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Single guy
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Don't want to come across like I'm being a crying baby or pushy or needy. Not sure how this going to sound BUT. As a guy on here on my own I don't get any joy with connecting with woman or couples. I take the time to read Profiles and actually send messages that are not shity one liners and send cock photos. I try to make an effort in my messages cuz i want more then just a fuck and go. I can imagine woman and couples get loads of messages daily so how do I make myself stand out. Again I'm not being a pissy little girl who's not getting what he wants. I just want to understand all this. I'm new to it all. |
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Most people will look at your profile before deciding whether or not to read your message. Some people won't even bother looking at a profile that does not have a profile pic or does not have any public pics.
Your profile needs to put you in your best light aswell as your first message.
Ms x |
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By *sBlueWoman
over a year ago
Up North |
"Don't want to come across like I'm being a crying baby or pushy or needy. Not sure how this going to sound BUT. As a guy on here on my own I don't get any joy with connecting with woman or couples. I take the time to read Profiles and actually send messages that are not shity one liners and send cock photos. I try to make an effort in my messages cuz i want more then just a fuck and go. I can imagine woman and couples get loads of messages daily so how do I make myself stand out. Again I'm not being a pissy little girl who's not getting what he wants. I just want to understand all this. I'm new to it all. "
Ok you have no photos that’s why |
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Lack of photos gets an instant ignore from most people.
The silly disclaimer at the end always makes me think people are gullible and it's another reason to ignore for me and probably a few others.
Remember the amount of competition on here with single men castle outnumbering the women and couples. If someone gets 100 messages a day they'll be quickly filtering out based on things like a shadow instead of a profile picture and whatever criteria they have for themselves.
Put your best self forward. |
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First thing is obviously nail your profile. Second is to nail your opening messages. Now your set for success right.....?
Not exactly. You still have to factor out of the women and couples your intrested in people tend to have very subjective and thickle tastes. Also not all of us use fab for hooking up (me and My Girl generally hook up at clubs and nights out rather than make arrangements through our profile). Then factor how few women and couples there are in general.
So my point is even with a good profile and game it may not equal success (or at least any time soon). You are still you, an individual and never going to be everyone's cup of tea (granted some people have a more general appeal than others). So do the maths on the chances of you encountering someone who you totally foat each others boats when you are one man in an ocean of men? You do need to be realistic as to the extent this game is stacked against you.
So why bother? Well it's a perfectly reasonable proposition to leave (many have). But if your staying in game all you can do is put your best foot forward. And all round decent gents (I don't just mean guys who are nice or successful in their careers or dress well) tend to find their grove. And sometimes (as in my experience) you get more than you bargain for a meet your one on here. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear.  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear. "
had similar feed back to this about my profile lack ofcontent and pics of my appendage so i spent a week chopping and changing things taking new photos and putting my "junk" in private .. and its had zero effect.....
I think if ur going to geta meet in here pal its absolutr total luck u stubble across a lady thats interested in u unless ur some insta type model guy with pecks and abs and a chiveled jaw its pure pot luck
Edit!!! i wrote this reply then looked at fellwinters profike and low and beyold u see a slim toned six packed guy hmmmm point made
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear.
had similar feed back to this about my profile lack ofcontent and pics of my appendage so i spent a week chopping and changing things taking new photos and putting my "junk" in private .. and its had zero effect.....
I think if ur going to geta meet in here pal its absolutr total luck u stubble across a lady thats interested in u unless ur some insta type model guy with pecks and abs and a chiveled jaw its pure pot luck
Edit!!! i wrote this reply then looked at fellwinters profike and low and beyold u see a slim toned six packed guy hmmmm point made
"
Point well made but you'd be surprised how difficult it is. It's either a quick fuck message or people go cold. A lot of time wasting on this site.
Nothing different than going to a bar or a night club and getting rejected. Hurts more in real life but gives you thick skin and experience how to approach the next person differently.
You are better off going to swinger clubs and talking to people than sit and sulk how you aren't meeting anyone. Majority aren't including us.
Don't hate the player. Hate the game.
Nothing stopping you from going to the gym and sculpting your body.
In life there are moments where you realise that you need to take responsibility for your self and be the change that you need.
If you blame others rather than critically analyse every action and failure. Then you'll be in the same place all of your life thinking why the man next to you has fresh 20yo pussy on his breath rather than you.
Do something about it. If not, stay in your lane.  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Jesus fuck my life christ. I just asked for a little advice not get ripped apart. I'm dyslexic and mainly reply on my phones spell thingy to help me. I'm not very good and understanding how sentences are meant to be written. But you all get what I'm saying soooo. Thanks for your help and advice. |
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The second line of your profile tells me everything your not and moans about other men.
What you actually have to offer/ what your looking for is the last paragraph.
If it wasn’t for a forum I wouldn’t have made it that far.
Everyone’s here for their own benefit. What can you offer me the next single guy can’t? |
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"I will go over my bio again I look at spelling. Make sure all is correct.
