FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Do women think badly of single men here?
Do women think badly of single men here?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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hey guys  im Jack.
been on and off for several months now, i've had only one meet, even though most people think thats more than most ha.
most girls on here seem to think im a timewaster just cos im a single lad, any ideas on how to get past that? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hey guys im Jack.
been on and off for several months now, i've had only one meet, even though most people think thats more than most ha.
most girls on here seem to think im a timewaster just cos im a single lad, any ideas on how to get past that?"
upload sum pics maybe |
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What do you see as 'time wasting' if you mean women chat and arrange meets with you then dont turn up then thats not good.
Your profile says you will try anything ???? is that true, because just prior to that it says you dont mind trying things with a couple as long as he doesnt touch you. Sometimes when 2 men are involved with one woman a leg brushes a leg etc, so unless you mean you want to shag the wife while he goes to the loo then maybe you need to adjust the wording.
Not critisizing just trying to figure out why you are suffering 'time wasters'.
 |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"U need to stand out from the crowed mate a cock is a cock but women like to know who u actually are"
Sais the bloke with the same type of profile pic as me |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's because lots of guys on here are timewasters, fantasists, or both. Thats why genuine guys find it harder to meet. I've met lots of couples who say they are messed around by guys all the time. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's because lots of guys on here are timewasters, fantasists, or both. Thats why genuine guys find it harder to meet. I've met lots of couples who say they are messed around by guys all the time."
That's what I get told alot and why I gave up in the end |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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ah thanks guys, im tempted to upload a few pics, but whats wrong with private messaging pics?
i come across nice and genuine but it just seems like a no go |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"ah thanks guys, im tempted to upload a few pics, but whats wrong with private messaging pics?
i come across nice and genuine but it just seems like a no go"
It is a no go mate, only on now cause I have been to the pub  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"U need to stand out from the crowed mate a cock is a cock but women like to know who u actually are
Sais the bloke with the same type of profile pic as me"
I got face pics which I send when asked and ur cock ain't as nice as mine ha ha |
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I just had to read this thread didnt i.
OK Jack
"im a laid back man, im really friendly, im not pushy,"
Really im a bloke, and the other bits of your profile seem pushy to me.
Example: I dont think there is a woman out there that doesnt like someone fit so why say - move on then.
They dont mind me without even a 4 pack if they like outher thing about us.
You say youve only met on fem directly from here, well mate, that one more than me. But I go to clubs and talk to people, real people, nice people and yes i get enough action both singly and as a couple with my FB. Dont expect too much from this or any other site.
the secret is to really talk to people oneliners like:
I saw your pic, aint interested in yer profile, wanna fuck (& probably without the punctuation). isnt going to cut the mustard with anyone. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I like to think I lead by example so with a positive attitude it can help...
Some times it sucks on fab but then sometimes Im screwed...so give and take I guess...keep the faith  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I like to think I lead by example so with a positive attitude it can help...
Some times it sucks on fab but then sometimes Im screwed...so give and take I guess...keep the faith "
Sucks all the time , never get a look in |
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Single men by en large are fine on this site the problem is the percentage of good guys to idiots is about the same as with all the demographics but as the site is about 75% single men it makes it seem worse.
Just remember there are a huge number of guys and not many single females and couples who meet guys so it exasperates the difficulty of getting a meet.
|
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"ah thanks guys, im tempted to upload a few pics, but whats wrong with private messaging pics?
i come across nice and genuine but it just seems like a no go"
Because a lot of people browse for people Instead of waiting for messages to land in their inbox. And most of those people will pass by profiles with no pics. You don't have to put face pics In public just a few nice varied body shots.
Also ignore the negative comments on here. There's plenty of single guys that get lots of meets!! X |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes they do but don't let that bother you just make sure you do the right things and it will be a positive for you."
Only so many knocks you can take but my head is still held high |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I seem to get some interest from couples.
The problem is i'll be in bed at 1am trying but failing to sleep, when a couple will msg asking to meet there and then.
Have some respect, and lets be honest they are only messaging at that time because their original meet bailed.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I seem to get some interest from couples.
The problem is i'll be in bed at 1am trying but failing to sleep, when a couple will msg asking to meet there and then.
Have some respect, and lets be honest they are only messaging at that time because their original meet bailed.
"
They think we are peforming seals and will go running when they click their fingers personally I would rather wank |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes they do, they think we are all desperate so treat us like shit"
I don't. 
Some single blokes are cool.
Some are bitter and not worth spending any time on them.... |
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"I seem to get some interest from couples.
