FabSwingers.com > Forums > Swinging Support and Advice > The perfect intro message?
The perfect intro message?
Jump to: Newest in thread
 |
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
Hi guys,
As I keep seeing profiles explaining what women don’t want as an intro message - and there appears to be a wide variety of tastes on this - I thought it would be interesting/useful to both men and women to find out what works best for you all.
Let’s be having you…  xx |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
The message is pretty irrelevant unless it just Hi, want some fun now? or how’s you? (Nope)
A face picture attached and not a cock pic is good.
It’s not so much the massage it’s the profile, the bio and the verifications that work for us. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
That’s fair enough. I could be wrong, but I get the feeling most people will decide whether to check a profile based on the message they receive.
I appreciate some people don’t want a “hi / how are you doing” start to a message, but it’s kind of a natural way to begin. It seems kind of rude to me not to start with that if you’ve never spoken to someone before. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"For us all we want to know is that you have read the profile not just looked at the pictures. "
That’s fair enough. I think there are a lot of people - I can only really talk about women and couples - who don’t even get to reading the profile.
Not having a whinge btw. It just seems so from my experience. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
"For us all we want to know is that you have read the profile not just looked at the pictures.
That’s fair enough. I think there are a lot of people - I can only really talk about women and couples - who don’t even get to reading the profile.
Not having a whinge btw. It just seems so from my experience. "
No I totally agree with you. I get messages show people clearly don’t read the profile from women and couples all the time. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By *harAndBryCouple
over a year ago
Peterborough / Stamford |
We'd say that the first message is very important, much more so than the profile in fact. Someone that puts an hour into their profile, then sends 200 copy and paste messages without reading anyone else's profiles is putting in so much less effort than someone who spends ten minutes on their profile but then ten minutes on each message they send making sure they are a match.
Our checklist, in sort of order:
Profile pic;
Message subject;
Message content;
Location;
Public pics;
Profile text.
Have a decent profile pic, don't send messages with the subject "X", "mmmmmmmm", "wow", etc, and put some thought into the intro message - pick something out of the recipient's profile to ask about or mention. Point out why you're a good match for them.
Good luck,
(Bry) |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"We'd say that the first message is very important, much more so than the profile in fact. Someone that puts an hour into their profile, then sends 200 copy and paste messages without reading anyone else's profiles is putting in so much less effort than someone who spends ten minutes on their profile but then ten minutes on each message they send making sure they are a match.
Our checklist, in sort of order:
Profile pic;
Message subject;
Message content;
Location;
Public pics;
Profile text.
Have a decent profile pic, don't send messages with the subject "X", "mmmmmmmm", "wow", etc, and put some thought into the intro message - pick something out of the recipient's profile to ask about or mention. Point out why you're a good match for them.
Good luck,
(Bry)"
I see where you’re coming from, but it’s kind of difficult to think of other ways to introduce yourself at first than “hello / hi / how are you doing?” as the opener.
I suppose - mainly because I’m a single guy on here - I gave up writing chapter and verse quite quickly because They still get just as ignored or deleted. Again, not complaining, but it just seemed like a bit of a waste of time.
I have to add, though, I haven’t done too badly really. It’s just an observation than gripe.
And I hope this helps people to improve their approach.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I dont mind a 'hi how are you' as long as there is more than that to the message.
If that is all you send I probably won't reply.
If it is clear someone hasn't read my profile eg asking for something I have clearly stated is not for me I won't reply.
It's not hard to have a read of a profile first and send a message that shows you have bothered and put in a little effort.
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Just the fact that the man had read our profiles first would be helpful.
A message with a face pic attached and why they think they match what I'm looking for would be beneficial. I get loads of unverified by meet men messaging me, even though I state in the first paragraph of my profile that I don't meet them! Sorry to rant but if men can't even read the first paragraph.....  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
I read their profile and as someone else mentioned in the thread pick out something you both like. It's very rare I get post from the ladies had the odd meet but no Veri's I do start with a hello then progress with an interest we both like |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Reading the profile
Read the profile
Have you read the profile?
Your subject line and message will come from ( yes you guessed it)
Reading the profile..
An element of curiosity in your subject sells the message.
Each line in the message should sell the next line.
Keep it short and your message is one out of hundreds
|
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
There was a similar post a few days ago. Best advice has already been said read the profile, yes it can feel a waste of time putting in effort to a message only to have it deleted but it's even more of a waste of time if the person isn't looking for what you're offering and all that was told in their profile.
I talk like I have amazing success on this site. I don't but then again I'm not exactly putting in much effort to meet, I'm more of a club person. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site)
over a year ago
|
Don't listen to these delusional women. Have you had a inbox from them before. Contradictions. I had one women say don't like one liners. Don't say hello hi or Ask how she was.. She then messaged me a simple "hi". I deleted and got abuse.  |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
Everyone will do things differently. Before we even read the message we will have a look at the profile. If there’s not much to see in the way of pictures, information or verifications then the content of the message would need to be very enticing. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
"That’s fair enough. I could be wrong, but I get the feeling most people will decide whether to check a profile based on the message they receive.
I appreciate some people don’t want a “hi / how are you doing” start to a message, but it’s kind of a natural way to begin. It seems kind of rude to me not to start with that if you’ve never spoken to someone before. "
Yes I won't check a profile unless the message shows a that my profile was read and b there is something that piques my interest. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
|
By (user no longer on site) OP
over a year ago
|
"Yes I won't check a profile unless the message shows a that my profile was read and b there is something that piques my interest."
Interesting. I always read profiles, but I feel a bit of a dick just jumping into desires etc. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
We very rarely arrange meets on Fab anymore, preferring organised socials and the one club we go to but when we get a message we look at that first line that shows in the list, if it's just addressed to Debs it gets binned. Then the profile pic, then the pics on the profile, then we read the profile. If that's all ok we read the message.
Having said that we just replied to a message that had an intriguing opening line so who knows what it is that attracts a person enough to reply and possibly meet?
Sometimes it's just an indefinable something that doesn't follow any rules. |
Reply privately, Reply in forum +quote
or View forums list | |
» Add a new message to this topic
