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Finding a single lady for FFM
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By *andB2022 OP Couple
over a year ago
Weston-super-Mare |
Has anyone else experienced issues finding a lady to join a couple for a ffm?
Finding some chatting then they disappear or say after long convo they are to busy...
Anyone else have this ?? |
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Basically you are looking for Elvis riding a unicorn.
Good luck.
You're best bet is finding a couple where the Miss can join you while hubby watches.
Try the clubs, go as a couple and strike up conversations with other couples. |
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We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. |
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"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
This is great advice |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Has anyone else experienced issues finding a lady to join a couple for a ffm?
Finding some chatting then they disappear or say after long convo they are to busy...
Anyone else have this ?? "
Chatting about what?
If you're doing sex chat it's likely you're giving a man something to wank about. He (she) was never going to meet. |
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"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
That's great advice and so true |
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"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
That's great advice. We are exactly the same in that we don't have an agenda and just enjoy getting to know people |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
This!!!
People like OP is why I don’t join couples anymore, couples like the one that commented this are the ones I wanted to stick around. Definitely if your only aim is to have sex and see the conversation leading to it as a burden, you’re less likely to meet any women at all. |
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By *atKat-xoxWoman
over a year ago
Neath,united kingdom |
"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
Love love love this |
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I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable. |
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By *icentiousCouple
over a year ago
Up on them there hills |
We have always let ladies approach us.
No pressure, always fun and a good chat afterwards (who knows round 2 can often be less sexually intense and a lot more playful).
Have gained some great friends that are always fun to meet, simply for a drink or occasionally more. |
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"I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable."
I feel you, I don't live with my couple so when we both drive away it's like a dagger in the stomach |
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"I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable.
I feel you, I don't live with my couple so when we both drive away it's like a dagger in the stomach "
Could you not asked them to adopt you at this point?  |
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By *BW.EvaWoman
over a year ago
Carrington, Manchester |
I get approached by couples because I have alot of females and couples who have verified me. I go to clubs alot.
I do have my profile open to couples cos of cuckqueaning. But will play with women as well, but won't lick pussy. Not my bag. I have done, was bi-curious at uni, had several fff sessions! It isn't for me. That puts some couples off. |
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"Hi op I'm not your target market ,but most single men and couples are here for an ffm its seems.
Perhaps try a club as I've seen people post that they've had more success in clubs.
"
How many women can you find on one night who is a unicorn? I didn't see any when I went to clubs |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi op I'm not your target market ,but most single men and couples are here for an ffm its seems.
Perhaps try a club as I've seen people post that they've had more success in clubs.
How many women can you find on one night who is a unicorn? I didn't see any when I went to clubs"
Have to agree, we've seen very few single women in clubs, the odd one that will come already with a couple maybe but not many at all... its what we are mostly here for but understand that it's pretty hard to find. X |
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Yes, we are not finding it too easy either...
Men want to chat and meet us all the time ladies, not so much.
I guess my age probably puts them off on face value, but they are missing out on some fun! |
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"Hi op I'm not your target market ,but most single men and couples are here for an ffm its seems.
Perhaps try a club as I've seen people post that they've had more success in clubs.
How many women can you find on one night who is a unicorn? I didn't see any when I went to clubs"
I guess it depends what nights people go to the club's..
I started as a single and went regularly each week to mixed nights and couples nights
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We have had a few single females approach us but most have been timewasters or only interested in ff fun. We stick to couple only for this very reason, in a 3, 4 couple scenarios you can make up whatever combination you want. |
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By *aretobareCouple
over a year ago
Central Portugal |
We have found Fab fantastic for meeting single women and most are not time wasters but we do think it helps a lot if you
1. Speak normally to someone and use humour
2. Have verifications from single women
3. Are genuinely looking to play as ffm and not ff or mf
Good luck guys |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I usually offer to meet up with the female half first, make sure we have a good connection and hot chemistry before I organise anything more.
I find lots of women say that they are bi but only are when their man is present.
Surprisingly the offer is rarely accepted although I wonder if it would be if I wanted to meet the male half first  |
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"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
Living in a London Borough helps,there's more people to choose from than somewhere like Weston Super Mare. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi op I'm not your target market ,but most single men and couples are here for an ffm its seems.
Perhaps try a club as I've seen people post that they've had more success in clubs.