The problem is i'll be in bed at 1am trying but failing to sleep, when a couple will msg asking to meet there and then.
Have some respect, and lets be honest they are only messaging at that time because their original meet bailed.
"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Single men by en large are fine on this site the problem is the percentage of good guys to idiots is about the same as with all the demographics but as the site is about 75% single men it makes it seem worse.
Just remember there are a huge number of guys and not many single females and couples who meet guys so it exasperates the difficulty of getting a meet.
"
 This. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes they do, they think we are all desperate so treat us like shit
I don't.
Some single blokes are cool.
Some are bitter and not worth spending any time on them...."
If im bitter its all the abuse and timewasters I have encountered on here |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!  "
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose |
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"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange..."
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We don't meet couples, only single men, well single black men anyway, so it's not all bad!"
What because one couple in the UK meets single men only?
Haha, i'm kidding |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
I think badly of SOME single men but definitely not all, else I wouldn't get any meets.
And don't believe what some people say about women getting to pick and choose. I can struggle to get a meet just as much as others on here. Though the reason for that is because I like to actually like the person I am meeting. Not choosy, just particular. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange...
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x "
Most people on here are horny quite regularly, so arranging something should be a pretty simple task... |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange...
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x "
Whaaaattt?? You don't know when you're going to be horny? I have it in my Filofax! |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose"
Maybe we can and maybe we can't, but it's the attitude of some men on here that totally turns me off, I haven't had a new meet in months but I'd rather 'go without' than just have sex with anyone just because I am horny, I have toys for those moments and I don't moan on forum posts either |
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"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange...
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x
Most people on here are horny quite regularly, so arranging something should be a pretty simple task..."
And this is where you are mistaken. For example.. If I went out with friends this Saturday and managed to arrange a sitter which is something I don't get to si very often and got home and thought is see if anyone was about and wanted to meet. If there wasn't it could be weeks or even months before I have chance again.
A hell of a lot of people on here have young families, shift work and god knows how many other things that they prioritise before they can meet. They aren't all sat by their laptops dressed in stockings waiting for an offer. |
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"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange...
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x
Whaaaattt?? You don't know when you're going to be horny? I have it in my Filofax! "
Apparently most people are horny all
The time. Even If that were the case I have a child and a life outside of fab that I have to prioritise! Lol x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose
Maybe we can and maybe we can't, but it's the attitude of some men on here that totally turns me off, I haven't had a new meet in months but I'd rather 'go without' than just have sex with anyone just because I am horny, I have toys for those moments and I don't moan on forum posts either "
I only moan when I've been to the pub couldn't care less really |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange...
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x
Most people on here are horny quite regularly, so arranging something should be a pretty simple task...
They aren't all sat by their laptops dressed in stockings waiting for an offer. "
Well they should be!
Joking, yea i do see your point now to be fair. I'm not stressed out like some people ITT are, but mainly because i dont treat this site too seriously.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose"
Then why not try and be different and be positive? It's no easier for women on here than guys!
Yes the numbers work in their favour - but then single guys don't seem to have the same problems - dealing with constant inane messages and an expectancy that they will drop their knickers just because someone's decided to send a message!
You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window. This isn't 'insta-shag'. Look at yourself and your messages and ask yourself would you reply/be in any way attracted if the shoe was on the other foot? There are many more 'standard responses' to any thread showing negativity or expressing disappointment about life on Fab - but those will do for now! |
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"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose
Maybe we can and maybe we can't, but it's the attitude of some men on here that totally turns me off, I haven't had a new meet in months but I'd rather 'go without' than just have sex with anyone just because I am horny, I have toys for those moments and I don't moan on forum posts either
I only moan when I've been to the pub couldn't care less really"
For someone who doesn't care you do seen hell bent on going on about it lol x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So many guys with a sense of entitlement on here. If you aren't getting replies to your messages then reassess what you're saying to people. Personally i wouldn't reply to anyone on here who is bitter and moany. Its meant to be fun - if you find it isn't then just leave. |
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"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange...
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x
Most people on here are horny quite regularly, so arranging something should be a pretty simple task...
They aren't all sat by their laptops dressed in stockings waiting for an offer.
Well they should be!
Joking, yea i do see your point now to be fair. I'm not stressed out like some people ITT are, but mainly because i dont treat this site too seriously.
"
Good! It should be fun. And once you get pissed off like some of the people who have posted repeatedly if that were me if just leave. Your a good looking lad with a nice body, tbh your age prob isn't doing you any favours a lot of young lads struggle. Keep at it and it will happen!! x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes they do, they think we are all desperate so treat us like shit"
A lot of men on this site think the women are desperate for a man and treat us the same way |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"
Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny?
