FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Red flags
Red flags
Jump to: Newest in thread
What’s your obvious red flags here? Some are my expectations, others common ones I hear
Couples, only dick pics and not verified as a couple
No verification or pics for years (but just one verified by a single bloke 8 years ago)
Hotter than the sun, no profile copy and 0 verifications and not verified (but I understand you’ll fill it in soon)
We’re a couple, but you gotta meet male first
Chat only on kik/snap
I can’t afford my rent
Please click/like/love/my pic for xxx
I have no limits. None whatsoever and anything goes
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Couples only dick pics is an interesting one ..... I personally tend to see too many couples profiles where it's 99% the female and maybe just one dick pic thrown in!
As for the rest.... wayyyyyy too many to list
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Couples only dick pics is an interesting one ..... I personally tend to see too many couples profiles where it's 99% the female and maybe just one dick pic thrown in!
As for the rest.... wayyyyyy too many to list
"
Yes was going to say the same but subtle difference I think.
Couple with all dick pics - red flag as probably not a couple
Couple where 99% female and one dick pic - red flag (from the perspective of another couple) as although probably a couple if you met it would all be about the lady and the man is either a munter or not likely to be very involved |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Couples with only pics of the female, makes me think he's not really that into it & it's all about her.
When someone sends a message, you read it and within a few mins they've send another, screams pushy or entitled.
Anyone asking if I'm free now, with no chat and who hasn't sent me a face pic or asked me for one. Makes me think anyone would do.
Male profiles where u can see all of various different women & just the blokes hand or cock. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Profiles full of pics of close ups of genitalia (eww) that’s both penis AND vagina
Shouty profiles with list more of what they’re NOT looking for as opposed to what they are looking for
Anyone who expresses their preferences in a way that can be deemed derogatory or discriminatory
Messages requesting things I don’t feel comfortable with or trying to push boundaries (E.g. asking couples asking if I want to play with the male half too when my profile clearly states I’m straight)
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Ooooh more and more each day... One way conversations here or on whatsapp, changing the rules mid chat or after a social. Claiming they want to meet but are too busy then they display a verification, and then another. No pics of the male, female only. Pushy folk and those who want to meet NOW, even if we haven't even chatted or swapped face pics. Those who don't give out the address even the day before the meet. Those who cancel on the day, even worse Those who cancel twice (one couple three times). Those who claim interest just to get to our friends pics then ignore our messages afterwards. Those who say no penetration on the first meet, then again for the second even though no mention on their profile. Demands for more and more photos or videos with no meet in sight. Those who talk of meeting but shy away from arranging one. Sparse profiles, excuses why they have no photos. Joined years ago but no verifications (or from many years ago). Demands for private information too soon. Demands to play on first meet, no interest in a social first. Folk you meet who are dressed in joggers, tatty clothes, d*unk or offering drugs.... and so on |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *impcuckMan
over a year ago
edge of taunton |
people dont discuss thier red flags because then other try and get around them same with most post on here people trying to find out the rights n wrongs id rather let them find out the correct way |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"people dont discuss thier red flags because then other try and get around them same with most post on here people trying to find out the rights n wrongs id rather let them find out the correct way "
Agreed. The more boxes people are able to tick the less of their true selves shows through. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *lan157Man
over a year ago
a village near Haywards Heath in East Sussex |
Any phrase in a profile that indicates how " busy " a woman is with her life or in respect of FAB .It's not going to lead to anything worthwhile if they cannot make time to meet . Second red flag is one sentence replies to a message. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Wanting to “push your boundaries”
What does no mean to you? "
Oh yes, such a narcissistic thing to say. You just know it’s going to be all about them and how they think they can make you do other things people haven’t. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Wanting to “push your boundaries”
What does no mean to you?
Oh yes, such a narcissistic thing to say. You just know it’s going to be all about them and how they think they can make you do other things people haven’t."
To be fair there is a whole dynamic at play here where this is sought after and specifically asked for by the receiver. It's an entirely separate discussion in itself, but there is a world of difference between ignoring strictly laid out hard limits, and pushing people where they desire to be pushed. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Um.
The biggest red flag for me is if they're damaged enough to message me at all "
But aren't all the most fun folk a little damaged?
Not reading the profile. Unsolicited Cock Shots, People that can't hold a decent conversation about what they want. Drama.
