking for recreational sex. To someone inexperienced this can be a cold, rather daunting experience and certainly not for the fainthearted.
You may meet a lady in university, get on well, the relationship blossoms and you then drop the bombshell that you have, in your recent past, been shagging all sorts in a swingers club !!
Enjoy your student life, I had a ball, don't let rejection on a sex site cloud your view of relationships.
Get to more uni bars and meets, give FAB a bit of a miss or dip your toe in and out.
Good luck, have a great student life.
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Being totally honest OP, a virgin who’s ‘addicted to love’ is unlikely to be what most people here are looking for.
Your first sexual experience can come with all kinds emotions, and there’s a strong chance it could be a one off if you find it through Fab. That’s not an ideal scenario.
I’d suggest, like the person above, you get out amongst the students and see what naturally occurs there. Fab is a tricky place even for the most experienced of us.
It’s a name of a song by Robert palmer
Hmm you make a good point there. I’m trying to join socials but haven’t had much luck
Oh I know it’s a song lyric, but that along with you being a virgin wanting a regular partner isn’t painting a very ‘casual sex’ kind of vibe "
I changed my bio to reflect I want casual sex but I’d like a fwb or someone I can meet more then once
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I’ve just looked at your profile, honestly, most MF couples want a guy that can pleasure their partner and make their sex life enhance or they get that from seeing each other pleasures etc.
I would say get on tinder get some experience, you could be the best in the world, you might offload on impact and no one will take that risk |
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"Being totally honest OP, a virgin who’s ‘addicted to love’ is unlikely to be what most people here are looking for.
Your first sexual experience can come with all kinds emotions, and there’s a strong chance it could be a one off if you find it through Fab. That’s not an ideal scenario.
I’d suggest, like the person above, you get out amongst the students and see what naturally occurs there. Fab is a tricky place even for the most experienced of us.
It’s a name of a song by Robert palmer
Hmm you make a good point there. I’m trying to join socials but haven’t had much luck
Oh I know it’s a song lyric, but that along with you being a virgin wanting a regular partner isn’t painting a very ‘casual sex’ kind of vibe
I changed my bio to reflect I want casual sex but I’d like a fwb or someone I can meet more then once
"
The trouble is you might not get that. Imagine how your feel if someone ghosted you after your had your first sexual experience with them.
Honestly, this isn’t the place to get started with sex. It really isn’t. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve just looked at your profile, honestly, most MF couples want a guy that can pleasure their partner and make their sex life enhance or they get that from seeing each other pleasures etc.
I would say get on tinder get some experience, you could be the best in the world, you might offload on impact and no one will take that risk"
I could do my best if they showed me what they liked.
I don’t like that site. Endless swiping and seems like a chore |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Being totally honest OP, a virgin who’s ‘addicted to love’ is unlikely to be what most people here are looking for.
Your first sexual experience can come with all kinds emotions, and there’s a strong chance it could be a one off if you find it through Fab. That’s not an ideal scenario.
I’d suggest, like the person above, you get out amongst the students and see what naturally occurs there. Fab is a tricky place even for the most experienced of us.
It’s a name of a song by Robert palmer
Hmm you make a good point there. I’m trying to join socials but haven’t had much luck
Oh I know it’s a song lyric, but that along with you being a virgin wanting a regular partner isn’t painting a very ‘casual sex’ kind of vibe
I changed my bio to reflect I want casual sex but I’d like a fwb or someone I can meet more then once
The trouble is you might not get that. Imagine how your feel if someone ghosted you after your had your first sexual experience with them.
Honestly, this isn’t the place to get started with sex. It really isn’t. "
You make a good point but I wouldn’t be the first and I’d deal with that when it comes to it.
Do you have any suggestions where is a good place? |
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"Being totally honest OP, a virgin who’s ‘addicted to love’ is unlikely to be what most people here are looking for.
Your first sexual experience can come with all kinds emotions, and there’s a strong chance it could be a one off if you find it through Fab. That’s not an ideal scenario.
I’d suggest, like the person above, you get out amongst the students and see what naturally occurs there. Fab is a tricky place even for the most experienced of us.
It’s a name of a song by Robert palmer
Hmm you make a good point there. I’m trying to join socials but haven’t had much luck
Oh I know it’s a song lyric, but that along with you being a virgin wanting a regular partner isn’t painting a very ‘casual sex’ kind of vibe
I changed my bio to reflect I want casual sex but I’d like a fwb or someone I can meet more then once
The trouble is you might not get that. Imagine how your feel if someone ghosted you after your had your first sexual experience with them.
Honestly, this isn’t the place to get started with sex. It really isn’t.
You make a good point but I wouldn’t be the first and I’d deal with that when it comes to it.
Do you have any suggestions where is a good place? "
No, like I said before, I don’t think this scene is suitable |
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By (user no longer on site) 51 weeks ago
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You could ask a club if they've got a privacy list, always worth a laugh
See if any can offer one bean or, none for cash like usual
By that I mean any actual help
Not the private members locker
Let us know in 3 years
Ol'Charlotan Shaggers |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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" No, like I said before, I don’t think this scene is suitable"
While I respect your opinion I think I’ll keep my options open and try for socials here as i think it would help more than leaving |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"You could ask a club if they've got a privacy list, always worth a laugh
See if any can offer one bean or, none for cash like usual
By that I mean any actual help
Not the private members locker
Let us know in 3 years
Ol'Charlotan Shaggers"
They have that? |
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You're doing this whole thing backwards!