How many women can you find on one night who is a unicorn? I didn't see any when I went to clubs"
When you went to Jaydees did you actually speak to any single ladies and ask them if they were unicorns?, I know there was at least 4 ladies there that night that are bi and play with couples, you wouldn't know bye looking at 3 of them you would need to talk to them and find out, the other has a tattoo of a unicorn on her leg so that might be a bit of a give away mind  |
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"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
Absolutely love this, wise words indeed!!  |
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"Has anyone else experienced issues finding a lady to join a couple for a ffm?
Finding some chatting then they disappear or say after long convo they are to busy...
Anyone else have this ?? "
I meet couples for FFM fun.
Not really interested in a long term friendship or any form of relationship.
Got friends and a fabulous husband so only looking on a sex / swingers site for recreational sex.
Don't get me wrong, it's nice to meet friendly folk that's why a social meet initially always happens.
If there isn't a spark, they can't string a sentence together or an over bearing partner, not going to meet again.
Usually takes about 15 minutes to decide if a FFM will be on the cards or a FFMM couples meet.
Don't do long term friendships as never mix our swinging friends with our non swinging friends.
It our secret life and like to keep it that way.
Wouldn't want to upset or mislead anyone into thinking our meets were some form of relationship, just fun.
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You may be surprised what goes on in Weston! There are at least 6 bi women there, or at least there will be on Saturday at the party we are attending.
"
Living in a London Borough helps,there's more people to choose from than somewhere like Weston Super Mare."
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People are fussy and fickle. Often things can be going great but the one wrong thing said and the deal is off. I know this is true of My Girl. She can talking to people and it's going well but then a/the guy or a lady says the wrong thing and it's like no, not for me. |
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"I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable."
So much this!
Everyone wants to play with the unicorn, have fun with the unicorn. No one wants to look after or provide aftercare to the unicorn (should it be wanted/needed).
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable.
So much this!
Everyone wants to play with the unicorn, have fun with the unicorn. No one wants to look after or provide aftercare to the unicorn (should it be wanted/needed).
"
Is it a little odd that I feel the same way when approached by couples, I like at least some leave of friendship with people before playing and don't want to feel just used and then dropped after I'm done with, |
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"I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable.
So much this!
Everyone wants to play with the unicorn, have fun with the unicorn. No one wants to look after or provide aftercare to the unicorn (should it be wanted/needed).
"
That actually made me (Mr) feel sad, never thought about the going home alone part for the single.
Actually like the principle of a throuple for this very reason. Sitting on the sofa and chilling, girls could be chatting while I just listen. I mean we do like ffm but there’s only so long you can play and then what’s left. But can also see why this could make Mrs insecure too. |
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"I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable.
So much this!
Everyone wants to play with the unicorn, have fun with the unicorn. No one wants to look after or provide aftercare to the unicorn (should it be wanted/needed).
That actually made me (Mr) feel sad, never thought about the going home alone part for the single.
Actually like the principle of a throuple for this very reason. Sitting on the sofa and chilling, girls could be chatting while I just listen. I mean we do like ffm but there’s only so long you can play and then what’s left. But can also see why this could make Mrs insecure too. "
Triads (hate the term throuple) can be fun. So long as everyone is invested and you work on all the relationships between each pair and three as a whole. But there's definitely something between having fun and walking away and relationships. A bit of cuddling and chat. Watching a film, group text chat. Just check in and make sure they're ok. It'll be different for every person on any given day as to what they want/need. But the social hang out can be just as important in building ongoing connections.
Don't get me wrong, I like being single, I like playing with couples. I like the freedom of doing who and what I like. But sometimes after a good session the night or next couple of days after can feel a little bit lonely. Couples can cuddle and relive and chat about the evening and "reconnect", but the single often has no one to talk it over with. |
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"I’m not your target but still can provide an advice from a single woman’s perspective.
The main reason I’m not meeting couples is when fun and games are over, I’m still going home alone, while you are both together, and that’s the moment I feel most vulnerable.
So much this!
Everyone wants to play with the unicorn, have fun with the unicorn. No one wants to look after or provide aftercare to the unicorn (should it be wanted/needed).
