FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > When to call it a day?
When to call it a day?
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I'm doing a bit of soul searching as I'm approaching the grand old age of 51 in May and was wondering if maybe now is the time to bow out gracefully?
Trouble is for every con s to why there's three pro's as to why not.
On Fab 51 seems to be the death knell as most profiles age range top out generally at 40 or 50 but in a club where I tend to meet face to face people don't ask your age so it doesn’t matter.
I'm having too much fun to seriously stop right now but it did raise the question of when would be the right time.
What do you think is the right age? Is there one? |
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"Just go to clubs then. If you are a nice guy and know how to talk to people you'll have loads of fun. Meeting people off fab is hard work at the best of times "
That's what I do, I only meet at clubs not off Fab so it doesn't really matter but it got me thinking while I was surfing local updates and saw peoples age limits. |
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"No, but you do find yourself dropping out of folks filters as the years advance. Clubs work - as I've recently discovered  "
I only do club meets and fwb's not met off Fab for years so was just a hypothetical pondering tbh |
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"Nope their isn't one because given amount of people interested in the lifestyle the age just keeps going up as they get older "
I've noticed quite a lot of age limits are now 55 or 60 on some profiles where as when I joined here a long time ago 50 seemed like game over if you relied on getting meets off here. |
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"The good thing with technology and apps there are so many dating sites cantered for 40+ 50+ etc so many out there "
I guess that could be due to a lot more people getting divorced in their 40's and finding themselves single again maybe?  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'm doing a bit of soul searching as I'm approaching the grand old age of 51 in May and was wondering if maybe now is the time to bow out gracefully?
Trouble is for every con s to why there's three pro's as to why not.
On Fab 51 seems to be the death knell as most profiles age range top out generally at 40 or 50 but in a club where I tend to meet face to face people don't ask your age so it doesn’t matter.
I'm having too much fun to seriously stop right now but it did raise the question of when would be the right time.
What do you think is the right age? Is there one? "
BS I'm 64 and still get some meets.  |
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"I'm doing a bit of soul searching as I'm approaching the grand old age of 51 in May and was wondering if maybe now is the time to bow out gracefully?
Trouble is for every con s to why there's three pro's as to why not.
On Fab 51 seems to be the death knell as most profiles age range top out generally at 40 or 50 but in a club where I tend to meet face to face people don't ask your age so it doesn’t matter.
I'm having too much fun to seriously stop right now but it did raise the question of when would be the right time.
What do you think is the right age? Is there one? "
Interesting post , at 53 I’ve noticed the interest has disappeared for the last few years . I still enjoy the site but starting to wonder if I’m just browsing a “Kays catalogue “ ( yes now yoh know I’m not lying about my age  .
I’ve been to clubs but I suffer massive social anxiety , which is a huge shame as I’m very polite and well educated . |
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There isn't a right age. As the gambling ads say
'when the fun stops, stop'. 
If you're still meeting why stop?
Also just search profiles where you match their age requirements. Stops you looking in the cake shop window when it's closed |
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As you said in clubs people don’t generally ask ages and if they do like me it doesn’t matter I am 49 and I play with a 63 year old who can message me
But he comes to kestrels regularly and he’s a good friend and swinging partner when he can couple with me
I would say build a circle of friends at clubs together with your fab profile it goes hand in hand I think |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
When people start saying that interest drops off because they're a year or two older it always confuses me.
Are the people you were interested in 2 years ago not now 2 years older?
Does everyone else age at a different rate to you?
If you find yourself out of someone else's age range it either means you're now in someone else's or it means that those people uoure filtered out by haven't adjusted theirs as they get older.
Or is it because despite ageing yourself you're age preferences have remained the same? In which case it's as much your fault you're filtered out as theirs?
We all get older. You can either accept it or not.
A |
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"I'm doing a bit of soul searching as I'm approaching the grand old age of 51 in May and was wondering if maybe now is the time to bow out gracefully?
Trouble is for every con s to why there's three pro's as to why not.
On Fab 51 seems to be the death knell as most profiles age range top out generally at 40 or 50 but in a club where I tend to meet face to face people don't ask your age so it doesn’t matter.
I'm having too much fun to seriously stop right now but it did raise the question of when would be the right time.
What do you think is the right age? Is there one?