There are probably more |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Bottom line - ask questions probing questions and those lying will soon get angry or blame you for asking too many questions. If you are a couple or single lady, you can never be too careful meeting people - so share with others who you are meeting etc or always meet in a public place first time
we always deamnd they bloke send us their face pic holding our user name next to it, works for us |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Profiles full of pics of close ups of genitalia (eww) that’s both penis AND vagina
Shouty profiles with list more of what they’re NOT looking for as opposed to what they are looking for
Anyone who expresses their preferences in a way that can be deemed derogatory or discriminatory
Messages requesting things I don’t feel comfortable with or trying to push boundaries (E.g. asking couples asking if I want to play with the male half too when my profile clearly states I’m straight)
"
Blame that on the amount of guys on here who claim they are straight but are as gay as they come on the guys site |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Profiles full of pics of close ups of genitalia (eww) that’s both penis AND vagina
Shouty profiles with list more of what they’re NOT looking for as opposed to what they are looking for
Anyone who expresses their preferences in a way that can be deemed derogatory or discriminatory
Messages requesting things I don’t feel comfortable with or trying to push boundaries (E.g. asking couples asking if I want to play with the male half too when my profile clearly states I’m straight)
"
This |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Profiles full of pics of close ups of genitalia (eww) that’s both penis AND vagina
Shouty profiles with list more of what they’re NOT looking for as opposed to what they are looking for
Anyone who expresses their preferences in a way that can be deemed derogatory or discriminatory
Messages requesting things I don’t feel comfortable with or trying to push boundaries (E.g. asking couples asking if I want to play with the male half too when my profile clearly states I’m straight)
"
Spot on. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We can be put off very quickly by pushiness or over enthusiasm. We prefer people a little more chilled out. Some people go 0-100 in a couple of messages or just message all the time. Ideally we'd prefer to keep talk to establishing basic chemistry, making arrangements and then saving the chat until we meet in person.
Also we're no here for girl on girl show or to feel like a girl on girl experiment. Which of course is a perfectly legitimate desire and some express this openly in their profile. However some couples/females can be sly about this until down the line. We both like to be active participants and Mrs likes the guys and women. Sometimes its later on it becomes apparent that they just want the guys to watch or not touch the other female (which again is perfectly legitimate but not for us). Also no problem with it being a ladies first time with another woman. But it's just the way some people go about saying it that makes it sound more like they are looking for a live female sex toy to experiment with rather than something just natural. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
For the record - i rarely reply to a so-called couple where mr is playing alone. Block them, our choice as it is yours.
I recall meeting men frequently on a nautust beach and the club we used to go to - they would often say, "my gf/wife is joining me in a while..." You know the "GF/wife" they were referring to, yes, the imaginary one. As we got more confident re club/beach, I used to say, we are a bit buy now, come back when she is here, lol |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"For the record - i rarely reply to a so-called couple where mr is playing alone. Block them, our choice as it is yours.
I recall meeting men frequently on a nautust beach and the club we used to go to - they would often say, "my gf/wife is joining me in a while..." You know the "GF/wife" they were referring to, yes, the imaginary one. As we got more confident re club/beach, I used to say, we are a bit buy now, come back when she is here, lol "
With regards clubs sometimes due to commitments I'll be there alone with Mrs coming to meet me later (or the other way round). Or either of us on the rare occasion there alone all evening or with freinds. However I'm not there to be entertained by people seeing me as a stepping stone to the Mrs. I wouldn't want that. When I'm there alone I just want people who are intrested in me as an individual.
And why would anyone who just wants couples play with guy before the Mrs comes? I don't know what guys aim to achieve by lying about it? It depends the context of how a guy says it but likewise if we smell BS as a way to win favour with us we'd say the same |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"Profiles full of pics of close ups of genitalia (eww) that’s both penis AND vagina
Shouty profiles with list more of what they’re NOT looking for as opposed to what they are looking for
Anyone who expresses their preferences in a way that can be deemed derogatory or discriminatory
Messages requesting things I don’t feel comfortable with or trying to push boundaries (E.g. asking couples asking if I want to play with the male half too when my profile clearly states I’m straight)
"
Yup sums it up for me (well except for couples, they ask if I want to play with females and I'm straight too!) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic