FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > Nothings working for me
Nothings working for me
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I would start again… it sound harsh but sometimes you just need to rip the plaster off.
Firstly your age is going against you - this is a swingers site not a hook up (contrary to popular belief) most of us here will have kids your age - not many would want to fuck their kids friends. But alas nothing you can do about that.
Your pics are not the best at all.
You have no profile - what can you offer couples/females.
You have about 5 seconds to sell yourself before the message gets deleted, so what would you say if you wanted to meet Mrs Batman? |
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There's roughly 100 guys to every female on this site, meaning most guys are going to be massively disapointed
Try a club or an organised social event (most big towns have them a few times a year) as a way of meeting likeminded people, it's for much easier face to face |
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"I would start again… it sound harsh but sometimes you just need to rip the plaster off.
Firstly your age is going against you - this is a swingers site not a hook up (contrary to popular belief) most of us here will have kids your age - not many would want to fuck their kids friends. But alas nothing you can do about that.
Your pics are not the best at all.
You have no profile - what can you offer couples/females.
You have about 5 seconds to sell yourself before the message gets deleted, so what would you say if you wanted to meet Mrs Batman?"
100% agree with this. |
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"What things would i need to change?
Perhaps explain why you can't accommodate? People might assume you're not single. "
He’s 21 - highly likely he’s still at home with his parents.
Can you just imagine the look on their faces if a couple turned up to play in his room…  |
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90% of the men on here think there entitled to a fuck just because its a swinging site, if you have this mindset (not saying you have op) then you got no chance of a response let alone a meet.
Put the effort in a you will reap the rewards xx
Happy fabbing all |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Your age will play a big factor
Have you been to clubs and socials? If not then you can’t say nothing is working for you.
Change your approach if it’s not working |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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You age will be a factor, plus I’d look at your profile and expand it a bit, give some more information as it reads like you think this is purely a hook up site! |
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"What things would i need to change?
Perhaps explain why you can't accommodate? People might assume you're not single.
He’s 21 - highly likely he’s still at home with his parents.
Can you just imagine the look on their faces if a couple turned up to play in his room… "
*Ding dong*
“Hello, Mrs Outline, is K in?”
“Yes, love, he’s in his room playing computer games. Head on up and I’ll bring you all up some squash”.
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"What things would i need to change?
Perhaps explain why you can't accommodate? People might assume you're not single.
He’s 21 - highly likely he’s still at home with his parents.
Can you just imagine the look on their faces if a couple turned up to play in his room…
*Ding dong*
“Hello, Mrs Outline, is K in?”
“Yes, love, he’s in his room playing computer games. Head on up and I’ll bring you all up some squash”.
"
Thank you Mrs Patterson |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What things would i need to change?
Perhaps explain why you can't accommodate? People might assume you're not single. "
How many 21 year olds do you know that can afford to live by themselves? |
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By *ucka39Man
over a year ago
Newcastle |
Hi op
Maybe you could try searching the forum from previous folk whom asked similar as yourself and by that help you to create your profile. Only you know about yourself and things you want to explore and if you have any preferences. It's a starting point
Good luck  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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To be fair when I was 21 Straight of uni I could afford a three bed loft conversion in London, now after paying for the mortgage to keep my ex wife in a home I’m looking at flat sharing at 45  |
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Hi OP, welcome!
As others have said, your age will work against you, but that’s not to say you won’t tick the box for some. Also, just because it’s a ‘sex site’/ ‘swinging site’ doesn’t mean it’s a free for all, most will still have a type and preference, so reduce expectations of the responses you will get.
Other things to consider:
• You need more & better photos (something a bit more appealing/ sexy…. The photo with the fridge serves no purpose, sorry)
• More detailed bio… it barely says anything atm and we do read the bios, they do matter. What do you have to offer? What type are you looking for? What are you into?
• Remember, men outnumber women 100:1 or more on here, so first impressions and first messages count, most messages just get deleted if they don’t stand out.
• Be polite and respectful, show a bit of personality, be positive, reduce expectations of having people queuing up for a shag 
Good luck! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What things would i need to change?
Perhaps explain why you can't accommodate? People might assume you're not single.
He’s 21 - highly likely he’s still at home with his parents.
Can you just imagine the look on their faces if a couple turned up to play in his room… "
I actually laughed out loud at this  |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Im new to fab and keep on finding women im attracted to but seem to get no response, anything im doing wrong or am i just 2/10??"
When you say nothing's working for you... How much stuff have you actually tried? |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What things would i need to change?
Perhaps explain why you can't accommodate? People might assume you're not single.