Unlikely the case, as they never want to rearrange...
For another time? Kinda beats the whole 'we are horny now wanna meet' tho doesn't it? I'm horny now wanna meet? No, sorry care to rearrange? Oh yes we will next be horny at 8.30'a week Tuesday? Lol x
Most people on here are horny quite regularly, so arranging something should be a pretty simple task...
They aren't all sat by their laptops dressed in stockings waiting for an offer.
Well they should be!
Joking, yea i do see your point now to be fair. I'm not stressed out like some people ITT are, but mainly because i dont treat this site too seriously.
Good! It should be fun. And once you get pissed off like some of the people who have posted repeatedly if that were me if just leave. Your a good looking lad with a nice body, tbh your age prob isn't doing you any favours a lot of young lads struggle. Keep at it and it will happen!! x"
Is that an invite? Haha, thank you |
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
I personally do not consider anybody a timewaster until they have proven to me that they are.
I do not consider single men as bad.
I do not consider single women as bad.
I do not consider couple, TVs, CD s etc as bad. You get my drift.
I rather dislike generalisations based on a handful of (possibly bad) experiences and it sometimes feels as if single men in particular are getting a raw deal on here.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window."
No, you really don't. The shop window analogy is pretty fallacious, implying that a single male profile has its own, fairly positioned placement in a shopping district where its likely to garner however much business as the shop keeper is willing to work for, when in effect a single males profile is more like a single stall in an exceptionally loud, messy and vastly overcrowded market. Sure, you can dress it up, make sure you have the best wares, display them in the best fashion and even advertise to the fullest of your ability, but regardless of all of this, the sheer, utter excess of supply vs demand when it comes to single males will always work against you - thats the real reason why single males are treated like shit, theres just too many of them. |
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"hey guys im Jack.
been on and off for several months now, i've had only one meet, even though most people think thats more than most ha.
most girls on here seem to think im a timewaster just cos im a single lad, any ideas on how to get past that?"
well done for taking on board some of the comments that you agree with and changing some bits.
there was a thread in the forum a couple of months ago asking how often people actually met, most said around once a month or less, so just be assured that everyone isnt getting 'lucky' every night etc. Its a friendly site with friendly people, most of whom like to take their time and pick their meets carefully. We all havelives outside of here (as you do too)..... so dont think that its your profile or you that is wrong, its just circumstances.
Enjoy the site, chat, forum, cams etc and when it happens enjoy the meets.
xxx good luck xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window.
No, you really don't. The shop window analogy is pretty fallacious, implying that a single male profile has its own, fairly positioned placement in a shopping district where its likely to garner however much business as the shop keeper is willing to work for, when in effect a single males profile is more like a single stall in an exceptionally loud, messy and vastly overcrowded market. Sure, you can dress it up, make sure you have the best wares, display them in the best fashion and even advertise to the fullest of your ability, but regardless of all of this, the sheer, utter excess of supply vs demand when it comes to single males will always work against you - thats the real reason why single males are treated like shit, theres just too many of them."
Yet again - we'll have to agree to disagree!
And I'm pretty sure you'll find most guys that are meeting, having good conversations, enjoying the social side as well as the sex - and who find themselves in a position where they both send AND receive initial messages due to putting some effort into their profile content, their posts on the forums and if in chat, show respect and an ability to keep their duck off cam - might just agree with me? |
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
"You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window.
No, you really don't. The shop window analogy is pretty fallacious, implying that a single male profile has its own, fairly positioned placement in a shopping district where its likely to garner however much business as the shop keeper is willing to work for, when in effect a single males profile is more like a single stall in an exceptionally loud, messy and vastly overcrowded market. Sure, you can dress it up, make sure you have the best wares, display them in the best fashion and even advertise to the fullest of your ability, but regardless of all of this, the sheer, utter excess of supply vs demand when it comes to single males will always work against you - thats the real reason why single males are treated like shit, theres just too many of them."
But it is your shop window! Most women will read the profile of a person who has just messaged them, before they open the message (myself included) and if the profile is extremely lazy, ie 'Looking for fun, up for anything' Then I will not even bother looking at the message, yes us females can be very fickle at times |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window.
No, you really don't. The shop window analogy is pretty fallacious, implying that a single male profile has its own, fairly positioned placement in a shopping district where its likely to garner however much business as the shop keeper is willing to work for, when in effect a single males profile is more like a single stall in an exceptionally loud, messy and vastly overcrowded market. Sure, you can dress it up, make sure you have the best wares, display them in the best fashion and even advertise to the fullest of your ability, but regardless of all of this, the sheer, utter excess of supply vs demand when it comes to single males will always work against you - thats the real reason why single males are treated like shit, theres just too many of them."
