FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > I've Done A Complete Profile Rewrite - Feedback Welcome.
I've Done A Complete Profile Rewrite - Feedback Welcome.
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"It’s nice to see face pics. The profile has clearly had effort put in (which makes it better than the vast majority!) I’d consider adding more about what you do offer (there’s lots of stuff about what you’re not). Hobbies, passions, interests? But… and I think I’ve asked you this before on another of your threads… are you actually interested in swinging? It sounds like you’re looking for a one-to-one relationship (I know you briefly mentioned meeting a couple - is that something you actually want?). Dating sites are far easier than Fab. The advice you don’t want is the best advice available which is to go to clubs and events. I’ve seen your previous threads where you say you shouldn’t have to. You don’t have to, of course, but it’s the best route to success. " This 100%. I actually like the profile ha it made me laugh and smile. You have put thought into it definitely. I looking for one to one interactions which is absolutely fine everyone uses the site differently. I just think your going to find it incredibly hard that way. May I ask why this site and not say a vanilla site so to speak? | |||
"It’s nice to see face pics. The profile has clearly had effort put in (which makes it better than the vast majority!) I’d consider adding more about what you do offer (there’s lots of stuff about what you’re not). Hobbies, passions, interests? But… and I think I’ve asked you this before on another of your threads… are you actually interested in swinging? It sounds like you’re looking for a one-to-one relationship (I know you briefly mentioned meeting a couple - is that something you actually want?). Dating sites are far easier than Fab. The advice you don’t want is the best advice available which is to go to clubs and events. I’ve seen your previous threads where you say you shouldn’t have to. You don’t have to, of course, but it’s the best route to success. This 100%. I actually like the profile ha it made me laugh and smile. You have put thought into it definitely. Your looking for one to one interactions which is absolutely fine everyone uses the site differently. I just think your going to find it incredibly hard that way. May I ask why this site and not say a vanilla site so to speak? " | |||
"After 18 months on here with zero interest ,I thought it was time I updated my profile and do a full Rewrite,after reading advice in other threads I have posted . I would welcome any advice and opinions (and of course ,criticism). I have the skin of a Rhino ,so won't be offended . Thanks in advance . Dave " I'm obviously not your target demographic but I'd say it's a good profile. Didn't look at the pics, just read the biog. If your messages are in a similar vein you should have some success, albeit you'll still have to be patient. Or suck it up and do clubs and group socials. Good luck, I hope you find what you're looking for.  | |||
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"It's not your profile Dave, it's your attitude. " yep and as predicted just as the previous thread died a death a new one appears.
Dave for what it's worth I think your old profile was fine and actually probably better. This one sounds more negative. I suspect the issue is more about messages and how you interact rather than your profile per se which is fine. | |||
"It’s nice to see face pics. The profile has clearly had effort put in (which makes it better than the vast majority!) I’d consider adding more about what you do offer (there’s lots of stuff about what you’re not). Hobbies, passions, interests? But… and I think I’ve asked you this before on another of your threads… are you actually interested in swinging? It sounds like you’re looking for a one-to-one relationship (I know you briefly mentioned meeting a couple - is that something you actually want?). Dating sites are far easier than Fab. The advice you don’t want is the best advice available which is to go to clubs and events. I’ve seen your previous threads where you say you shouldn’t have to. You don’t have to, of course, but it’s the best route to success. " Thank you for your response and views . Many moons ago before I got married, and the last time I was single before now ,I met many couples for fun on a different site ,and would love the chance of doing the same again . But ,I'm going back 20 years . I am definitely not after a one to one relationship, but all the people I met last time around I met through messaging on the site ,them a phone chat ,then a one on one meet for a public social first. | |||
"After 18 months on here with zero interest ,I thought it was time I updated my profile and do a full Rewrite,after reading advice in other threads I have posted . I would welcome any advice and opinions (and of course ,criticism). I have the skin of a Rhino ,so won't be offended . Thanks in advance . Dave I'm obviously not your target demographic but I'd say it's a good profile. Didn't look at the pics, just read the biog. If your messages are in a similar vein you should have some success, albeit you'll still have to be patient. Or suck it up and do clubs and group socials. Good luck, I hope you find what you're looking for. "Thanks for the reply mate ,much appreciated. Clubs and group socials are my one red line ,they are definitely not for me . | |||
"It's much better. I'd remove the photos of you in your grey t-shirt. Your grimacing in them and your other photos are much better" Thanks for the feedback mate . I've git rid of them. | |||
"It's not your profile Dave, it's your attitude. yep and as predicted just as the previous thread died a death a new one appears.