Is it a little odd that I feel the same way when approached by couples, I like at least some leave of friendship with people before playing and don't want to feel just used and then dropped after I'm done with, "
Not odd at all x |
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"
Triads (hate the term throuple) can be fun. So long as everyone is invested and you work on all the relationships between each pair and three as a whole. But there's definitely something between having fun and walking away and relationships. A bit of cuddling and chat. Watching a film, group text chat. Just check in and make sure they're ok. It'll be different for every person on any given day as to what they want/need. But the social hang out can be just as important in building ongoing connections.
Don't get me wrong, I like being single, I like playing with couples. I like the freedom of doing who and what I like. But sometimes after a good session the night or next couple of days after can feel a little bit lonely. Couples can cuddle and relive and chat about the evening and "reconnect", but the single often has no one to talk it over with. "
Not familiar with triad usage, will google. Throuple just sounds pleasing more than it means anything to me anyway.
The disadvantage to a couple is that you can’t walk away and have your own space, something we rarely need anyway as we have our own lives and hobbies. As Red said (tongue in cheek) when the single lady next door wanted me for chores a bit too much - “she doesn’t have to put up with having a husband so why should she get all the benefits” |
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"Has anyone else experienced issues finding a lady to join a couple for a ffm?
Finding some chatting then they disappear or say after long convo they are to busy...
Anyone else have this ?? "
I'm a single bi woman on here, I won't meet bi curious women when they're in a MF couple. In my experience when a woman's bi curious it's mainly for the man's enjoyment. I don't want to feel like I'm a rent-a-tongue again  |
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"I'm a single bi woman on here, I won't meet bi curious women when they're in a MF couple. In my experience when a woman's bi curious it's mainly for the man's enjoyment. I don't want to feel like I'm a rent-a-tongue again "
This happens to us as well, so it’s not exclusive to ‘unicorns’ I’m afraid. Shame as Mrs has only realised she is properly bi this last year and she loooves playing with ladies. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I appreciate it was tongue in cheek… but aftercare isn’t a benefit.
Personally I don’t need aftercare but some people can have drops after play especially if they haven’t built the right rapport to suit their needs where they can reach out after.
Single women who play with couple tent a myth. I exclusively find couples in clubs, never on fab. Life (and chatting to single guys) is hard enough without expending all that effort on a couple who may disappear or not be interested after that night (I realise that’s not all couples) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Hi op I'm not your target market ,but most single men and couples are here for an ffm its seems.
Perhaps try a club as I've seen people post that they've had more success in clubs.
"
Definitely! Clubs are the best way. |
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By *jonesMan
over a year ago
Plymouth |
"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile.
That's great advice and so true "
I wish it applied to guys as well... |
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"We have never had any shortage of women interested in us. I think that's because it's more important to us to be friends with somebody that to have sex with them.
We don't target having sex with women. We target making friends. If that leads to sex then great, but if not then it won't affect us wanting to know somebody. We don't approach women with a sexual agenda and we have known several Fab women who feel comfortable knowing us.
My advice is get to know people because you like being around them. If a woman feels that you only know her because you want to have sex with her she will likely run a mile. "
This is how we are. Making friends is important to us. If it leads to other things then thats great if not then we still made a new friend. Joanne |
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"I appreciate it was tongue in cheek… but aftercare isn’t a benefit.
Personally I don’t need aftercare but some people can have drops after play especially if they haven’t built the right rapport to suit their needs where they can reach out after.
"
Personally I think that if it’s just a random club meet and the single lady has no interest in another meet, it’s fine to make sure they are safe and happy, have a drink together and relax before going on your way, no further aftercare required.
If the lady wants to pursue friendship or more, and all are in agreement, then of course continued conversation and aftercare would be a natural thing, in our case anyway. Most likely that would be in the form of group messaging and the ladies meeting socially etc.. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I appreciate it was tongue in cheek… but aftercare isn’t a benefit.
Personally I don’t need aftercare but some people can have drops after play especially if they haven’t built the right rapport to suit their needs where they can reach out after.
Personally I think that if it’s just a random club meet and the single lady has no interest in another meet, it’s fine to make sure they are safe and happy, have a drink together and relax before going on your way, no further aftercare required.
If the lady wants to pursue friendship or more, and all are in agreement, then of course continued conversation and aftercare would be a natural thing, in our case anyway. Most likely that would be in the form of group messaging and the ladies meeting socially etc.."