Still hasn't bothered... lol"
I think the OP explained why in his comment just 4 minutes before yours. However, it is possible you missed his comment because you were typing yours at the same time. |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
Only suggestion I could say add loads of pictures if you need to keep your privacy crop face or taking from an angle. Arrange a social with no expectations put out meets for this and remember it can be competitive but can also be an easy ride and remember people are Human on here so treat them with respect be casual |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Jesus fuck my life christ. I just asked for a little advice not get ripped apart. I'm dyslexic and mainly reply on my phones spell thingy to help me. I'm not very good and understanding how sentences are meant to be written. But you all get what I'm saying soooo. Thanks for your help and advice. "
This reaction "Jesus fuck my life christ. I just asked for a little advice not get ripped apart" isn't taking criticism lightly. If you post on the forums asking advice on your profile and lack of messages or meets you have to expect the good and bad replies, spitting your dummy out has just alienated most who would've given you the time of day |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Go to clubs a few times even if it’s not your type of scene the verifications will help you get meets on here "
I have looked at a couple of clubs. Thinking if going to one |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying... |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It's highly unlikely anyone will request photos from you based on the one public one you have - do the profiles you approach only have one pic?"
Most of them don't to be fair. Thinking about it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying..."
Thank you for advice |
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"I will go over my bio again I look at spelling. Make sure all is correct.
Still hasn't bothered... lol
I think the OP explained why in his comment just 4 minutes before yours. However, it is possible you missed his comment because you were typing yours at the same time. "
I spell checked it for him. |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying..."
You would know this I suppose, having lived as a curvy woman? Or more likely, it's the same old casual fat bashing of women |
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"Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear.
had similar feed back to this about my profile lack ofcontent and pics of my appendage so i spent a week chopping and changing things taking new photos and putting my "junk" in private .. and its had zero effect.....
I think if ur going to geta meet in here pal its absolutr total luck u stubble across a lady thats interested in u unless ur some insta type model guy with pecks and abs and a chiveled jaw its pure pot luck
Edit!!! i wrote this reply then looked at fellwinters profike and low and beyold u see a slim toned six packed guy hmmmm point made
Point well made but you'd be surprised how difficult it is. It's either a quick fuck message or people go cold. A lot of time wasting on this site.
Nothing different than going to a bar or a night club and getting rejected. Hurts more in real life but gives you thick skin and experience how to approach the next person differently.
You are better off going to swinger clubs and talking to people than sit and sulk how you aren't meeting anyone. Majority aren't including us.
Don't hate the player. Hate the game.
Nothing stopping you from going to the gym and sculpting your body.
In life there are moments where you realise that you need to take responsibility for your self and be the change that you need.
If you blame others rather than critically analyse every action and failure. Then you'll be in the same place all of your life thinking why the man next to you has fresh 20yo pussy on his breath rather than you.
Do something about it. If not, stay in your lane. "
 |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying...
You would know this I suppose, having lived as a curvy woman? Or more likely, it's the same old casual fat bashing of women "
I'm single and looking for men not couples, so it would appear you are wrong, this isn't the case  |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't reply, photos are a little lame, and cheap boxers. Your profile write up is a little long winded too, didn't even read it all. Hope this helps "
But isn't this what we are meant to do. Write about ourselves in the best way possible. Most of the profiles I read are long and some of them are double the size of mine. I thought my bio was kinda small |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying..."
What an absolutely digusting thing to say…. About “if they are in the curvy category” 
ALL women (regardless of body type) can and have every right to be selective. FYI - women of the body type you mentioned get equal amount of attention (albeit unwanted) as their slimmer counterparts. Something tells me your feelings got hurt in what you’ve posted. |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying..."
And that post is why you will continue to wank your own cock forever. Total disrespect for women. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying...
And that post is why you will continue to wank your own cock forever. Total disrespect for women. "
I didn't realise how this message was wrote until you and other guy said about it. Yes I agree with the comment about curvy category. Any body type is beautiful. I'm not judgmental about womans looks or body. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Just want to say. It seems like I may have started a bit of a strong debate. Some things have been said that are not the best. I myself have said something inappropriate.
This is not what I intended. Just some advise and a little help. One woman has helped me with my bio which I appreciate. Also some good advise to from others. I want to apologise if I have offended anyone on here. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Don’t make much difference what you put - no one reads profiles anyway. You’ve got more chance of winning lottery than getting a good meet on here "
Couples read profiles. Single women do too. Some single men seem to skip the words and go straight to the pretty pictures of course, missing important details in the process, which generally results in them getting blocked.
Nobody is owed anything on here just for setting up a profile. If people aren't attracted to what they see they won't engage. Do the more stereotypically attractive guys have an easier ride? Of course they do, just as they will in a bar, pub or ordinary nightclub. Fab is no different.
Just because women and couples join looking for people to have sex with doesn't mean they'll settle for anyone.
It's no different to getting a vanilla date. You have to have something to offer and attract. If your profile or messages don't cut the mustard you've no chance. If your pictures are bland the same is true.