Dave for what it's worth I think your old profile was fine and actually probably better. This one sounds more negative. I suspect the issue is more about messages and how you interact rather than your profile per se which is fine. "I don't send messages, as after a year of putting effort and time into messages ,and seeing them deleting unread I just gave up . | |||
"It’s nice to see face pics. The profile has clearly had effort put in (which makes it better than the vast majority!) I’d consider adding more about what you do offer (there’s lots of stuff about what you’re not). Hobbies, passions, interests? But… and I think I’ve asked you this before on another of your threads… are you actually interested in swinging? It sounds like you’re looking for a one-to-one relationship (I know you briefly mentioned meeting a couple - is that something you actually want?). Dating sites are far easier than Fab. The advice you don’t want is the best advice available which is to go to clubs and events. I’ve seen your previous threads where you say you shouldn’t have to. You don’t have to, of course, but it’s the best route to success. Thank you for your response and views . Many moons ago before I got married, and the last time I was single before now ,I met many couples for fun on a different site ,and would love the chance of doing the same again . But ,I'm going back 20 years . I am definitely not after a one to one relationship, but all the people I met last time around I met through messaging on the site ,them a phone chat ,then a one on one meet for a public social first. " The world has changed in 20 years. Why do you think doing what you did then is still the only way! I have noticed you joined in on a couple of posts with general chat. It was nice to see. But you have quickly reverted to type, unsurprisingly. No one is going to meet you because they feel sorry for you. You really are or already have committed fab suicide and I fear you will never get the chance of a meet as you are just too negative and self absorbed. | |||
"It's not your profile Dave, it's your attitude. yep and as predicted just as the previous thread died a death a new one appears.
Dave for what it's worth I think your old profile was fine and actually probably better. This one sounds more negative. I suspect the issue is more about messages and how you interact rather than your profile per se which is fine.
I don't send messages, as after a year of putting effort and time into messages ,and seeing them deleting unread I just gave up ."Hold on..........you won't go to clubs or group socials, and now you've given up messaging too? But you're frustrated at not meeting anyone..... | |||
" Hold on..........you won't go to clubs or group socials, and now you've given up messaging too? But you're frustrated at not meeting anyone..... " That’s Dave’s paradox! | |||
" Hold on..........you won't go to clubs or group socials, and now you've given up messaging too? But you're frustrated at not meeting anyone..... That’s Dave’s paradox! " Fair enough, I appreciate for me, messaging is never going to work, so I visit clubs and go to group socials. I totally understand why some avenues in the swinging world aren't for everyone, but to not use any of them.......  | |||
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" Hold on..........you won't go to clubs or group socials, and now you've given up messaging too? But you're frustrated at not meeting anyone..... That’s Dave’s paradox! Fair enough, I appreciate for me, messaging is never going to work, so I visit clubs and go to group socials. I totally understand why some avenues in the swinging world aren't for everyone, but to not use any of them....... "Yes this, now I an very confused lol. | |||
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"Your profile pic, I didn't know you were dark skinned??? All your other photos are showing a pale-skinned guy and all of a sudden, the profile pic is of a dark-skinned guy (and I don't think it's the lighting). Stealing photos is not going to get you what you're looking for. "  | |||