Maybe some guys just shout louder than others.
Seriously though, if there are single men on here getting multiple meets (and there are) then it might be worth keeping an eye on them to see what they do right. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose
Maybe we can and maybe we can't, but it's the attitude of some men on here that totally turns me off, I haven't had a new meet in months but I'd rather 'go without' than just have sex with anyone just because I am horny, I have toys for those moments and I don't moan on forum posts either
I only moan when I've been to the pub couldn't care less really
For someone who doesn't care you do seen hell bent on going on about it lol x "
I'm on a wind up . I apologise |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window.
No, you really don't. The shop window analogy is pretty fallacious, implying that a single male profile has its own, fairly positioned placement in a shopping district where its likely to garner however much business as the shop keeper is willing to work for, when in effect a single males profile is more like a single stall in an exceptionally loud, messy and vastly overcrowded market. Sure, you can dress it up, make sure you have the best wares, display them in the best fashion and even advertise to the fullest of your ability, but regardless of all of this, the sheer, utter excess of supply vs demand when it comes to single males will always work against you - thats the real reason why single males are treated like shit, theres just too many of them.
Maybe some guys just shout louder than others.
Seriously though, if there are single men on here getting multiple meets (and there are) then it might be worth keeping an eye on them to see what they do right."
You have to be determined and confident. But most of all actually turn up and perform when you get the chance. |
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By *yrdwomanWoman
over a year ago
Putting the 'cum' in Eboracum |
"You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window.
No, you really don't. The shop window analogy is pretty fallacious, implying that a single male profile has its own, fairly positioned placement in a shopping district where its likely to garner however much business as the shop keeper is willing to work for, when in effect a single males profile is more like a single stall in an exceptionally loud, messy and vastly overcrowded market. Sure, you can dress it up, make sure you have the best wares, display them in the best fashion and even advertise to the fullest of your ability, but regardless of all of this, the sheer, utter excess of supply vs demand when it comes to single males will always work against you - thats the real reason why single males are treated like shit, theres just too many of them.
Maybe some guys just shout louder than others.
Seriously though, if there are single men on here getting multiple meets (and there are) then it might be worth keeping an eye on them to see what they do right. You have to be determined and confident. But most of all actually turn up and perform when you get the chance."
I think just being nice to others goes a long way. I know it might sound wussy but I am more likely to respond to a message that shows some interest in me, not what the guy wants to do. Also, it gets said again and again but I see the guys who admit to going to clubs and socials being much more successful. Not always, but mostly. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be honest.. Guys are way too sleezy on here sometimes., i think be fuckin honest for fuck sake. The chat rooms are way too funny with guys commenting on every little thing they see. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Yes they do, they think we are all desperate so treat us like shit
A lot of men on this site think the women are desperate for a man and treat us the same way "
Agreed x |
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I've had the most disgusting message from a woman. So I would say that some women DO make the most shocking sexually excruciating suggestions seemingly without any consideration for a man.
MY TOES STAY IN MY SOCKS!!!!!!!!!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I object to any sweeping statements about single gents being treated like shit.
Some deserve to be treated with contempt because of the way they treat women.
Others deserve to be treated with respect as they do not treat women as a piece of meat or just a notch on the bed post, or holes to stick their dicks in them.
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By *phroditeWoman
over a year ago
(She/ her) in Sensualityland |
"I object to any sweeping statements about single gents being treated like shit.
Some deserve to be treated with contempt because of the way they treat women.
Others deserve to be treated with respect as they do not treat women as a piece of meat or just a notch on the bed post, or holes to stick their dicks in them.
"
Absolutely. And likewise the vast majority of women are great fun on here - but some feel the need to be quite what I can only describe as "anti men" and I am not sure what that is all about? |
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"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose
Maybe we can and maybe we can't, but it's the attitude of some men on here that totally turns me off, I haven't had a new meet in months but I'd rather 'go without' than just have sex with anyone just because I am horny, I have toys for those moments and I don't moan on forum posts either "
well done nice lady x |
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By *abioMan
over a year ago
Newcastle and Gateshead |
"You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window.