For anyone struggling online your best bet is an organised social or swingers club. It's your chance to showcase yourself in person, rather than from behind a screen. There's still no guarantees but you'll have a better chance than online for sure.
A
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
Correct mate "
Really? Plus the approach it all adds up. No effort wouldn't give you anything but some it's a beginning to something |
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal"
If the photos are crap, of course it makes no real difference. I seen a profile with the same cock pic uploaded 12 times...yup, not enticing at all. I just think jeez he's obsessed with that pic and is that's all he's offering to me...no thanks. As for bad spelling, I can't spell very well and rely on my phone to spell check for me so there's always help with this. For me it's about what the person what's to reveal/offer that might get me intrigued. For me it's the whole package. Usually it's what they say to me or they just don't meet my requirements put me off. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
If the photos are crap, of course it makes no real difference. I seen a profile with the same cock pic uploaded 12 times...yup, not enticing at all. I just think jeez he's obsessed with that pic and is that's all he's offering to me...no thanks. As for bad spelling, I can't spell very well and rely on my phone to spell check for me so there's always help with this. For me it's about what the person what's to reveal/offer that might get me intrigued. For me it's the whole package. Usually it's what they say to me or they just don't meet my requirements put me off."
Thank you. I will take on board what your saying. Trying to find the right photos of me isn't going well. Ov. I am being private though due to my job and people knowing me. I have come across a couple of people on here that I know. I haven't said anything to anyone that i know them. I'm just leaving them be. So that's why I'm having a little issue finding the right photos. Also my sexual preference I didn't think about them in that way. I do now. Thank you for advice. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Don’t make much difference what you put - no one reads profiles anyway. You’ve got more chance of winning lottery than getting a good meet on here
Couples read profiles. Single women do too. Some single men seem to skip the words and go straight to the pretty pictures of course, missing important details in the process, which generally results in them getting blocked.
Nobody is owed anything on here just for setting up a profile. If people aren't attracted to what they see they won't engage. Do the more stereotypically attractive guys have an easier ride? Of course they do, just as they will in a bar, pub or ordinary nightclub. Fab is no different.
Just because women and couples join looking for people to have sex with doesn't mean they'll settle for anyone.
It's no different to getting a vanilla date. You have to have something to offer and attract. If your profile or messages don't cut the mustard you've no chance. If your pictures are bland the same is true.
For anyone struggling online your best bet is an organised social or swingers club. It's your chance to showcase yourself in person, rather than from behind a screen. There's still no guarantees but you'll have a better chance than online for sure.
A
"
Your very true on this. Looking at this in that way as if I was in a night club is very good. To be fair I was shit in night clubs aswell. Lol. I couldn't pull a door open never mind a woman. Lol. Thank you |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
Correct mate
Really? Plus the approach it all adds up. No effort wouldn't give you anything but some it's a beginning to something "
Honestly I think I did alright with my profile. Says what I'm looking for and about myself. Think I need to redo my profile again. Take more time on it |
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From my experience, Fab is purely a gateway to other avenues of meeting someone and, like others have mentioned, you'll have greater (but not guaranteed!) success at swingers clubs and events, even if it's just to get your face/profile known and embedded in people's memories (ideally for the right reasons!).
If you rely on Fab for your meets, then you're just going to be left disappointed, especially as you're swimming in a pool overrun with other single guys, fakes, and very particular needs/requirements that make it difficult to make being on Fab feel worthwhile. But it's not impossible, even if it currently feels like it is! It's peaks and troughs.
You just need to find a balance between classy and debauchery when it comes to your profile; a respectful, well-spoken gentleman with sexy photos that leave something to the imagination will undoubtedly come across more appealing than most on Fab.
On top of this, displaying a good sense of humour sure helps, even if it's just for respite from the monotony, repeated rejections, and huge amounts of effort needed to achieve your goal(s) as a single bloke. Just remember that you need to be a good nob, not a pretentious nobhead! 
Good luck! |
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
If the photos are crap, of course it makes no real difference. I seen a profile with the same cock pic uploaded 12 times...yup, not enticing at all. I just think jeez he's obsessed with that pic and is that's all he's offering to me...no thanks. As for bad spelling, I can't spell very well and rely on my phone to spell check for me so there's always help with this. For me it's about what the person what's to reveal/offer that might get me intrigued. For me it's the whole package. Usually it's what they say to me or they just don't meet my requirements put me off.
Thank you. I will take on board what your saying. Trying to find the right photos of me isn't going well. Ov. I am being private though due to my job and people knowing me. I have come across a couple of people on here that I know. I haven't said anything to anyone that i know them. I'm just leaving them be. So that's why I'm having a little issue finding the right photos. Also my sexual preference I didn't think about them in that way. I do now. Thank you for advice. "
I definitely don't want people from work knowing I'm on here. You can always send photos of yourself in first messages and most photos wouldn't really indicate who you are unless you normally walk around naked?? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
If the photos are crap, of course it makes no real difference. I seen a profile with the same cock pic uploaded 12 times...yup, not enticing at all. I just think jeez he's obsessed with that pic and is that's all he's offering to me...no thanks. As for bad spelling, I can't spell very well and rely on my phone to spell check for me so there's always help with this. For me it's about what the person what's to reveal/offer that might get me intrigued. For me it's the whole package. Usually it's what they say to me or they just don't meet my requirements put me off.