Interesting post , at 53 I’ve noticed the interest has disappeared for the last few years . I still enjoy the site but starting to wonder if I’m just browsing a “Kays catalogue “ ( yes now yoh know I’m not lying about my age .
I’ve been to clubs but I suffer massive social anxiety , which is a huge shame as I’m very polite and well educated . "
It was just a momentary feeling sorry for myself that I'm getting old moment. Having too much fun at the moment to stop swinging but set me wondering when is too old. |
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"There isn't a right age. As the gambling ads say
'when the fun stops, stop'.
If you're still meeting why stop?
Also just search profiles where you match their age requirements. Stops you looking in the cake shop window when it's closed"
Wasn't actually planning on giving up was just thinking about reaching 51 and the impact it has on here. At clubs I play every time I visit and age is never an issue talking to people face to face not over messages. As stated in other replies it just set me wondering about when I'd feel too old to still swing and wondered if other people my age had had that thought. |
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"As you said in clubs people don’t generally ask ages and if they do like me it doesn’t matter I am 49 and I play with a 63 year old who can message me
But he comes to kestrels regularly and he’s a good friend and swinging partner when he can couple with me
I would say build a circle of friends at clubs together with your fab profile it goes hand in hand I think "
In the clubs people take you for who you are based on what they see so it's a lot less fraught isn't it. |
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"There isn't a right age. As the gambling ads say
'when the fun stops, stop'.
If you're still meeting why stop?
Also just search profiles where you match their age requirements. Stops you looking in the cake shop window when it's closed
Wasn't actually planning on giving up was just thinking about reaching 51 and the impact it has on here. At clubs I play every time I visit and age is never an issue talking to people face to face not over messages. As stated in other replies it just set me wondering about when I'd feel too old to still swing and wondered if other people my age had had that thought. "
Well here I am at 66  |
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"Use the search tool and tick "people looking for my age"
Problem solved."
Don't have a problem meeting, I meet in clubs where my age isn't an issue. This was more a philosophical pondering of my impending age increase  |
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I dont think there's a tight or wrong age but if your having more luck in clubs than on here then I'd stick with clubs and ditch fab either all together or keep it just to stay upto date with events & nights in your area |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Nah, no need to call it a day, you just have to reframe your place in this world as you age. This applies to many things, not just recreational sex.
The landscape will change though, and you will need to change the way you think, and perhaps the type of people you want to meet.
There's also a pretty distinct cut off at 45 which I've noticed quite starkly so I've changed my viewpoint, and the type of people I contact.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Just go to clubs then. If you are a nice guy and know how to talk to people you'll have loads of fun. Meeting people off fab is hard work at the best of times "
Exactly this |
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By *os19Man
over a year ago
Edmonton |
I am 55 and I have thought of leaving Fabs as I was feeling a bit flat but over the last 18 months I have started to do the things I was doing before lockdown like attending socials , club and spa.I now feel a bit better so I am still
on Fabs. |
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Its obviously harder when you are older as there are less people here of a similar age or interested in meeting the 'more mature', but personally I've found there are a sufficient number who want to interact and meet to make it still a stimulating place to inhabit...good luck OP. |
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"I dont think there's a tight or wrong age but if your having more luck in clubs than on here then I'd stick with clubs and ditch fab either all together or keep it just to stay upto date with events & nights in your area "
That's pretty much all I do use it for tbh that and staying in touch with people and using the forums. |
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I have called it a day as to meeting as now rekindled a relationship..
However when I rejoined last year I only had one sexual meet that was great..
I want exclusive, not casual sex..
I had a fantastic time on here over the 4 years...
Just here for the forums now |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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51 is the new 41 OP.
I’m the same age as you. Actually I will be 52 in April. I was diagnosed with lymphoma in October . So maybe I should be thinking about slowing down or hanging up my gun and being put out to pasture.
Not a bit of it ! I feel more alive than ever. I stay physically fit and I’m truly embracing the lifestyle more than ever before.
It’s a cliche, I know, but age is just a number. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Depends what you want out of fab (or wherever you go for your kicks). If you're looking for younger people, you'll probably be limited by age filters - it's just a fact of life. But there are plenty of older people around, having fun. At 62 I'm still playing and still meeting on occasion, so there is certainly life after 50! Go for it! |
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