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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Hey all you lovely lot.
So I've been on off here for a few months and like most men struggling ??. I've tried I few things in my first message and nothing seems to work?
Has anyone got any advice on what to say or ask?
Thank you in advance. X |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
Don't worry about message content anywhere near as much as you should worry about your profile.
Most women and couples will view a profile before opening a message.
Dull profiles with uninspiring photos and little to go on in profile text will mean messages get binned before being read.
Don't put the cart before the horse.
You could write the greatest opening message in history and it'll go unread because your profile doesn't interest someone.
A |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Compare it to applying for a job position.
All the clues of the role on offer is in the advert/profile (hopefully).
Read the profile, recognise what they're looking for and if you feel you could fill that role, apply, referencing how you feel your criteria's match.
In short, read their profile, if you feel you are a match, express what caught your eye and offer something to catch their eye. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Read the profile.
Short polite msg, saying why you're interested, attach a face pic.
Don't mention pizza, got fed up of seeing that on regular dating sites."
Pizza? Is that some kind of code? |
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By *nkyCplCouple
over a year ago
Northampton |
For us we make it pretty clear in our bio. If people haven’t read & followed it’s an instant delete.
Read the profile of peeps you want to engage with, don’t send anything overly crass/filthy, include recent face pics, be yourself and try pick up on the persons likes & dislikes. |
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"Compare it to applying for a job position.
All the clues of the role on offer is in the advert/profile (hopefully).
Read the profile, recognise what they're looking for and if you feel you could fill that role, apply, referencing how you feel your criteria's match.
In short, read their profile, if you feel you are a match, express what caught your eye and offer something to catch their eye."
Best advice ^^^
Definitely DONT go..... I see I don't fit (whatever criteria the person has) but thought I'd message 
K
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Personally we're happy with an introductory message that's a simple introduction. We're not arrogant enough to demand individual, carefully crafted first messages because we believe that its what comes after the opening communication that really counts.
Just be yourself. Good luck  |
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"Hey all you lovely lot.
So I've been on off here for a few months and like most men struggling ??. I've tried I few things in my first message and nothing seems to work?
Has anyone got any advice on what to say or ask?
Thank you in advance. X"
Solely from my perspective, most women will look at the profile before deciding to respond or even reading the message.
From my basic opinion, your profile is ...uninspiring. You talk about pictures twice in your bio but then you only have 1 photo that is public. Now I'm not saying to put your face like me but take anonymous photos that show your personality and character and your identity
Like, I like to change my hairstyle, I'm plus size. I like carnival and I like swimming. That you can tell from my pictures.
You also probably need some club/social verifications in person.
Again just my opinion. I could be talking complete claptrap for others but that's how my brain works. |
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