Thank you. I will take on board what your saying. Trying to find the right photos of me isn't going well. Ov. I am being private though due to my job and people knowing me. I have come across a couple of people on here that I know. I haven't said anything to anyone that i know them. I'm just leaving them be. So that's why I'm having a little issue finding the right photos. Also my sexual preference I didn't think about them in that way. I do now. Thank you for advice.
I definitely don't want people from work knowing I'm on here. You can always send photos of yourself in first messages and most photos wouldn't really indicate who you are unless you normally walk around naked?? "
I always send a clean face photo of me when I message people. I have been talking to a couple of woman but convo going Ok at first then they just stop messaging. Not sure why. Iv just being going through my profile again. Trying to make it more appealing again. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I hear you brother! Join the club!
This site can make or break a single striaght guy I tell you!
Best of going clubs. It is far easier to engage in person than trying to get your message to fit in a women inbox on this site which probably gets battered with over 50 messages a day!
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
If the photos are crap, of course it makes no real difference. I seen a profile with the same cock pic uploaded 12 times...yup, not enticing at all. I just think jeez he's obsessed with that pic and is that's all he's offering to me...no thanks. As for bad spelling, I can't spell very well and rely on my phone to spell check for me so there's always help with this. For me it's about what the person what's to reveal/offer that might get me intrigued. For me it's the whole package. Usually it's what they say to me or they just don't meet my requirements put me off.
Thank you. I will take on board what your saying. Trying to find the right photos of me isn't going well. Ov. I am being private though due to my job and people knowing me. I have come across a couple of people on here that I know. I haven't said anything to anyone that i know them. I'm just leaving them be. So that's why I'm having a little issue finding the right photos. Also my sexual preference I didn't think about them in that way. I do now. Thank you for advice.
I definitely don't want people from work knowing I'm on here. You can always send photos of yourself in first messages and most photos wouldn't really indicate who you are unless you normally walk around naked??
I always send a clean face photo of me when I message people. I have been talking to a couple of woman but convo going Ok at first then they just stop messaging. Not sure why. Iv just being going through my profile again. Trying to make it more appealing again. "
I get like 10 guys a day I start conversations with, but mostly all lead to nothing as it's usually they said something that turned me off and I move on |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Mate I do alright copy mine fuck it even nick my pictures you won't be the first or last probably "
Wow thank you for offer but I want this to be all me. This is something I'm serious about. I'm new to all this and what to progress on my own effort. But I have looked over your profile and it's good. But one thing though. Someone on this forum has said that my bio was to long ( I have just shortened it though) and they said that would put people off. They didn't finish reading it to long. Your bio is longer then mine was and you clearly are doing great. So is it they way I'm talking or it generally don't matter. Cuz alot of people have very different opinions of why my profile won't attract. But my photos are defo one of them |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I hear you brother! Join the club!
This site can make or break a single striaght guy I tell you!
Best of going clubs. It is far easier to engage in person than trying to get your message to fit in a women inbox on this site which probably gets battered with over 50 messages a day!
"
That so true. 50 is being kind aswell . |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
If the photos are crap, of course it makes no real difference. I seen a profile with the same cock pic uploaded 12 times...yup, not enticing at all. I just think jeez he's obsessed with that pic and is that's all he's offering to me...no thanks. As for bad spelling, I can't spell very well and rely on my phone to spell check for me so there's always help with this. For me it's about what the person what's to reveal/offer that might get me intrigued. For me it's the whole package. Usually it's what they say to me or they just don't meet my requirements put me off.
Thank you. I will take on board what your saying. Trying to find the right photos of me isn't going well. Ov. I am being private though due to my job and people knowing me. I have come across a couple of people on here that I know. I haven't said anything to anyone that i know them. I'm just leaving them be. So that's why I'm having a little issue finding the right photos. Also my sexual preference I didn't think about them in that way. I do now. Thank you for advice.
I definitely don't want people from work knowing I'm on here. You can always send photos of yourself in first messages and most photos wouldn't really indicate who you are unless you normally walk around naked??
I always send a clean face photo of me when I message people. I have been talking to a couple of woman but convo going Ok at first then they just stop messaging. Not sure why. Iv just being going through my profile again. Trying to make it more appealing again.