When I was your age I was chasing gals on the street and get rejected. Laugh it off and do it again. Eventually someone says yes.
Like the nice lady above said Fabs isn’t the place to get started with sex. Inclined to agree.
You're a student living in student halls, surrounded by horny students who are just looking for a safe boy to mess around with. Someone like you!!!
See the people on Fabs are mostly in their 30s and 40s and are looking for experienced fuckers in those age groups. You're a young pup with no experience so you are really decreasing your chances massively being on this site. You have to know your audience.
I'm older than you and struggle to make meets on here. Most of my meets were via socials or just complete luck but none of it happens had I been in my 20s. The experience I've gained from life and prior relationships certainly helped. And I still think I'm massively inexperienced relative to most people on here as I've had very few partners before.
Someone suggested Tinder - don't do that. Again, the people on there want experience and in many places it turned into a swingers app. There are lots of dating apps aimed at young people and students. Get on those. Find someone with the same level of experience and rock her world. Good luck mate. |
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"You're doing this whole thing backwards!
When I was your age I was chasing gals on the street and get rejected. Laugh it off and do it again. Eventually someone says yes.
Like the nice lady above said Fabs isn’t the place to get started with sex. Inclined to agree.
You're a student living in student halls, surrounded by horny students who are just looking for a safe boy to mess around with. Someone like you!!!
See the people on Fabs are mostly in their 30s and 40s and are looking for experienced fuckers in those age groups. You're a young pup with no experience so you are really decreasing your chances massively being on this site. You have to know your audience.
I'm older than you and struggle to make meets on here. Most of my meets were via socials or just complete luck but none of it happens had I been in my 20s. The experience I've gained from life and prior relationships certainly helped. And I still think I'm massively inexperienced relative to most people on here as I've had very few partners before.
Someone suggested Tinder - don't do that. Again, the people on there want experience and in many places it turned into a swingers app. There are lots of dating apps aimed at young people and students. Get on those. Find someone with the same level of experience and rock her world. Good luck mate. "
Love this |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"You're doing this whole thing backwards!
When I was your age I was chasing gals on the street and get rejected. Laugh it off and do it again. Eventually someone says yes.
Like the nice lady above said Fabs isn’t the place to get started with sex. Inclined to agree.
You're a student living in student halls, surrounded by horny students who are just looking for a safe boy to mess around with. Someone like you!!!
See the people on Fabs are mostly in their 30s and 40s and are looking for experienced fuckers in those age groups. You're a young pup with no experience so you are really decreasing your chances massively being on this site. You have to know your audience.
I'm older than you and struggle to make meets on here. Most of my meets were via socials or just complete luck but none of it happens had I been in my 20s. The experience I've gained from life and prior relationships certainly helped. And I still think I'm massively inexperienced relative to most people on here as I've had very few partners before.
Someone suggested Tinder - don't do that. Again, the people on there want experience and in many places it turned into a swingers app. There are lots of dating apps aimed at young people and students. Get on those. Find someone with the same level of experience and rock her world. Good luck mate. "
I’ve joined socials and got nothing so far so idk where to look to meet these people
I wouldn’t mind someone older tbh
Idk what these apps are tbh so your guess is as good as mine |
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Fab probably isn't the place your going to find what you are looking for you but it can be a good place to get advice if you approach it in the right way and you have. That's a really good start and you should give yourself credit for it.
I can't really give you good advice because I feel your situation is unique but I can tell you that what worked for me was approaching fab as a community and making friends first.
That took some time and I had to push myself a bit to go to social events alone but I have made friends now and feel like there's a community that I'm part of.
You might find that elusive older women who will mentor you like every man dreams of whether he's on fab or not. You probably won't though. That's a fantasy that you can enjoy but shouldn't expect to materialise.
I thought that's what I found. An older women who was very experienced and popular in the community. She turned out to be a predator and took advantage of my naivety and used me until she got bored then then ghosted me. It shook me and destroyed my trust.
That was a hard first experience on fab and for you I think that would be devastating as a first experience in your life.
The best advice I got when I started on FAB was to find your friends and keep your circle small.
Forget sex, that will come. Make friends by going to organised social, no sex events.
Be prepared to walk away from people who aren't good for you.
I guess I did give you some advice.
Best of luck OP.
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By (user no longer on site) 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks "
Blokes outnumber the females
Easy 1000-1 |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Fab probably isn't the place your going to find what you are looking for you but it can be a good place to get advice if you approach it in the right way and you have. That's a really good start and you should give yourself credit for it.
I can't really give you good advice because I feel your situation is unique but I can tell you that what worked for me was approaching fab as a community and making friends first.
That took some time and I had to push myself a bit to go to social events alone but I have made friends now and feel like there's a community that I'm part of.
