Can all you helpful experienced swingers do me a little thread with useful definitions of interesting words that come up in swinging that I may not fully understand? Eg Hotwife, vixen, stag, ddom, cuck, brat… I think even “Slut” may mean something a little different than I understand it to mean in the vanilla world. Educate me…  |
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Anyone please feel free to correct me! But my understanding would be:
Hotwife - Married woman who is encouraged by her partner to meet other men, either with him or solo.
Vixen and stag - Couple who enjoy watching eachother with others for the pleasure their partner gets to experience. No humiliation involved.
Dom - Dominant partner (sometimes described as “domme” if female), wide spectrum of intensity.
Cuck - Voyeur partner observing who is also playing a humiliating role ie watching his partner with someone superior to him, bigger, more attractive etc, whilst he can’t join in or can only join in by cleaning up, filming or pleasuring either party.
Brat - Submissive who has a little “fight” in them, pushing their dom with resistance and sass in the context of the play. |
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"The jury is still out on “slut” as I know some people here really don’t like it. I however consider it a term of endearment 
To be honest, I don't like to use it. Just doesn't feel right to me."
Each to their own of course! I can only speak for myself personally - although I consider it overly familiar from a stranger and would only be happy to hear it from someone I know very well and who has permission. |
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(Adding on from the other list)
Hotwife - Married woman who is encouraged by her partner to meet other men, either with him or solo.
Vixen and stag - Couple who enjoy watching eachother with others for the pleasure their partner gets to experience. No humiliation involved.
Dom - Dominant partner (sometimes described as “domme” if female), wide spectrum of intensity. Used within a BDSM context commonly. Where power is exchanged through negotiation and consent. Someone's can be called a 'Top' where no power is exchanged just a physical interaction for example giving someone a spanking with no control over them.
Submissive - In the BDSM context, someone whom likes another to take control of them within a pre negotiated parameter and always with consent. Likes often vary from taking a submissive role in sex to being used a degraded, spanking or more extreme pain play - kinks are far and wide. (Other sub- labels of submissives are out there- Brat, little, sl@ve, prey, rope bunny, slut, doll, service etc) Sometimes can be called a 'bottom' when involved in an exchange that doesn't exchange power or control.
Switch- BDSM term for someone who can take both Dom and sub roles
Cuck - Voyeur partner observing who is also playing a humiliating role ie watching his partner with someone superior to him, bigger, more attractive etc, whilst he can’t join in or can only join in by cleaning up, filming or pleasuring either party.
Cuckquean- the wife of a man whom goes and has sex. She could like to be humiliated, or take pleasure in finding women for him to fuck. She doesn't get involved in sexual activity and maybe not present.
Cuckcake - in old school terms 'the mistress'- she is the woman a man in a couple would have sex with with consent from his wife/cuckquean.
Brat - Submissive who has a little “fight” in them, pushing their dom with resistance and sass in the context of the play.
Bull - a Male roll, the bull is often brought in to have sex with a 'cucks' partner or being even to have sex with the vixen or hotwife. Generally well hung with sexual experience
Gang bang- a woman having sex with 3+ men
Reverse Gang bang - A man having sex with 3+ women
Pineapple- well known symbol for swingers, upside down means the person is looking to meet other swingers. An old school symbol outside someone's house is pampas grass.
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By *ickD80Man
over a year ago
Wolverhampton |
Oooh others (but it's too late)
Dogging - when I drive to a secluded location with my partner, where there are other people who’ve also driven there and she opens the car door and welcomes other men to come and have sex with her while I watch and tells me to provide oral sex to the men there if they want it and then I lick her pussy clean after all the men have finished having sex with her.
Exhibitionist - when my partner tells me to wank while other people are watching me or when my partner fucks my ass with a strap on while other people are watching us or when my partner tells me to perform any sort of sexual act with people watching me.
Voyeur - when my partner makes me watch her having sex with men who are better looking than me and have bigger dicks than me and forbids me to be involved in any way.
Full swap - when my partner has sex with someone who’s in a relationship and gives me to that person’s partner for them to fuck me.
Soft swap - when my partner plays with someone who is in a relationship but doesn’t have penetrative sex and gives me to that person’s partner to use me in any way other than penetration. |
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"Oooh others (but it's too late)
Dogging - when I drive to a secluded location with my partner, where there are other people who’ve also driven there and she opens the car door and welcomes other men to come and have sex with her while I watch and tells me to provide oral sex to the men there if they want it and then I lick her pussy clean after all the men have finished having sex with her.