I get like 10 guys a day I start conversations with, but mostly all lead to nothing as it's usually they said something that turned me off and I move on"
Ok fair point. Would you tell the guy or just not message anymore. Sorry for asking I'm just learning about this life. I understand being turned off with one word. |
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"Mate I do alright copy mine fuck it even nick my pictures you won't be the first or last probably
Wow thank you for offer but I want this to be all me. This is something I'm serious about. I'm new to all this and what to progress on my own effort. But I have looked over your profile and it's good. But one thing though. Someone on this forum has said that my bio was to long ( I have just shortened it though) and they said that would put people off. They didn't finish reading it to long. Your bio is longer then mine was and you clearly are doing great. So is it they way I'm talking or it generally don't matter. Cuz alot of people have very different opinions of why my profile won't attract. But my photos are defo one of them"
You write however you want your profile to read. The right person will be happy enough with whatever you have written. My profile really long but I don't give two hoots but maybe I just don't need help getting attention. Men message me regardless of what i written or my photos. I have only one pic and still get 100s of messages. It's totally different for men though. Just decent bio, 4 or 5 decent photos and good chat always help |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Mate I do alright copy mine fuck it even nick my pictures you won't be the first or last probably
Wow thank you for offer but I want this to be all me. This is something I'm serious about. I'm new to all this and what to progress on my own effort. But I have looked over your profile and it's good. But one thing though. Someone on this forum has said that my bio was to long ( I have just shortened it though) and they said that would put people off. They didn't finish reading it to long. Your bio is longer then mine was and you clearly are doing great. So is it they way I'm talking or it generally don't matter. Cuz alot of people have very different opinions of why my profile won't attract. But my photos are defo one of them
You write however you want your profile to read. The right person will be happy enough with whatever you have written. My profile really long but I don't give two hoots but maybe I just don't need help getting attention. Men message me regardless of what i written or my photos. I have only one pic and still get 100s of messages. It's totally different for men though. Just decent bio, 4 or 5 decent photos and good chat always help"
Thank you for your advise. Helps. And yes I can imagine you get more message then you can read. |
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
Correct mate
Really? Plus the approach it all adds up. No effort wouldn't give you anything but some it's a beginning to something
Honestly I think I did alright with my profile. Says what I'm looking for and about myself. Think I need to redo my profile again. Take more time on it"
Sorry about the dyslexia. I'm neurodivergent but I went to uni that helped me with formatting and making things easier to read.
The geek that I am, I word-counted my statement, put in headings and used Grammarly on my laptop. I use my face because I don't really care what my job/family/friends think about my being on a swinging site. It's no different to my Tinder profile.
I can't get on with the phone to be honest. I do most of my writing on the laptop.
You can see how I have set up my profile bio. It does read like a CV but that works for my brain. It's 250 words which to be fair is a bit long but people can skip out bits and read which bits they want by heading.
There is also a bit about keeping it neutral.
After you have done that, then maybe you need to hand out more in clubs and socials in your area and get to know more people on the scene. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
Correct mate
Really? Plus the approach it all adds up. No effort wouldn't give you anything but some it's a beginning to something
Honestly I think I did alright with my profile. Says what I'm looking for and about myself. Think I need to redo my profile again. Take more time on it
Sorry about the dyslexia. I'm neurodivergent but I went to uni that helped me with formatting and making things easier to read.
The geek that I am, I word-counted my statement, put in headings and used Grammarly on my laptop. I use my face because I don't really care what my job/family/friends think about my being on a swinging site. It's no different to my Tinder profile.
I can't get on with the phone to be honest. I do most of my writing on the laptop.
You can see how I have set up my profile bio. It does read like a CV but that works for my brain. It's 250 words which to be fair is a bit long but people can skip out bits and read which bits they want by heading.
There is also a bit about keeping it neutral.
After you have done that, then maybe you need to hand out more in clubs and socials in your area and get to know more people on the scene."
neurodivergent. I never heard of it. Ya clubs seem to be the way forward. |
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"I'm not being a pissy little girl"
It might not bother many people but this kind of language will bother some, us for instance. It’s a bit misogynistic to equate whining about not getting what you want with being a girl.
Women and couples (specifically the women in the couples!) have all the power on here, it’s not the real world, so you have to not only stand out but also do as little as possible to offend.
Good luck, it’s hard work. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Define your meaning on the use of the word "misogynistic"
Are you hearing this due to the word being used on the number one influencer in the world "Andrew Tate"?
|
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"Define your meaning on the use of the word "misogynistic"
Are you hearing this due to the word being used on the number one influencer in the world "Andrew Tate"?
"
Gosh no, I’ve been aware of misogynists for a long time.
A misogynist is a person who has a hatred or strong dislike of women.
Misogynistic behaviour can range from violence and threats against women to perpetuating inequality between men and women. Holding opinions such as people who complain are ‘pissy girls’ when in fact both men and women complain, and neither more than the other, is misogynistic.
The remark may not have been intended in that way but then it’s an example of how deeply ingrained misogyny is in society. |
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By *bi HaiveMan
over a year ago
Forum Mod Cheeseville, Somerset |
"Define your meaning on the use of the word "misogynistic"
Are you hearing this due to the word being used on the number one influencer in the world "Andrew Tate"?
"
Number one influencer.... 
Lolz. 