No, you really don't. The shop window analogy is pretty fallacious, implying that a single male profile has its own, fairly positioned placement in a shopping district where its likely to garner however much business as the shop keeper is willing to work for, when in effect a single males profile is more like a single stall in an exceptionally loud, messy and vastly overcrowded market. Sure, you can dress it up, make sure you have the best wares, display them in the best fashion and even advertise to the fullest of your ability, but regardless of all of this, the sheer, utter excess of supply vs demand when it comes to single males will always work against you - thats the real reason why single males are treated like shit, theres just too many of them."
actually the shop window analogy does work for this respect.......
imagine your local high street... there are a hundred shops... 99 of them look the same, drab, look like no effort has been made....
1 of them is shiny, sparkly, looks like an effort has been made to stand out, tells you want to can by and entice you...
now... which is your eye going to be drawn to???
if there is an excess... you have to find ways of drawing people in, and your profile is one of those ways.... its not the only way, but it is a way of telling people "I am different!!!!"
and it that respect.... you DO get out what you put in!
the site gives you the tools to make it work.... use all of them, use some of them, use none of them... in the end, the decision in what you do/don't use, that is up to you!!! |
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I don't think I treat single guys badly. Even though it says on my profile I'm in a couple, and not meeting single guys right now, I'm still happy to chat with them and try to answer all messages, within reason. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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guys you need to understand that the single women and couples that meet single men get huge amounts of mail, how are they supposed to sort it all out? Generally you wont get a reply but seeing it as a personal rejection is silly. I have been on here a few months and have met 5 single women, 2 couples and been to 3 parties, so i dont see the problem. Some advice - Read profiles properly - only message people when you really think you match there profile - if you hear nothing back dont message again - send intelligent replies - be respectful. Its not hard (until you get lucky) oh and some humour is always good |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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We like single men being on here we would always suggest to have atleast one public picture. We always reply to messages even if it is a no but I do like receiving messages that make me giggle (hence the nickname) all the advice above is good take it on board and carry on searching x |
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"So many guys with a sense of entitlement on here. If you aren't getting replies to your messages then reassess what you're saying to people. Personally i wouldn't reply to anyone on here who is bitter and moany. Its meant to be fun - if you find it isn't then just leave. "
This. A female friend on here told me too many men think this website is called instant shag not fab swingers. She said too many men think sending a message should guarantee a meet. She got a message the other day from a guy who clearly not read her profile. It was a one line message. She deleted it. He sent another message calling her an ignorant bitch and blocked her. She simply blocked him back and go on with her life.
I know not all single guys think and behave like this but there are a fair few that do. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hey guys im Jack.
been on and off for several months now, i've had only one meet, even though most people think thats more than most ha.
most girls on here seem to think im a timewaster just cos im a single lad, any ideas on how to get past that?"
Uv opened the door for sarcasm and insult there buddy lol, single guys are bottom of the food chain unfortunately, i went thru years of trying to be nice and polite and humorous and and, not much changes here when ur a couple so dont get disheartened. Pics are a good idea tho, a good facial and body shot or two. Check as much about the person/people as you can to see if they are into single guys as they usually dont even acknowledge you, with the attitude that you shd have looked/checked. Conversation is a complete mission with most here anyway, you can write a nice long and detailed intro and ul get back....yes mate, any face pics! lol We dont look at faces, not first anyway, we look for intelligence and personality, the former usually covers risk issues the latter self explanatory. Its tricky for most mate, lots cant even be bothered to read your profile if its over one paragraph....no idea that oral sex poses a huge risk, condom/safe sex shouted all across every page...huge libraries of pose material and all topped off with the funniest deciding factor ever, the face lmao |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"hey guys im Jack.
been on and off for several months now, i've had only one meet, even though most people think thats more than most ha.
most girls on here seem to think im a timewaster just cos im a single lad, any ideas on how to get past that?"
You've no pics, you can't accommodate and you don't get much time to meet.
To many that would mean you were anything but single. 
XXXX |
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By *scariMan
over a year ago
Taunton |
i find being positive , friendly and polite works.
I choose to keep my pics and veri's private from general veiw but usually attach a pic to a message.
Have never been treated "like shite" on here and never had a bad meet.
Maybe the OP and the negative types should consider they are just not the type of the people they are messaging! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"There seems to be a few negative men on this post, that would be an instant turn off for me!
Not all females treat single men like sh*te, it works both ways and yes I do meet single men!
Hundreds of negative men on here, hundreds . Ladies don't have this problem as they can pick and chose
Then why not try and be different and be positive? It's no easier for women on here than guys!
Yes the numbers work in their favour - but then single guys don't seem to have the same problems - dealing with constant inane messages and an expectancy that they will drop their knickers just because someone's decided to send a message!