You might find that elusive older women who will mentor you like every man dreams of whether he's on fab or not. You probably won't though. That's a fantasy that you can enjoy but shouldn't expect to materialise.
I thought that's what I found. An older women who was very experienced and popular in the community. She turned out to be a predator and took advantage of my naivety and used me until she got bored then then ghosted me. It shook me and destroyed my trust.
That was a hard first experience on fab and for you I think that would be devastating as a first experience in your life.
The best advice I got when I started on FAB was to find your friends and keep your circle small.
Forget sex, that will come. Make friends by going to organised social, no sex events.
Be prepared to walk away from people who aren't good for you.
I guess I did give you some advice.
Best of luck OP.
"
Thanks. I knew it wouldn’t be easy but at least I’ve given myself the best start in terms of a profile
I’ll try socials and honestly just to be more confident talking to people
Yeah that elusive women is the dream. I’m sorry what happened to you I’ll watch out for it
I’ll go to socials with the intent of making friends and being out more than sex.
I’ll keep that in mind
Thanks |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"I’ve been here a while and I’ve had a social meet but they blocked me so I felt bad that it was something I did. I get barely any replies to my messages
I’m try and join a social event next month but any advise apart from that? Anything I can change?
Thanks
Blokes outnumber the females
Easy 1000-1"
That sucks |
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It's very possible you will never get a meet here or have any sort of success outside of fab. It's incredibly difficult to get anything. I've been on here about 15 years and had 1 meet and that was 8 years ago. Nothing doing outside of fab since 2002, so women just don't seem to have any interest. All you can do is plug away at it and hope for the best. |
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"I’ve joined socials and got nothing so far so idk where to look to meet these people
I wouldn’t mind someone older tbh
Idk what these apps are tbh so your guess is as good as mine"
Bro! Protect your virginity with your life. Don't just give it away to anyone. You call the shots.
I'd give my left nut to be back in those students halls again. I was too shy and useless back then until I've actually looked around, listened and made viable moves to the land of honey and pussy.
I think that should be your playground. Fabs is absolutely dry af when it comes to us single males and that's the truth.
If you want advice re socials I'll give it'ya. Feel free to message.
That older unicorn lady is as even more rare as the meets you're looking for. And that's rare.
Now the apps. Far easier to meet people on there and yout chances quadruple the moment you sign up.
Hinge, Badoo, Bumble and Boo just from the top of my head. There are girls on there looking for someone like you. Get in there son. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"Everybody is a virgin once, personally (and I can't be the only one) I would take great pride in making someone's first time amazing! - Xeno x
Apologies if I caused offence! "
No not at all. I’d love to meet someone who would enjoy making my first time amazing |
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By (user no longer on site) OP 51 weeks ago
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"So iam looking to update my profile,advice would gladly be appreciated and taken on board "
From the advice I’ve gotten is don’t have dick pics in your main. Keep them private.
Mention why you can’t accommodate as a lot of people assume you’re cheating on someone
Have more body pics and creative ones. Have a look at what other people have |
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By *oxy jWoman 51 weeks ago
somerset |
"So iam looking to update my profile,advice would gladly be appreciated and taken on board
From the advice I’ve gotten is don’t have dick pics in your main. Keep them private.
Mention why you can’t accommodate as a lot of people assume you’re cheating on someone
Have more body pics and creative ones. Have a look at what other people have"
advice is a funny thing and what one person advise you to do is not going to work ...take the dick pic most on the forums tend not to like however the forums are tiny 1% of fab so you take advice from 1% then the other 99% may disagree the forums are full on people that dont meet / rarely meet not all but most ... the forums are not are NOT the rulemakers most of the real players / swingers dont come near the forums so you taking advice from way less than 1% is not going to help ...
now back to the dick pic its a 60/40 thing i myself wont meet without seeing one ie a full body one and i know loads who feel the same deffo the 60% mark what we dont like however is it being shoved in our message box keep it to your profile or when asked for....
im not saying there not some great advice on here as there is but its the one percent / 1% its a tiny tiny part of fab let alone the whole scene ... just remember there no golden rule book for swinging the only things you need to know is concent and no is no... this scence is not hard for guys but extremely hard for guys but to many goodie goodies dont want to be blunt and honest with you ...
attraction is everything tho some will tell you its not yet it those same folk who guess what turn down men in clubs n stuff the only way you will learn if the scene is for you or not is to go on that journey yourself leaning as you go along and become you your version of you not some fake ass who kept asking for advice.. best of luck |
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By *oxy jWoman 51 weeks ago
somerset |
"I can’t say very much. I’m rubbish at talking and haven’t met for casual sex or anything in ages and kinda alittle nervous. lol "
nerves is good it keeps you alert its how you deal with them that matters ... ive been swinging 30+ years and i still gets nerves before a new meet i think the day my nervousness stops is the day i stop swinging .... its a normal human reaction |
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"Everybody is a virgin once, personally (and I can't be the only one) I would take great pride in making someone's first time amazing! - Xeno x
Apologies if I caused offence! "
Wish id known this 6 weeks ago when i lost my V plates to an pro. She was lovely and it was an amazing evening and made itnfar from transactional but someone who i didn't have to pay would have been nice!x |
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