A |
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"Don't want to come across like I'm being a crying baby or pushy or needy. Not sure how this going to sound BUT. As a guy on here on my own I don't get any joy with connecting with woman or couples. I take the time to read Profiles and actually send messages that are not shity one liners and send cock photos. I try to make an effort in my messages cuz i want more then just a fuck and go. I can imagine woman and couples get loads of messages daily so how do I make myself stand out. Again I'm not being a pissy little girl who's not getting what he wants. I just want to understand all this. I'm new to it all. "
Go to a club and get some verifications 1st |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Well with over 12 billion views and Elon Musk messing directly with him over twitter makes me laugh. He Luton lad. I am originally from MK so funny see someone close become big.
Sadly I understand he in prison for 30 days and had 11 cars taken off him. Pretty sure he will soon fall down the ranks but geezer worth 500 million. I take my hat off to him.
Wonder if one day we might see him in one of our local clubs haha. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"I'm not being a pissy little girl
It might not bother many people but this kind of language will bother some, us for instance. It’s a bit misogynistic to equate whining about not getting what you want with being a girl.
Women and couples (specifically the women in the couples!) have all the power on here, it’s not the real world, so you have to not only stand out but also do as little as possible to offend.
Good luck, it’s hard work."
Ok thank you for pointing that out. No I didn't intended it to sound bad. Just a comment. Your advise is helpful |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Don't want to come across like I'm being a crying baby or pushy or needy.
Too late"
Ya I'm getting that. Should have started this completely different. But it's done now. But getting some good advise. |
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"Well with over 12 billion views and Elon Musk messing directly with him over twitter makes me laugh. He Luton lad. I am originally from MK so funny see someone close become big.
Sadly I understand he in prison for 30 days and had 11 cars taken off him. Pretty sure he will soon fall down the ranks but geezer worth 500 million. I take my hat off to him.
Wonder if one day we might see him in one of our local clubs haha. "
Is he from Luton?? |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying..."
Wtf!
What a horrible post
Are you not getting enough!?
|
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"Can I jump in here and ask what you fancy people think of mine "
It's rude to jump on someone else's post.. if you seek advice there's plenty on the forum if you search
Or make your own
Though any small amount of logic could point you in the same direction of issues...
Photos and blurb
Your profile is your shop window
|
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Well with over 12 billion views and Elon Musk messing directly with him over twitter makes me laugh. He Luton lad. I am originally from MK so funny see someone close become big.
Sadly I understand he in prison for 30 days and had 11 cars taken off him. Pretty sure he will soon fall down the ranks but geezer worth 500 million. I take my hat off to him.
Wonder if one day we might see him in one of our local clubs haha.
Is he from Luton??"
Yep. Born in America and came to England when 4 and grew up in Luton. I know the area too. Rubbish area, horrible which why I say fair play to him. No matter what anyone says we would all love to have his jet set lifestyle just the end part of ending up in prison. If that was the case then I stick with my happy life lol |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying..."
What a disgusting comment. You couldn’t be more wrong. I put myself in the ‘curvy’ category and certainly don’t have any shortage of offers on Fab or in ‘real’ life. |
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Having looked at yours. Your first picture I saw was a dick pic which I find a total turn off so I would be likely to lose interest. When you go further you do have some nice pictures but the dick pic spoils it. |
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"Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear.
had similar feed back to this about my profile lack ofcontent and pics of my appendage so i spent a week chopping and changing things taking new photos and putting my "junk" in private .. and its had zero effect.....
I think if ur going to geta meet in here pal its absolutr total luck u stubble across a lady thats interested in u unless ur some insta type model guy with pecks and abs and a chiveled jaw its pure pot luck
Edit!!! i wrote this reply then looked at fellwinters profike and low and beyold u see a slim toned six packed guy hmmmm point made
"
Having looked at yours. Your first picture I saw was a dick pic which I find a total turn off so I would be likely to lose interest. When you go further you do have some nice pictures but the dick pic spoils it. |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying..."
As a single woman who has been on fab many years this has got to be the most insulting comment I have ever seen on here. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying...
As a single woman who has been on fab many years this has got to be the most insulting comment I have ever seen on here. "
I really am sorry for this. Wish I could delete it. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear.
had similar feed back to this about my profile lack ofcontent and pics of my appendage so i spent a week chopping and changing things taking new photos and putting my "junk" in private .. and its had zero effect.....
I think if ur going to geta meet in here pal its absolutr total luck u stubble across a lady thats interested in u unless ur some insta type model guy with pecks and abs and a chiveled jaw its pure pot luck
Edit!!! i wrote this reply then looked at fellwinters profike and low and beyold u see a slim toned six packed guy hmmmm point made
Having looked at yours. Your first picture I saw was a dick pic which I find a total turn off so I would be likely to lose interest. When you go further you do have some nice pictures but the dick pic spoils it."
Thank you for advice. I was in to minds to put it public or not. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Having looked at yours. Your first picture I saw was a dick pic which I find a total turn off so I would be likely to lose interest. When you go further you do have some nice pictures but the dick pic spoils it. "
Can I ask what photos you see when you look at my profile. That dick pic you shouldn't have been able to see actually. Just went to change it from public and it was friends only pic |
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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough / Stamford |
"Can someone check my profile out and give me some advice on how i can make it more attractive. All reply and advice gladly received. Thankyou"
Bad form to jump on someone else's post. Suggest starting your own if you can't find help in the many, many profile review threads.