You'll get out what you put in. You're profile is your shop window. This isn't 'insta-shag'. Look at yourself and your messages and ask yourself would you reply/be in any way attracted if the shoe was on the other foot? There are many more 'standard responses' to any thread showing negativity or expressing disappointment about life on Fab - but those will do for now!"
never a truer word spoken!! |
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"Most girls on here seem to think im a timewaster just cos im a single lad, any ideas on how to get past that?"
Are you sure, why do you assume this? We dont assume every guy we speak to on here is a time waster unless weve been let down for the 3rd/4th time or strung along with lies.
I will say though, weve been on here for over a year now and whilst we've had and met some lovely guys the majority of the messages we get off guys are either to waste our time/string us along for webcamming or disrespectful.
It just paints a bad picture for the rest of the guys on here, we do bare it in mind and know single guys get it hard on a whole on here but it doesnt really help the cause and kind puts me (Mrs) off anyway when we do encounter those who mess us about.
Good luck anyway hun, Mrs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Don't get so desperate.
Mrs N is not a Sow and there isn't time to reply to everyone. Thank goodness for the single male block. There are plenty of fish in the sea and in the lottery of life there is always a chance it's YOU lol.
You have to look nice, have a half decent face in private gallery which isn't all blurry or small so you have to squint, Not be cheating and definitely not smoke. So there you go. Keep your fingers crossed and you may be the lucky one LOL. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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It's all about being respectfull, not just talking to the female in a couple, and being polite, all my veris all say how respectfull I am and that's the golden rule, well for me anyway |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"It's all about being respectfull, not just talking to the female in a couple, and being polite, all my veris all say how respectfull I am and that's the golden rule, well for me anyway "
And that I would agree, you are very respectful |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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- Have public pictures.
- Explain (whilst maintaining enough vagueness for anonymity) exactly why you can't accom & don't have a chance to meet many ladies. Being vague smacks of cheating (which is fine, but you have to be honest so every one can make informed decisions).
- Be more specific about what you want, otherwise you look desperate.
- Be more specific about yourself- how would a female friend describe you?
You are vague, snappy and lack pictures. All of that makes you unattractive and when 'single' males are the dominant demographic on this site you really do have to do better.
Of course, I am here as neither a woman or a man, but I do (when in chat & on cam) get inundated with messages. I am brutal about who I speak with at length for because otherwise I would never be done on this site.
Empathy is a powerful tool. Use it. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Face pics probably best as it shows you're open about being on here (although you can always legitimately cite professional discretion as a requirement) and allows you to be ruled in/out on the basis of attraction.
Otherwise definitely body on profile, maybe a cock (although that's a turn off for some- but can be a vital selling point for others) and always a face pic with your initial message AND every subsequent message. I reckon that because some ladies/couples have such cluttered inboxes they sometime delete ANY message they see without pics attached even if it is someone they've spoken to before just because they can't keep track of the usernames they're corresponding with. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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" Or they've been out down the pub or for a meal and have got home horny? "
For a meal?? When I have a meal all I want is a nap after, must be an age thing |
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By *aaLaaWoman
over a year ago
Pontesbury |
"Face pics probably best as it shows you're open about being on here (although you can always legitimately cite professional discretion as a requirement) and allows you to be ruled in/out on the basis of attraction.
Otherwise definitely body on profile, maybe a cock (although that's a turn off for some- but can be a vital selling point for others) and always a face pic with your initial message AND every subsequent message. I reckon that because some ladies/couples have such cluttered inboxes they sometime delete ANY message they see without pics attached even if it is someone they've spoken to before just because they can't keep track of the usernames they're corresponding with."
Unfortunately true, not so much the deleting, (though I have done it  ) but just being able to remember who I'm talking to, a profile pic really helps, and for me it's preferably anything but a cock pic. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I've been a member of this site for some time now and still haven't had a meet to this day... I understand the fact women get tons of messages daily and can't reply to all but for some guys it must really kill them inside to send bitter messages back lol I believe I'm respectful and have a rounded profile not too crude yet not too vague but still struggle... Guess you just have to stay positive and think to your self where your going wrong... A part of me believes it may be my age or the simple fact I have no verifications to vouch for me  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends how desperate and needy you come across. A good positive attitude helps. Also pics and a worded profile that says a little about you, what your looking for and what the other may receive..
Personally, I only meet single guys but your profile doesn't make you any more special or stand out from most I see.