How many 21 year olds do you know that can afford to live by themselves? "
I was just suggesting he explained - same advice as I'd give to any man who had this on his profile. |
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By *DW1983Man
over a year ago
Aberdeen, Leeds, Sheffield |
I think all the advice above is worth heeding. Lower your expectations, and go to a club. I've tried all sorts of permutations of profile text, images and messages over the years, and the response rate is low. Very low. And even those who do answer, I often find that after a day or so it fizzles out, even a good conversation, presumably because it's been buried by the 463 other messages she's received overnight.
Without wanting to sound too negative, and I imagine it's the same for a lot of guys, I've never had a meet that was initiated on here. Which makes me think I'm no good, unattractive, uninteresting and all that woe-is-me negativity. But then I look at the experiences I've had by going to clubs, where I've been invited to play with some very attractive women, and had some fantastic nights. Which makes me conclude two things: clubs are a better way to meet, and that actually, I'm not really that bad after all... |
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"Im new to fab and keep on finding women im attracted to but seem to get no response, anything im doing wrong or am i just 2/10??"
finding women your attracted to is the easy bit, fact is women on here are bombarded with messages 24/7 if you don’t have a profile that stands out to them you will get ignored, I’m not a woman but see things from their point of view because I get bombarded with dozens of messages off men every day I try to message everyone that messages me even to say a polite no thank you but is very difficult sometimes, look at some of the photos of women that you like and see how many times those photos have been fabbed it’s absolutely phoenominal!
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"Love the photo looking in the fridge at the local shop.
Is it a still from CCTV to identify a shoplifter ?"
no it’s just a photo of a chap who can’t decide which flavour of monster to choose ( I bought a can the other day from home bargains, but sadly I didn’t have anyone with me to capture the moment..... I must try harder) |
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Most people are not mutually compatible with most other people. Thus most messages won't lead to replies, meets and sex. If you don't have realistic expectations, based on this, you will be disappointed.
As fab gives lots of choice to people who aren't men, this means that this simple fact of life will let some of us to be more unsatisfied than others, because people won't pick bad matches or waste time, when they narrow down their efforts to fruitful engagement.
Men here typically have unrealistic expectations when new. It takes months to become established and to get to know others. They often don't make best use of their time, especially by not selling themselves well - good profiles, with clear pics, showing us what we need, to assess them as a guy we'd possibly like intimate contact with. And they don't often sell themselves well - the onus is on each of them to do this.
Men don't often go to swinging clubs. Yet they can use their life experience of engaging with other people there! If they are interested in swinging, you'd imagine that they would be at swinging clubs 
Assess everything you're doing and up the game.  . Every day, keep monitoring your steps and adjust as you progress |
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"( I bought a can the other day from home bargains, but sadly I didn’t have anyone with me to capture the moment..... I must try harder)
What flavour did you choose ?"
monster mule the ginger one (in the black/copper colour can) it’s my fave only £1 |
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Some good advice already but the elephant in the room is your age range. How many young women do you think are on here ?
This isn’t Tinder or Bumble it’s a swingers site for liberated couples or singles.
If you’re thinking there an abundance of women around the ages of 18-30 are signed up on Fabswingers then you’re a very optimistic young man.
Good luck.
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"What things would i need to change?
Perhaps explain why you can't accommodate? People might assume you're not single.
He’s 21 - highly likely he’s still at home with his parents.
Can you just imagine the look on their faces if a couple turned up to play in his room… "
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Mate,
Most of the women on this site would eat you alive.
If you wish to stay, make your profile more interesting. Sell yourself and stand above the 100:1 ratio.
Don't post a dic pick and assume their knickers will fall off.
I've been on here since the beginning of August and have had four meets with two different women.
Apparently that's above average for a single guy.
It's about the only thing about me that is above average.
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As a single female on here there is nothing about your profile that would make me reply. And yes … everyone is correct. Your age goes against you sadly. Many women want experience and kink on here. Unfortunately you don’t sound as if you when either. Maybe try some parties like others have suggested but you really need to up your profile to stand out. We do get inundated so those with the chat stand out x |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I see he has taken all your advice on board "
As usual with profiles that start threads like this
Very few take any notice of the advice they are offered and even less bother to comment again. |
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"Effort………
Your pics & profile are seriously lacking in content. "
It's simply this is a nutshell
Now I'm no Adonis in fact I'm what you call a geek but I put the effort in on my profile ....I'm constantly trying to improve it and I get myself out to socials and I go to clubs
It's hard work for guys but as someone has said we're pretty much 10 a penny so if you want anything out of this scene it's simple out the effort in
To all those guys who have 20 dick pictures and two lines in the bio look at mine and take note of what is needed.
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