(Bry) |
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By *ohn KanakaMan
over a year ago
Not all that North of North London |
"I'm not being a pissy little girl
It might not bother many people but this kind of language will bother some, us for instance. It’s a bit misogynistic to equate whining about not getting what you want with being a girl.
Women and couples (specifically the women in the couples!) have all the power on here, it’s not the real world, so you have to not only stand out but also do as little as possible to offend.
Good luck, it’s hard work."
I'm glad soneone else picked up on this. There were a couple of termd in the opening post that were huge red flags abd I did wonder how these might reflect how the OP communicates generally |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear.
had similar feed back to this about my profile lack ofcontent and pics of my appendage so i spent a week chopping and changing things taking new photos and putting my "junk" in private .. and its had zero effect.....
I think if ur going to geta meet in here pal its absolutr total luck u stubble across a lady thats interested in u unless ur some insta type model guy with pecks and abs and a chiveled jaw its pure pot luck
Edit!!! i wrote this reply then looked at fellwinters profike and low and beyold u see a slim toned six packed guy hmmmm point made
Having looked at yours. Your first picture I saw was a dick pic which I find a total turn off so I would be likely to lose interest. When you go further you do have some nice pictures but the dick pic spoils it.
Thank you for advice. I was in to minds to put it public or not. "
God that was brutal! You can be honest but don’t have to be mean and ripp people to shreds!
I think your profile is good. Just be yourself and have fun. |
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Ha i don't think single ladies and couples have all the power on fab... otherwise we get decent men messaging us! And everyone is happy. Instead, most men come across arrogant, needy or sleazy so obviously no power over them to manage the social mannerisms on fab. |
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"I hear you brother! Join the club!
This site can make or break a single striaght guy I tell you!
Best of going clubs. It is far easier to engage in person than trying to get your message to fit in a women inbox on this site which probably gets battered with over 50 messages a day!
"
I used to get over 300 a day when i first joined fab. That's your competition. But majority messages are written by either fantasists or people you really should avoid meeting. Alot people on here experienced abusive meets because of the nature of some fabbers . But unfortunately other fabbers can't be informed of this. |
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By *8v3nCouple
over a year ago
Coventry |
"Ha i don't think single ladies and couples have all the power on fab... otherwise we get decent men messaging us! And everyone is happy. Instead, most men come across arrogant, needy or sleazy so obviously no power over them to manage the social mannerisms on fab. "
Oh I can second that. And here's a thing fabs is not a replacement of tinder. If one is here cause fails to get traction on tinder and likes ot makes poor impression in social meets then fabs may be even harsher. |
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"Believe me adding pictures having a long profile a short profile makes no difference pal
Correct mate
Really? Plus the approach it all adds up. No effort wouldn't give you anything but some it's a beginning to something
Honestly I think I did alright with my profile. Says what I'm looking for and about myself. Think I need to redo my profile again. Take more time on it
Sorry about the dyslexia. I'm neurodivergent but I went to uni that helped me with formatting and making things easier to read.
The geek that I am, I word-counted my statement, put in headings and used Grammarly on my laptop. I use my face because I don't really care what my job/family/friends think about my being on a swinging site. It's no different to my Tinder profile.
I can't get on with the phone to be honest. I do most of my writing on the laptop.
You can see how I have set up my profile bio. It does read like a CV but that works for my brain. It's 250 words which to be fair is a bit long but people can skip out bits and read which bits they want by heading.
There is also a bit about keeping it neutral.
After you have done that, then maybe you need to hand out more in clubs and socials in your area and get to know more people on the scene.
neurodivergent. I never heard of it. Ya clubs seem to be the way forward. "
Google it.... most people think it's a mental health or learning difficulty thing but it's more about how your brain processes and interprets information which is different from the average. Also if a neurologist looked at your brain scans they would be different from the average aka neurotypical person. |
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"So apart from a lack of pics, which mean most messages will get an instant delete, most single women on here are on to meet other women, usually with couples, to discover their bi side. They rarely need to come on here to get a ride, unless they are in the "curvy" category. Just saying...
As a single woman who has been on fab many years this has got to be the most insulting comment I have ever seen on here.
I really am sorry for this. Wish I could delete it. "
I missed this one but I miss a lot.
This comes across as
1. all women are bi
2. all women are fat/unattractive
That's why no one will have sex with me.
Then I check the profile and it's an older man in the 14th largest town in Scotland with zero verifications.
Here I am a curvy cis-hetero straight woman and would I be falling over myself to have sex with this guy? Nope.
I like living in a big city..while I may make the trek to Glasgow or Edinburgh. . Kilmarnock as wonderful as it might be is not on my bucket list.
This is where this man's mindset is and that is where I will leave it. A Boomer in the Scottish Lowlands.
My parents are Boomers who live on a tropical island and I've never heard them speak about people in this way. But then again my parents are not bitter people. Same with one of my best friends in London, She's 60 and one of the nicest and most liberal and non-judgemental people I've met. |
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"I hear you brother! Join the club!