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"Your profile pic, I didn't know you were dark skinned??? All your other photos are showing a pale-skinned guy and all of a sudden, the profile pic is of a dark-skinned guy (and I don't think it's the lighting). Stealing photos is not going to get you what you're looking for. " That's a big accusation to throw around. For once I will defend Dave. If you look at Dec 15 pic then body is the same with lighter skin. Chest, nipples, shoulders the same - can't believe I've studied Dave's body so closely. It is either lighting, been in the sun or god forbid a bit of photo editing to change the which of course nobody every does on their pics  | |||
"Dave you can go to any weatherspoons in the country and see guys that look and dress like you, what makes you special? Why would a woman want to pick you over someone else? This site is all about people's fantasies, if you don't match up to anyone's fantasy you won't have any luck. Your photos are low resolution, dark and lack imagination. Your profile is really negative, I know you are joking but you don't come across as fun to be around. Time is precious and why would someone want to send time with you? Your profile maues you sound like you would just spend the whole time complaining how things arent they used to be... Just some thoughts!" I think this is a fun as it can get, still an improvement  | |||
"Your profile pic, I didn't know you were dark skinned??? All your other photos are showing a pale-skinned guy and all of a sudden, the profile pic is of a dark-skinned guy (and I don't think it's the lighting). Stealing photos is not going to get you what you're looking for. " That photo was taken in my shower ,where the lighting isn't as bright as elsewhere in my house of hot tub room. Feel free to do a Google search for that photo,it's mine. | |||
"Dave, putting aside the profile pic it’s a vast improvement . Humorous, candid + relaxed. Keep it up!" Thank you for your kind words. | |||
"Your profile pic, I didn't know you were dark skinned??? All your other photos are showing a pale-skinned guy and all of a sudden, the profile pic is of a dark-skinned guy (and I don't think it's the lighting). Stealing photos is not going to get you what you're looking for. That's a big accusation to throw around. For once I will defend Dave. If you look at Dec 15 pic then body is the same with lighter skin. Chest, nipples, shoulders the same - can't believe I've studied Dave's body so closely. It is either lighting, been in the sun or god forbid a bit of photo editing to change the which of course nobody every does on their pics "Thanks mate .The shower pic has been on my profile since I joined ,but was in friends only pics. The lighting in my shower room isn't the best. | |||
"Your profile pic, I didn't know you were dark skinned??? All your other photos are showing a pale-skinned guy and all of a sudden, the profile pic is of a dark-skinned guy (and I don't think it's the lighting). Stealing photos is not going to get you what you're looking for. That's a big accusation to throw around. For once I will defend Dave. If you look at Dec 15 pic then body is the same with lighter skin. Chest, nipples, shoulders the same - can't believe I've studied Dave's body so closely. It is either lighting, been in the sun or god forbid a bit of photo editing to change the which of course nobody every does on their pics
Thanks mate .The shower pic has been on my profile since I joined ,but was in friends only pics. The lighting in my shower room isn't the best. "No problem. I'm sure Miss Devil will back to apologise | |||
"Your profile pic, I didn't know you were dark skinned??? All your other photos are showing a pale-skinned guy and all of a sudden, the profile pic is of a dark-skinned guy (and I don't think it's the lighting). Stealing photos is not going to get you what you're looking for. That's a big accusation to throw around. For once I will defend Dave. If you look at Dec 15 pic then body is the same with lighter skin. Chest, nipples, shoulders the same - can't believe I've studied Dave's body so closely. It is either lighting, been in the sun or god forbid a bit of photo editing to change the which of course nobody every does on their pics
Thanks mate .The shower pic has been on my profile since I joined ,but was in friends only pics. The lighting in my shower room isn't the best.