I agree, I only really meet couples in clubs. But I think chatting to people via fab and arranging a private meet has more difficulties. And if you aren’t meeting in clubs you may have to take aftercare into account for some people. I may have accidentally derailed but I guess my point was that there can be an element of vulnerability as a single joining a couple. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a FB, both have profiles,for along time
Finding a woman to meet us both is pretty much impossible
They will message back, and go along with it. But always back out |
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"I agree, I only really meet couples in clubs. But I think chatting to people via fab and arranging a private meet has more difficulties. And if you aren’t meeting in clubs you may have to take aftercare into account for some people. I may have accidentally derailed but I guess my point was that there can be an element of vulnerability as a single joining a couple. "
Agreed, probably best to chat here first and arrange a club meet, private meets are onerous for sure x |
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"I have a FB, both have profiles,for along time
Finding a woman to meet us both is pretty much impossible
They will message back, and go along with it. But always back out "
Could be because you message them from your mens profile and ask them to meet you and your fwb. I've had a few recently and every time the women's profiles said straight. I'm not here to turn a straight woman no matter how much the male half wants to see it  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I have a FB, both have profiles,for along time
Finding a woman to meet us both is pretty much impossible
They will message back, and go along with it. But always back out
Could be because you message them from your mens profile and ask them to meet you and your fwb. I've had a few recently and every time the women's profiles said straight. I'm not here to turn a straight woman no matter how much the male half wants to see it "
I always assume the woman doesn't even know the guy or what he's trying to plan.... |
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"I'm not here to turn a straight woman no matter how much the male half wants to see it "
that is so true, we’ve had a few meets where they said the woman was bi, only for poor Red to end up disappointed when in the flesh they say not. It’s not the end of the world but she really loves the girl play element. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Clubs are the best way to meet single ladies. We have played with a good few single ladies and happy to call them our friends.
Clubs are the best to meet anyone really.  |
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By *weetCruellaWoman
over a year ago
somewhere sweet and sour |
It can be just as hard for a unicorn as well. I've done the group text, bit of flirting but when we have met, there wasn't a sexual spark. Which is fine just don't not tell me.
Last couple I met for a social went so well that I remembered how good playing with couples can be.
But I've been to a club on saturday night before (single ladies and couples) and 1 couple spoke to me lol
I don't need aftercare, as long as I get a hug kiss and a grope on my way out I can go home happy and know I had a great night. Lol.
But like others have said, I too won't go for bi curious anymore. I'm not a teacher I'm a spanker lol
 
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"I think it's important to remember what can you provide to them instead of what can they provide for you?"
Hit the nail on the head here!
My short answer is that I prefer to meet couples only at a party in a club - less pressure, less expectations, part of a fun night as a whole
My long answer is the following which I saved from a post many moons ago. It explains perfectly what people might need to consider (and rarely do).
* I am a person.
I’m not a prop or an object or a sex toy. I’m not a porn star or a fictitious sex driven fantasy woman. I’m aware that you’re contacting me for a specific reason, but that’s not the only reason I exist. If you’re contacting me online, choose your words mindfully. An introductory email about “cumming all over that sexy body” or “laying the pipe down” does not make me want to drop everything to meet you. Try an intelligent respectful introduction with some reference to what you read in my profile instead. If you meet me in person at a club or party, treat me the way you’d treat anyone you’re meeting in public for the first time.
* I have my own fantasies too.
If you’re part of a couple and you’re contacting me, you probably have an idea of what you’d like to experience when you add another woman. Keep in mind that even though the two of you know what you want, the only way I’m going to be willing to participate is if I can get what I want too. Ask me about my fantasies. Pay attention when I tell you what I am looking for and what I enjoy. Too often, couples want to center the experience around the two of them entirely. If your fantasy makes me the source of your pleasure without allowing me to be pleasured as well, I’m not interested.
* I’m not your experiment.
If you’re new to the lifestyle and we have good chemistry, your lack of experience won’t matter at all. However, you might be a couple with far too many rules. You might be a couple that wants things go exactly according to your plan because you (understandably) want to be as comfortable as possible. If you need to move slowly, I respect that. If one of you isn’t sure they’re ready, I totally respect that BUT I’m not going to play with you. I don’t want to go home sexually frustrated. I don’t want to be a source of tension if things go “too far” and I don’t want to waste my precious time or yours. If you want to lightly test the waters, find someone who is also new to this. Try a party or club and see if you can meet someone who is up for some flirting and light play.
* I’m not your teacher.