This site can make or break a single striaght guy I tell you!
Best of going clubs. It is far easier to engage in person than trying to get your message to fit in a women inbox on this site which probably gets battered with over 50 messages a day!
I used to get over 300 a day when i first joined fab. That's your competition. But majority messages are written by either fantasists or people you really should avoid meeting. Alot people on here experienced abusive meets because of the nature of some fabbers . But unfortunately other fabbers can't be informed of this."
Yup. Like 100 messages a day from all kinds of unsuitable men.
I did a little test with a previous meet. He showed me his fab and I showed him mine.
I found over 300 men in my 5 mile search area and he found only 134 women. let say half of those women are not attracted to him or he's not attracted to them. That's 67. then let's say half of those 67 do not reply to his messages. That's estimated 34 who respond. Not let's say half of those 34 do not like his personality in the messages they receive. That's 17. Now imagine half of those 17 are too busy with work/family life to actually meet because life happens. That's estimated 9 women in a 5 mile radius. And this is London! Meanwhile, the women have to choose between hundreds of men. So the competition is steep.
My FWB said that women control access to sex and men control access to relationships. That's why sex worker industry is still going strong. And less people are getting married.
It's not better in the clubs as there is always more men than women in every club I've ever been to.
The smart men find out what women like and put themselves in a position to be noticed for the things women like.
Like I can go on pics page and see which straight men are most fabbed and if they live near me, message them. Those guys didn't even have to message me. They just put themselves in a position to be messaged. Same in the clubs. Some guys go and hug the wall. Some guys engage in conversation and offer to buy a woman a drink. Guess who is going to get sexual interaction.
As for abusers, I read a lot of books and watch a lot of documentaries on how to avoid people who are like that. Especially on the internet. I suggest everyone else does the same. Don't look like easy prey. |
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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough / Stamford |
"say half of those women are not attracted to him or he's not attracted to them."
Another forum regular has a great phrase: "most people don't fancy most other people". I think your half estimate should be closer to 10%, possibly even lower.
In all honesty, if we couldn't find guys for Char that are better looking, better built or better performing that me, we wouldn't bother.
(Bry) |
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By *jonesMan
over a year ago
Plymouth |
"Don’t make much difference what you put - no one reads profiles anyway. You’ve got more chance of winning lottery than getting a good meet on here
Couples read profiles. Single women do too. Some single men seem to skip the words and go straight to the pretty pictures of course, missing important details in the process, which generally results in them getting blocked.
Nobody is owed anything on here just for setting up a profile. If people aren't attracted to what they see they won't engage. Do the more stereotypically attractive guys have an easier ride? Of course they do, just as they will in a bar, pub or ordinary nightclub. Fab is no different.
Just because women and couples join looking for people to have sex with doesn't mean they'll settle for anyone.
It's no different to getting a vanilla date. You have to have something to offer and attract. If your profile or messages don't cut the mustard you've no chance. If your pictures are bland the same is true.
For anyone struggling online your best bet is an organised social or swingers club. It's your chance to showcase yourself in person, rather than from behind a screen. There's still no guarantees but you'll have a better chance than online for sure.
A
"
Go to an organised social ...it should be sent in big bold letters to every gent that signs up on fab ...
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
So this post has really gained some attention. Not sure if that's in a good way or bad way but it's getting people talking with there opinions and advise. I do Appreciate all the advise I'm getting and it is helping. I did start of not understand what I posted but I do know. I'm all new to this world and learning every day. Thank you every one |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Lack of photos. Terrible spelling. Wrote your bio not knowing when to start or end a sentence. Just an overall mess.
In my opinion. Have a full frontal picture without your junk, maybe a partially hand over it for some mystery.
Almost never look at a profile if the 1st thing we see is a cock pic.
Improve your spelling. Don't be a little bitch and upload a few quality photos and you are already better off than majority.
Currently looks like barely any effort was put into your profile. Don't expect anyone to put effort into replying if you present lack of.
It's a player vs player game. If you don't display yourself well. Someone else will and sure enough that piece of hot ass you have on your hot list. Will be moaning in some other dudes ear.
had similar feed back to this about my profile lack ofcontent and pics of my appendage so i spent a week chopping and changing things taking new photos and putting my "junk" in private .. and its had zero effect.....
I think if ur going to geta meet in here pal its absolutr total luck u stubble across a lady thats interested in u unless ur some insta type model guy with pecks and abs and a chiveled jaw its pure pot luck
Edit!!! i wrote this reply then looked at fellwinters profike and low and beyold u see a slim toned six packed guy hmmmm point made
Having looked at yours. Your first picture I saw was a dick pic which I find a total turn off so I would be likely to lose interest. When you go further you do have some nice pictures but the dick pic spoils it.
Thank you for advice. I was in to minds to put it public or not.
God that was brutal! You can be honest but don’t have to be mean and ripp people to shreds!
I think your profile is good. Just be yourself and have fun. "
Thank you for saying that. |
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