No problem. I'm sure Miss Devil will back to apologise "*holds breath...... | |||
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"As others have said, it's not your profile that's the problem. In fact it has a couple of things that show you in a positive light, face pics being the one thing, and a sense of humour being the other. However... If you don't message people, and don't go to socials or clubs, how are you going to meet people? Whilst the profile us ok, it's average. There is nothing there that makes you stand out, and unfortunately, if anyone digs a little deeper and does some research on you, they might be put off by the negative attitude. The bottom line is, given your current approach, you will have zero success. If you hope to break the cycle of getting nowhere, then you have to change your approach, and, here I will sound like a stuck record, get out there and show your personality. What's the worst that could happen? You go to a social, chat with a few people, pick up a veri or two, hardly a bad night out is it? " Thank you for your feedback I appreciate it. Clubs and organised socials arnt for me ,BUT ,as I have said before I would love a one on one social in a public place for a coffee or bite to eat to see if there is a spark and attraction. I did use to message people that were looking for blokes in my age range, but they were always deleted unread, so I took the advice of someone on here who said "if you keep doing the same thing and getting the same results ,why continue "? And they were right , I messaged people ,got the same result everytine - messages were always deleted unread -,so I stopped sending messages . | |||
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"What's your area like for setting up a walking meet? Maybe with the dogs? " Great idea | |||
"As others have said, it's not your profile that's the problem. In fact it has a couple of things that show you in a positive light, face pics being the one thing, and a sense of humour being the other. However... If you don't message people, and don't go to socials or clubs, how are you going to meet people? Whilst the profile us ok, it's average. There is nothing there that makes you stand out, and unfortunately, if anyone digs a little deeper and does some research on you, they might be put off by the negative attitude. The bottom line is, given your current approach, you will have zero success. If you hope to break the cycle of getting nowhere, then you have to change your approach, and, here I will sound like a stuck record, get out there and show your personality. What's the worst that could happen? You go to a social, chat with a few people, pick up a veri or two, hardly a bad night out is it? Thank you for your feedback I appreciate it. Clubs and organised socials arnt for me ,BUT ,as I have said before I would love a one on one social in a public place for a coffee or bite to eat to see if there is a spark and attraction. I did use to message people that were looking for blokes in my age range, but they were always deleted unread, so I took the advice of someone on here who said "if you keep doing the same thing and getting the same results ,why continue "? And they were right , I messaged people ,got the same result everytine - messages were always deleted unread -,so I stopped sending messages . " I am now back thinking you are winding us up as you've ruled out all ways of meeting other than somebody messaging you. Perhaps that advice might apply to setting up threads asking for advice too? | |||
"As others have said, it's not your profile that's the problem. In fact it has a couple of things that show you in a positive light, face pics being the one thing, and a sense of humour being the other. However... If you don't message people, and don't go to socials or clubs, how are you going to meet people? Whilst the profile us ok, it's average. There is nothing there that makes you stand out, and unfortunately, if anyone digs a little deeper and does some research on you, they might be put off by the negative attitude. The bottom line is, given your current approach, you will have zero success. If you hope to break the cycle of getting nowhere, then you have to change your approach, and, here I will sound like a stuck record, get out there and show your personality. What's the worst that could happen? You go to a social, chat with a few people, pick up a veri or two, hardly a bad night out is it? Thank you for your feedback I appreciate it. Clubs and organised socials arnt for me ,BUT ,as I have said before I would love a one on one social in a public place for a coffee or bite to eat to see if there is a spark and attraction. I did use to message people that were looking for blokes in my age range, but they were always deleted unread, so I took the advice of someone on here who said "if you keep doing the same thing and getting the same results ,why continue "? And they were right , I messaged people ,got the same result everytine - messages were always deleted unread -,so I stopped sending messages . " "so I took the advice of someone on here who said "if you keep doing the same thing and getting the same results ,why continue "? So you stopped messaging, as it got you nowhere. But you constantly ask for advice on your profile, even though that gets you nowhere. You keep getting told the same thing... "Your profile will not get you meets"...yet you continue to try. People try to give you advise, but you keep saying "its not for me". Logically, if what you are trying doesnt work, surely you need to try something else?  | |||