Do you want me to guide you through your first threesome? Are you looking for someone to “help” a wife or girlfriend try her first bisexual experience? I have a few important questions: What’s in it for me? Why would I want to turn my playtime into a tutoring session? What if one of you is not a good “student”? I’d rather not set myself up for disappointment.
* I have a life of my own
If we do meet and have a great time, please remember that I have a life outside of being your play partner. I am so much more than a unicorn. My career, my family, my friends, and my own goals and needs are important to me. Respect my priorities. If you’re the type who takes it personally if I don’t respond to your messages and photos immediately, we aren’t compatible. |
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"Has anyone else experienced issues finding a lady to join a couple for a ffm?
Finding some chatting then they disappear or say after long convo they are to busy...
Anyone else have this ?? "
Yes the struggle is real. The term unicorn is used for a reason |
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"I think it's important to remember what can you provide to them instead of what can they provide for you?
Hit the nail on the head here!
My short answer is that I prefer to meet couples only at a party in a club - less pressure, less expectations, part of a fun night as a whole
My long answer is the following which I saved from a post many moons ago. It explains perfectly what people might need to consider (and rarely do).
* I am a person.
I’m not a prop or an object or a sex toy. I’m not a porn star or a fictitious sex driven fantasy woman. I’m aware that you’re contacting me for a specific reason, but that’s not the only reason I exist. If you’re contacting me online, choose your words mindfully. An introductory email about “cumming all over that sexy body” or “laying the pipe down” does not make me want to drop everything to meet you. Try an intelligent respectful introduction with some reference to what you read in my profile instead. If you meet me in person at a club or party, treat me the way you’d treat anyone you’re meeting in public for the first time.
* I have my own fantasies too.
If you’re part of a couple and you’re contacting me, you probably have an idea of what you’d like to experience when you add another woman. Keep in mind that even though the two of you know what you want, the only way I’m going to be willing to participate is if I can get what I want too. Ask me about my fantasies. Pay attention when I tell you what I am looking for and what I enjoy. Too often, couples want to center the experience around the two of them entirely. If your fantasy makes me the source of your pleasure without allowing me to be pleasured as well, I’m not interested.
* I’m not your experiment.
If you’re new to the lifestyle and we have good chemistry, your lack of experience won’t matter at all. However, you might be a couple with far too many rules. You might be a couple that wants things go exactly according to your plan because you (understandably) want to be as comfortable as possible. If you need to move slowly, I respect that. If one of you isn’t sure they’re ready, I totally respect that BUT I’m not going to play with you. I don’t want to go home sexually frustrated. I don’t want to be a source of tension if things go “too far” and I don’t want to waste my precious time or yours. If you want to lightly test the waters, find someone who is also new to this. Try a party or club and see if you can meet someone who is up for some flirting and light play.
* I’m not your teacher.
Do you want me to guide you through your first threesome? Are you looking for someone to “help” a wife or girlfriend try her first bisexual experience? I have a few important questions: What’s in it for me? Why would I want to turn my playtime into a tutoring session? What if one of you is not a good “student”? I’d rather not set myself up for disappointment.
* I have a life of my own
If we do meet and have a great time, please remember that I have a life outside of being your play partner. I am so much more than a unicorn. My career, my family, my friends, and my own goals and needs are important to me. Respect my priorities. If you’re the type who takes it personally if I don’t respond to your messages and photos immediately, we aren’t compatible."
Quite a good read x |
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"I think it's important to remember what can you provide to them instead of what can they provide for you?
Hit the nail on the head here!
My short answer is that I prefer to meet couples only at a party in a club - less pressure, less expectations, part of a fun night as a whole
My long answer is the following which I saved from a post many moons ago. It explains perfectly what people might need to consider (and rarely do).
* I am a person.
I’m not a prop or an object or a sex toy. I’m not a porn star or a fictitious sex driven fantasy woman. I’m aware that you’re contacting me for a specific reason, but that’s not the only reason I exist. If you’re contacting me online, choose your words mindfully. An introductory email about “cumming all over that sexy body” or “laying the pipe down” does not make me want to drop everything to meet you. Try an intelligent respectful introduction with some reference to what you read in my profile instead. If you meet me in person at a club or party, treat me the way you’d treat anyone you’re meeting in public for the first time.
* I have my own fantasies too.
