FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > How far is to far?
How far is to far?
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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Seems a simple question but how far would you travel for someone?
I only ask as i live in Ashford kent dont dive but can host .. it seems 30 minutes drive to far for People.... |
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Yes less than 30 minutes feels close and fairly easy. Our limit is roughly one hour for the right people/event. Any more than that and chances of it happening start dropping rapidly on both sides.
Talked to a couple the other day who were very keen but almost two hours away. We said probably too far for us but they said don't worry can sort something out and kept chasing. Then day or two later - "can you travel to us?" Grrr. No fuck off. |
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I wouldn't go too far ,especially as any first meet is a social only.I'd also never let anyone travel too far to meet me.
On my couple profile we'd be open to travelling further for the right people ,as it's so hard to find other couples. |
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"I wouldn't go too far ,especially as any first meet is a social only.I'd also never let anyone travel too far to meet me.
On my couple profile we'd be open to travelling further for the right people ,as it's so hard to find other couples."
Don't want to hijack the thread but so hard to find other couples? That surprises me. Are you looking for something very specific or extremely fussy?  |
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"I wouldn't go too far ,especially as any first meet is a social only.I'd also never let anyone travel too far to meet me.
On my couple profile we'd be open to travelling further for the right people ,as it's so hard to find other couples.
Don't want to hijack the thread but so hard to find other couples? That surprises me. Are you looking for something very specific or extremely fussy? "
I am picky ,but also straight & many in our area are specifically after bi fem couples.
Then you have to factor in 4 way attraction which isn't always there ,plus the availability of 4 people. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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Me and the wife have traveled 3 hours to meet a couple and the wifes FWB lives an hour and a half away, going to a meet on my own I've traveled just under an hour but would happily travel further, it's all part of the adventure. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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For me it now has to be my own or immediate towns/villages.
My time is tight and I have a child so I have to get childcare. That adds up when you take into account 30+ mins travel each way. Plus getting stuck in traffic/accidents on the A12. Also means there could be issues getting back quickly should my child need me.
Add the cost of diesel not to mention I hate driving lol.
So many guys that message me don't understand this and try and argue the point. Just because you are OK doing it doesn't mean everyone is. |
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By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
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"Yes less than 30 minutes feels close and fairly easy. Our limit is roughly one hour for the right people/event. Any more than that and chances of it happening start dropping rapidly on both sides.
Talked to a couple the other day who were very keen but almost two hours away. We said probably too far for us but they said don't worry can sort something out and kept chasing. Then day or two later - "can you travel to us?" Grrr. No fuck off. "
Yeah i think 1 hr about fair .. i just find it weird when people say no to 30 mins down road. |
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I think this all boils down to your personal circumstances and whether there is a healthy pool of individuals in your area that fit what you’re looking for and vice versa.
Personally distance isn’t a huge factor for me giving I travel the length and breadth of the country to go to clubs. If I’ve met someone there who lives miles away but I’ve built a connection with then I’d happily travel to go and visit them or if they’re willing to travel to me then great.
I certainly wouldn’t take the risk of meeting a stranger off the internet who lives miles away as there’s no trust or guarantee they’d actually turn up! So for the first meet (if not in a club), then ideally it would have to be someone relatively local for the most part |
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Roughly an hour for me, and people need to come to me as I don't drive. As I'd prefer something regular rather than just one-offs, I found that anything further than 1h drive is not sustainable in the long run. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I have a distance on my profile of 25 miles although men seem to ignore it and say they can drive.... I can drive but I don't want to spend my time driving up and down a motorway for sex!! |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"For me it now has to be my own or immediate towns/villages.
My time is tight and I have a child so I have to get childcare. That adds up when you take into account 30+ mins travel each way. Plus getting stuck in traffic/accidents on the A12. Also means there could be issues getting back quickly should my child need me.
Add the cost of diesel not to mention I hate driving lol.
So many guys that message me don't understand this and try and argue the point. Just because you are OK doing it doesn't mean everyone is. "
Couldn’t agree more with this!
Also I personally worry people expect more when travelling a distance for someone they are established with (and I like a no expectation social to start) |
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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough / Stamford |
We very, very rarely make an exception to our "one hour rule". Char suffers from fatigue and pain from chemo and if she's in a car for an hour then she's absolutely useless for anything!