"As others have said, it's not your profile that's the problem. In fact it has a couple of things that show you in a positive light, face pics being the one thing, and a sense of humour being the other. However... If you don't message people, and don't go to socials or clubs, how are you going to meet people? Whilst the profile us ok, it's average. There is nothing there that makes you stand out, and unfortunately, if anyone digs a little deeper and does some research on you, they might be put off by the negative attitude. The bottom line is, given your current approach, you will have zero success. If you hope to break the cycle of getting nowhere, then you have to change your approach, and, here I will sound like a stuck record, get out there and show your personality. What's the worst that could happen? You go to a social, chat with a few people, pick up a veri or two, hardly a bad night out is it? Thank you for your feedback I appreciate it. Clubs and organised socials arnt for me ,BUT ,as I have said before I would love a one on one social in a public place for a coffee or bite to eat to see if there is a spark and attraction. I did use to message people that were looking for blokes in my age range, but they were always deleted unread, so I took the advice of someone on here who said "if you keep doing the same thing and getting the same results ,why continue "? And they were right , I messaged people ,got the same result everytine - messages were always deleted unread -,so I stopped sending messages . " I suspect Einsteins defininition of madness assumes you will try doing something different rather than just stop trying. Good luck hope you find what you want | |||
"As others have said, it's not your profile that's the problem. In fact it has a couple of things that show you in a positive light, face pics being the one thing, and a sense of humour being the other. However... If you don't message people, and don't go to socials or clubs, how are you going to meet people? Whilst the profile us ok, it's average. There is nothing there that makes you stand out, and unfortunately, if anyone digs a little deeper and does some research on you, they might be put off by the negative attitude. The bottom line is, given your current approach, you will have zero success. If you hope to break the cycle of getting nowhere, then you have to change your approach, and, here I will sound like a stuck record, get out there and show your personality. What's the worst that could happen? You go to a social, chat with a few people, pick up a veri or two, hardly a bad night out is it? Thank you for your feedback I appreciate it. Clubs and organised socials arnt for me ,BUT ,as I have said before I would love a one on one social in a public place for a coffee or bite to eat to see if there is a spark and attraction. I did use to message people that were looking for blokes in my age range, but they were always deleted unread, so I took the advice of someone on here who said "if you keep doing the same thing and getting the same results ,why continue "? And they were right , I messaged people ,got the same result everytine - messages were always deleted unread -,so I stopped sending messages . I suspect Einsteins defininition of madness assumes you will try doing something different rather than just stop trying. Good luck hope you find what you want "And I suspect having the skin of a Rhino without the right permit could get you into trouble theses days | |||
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"I'll be 100% honest... Nothing is going to change. You can keep updating your profile, I mean this is probably the 3rd or 4th rewrite you've done since we joined fab. Reinvented an on line profile isn't going to up your chances if you're not willing to actually be a part of the swing community. I really, truly don't understand why you're still here and not using dating sites etc as they seem fat more suited to what you are actually looking for. " I'm not looking for dates ,or being on the dating scene . As I've previously said ,I would love a social meet ,but I'm not interested in group socials ,and but would love a one on one public social for a coffee or bite to eat. Not everyone is interested in group meets . Are you saying people only meet in group socials or clubs .? I have invested a lot of time and effort in my year and a half on here in messaging, updating my profile and participating in the forums ,something I wouldn't have done if this place wasn't for me. I read a lot of feedback on profiles ,and know people do meet for private socials, or fun through this site without going to organised socials or clubs . I have no idea if a year and a half on here without a meet,even a social meet , is viewed as perfectly normal for a single bloke ,or is viewed as a Red Flag , but I will persevere. Thanks for your comments, I appreciate them . | |||