If you’re part of a couple and you’re contacting me, you probably have an idea of what you’d like to experience when you add another woman. Keep in mind that even though the two of you know what you want, the only way I’m going to be willing to participate is if I can get what I want too. Ask me about my fantasies. Pay attention when I tell you what I am looking for and what I enjoy. Too often, couples want to center the experience around the two of them entirely. If your fantasy makes me the source of your pleasure without allowing me to be pleasured as well, I’m not interested.
* I’m not your experiment.
If you’re new to the lifestyle and we have good chemistry, your lack of experience won’t matter at all. However, you might be a couple with far too many rules. You might be a couple that wants things go exactly according to your plan because you (understandably) want to be as comfortable as possible. If you need to move slowly, I respect that. If one of you isn’t sure they’re ready, I totally respect that BUT I’m not going to play with you. I don’t want to go home sexually frustrated. I don’t want to be a source of tension if things go “too far” and I don’t want to waste my precious time or yours. If you want to lightly test the waters, find someone who is also new to this. Try a party or club and see if you can meet someone who is up for some flirting and light play.
* I’m not your teacher.
Do you want me to guide you through your first threesome? Are you looking for someone to “help” a wife or girlfriend try her first bisexual experience? I have a few important questions: What’s in it for me? Why would I want to turn my playtime into a tutoring session? What if one of you is not a good “student”? I’d rather not set myself up for disappointment.
* I have a life of my own
If we do meet and have a great time, please remember that I have a life outside of being your play partner. I am so much more than a unicorn. My career, my family, my friends, and my own goals and needs are important to me. Respect my priorities. If you’re the type who takes it personally if I don’t respond to your messages and photos immediately, we aren’t compatible.
Quite a good read x"
I’m glad you think so as I feared I’d completely killed the chat x |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"I think it's important to remember what can you provide to them instead of what can they provide for you?
Hit the nail on the head here!
My short answer is that I prefer to meet couples only at a party in a club - less pressure, less expectations, part of a fun night as a whole
My long answer is the following which I saved from a post many moons ago. It explains perfectly what people might need to consider (and rarely do).
* I am a person.
I’m not a prop or an object or a sex toy. I’m not a porn star or a fictitious sex driven fantasy woman. I’m aware that you’re contacting me for a specific reason, but that’s not the only reason I exist. If you’re contacting me online, choose your words mindfully. An introductory email about “cumming all over that sexy body” or “laying the pipe down” does not make me want to drop everything to meet you. Try an intelligent respectful introduction with some reference to what you read in my profile instead. If you meet me in person at a club or party, treat me the way you’d treat anyone you’re meeting in public for the first time.
* I have my own fantasies too.
If you’re part of a couple and you’re contacting me, you probably have an idea of what you’d like to experience when you add another woman. Keep in mind that even though the two of you know what you want, the only way I’m going to be willing to participate is if I can get what I want too. Ask me about my fantasies. Pay attention when I tell you what I am looking for and what I enjoy. Too often, couples want to center the experience around the two of them entirely. If your fantasy makes me the source of your pleasure without allowing me to be pleasured as well, I’m not interested.
* I’m not your experiment.
If you’re new to the lifestyle and we have good chemistry, your lack of experience won’t matter at all. However, you might be a couple with far too many rules. You might be a couple that wants things go exactly according to your plan because you (understandably) want to be as comfortable as possible. If you need to move slowly, I respect that. If one of you isn’t sure they’re ready, I totally respect that BUT I’m not going to play with you. I don’t want to go home sexually frustrated. I don’t want to be a source of tension if things go “too far” and I don’t want to waste my precious time or yours. If you want to lightly test the waters, find someone who is also new to this. Try a party or club and see if you can meet someone who is up for some flirting and light play.
* I’m not your teacher.
Do you want me to guide you through your first threesome? Are you looking for someone to “help” a wife or girlfriend try her first bisexual experience? I have a few important questions: What’s in it for me? Why would I want to turn my playtime into a tutoring session? What if one of you is not a good “student”? I’d rather not set myself up for disappointment.
* I have a life of my own
If we do meet and have a great time, please remember that I have a life outside of being your play partner. I am so much more than a unicorn. My career, my family, my friends, and my own goals and needs are important to me. Respect my priorities. If you’re the type who takes it personally if I don’t respond to your messages and photos immediately, we aren’t compatible.
Quite a good read x
I’m glad you think so as I feared I’d completely killed the chat x"
If we keep quoting it like this we will kill the chat  x |
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