We occasionally have to cancel if her pain or bowel plays up and we would generally be able to give an hours notice. We'd feel awful if someone was two hours into a three hour trip only for us to cancel.
(Bry) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I'd drive about an hour, so 60 miles. From here that would be roughly Brighton, Bournemouth, Bath, Banbury, Brentford...
Good luck doing 60 miles in 60 minutes! "
Yes that might be pushing it, especially into London. Perhaps I should have an hour or 60 miles.... |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"I wouldn't go too far ,especially as any first meet is a social only.I'd also never let anyone travel too far to meet me.
On my couple profile we'd be open to travelling further for the right people ,as it's so hard to find other couples.
Don't want to hijack the thread but so hard to find other couples? That surprises me. Are you looking for something very specific or extremely fussy? "
I'm not extremely fussy and have not been able to find 1 couple I feel compatible with enough to arrange a meet
Think you'll find lots of other couples/single women feel the same |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Seems a simple question but how far would you travel for someone?
I only ask as i live in Ashford kent dont dive but can host .. it seems 30 minutes drive to far for People...."
30 minutes drive may be too far for some people
If someone doesn't want to drive for longer then that's upto them tbh |
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By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough / Stamford |
"Think you'll find lots of other couples/single women feel the same"
We really struggle to find couples (possibly because I only play with the guy half) and Char gets no luck at all on her single account. Fab isn't easy.
(Bry) |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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"Think you'll find lots of other couples/single women feel the same
We really struggle to find couples (possibly because I only play with the guy half) and Char gets no luck at all on her single account. Fab isn't easy.
(Bry)"
It's really not at all
And then to be asked if you're being 'super fussy' because you can't find a couple who's dynamic works with you doesn't help |
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I’ve traveled upwards of 4 hours for a meet before now & organised socials all over the country! So, distance isn’t too much of an issue for me!
That being said, you need to have built up a connection with them, sometimes over months or even years!
I guess It truly depends what you class as swinging?
From the outside many would class Fab as a fuck and go site! The reality is something completely different.
So, How far is to far? It depends on the person & the situation!
Tiger xx |
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We’ve driven about 3-4 hours to meet a couple for the weekend, visit a club in the area. It’s only happened a couple of times though.
We are more than happy to travel up to Glasgow etc 1.5 hours for meets |
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For the right person 100s. I met a woman years ago oddly enough off the back of a vanilla forum. It turned into a pen pal thing, then into a genuine friendship with a sexual element. She lived about 350 miles away from me up in Scotland. I would go up and stay with her for the occational weeknd. She was an awesome woman and well worth the travel. |
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By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
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I don't travel, but anyone that is more than an hour drive I don't even bother with as I know that it's less likely to happen.
I would say half hour or so is just about right as local but not likely to bump into them when walking the dog. X |
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"I don't travel, but anyone that is more than an hour drive I don't even bother with as I know that it's less likely to happen.
I would say half hour or so is just about right as local but not likely to bump into them when walking the dog. X"
What kind of dog is it? |
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By *EloveMan
over a year ago
Pool of Life |
"We really struggle to find couples (possibly because I only play with the guy half) and Char gets no luck at all on her single account. Fab isn't easy.
(Bry)"
Shame, you seem like a lovely couple x |
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Usually up to an hour, but I have done two to three in the past.
I think it depends on who I'm meeting, and the sort of driving - country lanes I find relaxing, but motorway and busy city driving I have less appitite for. |
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By *irldnCouple
over a year ago
Brighton |
It all depends!
For a first time meet, not far at all. Would wait until we were visiting their area or they were already visiting ours before arranging anything.
For subsequent meets, as far as necessary if they were nice people and very hot!
Just flipping things around, if people are travelling a long way to meet us, that puts pressure on as there may be expectations. We are always crystal clear (with first time meets) that there are no guarantees and it is all about whether we all click. If they still choose to travel then that is their risk.
We once had a guy travel from Italy to meet us. We were clear that there were no guarantees etc. He said he was going to combine it with a business trip to London and take the weekend off for a trip to a hotel in Brighton. If we clicked great, if not then he was doing the tourist thing.
We did click. It was awesome. We ended up visiting him in Italy where he hosted amazing orgies near Milan. And best of all, he was a wine exporter so we received loads of great Italian wine over the years! |
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