" I'm not looking for dates ,or being on the dating scene . As I've previously said ,I would love a social meet ,but I'm not interested in group socials ,and but would love a one on one public social for a coffee or bite to eat. " I am curious how this differs from a date | |||
"I'll be 100% honest... Nothing is going to change. You can keep updating your profile, I mean this is probably the 3rd or 4th rewrite you've done since we joined fab. Reinvented an on line profile isn't going to up your chances if you're not willing to actually be a part of the swing community. I really, truly don't understand why you're still here and not using dating sites etc as they seem fat more suited to what you are actually looking for. I'm not looking for dates ,or being on the dating scene . As I've previously said ,I would love a social meet ,but I'm not interested in group socials ,and but would love a one on one public social for a coffee or bite to eat. Not everyone is interested in group meets . Are you saying people only meet in group socials or clubs .? I have invested a lot of time and effort in my year and a half on here in messaging, updating my profile and participating in the forums ,something I wouldn't have done if this place wasn't for me. I read a lot of feedback on profiles ,and know people do meet for private socials, or fun through this site without going to organised socials or clubs . I have no idea if a year and a half on here without a meet,even a social meet , is viewed as perfectly normal for a single bloke ,or is viewed as a Red Flag , but I will persevere. Thanks for your comments, I appreciate them ." Ofcourse they do but you're not managing to get meets on a private basis.. you're also not willing to change your tactics on this site so I can't see if happening for you. You want to be a part of a community that tbh sits on being social within said community. A profile rewrite, when your name and green arrow comes with negative connotations, is probably not going to garnish what you're looking for. So perhaps it's time to look elsewhere don't you think? There's also other swing platforms to consider. When you write a new post and alot of people see it and make the above comments, that's also very telling to new people on the site about how people perceive you. Tbf, as I said before, I'd personally delete the whole profile and start a fresh, remove the negativity behind the user name. It's not your profile thats a problem Dave though tbh this rewrite still reads as you putting yourself down alot regardless of it trying to be funny, I'm also not 100% sure if 50 year old women would like being called older models like yourself. | |||
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"Tbh pal, unless you are physically outstanding, it is going to be incredibly difficult to get a meet with a couple or female without visiting a club. Once you have those verifications, and know a couple of people who can vouch for you, things will progress. But if you really don't fancy a club, you're much better off on Plenty Of Fish or something similar " As a bald, speccy, chubby, 64 year old you might think I'd agree. I don't. Verifications are easy to come by if you put some effort in. | |||
"Tbh pal, unless you are physically outstanding, it is going to be incredibly difficult to get a meet with a couple or female without visiting a club. Once you have those verifications, and know a couple of people who can vouch for you, things will progress. But if you really don't fancy a club, you're much better off on Plenty Of Fish or something similar As a bald, speccy, chubby, 64 year old you might think I'd agree. I don't. Verifications are easy to come by if you put some effort in. " I didn't say verifications were hard to come by, I said meets with a couple or female were. I got almost nothing from this site until I ventured out to a club, then things got a bit better. I'm just glad I'm bi, men are so easy | |||
"Tbh pal, unless you are physically outstanding, it is going to be incredibly difficult to get a meet with a couple or female without visiting a club. Once you have those verifications, and know a couple of people who can vouch for you, things will progress. But if you really don't fancy a club, you're much better off on Plenty Of Fish or something similar " | |||
"Tbh pal, unless you are physically outstanding, it is going to be incredibly difficult to get a meet with a couple or female without visiting a club. Once you have those verifications, and know a couple of people who can vouch for you, things will progress. But if you really don't fancy a club, you're much better off on Plenty Of Fish or something similar As a bald, speccy, chubby, 64 year old you might think I'd agree. I don't. Verifications are easy to come by if you put some effort in. I didn't say verifications were hard to come by, I said meets with a couple or female were. I got almost nothing from this site until I ventured out to a club, then things got a bit better. I'm just glad I'm bi, men are so easy "If meets are hard to come by, so are meet verifications.  | |||
"T If meets are hard to come by, so are meet verifications. "Meet verifications are much easier to get than 1 on 1 meets. | |||