Good luck in your search anyway! |
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I don't think women think badly of single guys at all, it's just most of them get a deluge of replies and can pick and chose, not got for us guys but a fact. Plus they get messed about just like we do! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Post good clear pics. Say something about yourself and what you like to do with the girl(s) . Be honest . As a single girl I get a lot of single guys message me and all they say us can we meet!! I like to get to know someone first see if there is a connection. Give it time maybe go to a club or two meet some Singkes or couples that way you will get some verifications too. Good luck x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't care really anymore if I'm honest it no longer bothers me. I might have only had a couple of meets but if that's all I'm getting then that's all im getting. I know i am very genuine, respectable non pushy polite guy who won't just meet any one. Have turned more meets down than i have accepted because i have standards and respect myself |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Im married and prefer single guys because unlike me they dont have a wife or partner to work around. Husband in my case just to make that clear. Im not a timewaster but prefer to meet only local guys because I cant travel and dont see why they should, but if they wanted to, well then very nice. I have some married guys on my friends list, 2 of which Ive known for a while but couldnt meet. One of them is fairly local to me and we have both said we would love to meet up after camming and msging/texting, so am backtracking a little. Ive never cancelled any meets but have had some cancelled on me. Hope you get sorted. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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dont think its a case of thinking bad of a single lad its more how you make the 1st impression and stand out of the crowd, keep trying im sure theres a lady out there willing to meet you xxx |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't care really anymore if I'm honest it no longer bothers me. I might have only had a couple of meets but if that's all I'm getting then that's all im getting. I know i am very genuine, respectable non pushy polite guy who won't just meet any one. Have turned more meets down than i have accepted because i have standards and respect myself "
respectable?? did u not say about how woman treat u like shit.. lol |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't care really anymore if I'm honest it no longer bothers me. I might have only had a couple of meets but if that's all I'm getting then that's all im getting. I know i am very genuine, respectable non pushy polite guy who won't just meet any one. Have turned more meets down than i have accepted because i have standards and respect myself
respectable?? did u not say about how woman treat u like shit.. lol"
Yeah I did , treated like shit for no reason |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I don't care really anymore if I'm honest it no longer bothers me. I might have only had a couple of meets but if that's all I'm getting then that's all im getting. I know i am very genuine, respectable non pushy polite guy who won't just meet any one. Have turned more meets down than i have accepted because i have standards and respect myself
respectable?? did u not say about how woman treat u like shit.. lol
Yeah I did , treated like shit for no reason "
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By *ouldyou2Man
over a year ago
west Midlands |
"It's because lots of guys on here are timewasters, fantasists, or both. Thats why genuine guys find it harder to meet. I've met lots of couples who say they are messed around by guys all the time."
but ain't they entitled to a chance ! Maybe some women and couples know they can be choosy so they choose the ones they think are great and a boost to their ego and then let down ! Oooh controversial
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By *oxy_minxWoman
over a year ago
Scotland - Aberdeen |
The same person making the same negative remarks! If the site is that bad why are you still here? I'm truely interested!
Whilst being here as a single female (for over three years), have I had a meet in months? No I haven't...Am I complaining? No I'm not...
Is the caliber and the approach of men a low standard? To 'me' yes they are! So in that case I will then choose who I meet and who I wont, I just get so fed up of peoples attitudes, I'd just rather go without! But as they say'each to their own' So for the time being I will be going without! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The same person making the same negative remarks! If the site is that bad why are you still here? I'm truely interested!
Whilst being here as a single female (for over three years), have I had a meet in months? No I haven't...Am I complaining? No I'm not...
Is the caliber and the approach of men a low standard? To 'me' yes they are! So in that case I will then choose who I meet and who I wont, I just get so fed up of peoples attitudes, I'd just rather go without! But as they say'each to their own' So for the time being I will be going without! "
I already dispensed awesome advice to the very same on a different thread, have a search and see what you think |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"The same person making the same negative remarks! If the site is that bad why are you still here? I'm truely interested!
Whilst being here as a single female (for over three years), have I had a meet in months? No I haven't...Am I complaining? No I'm not...
Is the caliber and the approach of men a low standard? To 'me' yes they are! So in that case I will then choose who I meet and who I wont, I just get so fed up of peoples attitudes, I'd just rather go without! But as they say'each to their own' So for the time being I will be going without! "
I never complained about not getting a meet, that really does not bother me. Its the way we are treated and spoken to at times. Not all couples are like that but many do like to think all they have to do is click their fingers and I will go running . When I don't I get shitty messages about timewasting etc etc . Its clearl a dent to their egos that someone should say no to them
That was all I was saying , if this has upset anybody I apologize.
