FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Help me with a reality check
Help me with a reality check
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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What are people's thoughts about looking for a hotgf/hotwife or cuckoldress on here as a single guy?
For background I've recently changed what I've been looking for.
In my experience it tends to be couples looking for a bull here. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It sounds like you want to fetishise someone ... that might suit someone "
You're right! Do you think it's possible to have that and still have a good relationship?
((Deleted above as I ballsed up the quote)) |
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"What are people's thoughts about looking for a hotgf/hotwife or cuckoldress on here as a single guy?
For background I've recently changed what I've been looking for.
In my experience it tends to be couples looking for a bull here."
I think anything is possible on fab. Your profile reads really good and what you are looking for. This is definitely an interest of mine. I hope you find what you are looking for  |
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By *oxy jWoman
over a year ago
somerset |
hot wife / hot gf i say is possible as for a cuckoldress id say not so cuckolding is based on long term relationships and most of the cuckold thing is not sexual between them its in the mind its also the love invoved for it to be cuckold ....
id say most cuckold couples started out in a hotwife type relationship before cuckold |
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"It sounds like you want to fetishise someone ... that might suit someone "
That's a little harsh. People have all sorts of requirements for traits and lifestyle for their long term relationships, you would not say it's calculative or objectifying for the ones that are prevalent. This is an unusual one but in essence I don't see that much difference.
OP yes fabs is a good place to try, the kind of woman you're looking for would be active here. However when singles join here they often specifically not looking for a relationship. So if you're feeling bold I'd say also put this out on the more casual of the dating apps. It's a long shot, but good for you to be so conscious and open about it, I really wish you good luck. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don’t think it’s entirely unrealistic. You might have more luck on the dating site that starts with F & ends with d and has an orange logo.
I’d question what you’re actually looking for and why. Personally I’d enjoy a relationship like this, but I’m not into humiliation and I wouldn’t want to fuck the kind of guys many cuckolds want to see their partners with. So definitely ask yourself, would you want your partner to fuck a certain type of man? Why are you wanting her to fuck other men - to genuinely fulfill what SHE wants, or for your own gratification? |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"What are people's thoughts about looking for a hotgf/hotwife or cuckoldress on here as a single guy?
For background I've recently changed what I've been looking for.
In my experience it tends to be couples looking for a bull here.
I think anything is possible on fab. Your profile reads really good and what you are looking for. This is definitely an interest of mine. I hope you find what you are looking for "
Thank you for the kind words. I hope you find it too! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"hot wife / hot gf i say is possible as for a cuckoldress id say not so cuckolding is based on long term relationships and most of the cuckold thing is not sexual between them its in the mind its also the love invoved for it to be cuckold ....
id say most cuckold couples started out in a hotwife type relationship before cuckold"
I agree, I think a good emotional connection is key before going down either route because there's so much trust needed on both sides. Particularly for full the psychological aspect of cuckolding, I think that you can't really have it outside of a committed and caring relationship. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"It sounds like you want to fetishise someone ... that might suit someone
That's a little harsh. People have all sorts of requirements for traits and lifestyle for their long term relationships, you would not say it's calculative or objectifying for the ones that are prevalent. This is an unusual one but in essence I don't see that much difference.
OP yes fabs is a good place to try, the kind of woman you're looking for would be active here. However when singles join here they often specifically not looking for a relationship. So if you're feeling bold I'd say also put this out on the more casual of the dating apps. It's a long shot, but good for you to be so conscious and open about it, I really wish you good luck."
Thank you for such a thoughtful response to my post and for your encouragement.
I can see where the original replier was coming from, and sometimes I do feel guilty about seeking a person interested in this specifically because maybe it is a barrier to real intimacy and seeing them as a person. I've come to realise it probably is a requirement that I can't get away from through a bit of trial and error, however.
You put it so elegantly and I agree with you that it is a reasonale thing to want in a partner. I think it isn't too disimilar to seeking someone into say, kink play, or caravan ownership.
I figured Fab is one of my best bets, but yes as you women often aren't looking for a relationship. I'm hoping that they might join and not realise men like me are out there, so taking a proactive approach might pay off. The downside here is the demographic is a little bit older and that's a potential barrier for a proper relationship.
My reluctance about using the mainstream dating apps is I will have to put my face to it. I work in a public facing authority figure role and I just don't know how to reconcile that with sexually submissive man seeking cuckoldress! |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"I don’t think it’s entirely unrealistic. You might have more luck on the dating site that starts with F & ends with d and has an orange logo.
I’d question what you’re actually looking for and why. Personally I’d enjoy a relationship like this, but I’m not into humiliation and I wouldn’t want to fuck the kind of guys many cuckolds want to see their partners with. So definitely ask yourself, would you want your partner to fuck a certain type of man? Why are you wanting her to fuck other men - to genuinely fulfill what SHE wants, or for your own gratification? "
I have downloaded that app, adoption is a little bit slow up here in the North East but I'm hoping when I move to London things will be a little bit livlier! I have the worry about my face being on it there but less so because it's for that niche.
I do enjoy the more humiliating side of it, the jealousy and strong emotions, being denied, degraded, but also the more wholesome compersion side of it.
So to answer the second part I guess it's both, I probably wouldn't be interested if it wasn't for my own gratification in some way. Part of that gratification just comes from letting her have her fun, being free to do as she pleases and hopefully be a more sexual and sexually satisfied person. I don't have some of the typical cliche expectations about who she should fuck (the dominant BBC seems to be a popular one), I think that kind of defeats the purpose for me at least. So long as I'm her primary partner, we have the emotional connection and I'm her best boy then that's me really. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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So to answer the second part I guess it's both, I probably wouldn't be interested if it wasn't for my own gratification in some way. Part of that gratification just comes from letting her have her fun, being free to do as she pleases and hopefully be a more sexual and sexually satisfied person. I don't have some of the typical cliche expectations about who she should fuck (the dominant BBC seems to be a popular one), I think that kind of defeats the purpose for me at least. So long as I'm her primary partner, we have the emotional connection and I'm her best boy then that's me really."
Ahhhh bless you, yes you sound like you’ve got your head on right. I think when you move to London you’ll definitely have options. I go to a few femdom events here where you’ll definitely meet women of a similar mind. |
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