Exhibitionist - when my partner tells me to wank while other people are watching me or when my partner fucks my ass with a strap on while other people are watching us or when my partner tells me to perform any sort of sexual act with people watching me.
Voyeur - when my partner makes me watch her having sex with men who are better looking than me and have bigger dicks than me and forbids me to be involved in any way.
Full swap - when my partner has sex with someone who’s in a relationship and gives me to that person’s partner for them to fuck me.
Soft swap - when my partner plays with someone who is in a relationship but doesn’t have penetrative sex and gives me to that person’s partner to use me in any way other than penetration. "
Most of these are incorrect because you’ve just described them as they are specific to your relationship, lol. For example, your definition is voyeur is actually describing cuckolding. Same with dogging. The OP is looking for objective definitions, not reminiscing with one hand down your pants  |
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(Adding on from the other list)
Hotwife - Married woman who is encouraged by her partner to meet other men, either with him or solo.
Vixen and stag - Couple who enjoy watching eachother with others for the pleasure their partner gets to experience. No humiliation involved.
Dom - Dominant partner (sometimes described as “domme” if female), wide spectrum of intensity. Used within a BDSM context commonly. Where power is exchanged through negotiation and consent. Someone's can be called a 'Top' where no power is exchanged just a physical interaction for example giving someone a spanking with no control over them.
Submissive - In the BDSM context, someone whom likes another to take control of them within a pre negotiated parameter and always with consent. Likes often vary from taking a submissive role in sex to being used a degraded, spanking or more extreme pain play - kinks are far and wide. (Other sub- labels of submissives are out there- Brat, little, sl@ve, prey, rope bunny, slut, doll, service etc) Sometimes can be called a 'bottom' when involved in an exchange that doesn't exchange power or control.
Switch- BDSM term for someone who can take both Dom and sub roles
Cuck - Voyeur partner observing who is also playing a humiliating role ie watching his partner with someone superior to him, bigger, more attractive etc, whilst he can’t join in or can only join in by cleaning up, filming or pleasuring either party.
Cuckquean- the wife of a man whom goes and has sex. She could like to be humiliated, or take pleasure in finding women for him to fuck. She doesn't get involved in sexual activity and maybe not present.
Cuckcake - in old school terms 'the mistress'- she is the woman a man in a couple would have sex with with consent from his wife/cuckquean.
Brat - Submissive who has a little “fight” in them, pushing their dom with resistance and sass in the context of the play.
Bull - a Male roll, the bull is often brought in to have sex with a 'cucks' partner or being even to have sex with the vixen or hotwife. Generally well hung with sexual experience
Gang bang- a woman having sex with 3+ men
Reverse Gang bang - A man having sex with 3+ women
Pineapple- well known symbol for swingers, upside down means the person is looking to meet other swingers. An old school symbol outside someone's house is pampas grass.
Dogging - a sexual activity where usually strangers meet up outdoors for anonymous sexual activity. The perceived idea is a woman or perhaps couple arriving in a car and meeting single men.
Exhibitionist - where someone likes to be seen/ show off themselves. Doesn't necessarily have to be doing something sexual but an example of this could be having sex in a public area or wearing revealing clothes
Voyeur - where someone likes to look or watch other people. In a sexual sense this could be watching ppl fuck at a swingers club
Full swap - where 2 couples decide they will have penetrative sex with the other persons partner
Soft swap - where 2 couples decide they wish to swap partners but only for oral/ hands and not penetrative sex |
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Slut - for me if my Mr calls me HIS slut or uses the term when clearly in our Dom/sub roles it's HOT. Like.... "that's it baby, show me what a good slut you are"
But a randomer calling me that would make me cold and it feeling judgey
I feel the same as above for the term whore ..... BUT... I despise the term slag. Never ever ever call me that even from Mr.... yuck... NOOOO. I don't know why. Just hate it.
(Shows that we should always pre discuss and negotiate words if being derogatory)
K
X |
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"Slut - for me if my Mr calls me HIS slut or uses the term when clearly in our Dom/sub roles it's HOT. Like.... "that's it baby, show me what a good slut you are"
But a randomer calling me that would make me cold and it feeling judgey
I feel the same as above for the term whore ..... BUT... I despise the term slag. Never ever ever call me that even from Mr.... yuck... NOOOO. I don't know why. Just hate it.
(Shows that we should always pre discuss and negotiate words if being derogatory)
K
X"
Same for me! Slut and Whore preceded by “dirty little” = hot.
Slag = No, just No!
Mrs B x
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