I will now behave
Goodnight |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I find a lot of the single men who message me either obviously haven't read my profile,have the conversational skills of a teaspoon,or are just plain rude.Not all men are like that though,some actually manage more than a one line message saying "Suck my dick tonight" or "I want to make you my slut"  to you single guys that put some thought into your messages,actually read profiles,and don't demand meets instantly and don't become abusive when you don't get the answer you wanted,thank you,it doesn't go unnoticed and your decency is appreciated,keep it up and you will find what you desire if you are patient enough.I've chatted to some lovely single men on here,so they definitely exist,it's just the idiots and dreamers unfortunately outnumber you and give you a bad rep  xx |
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By *scariMan
over a year ago
Taunton |
"I've been a member of this site for some time now and still haven't had a meet to this day... I understand the fact women get tons of messages daily and can't reply to all but for some guys it must really kill them inside to send bitter messages back lol I believe I'm respectful and have a rounded profile not too crude yet not too vague but still struggle... Guess you just have to stay positive and think to your self where your going wrong... A part of me believes it may be my age or the simple fact I have no verifications to vouch for me "
I would suggest you are definately doing something wrong!
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By *ouldyou2Man
over a year ago
west Midlands |
"I find a lot of the single men who message me either obviously haven't read my profile,have the conversational skills of a teaspoon,or are just plain rude.Not all men are like that though,some actually manage more than a one line message saying "Suck my dick tonight" or "I want to make you my slut" to you single guys that put some thought into your messages,actually read profiles,and don't demand meets instantly and don't become abusive when you don't get the answer you wanted,thank you,it doesn't go unnoticed and your decency is appreciated,keep it up and you will find what you desire if you are patient enough.I've chatted to some lovely single men on here,so they definitely exist,it's just the idiots and dreamers unfortunately outnumber you and give you a bad rep xx"
appreciate what you're saying but I've wrote nice messages with a pic and it's just been deleted ! Purely because ' oh I've so many messages ' !
So don't worry OP you have to keep plodding on for the sake of the ' male army' lol |
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By *ouldyou2Man
over a year ago
west Midlands |
"The same person making the same negative remarks! If the site is that bad why are you still here? I'm truely interested!
Whilst being here as a single female (for over three years), have I had a meet in months? No I haven't...Am I complaining? No I'm not...
Is the caliber and the approach of men a low standard? To 'me' yes they are! So in that case I will then choose who I meet and who I wont, I just get so fed up of peoples attitudes, I'd just rather go without! But as they say'each to their own' So for the time being I will be going without! "
I'm here cos I choose to be and not dictated by influences ! I am not moaning I'm stating a fact ! |
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" but ain't they entitled to a chance ! "
...and herein gentlemen is the key to some of your problems! NO!!! You're NOT entitled to anything. Once some of you come to the realisation people are on site for their own hedonistic pleasure which might not include you, the happier you'll be. 
I only meet single men. I don't receive 100s of messages a day. I could reply to every message I receive but I don't. I receive about 10 messages a week. I've responded to ONE this year, we're meeting this week.
I have on my profile if you don't meet what I'm looking for: no reply. There is no ambiguity about the type of man I'm looking for. If my inbox is anything to go by I can just imagine how inundated some can get.
Be selective, don't take a scattergun approach, accept you won't float everyone's boat and avoid the negative, bitter, entitled attitude as displayed by some on this thread! |
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" but ain't they entitled to a chance !
...and herein gentlemen is the key to some of your problems! NO!!! You're NOT entitled to anything. Once some of you come to the realisation people are on site for their own hedonistic pleasure which might not include you, the happier you'll be.
I only meet single men. I don't receive 100s of messages a day. I could reply to every message I receive but I don't. I receive about 10 messages a week. I've responded to ONE this year, we're meeting this week.
I have on my profile if you don't meet what I'm looking for: no reply. There is no ambiguity about the type of man I'm looking for. If my inbox is anything to go by I can just imagine how inundated some can get.
Be selective, don't take a scattergun approach, accept you won't float everyone's boat and avoid the negative, bitter, entitled attitude as displayed by some on this thread! "
Oh, to add, the gentleman I'm meeting is unverified, been on site six weeks, has a basic profile but from the opening words I knew he'd read my profile, was able to capture my imagination, exuded confidence and lives down the road! |
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I will admit it (though I know you won't believe it of such a lovely, fluffy person) I can be harsh with the numpties who haven't bothered to read the words and who are deluded about what they think tall and muscular is.
But single men are in the majority on here so women and couples can not only state picky preferences but also stick to them and still get regular meets.
I am here for the single men. And if you either fit my preferences or are capable of sending a message which is friendly and pleasant then I am not going to he harsh. |
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